Berry78

The mirror lies. Get pictures and video with you interacting with other people. That's how you can see your "true" self. Your doctor can help guide you to the ideal scale weight.. but according to BMI, you can drop quite a bit more before having to worry about getting "too thin". Keep in mind that most people regain 10-15lbs after hitting their lowest weight, so it's worthwhile to drop as low as is reasonable to guard against the bit of regain. (For the same reason, keep the clothing you are wearing now, even when you drop to the next lower size). People that know us aren't used to us being thin. They start worrying, frequently well before it's warranted. Assure your friends/family that you are working closely with your doctor, and your ultimate size will be a healthy one.

At 32 years old, I was 5'7 and 305lbs. No serious health problems. My blood pressure was borderline high, but no other issues. I was married, with children, and liked myself. No self-esteem issues. By time I was 38, my blood sugars were inching up into the prediabetic range. My blood pressure shot through the roof, and I went on a blood pressure medicine. Walking up a steep hill had me vomiting at the top. Stairs had me seeing stars. I woke up one day, and just KNEW I needed surgery for my weight. (I have no idea where the idea came from because I hadn't heard of bariatric surgery for 20 years.. I just woke up with the idea.. weird!). I had surgery 8 months ago, self pay in Mexico, and have lost 105lbs. My blood pressure is down and I no longer need meds, I think my blood sugars are back to normal (I have a checkup this week, so will find out more). I can jog up a few steps, without issue, and the hill is no longer a major challenge. And here's the thing. I wasn't exercising before the surgery, and I haven't started yet, after. All of these benefits are JUST from losing the weight from surgery and by controlling my diet. That's it! Most patients start an exercise program right off the bat, but I didn't. One day I will, but at least I am a clean example of what surgery and caloric restriction can accomplish, even without exercise. With your knees in that condition, exercise for you should be in the swimming pool. This may be easy, or challenging, depending on your location/circumstances. For me, living in a too-large body interfered with a normal life in several ways. I couldn't fit in a plane seat (no honeymoon in Hawaii!), and waiting room chairs were always tight. Sex wasn't interesting or fun. I couldn't cross my legs, and tying shoes was a chore. Shaving my legs was a joke, and pubic hair maintenance? Can't maintain what you can't reach or see. Family reunions were a source of embarrassment (family isn't heavy), and even the thought of entering the workforce was a concern because standing on my feet for 8 hours was unimaginable. (I've been a stay at home Mom since 2008, but getting out of the house would be good.. emotionally and financially). Avoidance of pictures since my visage had become bloated and unrecognizable. That last makes it sound like there were self esteem issues, and by time I was 38, these issues HAD cropped up (more than there had been at 32). Now, ALL of these issues are better. Sex would be better if I exercised. I haven't started working yet, but now I feel confident that I'll be ABLE to. Looking in the mirror is like seeing an old friend. I didn't know how heavy the burden of obesity was, until the weight was lifted. I'm still 30-40lbs from goal, and I look forward to feeling better and better.

I agree with the "6 month end to honeymoon". I'm 8 months out, and I noticed a dramatic change in how much I could eat and my hunger levels at the 6 month mark. The weight loss has slowed dramatically since that time... partly because of increasing my calories, and my body is much smaller, so doesn't burn as many. Double whammy. Counting calories (or portions) HAS to figure into your every day existence... forever. It's not that you can't have a snack. It's that you can't have an unscheduled/unaccounted for snack, and if you do, you'll have to make up for it later, or experience slow/no losses. Yesterday I went on a bender and pretty much ate just cake all day. Yes. I'm not perfect. But, even though it wasn't planned for ahead of time, I can "catch up" from it by being extra strict for the next 6 days. That way my weekly total will still work out. A single day of really strict dieting doesn't make a difference to long term weight any more than a single day of falling off the wagon. It's the day in and day out habits (the weekly and monthly calorie totals) that ultimately make the impact on the scale. I can also make the choice to just "forget yesterday", and just go back to normal eating (restricted, but without being extra strict). Not sure if a bit of self-flagellation is needed from going off plan.. you know.. consequences to your actions.. or just be lenient and let it slide. I'm afraid that letting it slide may just invite future misbehavior. The right choice for me may be the wrong choice for someone else. But, you see, we have to think these things through. Maybe we should budget calories like we do money. Most of us have a limited supply of dollars in any given month, and know if we buy this thing, it prevents us from buying that thing. We have to make choices. If we let our calories slide, day after day, we pay with no movement (or wrong-direction movement) of the scale. But, the scale is really a poor indicator of how you have done TODAY or THIS WEEK. Accountability for these short-term actions has to come from tracking and planning on the day to day. Most of this post is just me thinking aloud for how to fix ME. I already keep a dry erase board in the kitchen with my food categories and quantities for the day. As I eat my food, I check it off. But, at the end of the day, I erase it, and start over the next day. There is no long-term record or accountability to show me how often I'm straying. I think I'll have to keep a calendar, and give myself a "green" for the days I follow plan, a "yellow" for the days I only stray a bit with extra protein or veggies, an "orange" for days I eat extra starchy veggies, and a "red" for sugar or grains (and "black" for all-cake days.. so far, in 8 months, this was my first "black" day.. so at least there's that!). That way I can see a quick rundown on how many days I'm actually off plan, and where I need to work on it.

This is definitely a hard one. I really hope to avoid plastics myself, but I'm not working with anything as dramatically ..."gifted"... as you are. Not sure what cup size you are wearing, but I'm 30lbs from goal and wear a 36DDD bra, and am overflowing a bit, so I actually need the next cup size bigger (what size is that anyway? E? F?). Not buying a bigger bra since I'm hoping to keep shrinking. (I started out at 42DDD, so my band/cup keeps shrinking proportionally). Aesthetically, people tend to prefer an hourglass figure, which means your chest should approximate your hip measurement. It doesn't really matter what "people" like, of course.. it matters what YOU like. But if you do decide on a reduction, I recommend aiming for DDD or smaller, so you can wear bras from regular stores. (If I had your chest, I probably WOULD opt for surgery.. to minimize future back pain, and for better clothing fit.. but gosh, there are risks there too. Tough choice!).

It is NOT normal to go a week or two without a BM. It happens, but it shouldn't. Even with reduced food consumption, your body's waste products (on the cellular level) gets put into the digestive tract for disposal. You don't want those waste products sitting around in your system, putrefying, and potentially getting reabsorbed. Anesthesia puts your digestive tract to sleep for longer than yourself. It could take 2-3 days for everything to wake back up on the inside. Once it's awake, it's ideal for the first movement to happen in a couple days. Which means a BM on day 5. When it gets longer than that, it's time to take action. An enema is good for immediate relief. Schedule 30-40 minutes in the restroom, and you will likely be successful. Milk of magnesia, miralax, smooth move tea... all of these can be used as well during the early weeks. Try to have a BM every 2-3 days after the first one. Once you are onto purees and soft foods, (and meeting your fluid goals), introducing a fiber supplement is good for long term maintenance. Do NOT take fiber if you don't drink enough, it could cause an impaction.

StartingFresh, you may want to get your thyroid levels checked. Hyperthyroidism can cause sweating and anxiety. (Many of us are on thyroid medications for low-thyroid levels, but with weight loss, we need to adjust our dose.) Even if you aren't on thyroid meds, it's worth taking a look.

Insurance companies have their requirements, and there is no getting out of working through their process. So, you waited for your insurance to cover the surgery (rather than, say.. going to Mexico for self-pay), so jumping through some hoops for 6 months or so really isn't a huge deal in the big-picture. I'm sorry about your losses Having cared for my hubby's grandfather (alzheimer's), and currently father (stroke), I know just how draining the care-giving roll can be. (And the relief when the patient is finally set free). It makes sense that you are now ready to turn the focus onto caring for YOU. Which is oh-so-needed right now. Use these months to learn as much about the surgery as you can. Don't just rely on the program to give you all the information you need. (It's a good starting place though). There is much more to living for the rest of your life as a bariatric patient than just consuming the special diet for two months after the surgery. The single most important change you need to make in your relationship with food is to come to see it simply as fuel/building blocks for your body. Pretty much all patients view food with a love/hate/crave/fear kind of relationship. All of that needs to go away and be replaced with "I eat because my body requires it". It's fine to ENJOY your food. But the hang-ups must be dropped. Nutritional deficiencies are rampant in the obese and bariatric populations. We need to FEED our bodies. Our excess fat will provide energy, but it doesn't help us with our protein/vitamin/mineral/fiber requirements. So, we need to learn to meet all THOSE requirements on a day to day basis, while consuming fewer calories. Surgery isn't magic. It's the ability to eat a small number of calories for months on end that results in the dramatic weight losses. By carefully controlling our diets, we can consume what we need in 700-1100 calories a day. I'm 8 months postop, and about 30 pounds from goal. I have not yet entered maintenance, but can tell that I will ALWAYS have to be "on a diet". I can already eat enough calories to stop losses in its tracks, (and a few extra bites every day would show up as regain) so it's up to me to limit how much I eat every day. I hope to live for another 40-50 years.. so I have to have long-term health as my goal, which means eating enough nutrient-dense food to rebuild/repair myself.

I've been having a lot of problems with suspected orthostatic hypotension lately. When I stand up, things go dim and I'm a bit light headed.. but after about 5-10 seconds it gets better. I know to go get a big drink when it happens. Preop I had high blood pressure. Not sure what it's running now. (I'm not on meds anymore). In the past I've had that "tv screen" vision happen.. I don't know what caused it, but it happened in a place like a mall. A lot of walking and visual stimulus. I have a checkup this week, so I'll let y'all know if I find out anything.

You are 6 months postop.. and with all that you've been going through, I suspect you haven't been getting the proper nutrition. You have an awful lot of concerning physical symptoms that might be related to nutritional deficiencies. If you can see a doctor for tests, that would be ideal. (I know since you are between jobs, that may be difficult). At the very least, you need to be on some very good vitamins. A good multi with iron, B-12, and calcium citrate. Check with social services to see if you can qualify for financial/food/medical/housing assistance. Something that can help you get back on your feet. Ask about discount clinics where you might receive reduced-cost medical care. As for the psychiatrist.. coulda, woulda, shoulda... doesn't matter. Here you are, and you DID have the surgery.. now your job is to find the care you need while you are getting used to your new normal. Focus on regaining your physical health, and once that has been accomplished, you may find your mental health has improved too. (And I'm not talking about weight loss = being healthy.. I'm talking about getting a doctor to run those blood tests to see what .. if anything... is wrong at the moment).

So awesome!! And to think, you are doing this well PRE-op! You're gonna blow everyone away when you get to postop!!

I think you should tell your doctor about it. This early postop, your doctor should be informed of anything you are concerned about.

I was curious, so checked the sodium. The day you quoted really was quite high at 2,680mg. The recommended daily limit is 2,300mg. But, my usual day has only 1,500mg, even with canned beans or soup. The difference was the 2nd portion of cottage cheese, full-sodium soup (I usually only buy low-sodium), and the sardines (my usual meat for the day is fresh, not canned. Occasionally there isn't any fresh meat in the house, so I have some canned fish for back-up). So, thank you for pointing this out. As I get out further from surgery, my interest in cooking is returning a bit, and I'll see where I can make more fresh foods. Canned foods are super convenient when you can only eat 3-6oz of something. What do your meals look like?

In general, as soon as you feel ready. I could have at a week postop (not missionary though).

For the record, I had to look up the "making it rain" gesture, and without the money in the hand, it does look like it could be an insult. So, thanks for teaching me something! This thread is great!

What is the name of the problem? (I've heard of Mitral valve prolapse, but am not sure what else can go wrong).

11/29 Sitting at 200lbs exactly.

I'll echo what others said. This is a journey to health on which you have embarked, but the journey doesn't start the day of bariatric surgery. The journey begins the day you DECIDE to take charge and DO something about your health. The surgery its self is but a minor hurdle that happens at some point during the journey (for some it's right at the beginning, for others it's 5 or 10 year .. or more.. after the beginning). Fingers crossed that your mitral valve will start behaving itself soon.

I count all fluids. Tea, coffee, milk, v8, coconut water, etc. Actually I don't literally count fluids anymore. I drink when I think about it or feel thirsty. It's important to count for the first few months, though, to make sure you hit your goals.

I'm 8 months out and am not yet at goal. By time I meet my protein goals and get some non-starchy veggies in, there is only room (calorically) for a single serving of fruit, grains, or potatoes. Any more than that and the weight loss slows to a crawl. Your gluten patties aren't a starch, they count as protein. (I have personal reservations about eating concentrated gluten, but don't let my unfounded concerns change what you are doing).

That's a bid against carbohydrate-heavy foods. (They tend to provide calories without much nutrition.. and that can get in the way of meeting goals and/or weight loss).

Gluten is the protein portion of wheat. Some people are sensitive to gluten (as in celiac's disease). But that's another issue. It isn't really the gluten we are usually concerned about.. it's either the carbs and/or the gummy texture that is undesirable postop.

Neuropathy (from B-12 deficiency) isn't always permanent. It CAN be permanent, (about 50% of the time from what I've read). It can take 3-6 months to start feeling better... healing doesn't happen super quickly. Fingers crossed it'll start feeling better relatively soon.

In Tijuana, there are the "haves and have nots". One of the valets explained that construction workers could earn as little as ... I wanna say $5.00 a day. And from the stores we visited, cost of living isn't THAT cheap.. so basically they'd have to work most of a day just to afford a gallon of milk ($2 or $3 a gallon I think). (My memory is usually better, but it was a whirlwind, just a couple days postop, so I just remember the gist of the conversation). Not everyone earns so little.. but yeah... if there is a minimum wage, it isn't enough for a person to live on. A hundred bucks for tipping is enough, and considering the combined expenses of the surgery, it's not unreasonable.

If you have a companion, they will help them get food, etc. They will also walk with you as you are pacing the halls getting your gas bubbles worked out. (They are there for safety and companionship). I know Dr. Illan is (or already has) moved locations, and so I was at the Oasis of Hope hospital. I don't know how the new one is set up.