Beausie Bunny

I am a year out from surgery tomorrow. I had RNY 11/07/16. I lost 155 lbs. Now I have gained back 15. I'm stuck because I suffer from Major Depressive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety. I go to therapy weekly and group every other week. I also am on medication for my mental illness. All I want to do is eat. I don't drink soda or alcohol. I get around 50-60 grams of protein a day. The rest is sugar and carbs. I feel so hopeless and like I've let everyone down. I can eat a whole box of cookies in an evening. I try to drink calorie-free things. I do well for a couple days and just do soft foods and track my calories and get protein, then I get depressed and overeat. I don't want people getting onto me but I'm getting suicidal due to this problem. I can't get big again. I'd rather die. I have an appointment for a one year checkup later this month and I'm so frustrated and depressed that I feel worthless. Has anyone experienced anything like this? Any advice? I'm in DBT and therapy and trying everything I know to do. I'm a college student and always on the go, I need some help. Thanks in advance.

brightfaith, I am calling my therapist this afternoon. I just need help in some way. I also have made an appointment with my psychiatrist to talk to him about medication changes. I feel like one is working and one is not, so a change may be needed. Thank you for your response. I just feel alone.