Hi, the funny thing is I did change before the surgery. I had it on January 14, 2008. I lost about 20 pounds before the surgery by going on a protein powder shake diet. Then after the surgery I could only eat a 1/4 cup of broth and that felt great to be full after that little bit. You see, that is what I thought the surgey would be like. But now that it is the beginging of March, I think I am eating too much. I have had my first fill and I can still eat 2 chicken thighs and some cooked carrots and then I feel full. I have not lost anymore weight since January 27. I have lost 40 pounds all together. I was excited at my first fill because I lost 6 inches around my butt and thighs but had not lost any weight. weird. I guess I am trying to say- If you can, drink a protien powder shake for breakfast, one for lunch and then a palm sized piece of protein with some kind of green leafy vegetable like broccoli or spinich. That is what my surgeon put me on. I ate more than a palm size and I ate a big bowl of broccoli with squirt butter. Mean while, I did have my "last" meals-lasagna, chinese buffet etc. But pretty much stuck to the diet. mostly. You can do it. You are just thinking that after you won't be able to have those foods but in reality you will be able to eat those foods just not as much of it.
I still have to figure out why I can eat so much. I will tell the surgeon next time I go in.
I hope I have helped some. You do not have to be so hard on yourself. Just remember God is in charge and you can always rely on Him.