kitmouse

I'm right before you, July 27!

Thank you blondie66! I appreciate all the tips.

My surgery is in 14 days. I'm nervous and impatient and excited all at once. We just have to hang in there!

I got my authorization today! This just got really real, you know? I've been working toward this since January, and it's so soon! In three weeks and two days I will be on the other side. Yikes!

That's my date too! And I just got my authorization today, so it's really real now!

I graduated from La Jolla high school! Right now we live in college grove by SDSU, but I grew up in Tierrasanta. I cant imagine coping with so much rain all the time. Once in awhile is lovely but not daily.

Where in San Diego did you live? I've lived here since I was 8 (I'm 42). I've only been to Washington state twice, but it was lovely both times!

I'm in San Diego. Surgeon is Dr. Julie Ellner. Where are you?

I'm July 27! I agree, when they called with the date I sat up straight and all of the sudden it was real. 4 weeks from tomorrow life changes forever!

I'm down 25 pounds. So it's not like I've not been trying. I'm frustrated. I understand that they have their reservations about after surgery, but realistically I'm relearning a lifetime of eating. I'm not going to be perfect. I beat up on myself really strongly fir not being perfect, and it's my eternal shame that I can't seem to try hard enough to actually BE perfect (yes, that thought is messed up, and yes, I'm working with a therapist). I haven't been dreaming about eating, though! Oh no. I've been having nightmares. It's been fun. In the first nightmare I dreamt I was driving and trying to get to this lovely beautiful castle, but I kept driving off the edge of the cliff instead. All while telling my passenger that I knew where I was going and what I was doing! Yeah, that was subtle. Then last night I dreamt that one of our cats had given birth to a litter of kittens under the bed, and two of them were already dead. We were trying to figure out who the mom was, and finally I realized that it was Slurpee. Who is male. But [in my dream] I realized that the vet had done the wrong surgery when we had him fixed, and now we had a litter of dead and starving kittens. Yeah, that wasn't subtle either. So, yeah. This whole "really behind" and "step it up" thing is stressing me out. I hate striving for something with undefined goalposts.

I went for my final nutritional visit on Thursday. I didn't lose anything (no gain either--my weight was exactly the same) and my surgeon told me I was "really behind" and needed to "step up". Huh? Behind WHAT? There's no weight loss minimum for insurance, and even if there were like 10% I'm at 8% already, so...? If I could lose weight easily I wouldn't be seeking surgery! I commented on the fact that I've been super hungry this month, and she told me I should only be eating when I have physical signs of low blood sugar--shakiness, headache, fogginess. Everything else is just grehlin driving head hunger and not a valid reason to eat I always thought "head hunger" was emotional eating and cravings, so apparently I've been eating according to the wrong cues my ENTIRE life?? I'm supposed to go in for weekly weigh ins to get "back on track". It feels punitive. But anyway. So I went home kinda irritated and annoyed. About an hour after I got home her secretary called to say that my surgery is tentatively scheduled for July 27 (pending insurance approval)! Whhhaaaaaat??? Five weeks! OMG! I paid really close attention today and noted how I felt every half hour. I didn't let myself eat until I had physical signs I needed to, so...I didn't eat all day. I had water, of course. I had my vitamins. But I was super busy at work, at times I had 3 patients working and one waiting to be called back, so I discounted "tired" as a sign of low blood sugar. And I just never got any other signs. Then driving home I was feeling really tired--after a ten hour day, during an hour-long 40-mile commute. When I got home I took my knitting and sat on the couch to watch some tv. I decided that the foggy sleepiness was at least partly low blood sugar and tried to eat a triple zero Greek yogurt (fat free sugar free). Couldn't get past the aftertaste. Gag! Then I had a spoonful of peanut butter, and went to bed. So yesterday ALL I had all day was a spoonful of yogurt, and a spoonful of peanut butter. And 3 liters of water with crystal light. And my vitamins. So I'm 5 weeks away from surgery, apparently I have been following the wrong hunger cues all my life, and I have no idea when it's appropriate to eat. I don't have enough time to learn and practice! I'm really feeling scared right now. Can I really do this? Is surgery a mistake? If I can learn to only eat when I've got low blood sugar do I NEED surgery? Am I really not supposed to eat when ghrelin tells me I'm hungry? Isn't that why we HAVE ghrelin??? I'm so confused.

Yay for everyone who is already scheduled! Me, not so much. Yesterday my dermatologist called. I need to be tested for a surgical tape allergy--my surgeon insists, which is right and good and I have no objection to that. But they had to reschedule my appointment to be tested to July 24th! My last weigh-in with my surgeon is JUNE 22. I keep telling myself that it's perfect, I'll have time for my last nutrition appointment, time to get insurance approval, time to schedule surgery around my own patient schedule, time to save up more PTO for work...but it still feels like forever and a day away. It's just getting further away, not closer!

Well hey, I live in San Diego so if you need anything I'll see how I can help!

Oh my goodness that's fast! Where in San Diego are you having surgery? My surgeon (in San Diego) insists on you staying within half an hour of the office for at least the first week! Flying that soon after surgery is REALLY not safe, I'm already worried for you. ☹️ Your boss is a jerk! This is medical, it's not like you're taking vacation! Does your surgeon know you're working/flying that soon after the procedure?

I'm doing at least one meal a day of a protein drink (some days two meals) and following the Liver Shrinking Diet my surgeon gave me. I've been on it for four months (not entirely perfectly) and I've lost 25 pounds. ETA: oh, and water (at least 3 liters a day), no carbonation, no caffeine. I love Crystal Light though! And regular supplements (multi, calcium, B complex, D3).

I'm down 25 pounds total at today's weigh in. No gain AND I'm below 300!!! YESSSSSSSS!!! I have no one to tell but I'm so excited! One more weigh in visit and then everything will be submitted. I need my mammogram report, nutritionist consult, primary care release, and dermatology (testing for tape allergy). Phiew!

I've got 165-ish to take off (roughly 50% of my highest weight) and I'm stalled at 20 pounds down on the pre-op diet. I'm struggling with hunger and impatience and defeatist thinking, but I'm trying to focus on TODAY. What can I "do right" today? This morning I got up and went for a 5k walk out in the sunshine, and thought about my goals of hiking and running and doing all my physical things. Then I drank some protein water and reminded myself again. I guess all I can say is try not to look st the huge overwhelming goal. Yes you're working toward that, but look at what's right in front of you. Do that right. And repeat.

I AM NOT LOSING. I'm freaking out. I have a nutrition appointment on Tuesday and I'm stuck at four pounds heavier than last visit. I had a Mirena IUD inserted three months ago, and now I'm stuck. I'm doing full liquids, protein shakes and low carbs. I'm freaking out because I'm showing a gain and I'm terrified that insurance will deny me, and this is visit #5. I'm so close!

So exciting!!

I weighed 324 at my first weigh in. Now I weigh 304. I have sleep apnea, and they thought I had Barrett's Esophagus but the second endoscopy said no. Other than that I'm healthy. I have no faith in my body adjusting. It was three weeks of deteriorating energy til I ate some carbs two days ago. Now my energy is better and my brain fog has cleared--and my weight is up. UGH. ☹️

It's lean meats, eggs, and non-starchy veggies. No dairy. One month in she had me make one meal a day a protein drink (no more than 15 grams of protein) and at my last visit she suggested "half the time" I do two protein drinks and one meal a day. She said I should be able to drop 10-12 pounds a month. For 6 months. And 1 hour of exercise 5 days a week, and an hour of "light activity" the other two days (like walking) Except it's really hard, especially with an active job (I'm a physical therapist, I work 10 hour days). I'm exhausted. I can feel my metabolism slowing down. I'm colder than I've been in a long time. I'm sleeping all the time. My brain is foggy. And weight loss has ground to a halt these last three weeks. My body is GOOD at this--hunkering down when it's starved. What does she think got me here in the first place??? I'm trying to stay the course, but I'm failing. ☹️

I had my 4th diet check up today. I'm down 20 pounds, and my doctor confirmed that June (already scheduled!!) will be the last one and then they will immediately submit, "So surgery in July!" Eeeeep that's so SOON!!!

Oh that sounds good. Makes me think...peppermint extract? Orange extract? Didn't eggface have a protein ice cream recipe? Peppermint hot chocolate (protein drink) in the evening sounds nice! Maybe a Mexican hot chocolate with a pinch of cinnamon? I'll have to play around...(says me, who just drank one straight because I couldn't be bothered).

Somewhere I picked up the suggestion to try microwaving your protein shakes. Chocolate turns into hot chocolate, caramel turns into...hot caramel, and the vanilla can be mixed with coffee if you drink it (I don't) for a...what would that be? Cappuccino? Anyway, you get the idea. Put it in a mug (DO NOT MICROWAVE PREMIER PROTEIN SHAKES IN THEIR PACKAGING, IT LOOKS LIKE PAPER BUT IT CAUSES ARCING) and zap for 30 seconds. Stir. Keep heating and stirring in 30-second intervals until it's as hot as you like. Try adding some sugar free flavoring, maybe. Have fun with it! Get creative!

I just found out that I am not eligible for FMLA because my company (I'm a contractor on Camp Pendleton) does not have 50 employees in a 75 mile radius. I've asked about taking unpaid leave since I won't have enough paid vacation to cover the 4 weeks my surgeon mandates, and I've gotten no response. My surgeon's receptionist says they really can't predict exactly when surgery will be because it's based on both insurance approval and the assistant surgeon's schedule. So now I'm kinda up in the air. They also say some of the tests mandated by my insurance have 6 month expirations and others have 12 month expirations. So if it's pushed back too far I may need to redo some testing. I'm really not happy about not qualifying for FMLA!