Currently in the hospital and supposed to get my lap band removed. Extremely scared because I have had the lap band since 2008 I lost over 100 pounds but in the last year I have gained about 10 pounds give or take and kind of in a yo-yo way. I will gain 10 pounds I would lose 10 pounds I will gain 10 pounds I will lose 10 pounds and its kind of been like that on repeat for the past year. Apart from that for the past year I've had a lot of issues with heartburn and if I push too hard or strain too much I feel this sort of twisting on the inside. it's hard to describe and explain.
So after like two CAT scans and ultrasounds and an x-ray I am being told my lap band has slipped and because I have become nauseous and holding food down is kind of a touch and go like it might stay down today but tomorrow I might throw it up it is better that I get my lap band removed.
I am not going to lie when I say I am devastated I am sad I was in tears last night in the ER and my husband kind of gets it but doesn't fully understand. I am just really scared about gaining weight. I do not want to go back to the fat old me.
So I was admitted last night and here I lay in my room thinking about what is going to happen. Am i going to gain all this weight back and how hard is it going to be to keep it off and when will I be my normal self I guess, will I be able to exercise which I haven't been able to do because of that twisting feeling on the inside, I'm just very sad....a part of me is being removed today and I'm not happy about it
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