ARNOLDSMB

I have just scheduled the last test that I have to do before submitting for insurance approval. I am so excited about getting to this point. But I have a really hard time just walking any distance right now. So I am wondering right after surgery, say first week, third week and then say sixth week, how much exercise have you done? I want to be able to push myself to do more but I just was trying to find out what other folks had experienced. Is walking enough the first month or do I need to get into gym for first month?

I am just beginning this journey. I was not overweight until about 16 years ago. I went from 140 lbs to 240 lbs and over about 2 years and now I am at 270 lbs and I am 5 4. My weight began with taking antidepressants and having a huge appetite. Before I realized it I had gained 100 lbs. I met with a surgeon on Nov 15 and have pretty much been excited about the prospect of losing weight. But I have so much shame about being obese. When I was smaller I guess I was attractive or at least people complimented me. But I have experienced the way people treat heavy people since them and I now avoid everyone. I go to the grocery when there are less people. I will not let anyone take my picture and I absolutely have no idea of the woman who stares back at me when I look in the mirror. I am now over 50 and I know I will never look like I did 15 years ago. But it really hurts. I will not shop for clothes except online. I lost my husband 5 years ago and I have completely withdrew from society because I absolutely hate what I look like. I know that the weight loss will help but it will not fix what is in my head. I have friends who are heavy and I have never once thought about it in the way I judge myself. I don't go with my girl friends because I don't want them to be embarrassed by me. I hate the clothes I buy and how I look in them. I am beginning therapy to help but this sense of not being worthy to have or try to have another relationship in my life is a problem. I am just so afraid of how much it will hurt if I get rejected. So I just stay to myself. I ask all of you to please tell if you have experienced anything like I have.

Totally and utterly beautiful. I hope I can do as well!!! This definitely gives me a reason to push on. And hopefully I will have similar results.

Are there others who are just at the beginning of this process and told some of your close friends about it? I did. I saw my surgeon on Nov 15 2016. I came home so excited and empowered because there were many in the waiting room who were happy to talk to me about it. I have been told "Oh you could just use that NutriSYSTEM like Marie Osmond. Have you tried it? I just know if you use a 1200 calorie diet you could do this all by yourself. or You are taking the easy way out. You just need willpower. I have lost 15 pounds on that. I don't think you have given the diet the best try. It killed my excitement and now I plan to keep things to myself. These people are not morbidly obese and at the highest probably weigh 135 lbs. Can anyone else relate to this? and for others that are further along in the process offer me more advice on how to handle these people?

Thank you to all have responded. I can't tell you how much it means to have someone who knows what I have went thru trying to lose weight. I am so glad I have this site to talk to others who are on this same journey. I think being able to be supportive to others is a great gift. So Thank you!

My daughter is a nurse and she understands. But I know she is worried about me being able to make the commitment it is going to take for me to do this. But I also have some friends that think I just haven't tried hard enough. I had qualified for surgery 4 years ago and then didn't have it done because I let others and family members take precedent over me ( and my need to take care of myself first). I let guilt and their ability to make me feel like I was not worthy of taking care of myself first because they needed me and if I were recovering from surgery I might not be able to do the things that they wanted done. I wish I had went through with it 4 years ago. But I also got the impression that if I lost weight I would be "more attractive" and then I would not be the one that they always could put down (some sort of envy and elevating themselves over me). Sick huh?...But I am going to do this to make sure I am around for my daughter's wedding and for future grandchildren. Most of all I am going to care of me. Because at the rate I am going I am not going to be around for anyone. I know you are worried but you need to do this for you and your health. And that will be the best thing for your father and your son. And believe me, I have so much doubt in me. But every time I get those nagging thoughts. I am going to tell myself I can do this. And I am worth any inconvenience it may cause other people in my family. And if that doesn't work, I am going to log on to this site and read and post and get my spirits back up. If you need support, please post and I will definitely try to encourage you and hopefully you can encourage me and all of us who are on this journey can help each other. Good luck but don't let anyone tell you it is better to not do something about it. You have to realize that you are just taking care of you so that you will be able to be there for your family. I hope this helps....I am in the same boat.