vucarre

<br />I met my boyfriend mid process... a perfect situation where I might want to hide what I was doing... But this is how I looked at it.. and the outcome, take it as you will. I was completely honest and upfront about my procedure, where I was in the process and why I was having the surgery. Just as I have been with EVERYONE I expected support from or wanted support from. <br /><br />I feel that I have spent so much of my life lying to myself about my weight issue, that it was time to make a WHOLE LIFE change.. be honest and upfront, and most of all be proud that I was making a change to better myself.<br /><br />My boyfriend (aside from my best friend and mother) has been my biggest support person, taking time off from work, offering to help with anything I might need. Telling me how PROUD he is that I am doing this for myself, and my daughter, and even making some changes in his own habits.<br /><br />These women your expecting to jump in and help deserve honesty.. think about how betrayed they might feel in 3 months when you come clean? This is just my take on it, be open and honest and your going to get more long term solid support than if you hide and lie.<br /><br />Good Luck to you!<br /><br /><br />

Thanks for responding. I have no intention of lying about the surgery. I just dont want to say what it is at this point. I plan to tell them I am having a procedure. One friend will probably ask what type of surgery. I just want to just say I am having a procedure without going into detail at this point. But, they are my friends and I have not intention of lying. If she presses, I will just tell her I dont want to talk about it now. Sometime after the surgery, I will feel more comfortable telling people. Again, thanks!!!!

Vu

Yes, this helps alot! Thank you!!!

1) In general, how difficult is it to take pills? I have a few things I have to take that do not come in liquid/chewable form. How do you handle swallowing meds during recovery and after? You can crush them as long as they aren't time release. If they are time release I would speak to the doctor who prescribed them and let them know what's going on.

2) After the healing process, how does the band feel? Or can you feel it? I'm 2 months out today and for the most part completely healed, I do not feel my port it's really deep. Sometimes my port scar gets a little sore still but that's normal.

3) How long before you got your first fill? Thanks in advance!!! Mine took 7 weeks (should of been 6 but I went on vacation and my surgeon didn't want to give me my first fill right before going away)

4) After surgery, how long before you felt well enough to start exercising moderately? I was out walking around the block within days. Most surgeons say 6 weeks for anything more.

5) Has anyone had mild-to moderate acid reflux that is controlled with meds before the band? And, how is the acid reflux after the band? Is it better or worse? I was put on an RX after my endo to help control my acid reflux, since being banded I haven't had any acid reflux.

6)I have seen on a lot of posts that after the band, there is less hunger. I actually am never hungry because I typically eat before I get hungry. So, after the band, are you not thinking about food or does the lasting feeling of fullness really diminish the hunger? Are you chomping at the bit for the next meal, or do you kind of forget about eating until all of a sudden you realize you need to eat? Right after being banded I had to force myself to eat because honestly I wasn't hungry at all. As I started to heal more I listened to my body and it told me when I was hungry. I only have 1 fill and I am not at my sweet spot yet but when you are you should be staying full for a good amount of time between small meals.

7Because eating is so tied to my emotions, and once I am no longer living to eat, I just wonder if I will pic up other compulsive behavior? Have any of you started doing other destructive things to replace the emotional salve of eating.) I honestly have not but I do suggest that if you do maybe seeing a doctor about it wouldn't be a bad idea.

Hope I helped and good luck!!!

I am preparing for my June 20th surgery date and for my two week liquid diet which starts on June 6th. From what I've seen my surgeon is pretty stricts about the pre- op diet and the post- op diet. For two weeks before my surgery I can have Meal Replacement beverages (up to 6 per day), Water (with crystal light), tea, sugar free Jello, and sugar free popsicles. The problem is that it's all sweet except the broth and broth is pretty repulsive. I'm trying to boil it with some fresh herbs to see if I can stand to drink it that way but so far no luck! Please don't get me wrong, I am no complaining, I just need some strategies to help me be successful for the 2 week pre- op diet and the 2 week post- op liquid diet. Thanks!

You may want to try making stock/broth yourself. Make a large batch and freeze in single serving sizes. You can find a million recipes online. Stay away from any recipes to use bouillon or granules.

Thank you for all your suggestions. These are really helpful.

"I'm having an elective procedure that will put me out of commission for a while. At this point, I'm really not comfortable discussing it. Just know that I'll be fine and will tell you all about it when I feel more comfortable. In the mean time, I could really use your help with________________. Thank you so much for understanding."

Good Luck.

Wow, this is really good. Thank you!!!!

^{Having moved over seas, I have new friends here. I consider them good friends but they dont know about my life long battle w/ my weight. I dont want to tell them about the lapband until sometime after surgery. It is not a "none of your biz thing." I just dont want to go into detail at this point. I needto tell them I am having a procedure. Because I will miss karate for 2 weeks & will need help with school pic up. What do I say if they pry?}

Thank you guys so much for answer my slew of questions. I am feel even better about things knowing I have such a great support group here!!! Thanks and enjoy the rest to the weekend!!!

Lapband sched May 19. And, I have a few questions:

1) In general, how difficult is it to take pills? I have a few things I have to take that do not come in liquid/chewable form. How do you handle swallowing meds during recovery and after?

I have always been able to take my medicine.

2) After the healing process, how does the band feel? Or can you feel it?

Can't feel it at all.

3) How long before you got your first fill? Thanks in advance!!!

4-5 weeks

4) After surgery, how long before you felt well enough to start exercising moderately?

Day 4 started back at the gym (treadmill, no incline, slow speed)

5) Has anyone had mild-to moderate acid reflux that is controlled with meds before the band? And, how is the acid reflux after the band? Is it better or worse?

I had milk reflux, turned out I had a small Hernia which the surgeon fixed.

6)I have seen on a lot of posts that after the band, there is less hunger. I actually am never hungry because I typically eat before I get hungry. So, after the band, are you not thinking about food or does the lasting feeling of fullness really diminish the hunger? Are you chomping at the bit for the next meal, or do you kind of forget about eating until all of a sudden you realize you need to eat?

The band did'nt really help me until about my 5 month. By that I mean I did not get any restriction; took about 6 fills. I bought a good digital food scale and measured all my food. When it's was gone I stopped eating; no seconds. Thus the bandster hell; only eating small portions even though you are still hungry. Now that I have restriction I can go 4.5-5 hours without being hungry. It's important to really understand when you are truely hungry vs moderatly peckish and or bored. For example at work they often have meetings were they serve food. There are often left overs. I will walk to the coffee station and the Cookies are looking me in the eye. I ask myself are you hungry or do you just know Cookies taste good? I have lunch about 12:30 on the drive to the gym I have a Ready To Drink

Protein shake at 6:15, leave gym at 8, eat dinner about 8:30. I will say by 8:30 I am pretty hungry but that is 8 hours.

7Because eating is so tied to my emotions, and once I am no longer living to eat, I just wonder if I will pic up other compulsive behavior? Have any of you started doing other destructive things to replace the emotional salve of eating.)

I don't think I would call myself a gym rat but I do exercise an hour a day 7 days a week. I tell myself if I want to eat dinner I have to go to the gym and or go for an hours walk. I always want to eat dinner. I also don't have trouble sleeping.

Wow, thanks DC!!! Great answers!!!

Lapband sched May 19. And, I have a few questions:

1) In general, how difficult is it to take pills? I have a few things I have to take that do not come in liquid/chewable form. How do you handle swallowing meds during recovery and after?

2) After the healing process, how does the band feel? Or can you feel it?

3) How long before you got your first fill? Thanks in advance!!!

4) After surgery, how long before you felt well enough to start exercising moderately?

5) Has anyone had mild-to moderate acid reflux that is controlled with meds before the band? And, how is the acid reflux after the band? Is it better or worse?

6)I have seen on a lot of posts that after the band, there is less hunger. I actually am never hungry because I typically eat before I get hungry. So, after the band, are you not thinking about food or does the lasting feeling of fullness really diminish the hunger? Are you chomping at the bit for the next meal, or do you kind of forget about eating until all of a sudden you realize you need to eat?

7Because eating is so tied to my emotions, and once I am no longer living to eat, I just wonder if I will pic up other compulsive behavior? Have any of you started doing other destructive things to replace the emotional salve of eating.)

Thanks a bunch!!!

Congratulations!!! Best wishes and keep us posted!! Hugz

Hello!

I'm getting my band May 19. Excited but a little nervous. It surreal. I have waited so long, two years as I was trying other approaches, though, I really just wanted the band. Now, it is here and it is like wow. It is really starting to sink in. I need go back and start re reading all the notes and advice I have been collect from everyone who has gone before me. It cannot come son enough!!!

Vu!!!

Oh I am SO happy to hear that!!!! What changed his mind? It helps so much (mentally) to have your spouse's support! I never heard of the Swedish Band-what is it?

Good Luck to you and please continue to keep us posted!!

_____________________

I had trouble with the ticker thing too - but you need to copy and paste the entire box. If the first box doesn't work then try copying and pasting the second option.

Oh, btw, NJG, did you tell your husband yet? How did it go? Oh, and the Swedish band is just one the main 3 band brands. I think outside the states the swedish band is more widely known. I think it was actually one of the first bands.

Oh I am SO happy to hear that!!!! What changed his mind? It helps so much (mentally) to have your spouse's support! I never heard of the Swedish Band-what is it?

Good Luck to you and please continue to keep us posted!!

_____________________

I had trouble with the ticker thing too - but you need to copy and paste the entire box. If the first box doesn't work then try copying and pasting the second option.

I think I got my ticker to work. Yes, that is what I did, I tried the 2nd option and that seemed to work.

For the last month everytime I brought it up he would just get annoyed and acting as if I was crazy for even thinking about doing it. Then he asked a friend of ours who is in the medical profession what he thought about it, whose wife is also considering it. He basically said, "it is not so much a question of if they get, it is more of when." That's what the friend said he told my husband. My husband and I had not been able to discuss it because of hectic schedules or my daughter being around. So, he asked me to send him an email telling him why I wanted the surgery. Initially, I thought, I am not your secretary I am not sending a memo. Then I thought you know, what, I want the surgery so I will send the memo if that is what it will take. So, I just poured my heart about how tired I am of killing myself on diets and lose weight only to gain it back with a vengeance. This has been going on since I was in 3rd grade. I am 47 and I dont want to spend the rest of my life doing this. My mother died of cancer at 60. If, I only have 13 years left, I want to spend it at 135 pounds.

That seemed to have cinched it. So, I paid my $1000 deposit today. Surgery is the 19th.

Ok, on to the next hurdle. We moved to S. Africa almost 3 years ago. My friend who is also considering the band lives her also and we are college friends and since we have moved here, our husbands have bonded as well. I also have a few really good friends I have made here. But, I have only known them since I have been here and i am not sure I want to tell them. The reason being, I know they will both say, you dont need that. I know that is what they will say. But, they dont know my full weight history. They do not know of my life long struggle. I dont want to go into all of that. I want to put all that behind me. But, we take karate together and I will miss two weeks of classes. So, I will need to tell them, I am have a procedure. One for sure will ask me what? So, I need a way to just say a non invasive procedure that will cause me to miss 4 classes. It is a smallish thing. I will tell them eventually.

Thanks for the instructions. I think I did it. But, I cannot see, just the script. Should I be able to see my tracker?

I am not sure what my husbands actual reason's for not wanting me to get the surgery. He was citing safety. But, I suspect there is more to it than that. Though, I am not sure what it is. But, as long as he agreed. After the surgery, I will try to explore what the real issues are/were. Thank you for the support!!!

Vu

I am thrilled my husband has finally decided to support me on this. I am very excited and nervous. My surgery is scheduled for May 19th. I will be getting the Swedish band here in South Africa. Since, I will be living here for the next several years, I thought it would be best to have it done here.

I cannot wait to get this done. My BMI is 34 and I have co morbidities. I have gained the last 20 pounds pretty rapidly and though I have been this weight before, this time I am feeling the strain of carry so much extra weight. My back is killing me, I can barely do the moves in my karate class or hold positions, my feet hurt and I cannot bare to look at myself in the mirror. I dont even want to take a before picture. I am so uncomfortable.

I cannot figure out how to do the ticker. Can someone point me to instructions on how to do that?

Thanks!!!

Vu

Yes, the hard part is being vulnerable. Having to admit that I cannot do it alone and having to say those words to someone is really hard. Out of respect, having to ask for permission/support from one's spouse can be daunting especially when the spouse has no idea what it is like being a compulsive eater and food addict who needs surgical intervention. But, this is just one small step to get us where we need to be. Good luck!!!

Sadly, I have nothing to offer you NJG. I am in the same boat as you. I have a tentative appointment for the surgery here in South Africa May 19th. (It is much easier to get an appointment here as there are so fewer bariatric surgeries and insurance does not cover it at all. So, there is no red tape. It only costs about $10,000 here.) My husband still has not consented. I will be so angry if I lose that slot. I have wanted this surgery for 2 years. He convinced me not to get the surgery two years ago and I did manage to lose half the weight I needed to lose. Then I gained it back. Then, I lost half the weight a second time last year and have of course gained it back and then some. I am tired of this weight roller coaster and I want to get the surgery. But, he gets annoyed every time I bring it up.

He knows I have this tentative date scheduled. I am really annoyed. He let is 15 year old daughter get a breast reduction, which I didnt agree with at that age, but I did not give an opinion as it was really none of my business. But, I really don't understand. First, he said he was concerned about the safety and that I could die. But, I think that is bs. When his 15 year old decided she wanted surgery it was scheduled the next week. He didnt even bother to check to see if our insurance would cover it before hand, that's how fast it was. They of course denied the claim saying she needed to lose weight. By then she had already had the surgery and we had already paid for it. When I brought his up, after I told him how much safer it is than other forms of bariatric surgery, though there are risks with every surgery --- especially one as invasive as breast reduction. Then he changed his tune to I will have a foreign object in my body.

Now, he is saying, 'after you lose the weight, then what?' I guess he is trying to say after you lose the weight, he doesnt think I will be happy. We have little time to talk about it at length recently because he has been working so much. He wanted to go with me to see the doctor but then he cancelled because of work. He is working of a few really big projects so he is at work until well after I go to sleep and he leaves at 6:30 a.m. to drop my daughter at school on his way to work so we dont get a chance to really talk about it. I just really dont know what to do. I dont want to say. I am having the surgery with or without your support. I really dont want to do that. But, it seems like my only choice. Any advice?

I was banded two weeks ago with a BMI of about 35. I had gained and lost the same 30 to 35 pounds twice in the past four years and I finally decided the yo-yo-ing was probably harming my body more than staying heavy. Plus, I could never break past a certain weight barrier.

I'm a self-pay who hasn't regretted it at all. It is certainly no magic pill - nothing is - but I have been able to go back to my old workout routine and the weight is slowiy coming off. I can't wait until I can finally start getting fills in a couple of weeks to increase restriction. I have some now, but I know that may change as I continue to heal from surgery. So I am looking at the pre-fill period as a time to relearn how to eat and to use the healthy habits I learned when I lost weight before.

Good luck!

Hi CTMom,

Thank for responding. So, the doctor did not have a problem placing your band though you did not meet the 35 BMI criteria?

Again, thank you for sharing! Vu

i was banded at a bmi of 32 1/7.11 by dr ortiz in Mexico. it's painful and not a decision to take lightly, but so far i have lost 15 lbs. i highly recommend dr ortiz at the Obesity Control Center. i was self pay for $7000. i paid $1000 extra to have the needle micro surgery so i dont' have any visible scars so i can wear my bikini!

Hi Bowe6061,

Thank for responding. So, the doctor did not have a problem placing your band though you did not meet the 35 BMI criteria?

Again, thank you for sharing! Vu

Hi DRP,

Thank for responding. So, the doctor did not have a problem placing your band thought you did not meet the 35 BMI criteria?

Again, thank you for sharing! Vu

My BMI is 33 and I am self pay. My weight has been yo-yo'ing up and down now for about 20 years. Every time I gain weight I weigh more than the last starting weight. I'm just fed up with it all and need something that I will stick with. I figure once I get banded then I'm banded for life and I have to stick with it. I don't have a delusions of this being a magic bullet but I'm thinking of it as my own little enforcer...one that I can't get rid of!

I am being banded by Dr. Curry in Cincinnati on Feb 1st. Good luck to you.

My BMI is only 32 at this point. I was at 35 two years ago. My husband talked me out of the surgery and I went to Duke Weight Loss center for 2 months and I managed to lose 30 pounds. I kept if off for about a year, but never reaching my goal of losing 60 pounds. Lasy year 2010, I started CEAHOW (which is like overeaters anonymous) and again, lost 30 pounds but never reaching my goal. I want to have the surgery now because I know this disease is progressive and I really dont want to wait until my bmi is 35 again. I would like to avoid the problems I have at that weight, which are lower back pain, and slight incontinence along with the problems I currently have, which are, high blood pressure and acid reflux. My insurance will not cover it so I am going to pay myself. Here in South Africa, it is only about $10,000.

So, I am hoping I am not the only one in this boat!!

My BMI is only 32 at this point. I was at 35 two years ago. My husband talked me out of the surgery and I went to Duke Weight Loss center for 2 months and I managed to lose 30 pounds. I kept if off for about a year, but never reaching my goal of losing 60 pounds. Lasy year 2010, I started CEAHOW (which is like overeaters anonymous) and again, lost 30 pounds but never reaching my goal. I want to have the surgery now because I know this disease is progressive and I really dont want to wait until my bmi is 35 again. I would like to avoid the problems I have at that weight, which are lower back pain, and slight incontinence along with the problems I currently have, which are, high blood pressure and acid reflux. My insurance will not cover it so I am going to pay myself. Here in South Africa, it is only about $10,000.

So, I am hoping I am not the only one in this boat!!