PoppyT

Hi all. 
I am one of those who have always been the "solid" one in the family.  My siblings, children, nieces and nephews are all tall and slender and then there is me.  I have struggled with my weight ever since I left school and stopped all the exercise and sport I used to do.  I crushed my spine some time ago which hasn't helped as I have to be careful of what I do now.  At least I am walking and can run again when I get fit.  NO skiing (water or snow), or contact sport though.  Too risky. 
I am an enigma in many ways.  Not your general female interests lol.  I love socializing and entertaining.  That may be an issue in the short term but I am sure I will cope.  I adore speedway and motorsports.  My partner and I have several muscle cars and he builds race engines for cars and jet boats.  We spend many weekends pursuing this interest around the country.  I love watching all sorts of sport which is part of why we have the satellite sports channels.  We have 6 grandchildren between us which is lovely and enjoying being with them whenever we can.  I love theatre and am involved with our local amateur society so that takes a fair bit of time.  I have always been involved with music, in bands in earlier years and also with classical music.  My darling and I love nothing better than to go to outdoor concerts on regular occasions.  I also enjoy travelling to experience other cultures and have been fortunate enough to have done so.  I go on my own with no hesitation.  I am also involved in a voluntary organization called Victim Support which works alongside the police to help victims of crime and trauma get through the judicial processes and to move through the emotional and psychological issues which arise.  Very satisfying.   Oh, and yes, I work full-time as an accountant.
After my two children, I never lost the baby weight and in fact ended up heavier than when I was 9 months pregnant which is saying something as I put on huge amounts of weight with each of them.  Now in my late 50's, I have made the decision that I have wasted significant amounts of money over the past 35 odd years on a multitude of diets, gyms, and the like, and not made any progress in losing the weight I abhor.  In reality I could have paid for WLS twice over and wish I had done it years ago.
Why am I going for WLS surgery?  I hate myself in a mirror, I hate the way I look in clothes and I want to be fit and healthy again.  I am over my big body dictating my life for me.  A BMI which is just under the severely obese category makes me feel a failure.  I know my partner loves me as I am which is just so wonderful but as I say, I don't love me.  I am so lucky that he is supportive and I won't say happy but accepting of the fact that I am at long last going to do it.
Yes, I am apprehensive about the changes which have to happen with having WLS and I know there will be many challenges, troughs and peaks.  I know I can't possibly predict all the issues which will arise but at least I am prepared in that I know there will be many.  I am lucky in that I have BariatricPal and all those members to assist me in my journey.  I am also lucky in that I have a "wingman" in a friend who had the surgery 18 months ago and she has been invaluable in the information she has been able to provide.  I am lucky in that one of my sisters is incredibly supportive also. 
I am going through medical tourism to have my surgery and it is booked in for late March 2017.  Tickets, visas and all prepared.  I have to admit to a moment of apprehension when I booked the tickets and I know the doubts will surface again when I am hopping on the plane to go but at least I am prepared for it and being the headstrong person I can be, I won't back out. 
BariatricPal is going to be my go to for some time yet as there will always be someone here who has experienced what I will go through and give advice.