ALittleMe0914

Morning All! I hope everyone is well. I just wanted some insight from you guys about how you dealt with telling friends/family members about your surgery. I have two younger brothers. One of them is in the military and was home on leave this weekend. I am scheduled for surgery on 9/14 but hadn't told him yet. I waited until I saw him in person over the weekend and told him about the surgery. His reaction was unexpected and I'm letting it get to me, which I probably shouldn't. He told me that he feels like me getting surgery is a "cop out" and the "easy way out" and that if I set my mind to it, I could lose the weight on my own. He was heavier as a child, but lost 60 lbs before he enlisted, so he thinks since he did it, I can do it. (mind you, I have way more than 60lbs to lose). It was difficult to hear for me, because I have tried SO MANY TIMES to lose weight on my own and I always end up heavier than I was before. It's been a downward spiral for me and the simple act of making the decision to have surgery wasn't easy for me, never mind the surgery itself. And I know that it's not easy or the "easy way out", but I guess I just to offense to his reaction. Did you guys ever run into someone's negative opinion about your surgery? And how did you let it roll off your shoulder?

I start my pre-op in a week and a half, and mine is not full liquids. I have to have 2 Meal Replacement shakes (I'm also doing Premier Protein), one small meal, and I am allowed 2 Snacks which can either be another shake or a fruit/vegetable (off of my surgeons approved list). I can also have a frozen meal as a small meal off of an approved list as well. I have an entire packet of things I can and can't have with all of the nutrition info, that I was given in my most recent nutrition group. Did your surgeon give you a preop diet to follow?

We have the same date

Thank you so much for these words! I too, have kept mostly quiet about it. My best friend, fiance', and immediate family know, and that's it. Ultimately, his opinion doesn't make me question my decision at all. But he's one of the closest people in the world to me, and I just want his support more than anything else. He definitely has no clue about the struggle. He lost his weight as a 17 year old boy, and he's now been active military for years so he has been able to maintain a healthy weight because he'll be unemployed if he doesn't. He has no idea. I WISH I only had 60 lbs to lose. And the part that I think made me take so much offense is that he knows that I have tried so hard to lose the weight. I have only had temporary success with Weight Watchers (after joining for my 10th time), and I got down to around 169lbs. But as soon as I wasn't counting every point or calorie, I found myself where I was when I met with the surgeon, at 268 lbs. It's the most AWFUL feeling in the world. So you are right, this is our best chance at a long, happy, healthy life. After taking a day to sleep on it, I am not going to argue with him or be upset, I think I will let my journey speak for itself.

@theantichick Thank you so much for this! I just read some more of your blog. I LOVE it! I hope your pre-op diet is going okay!

@AvaFern thank you for your words! You definitely put a different perspective on it, but I couldn't agree with you more. Thank you all for your words! Ultimately, I know this decision is right for me, and I didn't made it lightly and I know it's not going to always be an easy road. But at the end of it, if I feel better about me, and I am healthy and happy, I guess it doesn't really matter what any one else thinks.

@@walkermy I can't tell you enough, how much I relate to this! So many people that I have shared with, have said the same to me, "You have done it before, why not do it again", and it's because in reality, I have FAILED every time because when I first weighed in with my surgeon, I was once again ...... the heaviest I have ever been. Best of luck on your surgery!

@jenjenp I think a lot of it depends on whether your self pay or using insurance and what their requirements are. I had my first visit on 05/27/16. During my first visit I weighed in, did bloodwork, met with a nutritionist and then met with psych. Then I met with a "medical" doctor, and we went over everything and decided my best bet was to meet with the surgeon. I met with the surgeon on 06/13 and we scheduled my surgery that day for 09/14. They submitted to my insurance and I had an approval within a week or so. I have a few appointments in between for an upper GI, more bloodwork, and a clearance from pulmonary and cardiology. I have one last appointment with the surgeon on 9/6 and then I jump on the loser's bench. From what I have learned and seen, every doctor and every person seems to have a journey that is a little bit different! Best of luck !

@Irisdupree@katiecem I am doing the same, eating less than 50g of carbs per day, and also tracking on my fitness pal, and trying to add in some light exercise to start. I am scheduled for surgery on 09/14 but I have lost 10lbs pre-op, and I'm feeling pretty great! I guess it's always good to start early

@ithacastrong we have the same date! what a great birthday present to yourself!

@@cheneisew @finding_onederland it's weird because my surgeon didn't give me a full liquid diet, (I'm not complaining) LOL but I will have two weeks of 2 small meals with one Meal Replacement shake, and then all liquids 48 hours before. Are you guys getting nervous? I go from crazy excitement to a ball of nerves!

@Heidijenn HI! I can relate to the way that you are feeling here. I first started looking into WLS about 3 years ago, and I completed all of the necessary pre-op appointments. During the time that I was going to the appointments, I started to get really cold feet. I mean, they were freezing, I was so unsure of it - ALL because I couldn't grasp the idea of having to give up my favorite foods, not drink soda, not drink while eating etc. Eventually, I backed out of the process and said I was going to "do it on my own". But if I am being honest with you, making that decision, was just me losing sight of what is actually important. Here I am, 3 years later, 45 lbs heavier, and scheduled to get Sleeved on 09/14. I CANT stress to you enough, how much I WISH EVERYDAY, that I had just had the will power and the common sense to go through with this 3 years ago. I can't help but keep wondering where I would be today. So - with all of that said. I think you need to decide what is more important, you and your health, or what's inside the pizza box. What I did to make myself feel better, was sit down and write myself a letter. It was my pre-op self, talking to my post-op self, reminding me why I chose the surgery. Why I chose my health over food. I told myself all of the things that I can't do that I want to because of my weight. I will open it again and read it when I am post op and freaking out. Maybe that will help you. Best of luck no matter what you choose! xx

@ I asked my surgeon this very question! I have almost tapered off drinking completely but I like to enjoy a drink now and again. I have a wedding 3 weeks pre-op, and it's open bar so I wanted to be sure ahead of time before I did anything I shouldn't! He told me that as long as I'm not doing it during my "pre-op" diet, and not doing it consistently, I should be fine. But he did say no alcohol what-so-ever during the 14 day pre-op diet. I know every surgeon is different, but that's the answer I got if it helps! Best of luck!

@@cheneisew we are going the same day! Let's try to stay in touch! I am so excited to start this journey too. I feel like it's so close, yet so far away!