JudyRoss

I said earlier that 6 years ago my fiance then (now my husband) was against the gastric bypass because his good friend had died on the operating table. Well, he still is against it and lap band surgery. Last night he asked me what I was doing online so late and I said, "getting medical adivce about weight loss". This morning I told him about my most recent surgery and why I was denied any but local anesthetic because my BMI is 50. He didn't know I'd shrunk to 5' 3.5". He went with me to the last appointment and was releived when the Dr. said they wouldn't do it. He does not want me to die. He likes being married to me. So, I explained today that I was going to look into the surgery again because of what the nurse told me. He made a very good point. He said, "If they can't put you under, how can they do the surgery?" I dunno. How do they administer the anesthetic? Have they told you since your surgery is only a week away? I explained that I would have to go through counseling, 6 months of weight loss, and probably some other tests before I could get the surgery, anyway. He does understand how fed up I am with the extra weight. So he agreed to start dieting with me (by cutting back on portions even more than we have already). So, now he's on board with step one. I love it that he will diet with me and maybe lose about 100 lbs., although he's very cute the way he is (he looks like Sean Conry in Santa's body). It will be easier WITH his support than without it, and I can see that his concerns are valid. I've delt with his conservative considerations for almsot 30 years and this will help us come to a mutually agreeable solution (read: I'll get my way :laugh: eventually if I make a good decision and persuade him gradually). This helped, so thanks again. JudyRoss

Here is an interesting insurance story: Sometimes all it takes to switch insurance is to change your address. If you are 24, are you living with your parents? I thought you would have to live at their address to qualify. This is probably more than you want to know, but to learn all this took me some research. My point is further research might be the answer to solving the problem. Here is my example: We have a somewhat unique situation that really turned out to be a huge benefit. We have homes in both California (San Jose) and Washington (Grapeview). We prefer living in Washington. I am retired from IBM so our insurance is through my retirement. We pay for it, but not nearly as much as purchasing it on our own. Every year we have the opportunity to change our options/selection, just like if we were employed. I've had two full knee replacements in the last two years and two foot surgeries as well as the most recent carpel tunnel surgery in Washington at Group Health. However, we have our insurance through Kaiser in California. Here is how it works: First: We are about 150 miles from the nearest Kaiser facility in Washington. We are only 30 miles from Group Health. Second: We are only covered by Kaiser because our registered home address is in California. When we recive medical care in California we would have to pay a $20 co-pay for each visit. Kaiser is under the Permanente Corporation who also own Group Health. When I'm in Washington (where I now choose to get most of my medical care) I pay NO co-pay at Group Health. On the other hand, if I had registered my address in Washington, I not only would pay another $100/month for the premiums, but I'd also have to pay a co-pay for my visits. Go figure. I will eventually switch our address to WA when we sell the last house in CA and I can qualify for Medicare. Then my IBM sponsored supplemental insurance will be through Group Health and the premiums of $544 (including vision and dental) will go down to about $80/month. When it was time to sign up for insurance again last October, I called the support people and asked them which way to go. The answer was, "registering your address in CA is still the best, it will save you $100/month and all the co-pay", so that is what we did. When I first signed up for insurance because of a move, it was in June, mid-year and no problemo. I know you are not moving from state to state, but call and find out if a local change of address would qualify you for a mid-year change to your company's sponsored plan. You would be surprised how helpful some of these benefit consultants can be. They get paid for providing good customer service and making you happy, not for "saving the company money" by refusing you insurance. Also, someone suggested your contact your HR department. Talk to them, as well, and see if you can brainstorm the change. Life is a game. There are hurdles and goals. Loses and wins. You will make your goal. You will win. JudyRoss

Yes, you may have to make several life changes to be successful. Almost 6 years ago I was all set to have gastric bypass. My fiance of 25 years (now my husband of 4) who is also very heavy, had a friend die on the operating table and was concerned I could die, so we decided I should not do it. I lost 60 lbs on Atkins but you can only eat that way for a few years. Now my BMI is almost 50. I've shrunk 2 inches as I've gotten older. I talked to my Group Health Doctor a year ago about lap band (my husband was with me) and he said they didn't do it. However, I recently found out they do it now. Well, I just had minor (carpel tunnel) surgery and they wouldn't give me an anesthetic because my BMI was almost 50. Not a problem, I didn't need it. I just had a local and was fully awake during the entire procedure. However, I was informed by the nurse that with severe sleep apnia and being 63 and counting, if I did need major surgery I probably couldn't have it. So, I just contacted my Dr. and told him we need to talk! This time, I'm sure I'll get the support I need. Maybe even my husband will join me and have it done, too. So, get the problem taken care of as soon as you can. Do not "weight" or it will just get harder, you will get saggier and your self esteem will get lower. Oh, and if you have to shed the boyfriend along the way, do that, too, if it is necessary to be successful. After all is said and done, you'll find another one! Best of luck... Judy