SuperSparkly72

Welcome! And congrats for making it this far. This is a wonderful site for support and information and I encourage you to take full advantage of the wealth of wisdom the vets here have to offer. It's been invaluable for me. Invest in warm socks! . . . and blankets . . . My surgery was in January and I have never been so happy to see summer in my life. I was so cold! And the more weight you lose, the colder you'll be. Oh, and invest in a seat cushion of some sort! Because the flatter your bum gets, the harder the chairs get. At least until you learn how to sit on an uncushioned backside. Best of luck on your journey.

My NUT recommends Nature Valley Protein bars. If you look at the macros, the calories and carbs are much lower than most of the more commercial bars. . . . and they cost a lot less. Even less expensive, I buy the store brand that has the same nutrient stats. However, my NUT says only one a day. I always have one in my purse in case I'm out and about without a chance for real food.

What temperature is your Water? I can only drink room temp., otherwise, it makes my stomach hurt. In the beginning, I tolerated hot beverages better than anything else so I lived on hot tea. Using a straw helped me get more liquids in than straight up drinking but I know there is some controversy about that topic so proceed with caution if you go that route. I would also recommend that you contact your medical team about the pain just to rule out any other more serious problems.

So exciting! Congrats on making it this far.

You are very welcome. Keep us posted on how you are doing. Take each day one moment at a time. Before you know it, you'll find your balance again.

I'm glad to hear that the two of you are finally talking. It's hard when one partner goes all quiet on you. There are a lot of SOs who struggle with the risk of surgery and it takes a very secure person not to have doubts about how he will relate to the new you once you start losing weight and feeling better. It's a big change for everyone in a household. I remember those last few weeks before my surgery. I was a wreck. Excited, anxious . . . hungry from my 2-week liquid diet which made me grumpy. You are in a very emotional and vulnerable state. The key for your relationship is honest, open communication. Your fiancee needs to know what to expect from you (As in "Hey, babe, I'm a bundle of emotions, it's going to last for a few months but it will get better"). And you need to be straight up about what you need from him. The good news is, it sounds like the two of you have a solid relationship and that when he isn't in a funk, he's a pretty good guy. Hang in there. I agree with LisaMergs, now is not the time for you to be making any more life-altering decisions. Get through your surgery, the healing and the hormone dump and then re-evaluate where you are in life. There are a lot of changes ahead and you don't want to make an emotionally driven decision that you might regret six months from now. You've got time. This is your life and you are in charge of how it plays out. Take a deep breath and be really good to yourself. Wishing you all the best.

So, I was reading another thread this morning on alcohol - a charming topic that has since delightfully devolved into communion wine in dixie cups - when someone brought up drinking coke with pop rocks and I nearly spit my Protein shake all over my computer screen. This is literally the conversation I had with my husband last night: Hubby: Hey, I found the pop rocks you gave me for Christmas. Can I still cash them in? (22 years of marriage and always looking for new romantic . . . adventures. Look it up.) Me: No. You know I don’t eat sugar anymore. I’m pretty sure I warned you that you had to use them before I had my surgery in January. Hubby: Dang. It was a three pack too. Are you sure I can’t cash them in anyway? Just without the pop rocks? Me: It’s not as much fun without the pop rocks. Hubby: sad puppy face Me: Fine. If you can find sugar free pop rocks, we’ll talk. Hubby: (not even FIVE MINUTES later) Good news! Amazon sells sugar-free pop rocks . . . in a 24 pack! Don’t worry. I would never subject my delicate pouch to pop rocks, even sugar-free. Poor Hubby got his hopes up for nothing. Stupid Amazon. Stupid pop rocks. Now I want a coke. Or communion wine in a dixie cup. Instead, I’ll drink my old lady juice: Water with added Fiber and Miralax. 125#s down today! I love my pouch!

Personally, I can't do the moderation thing . . . my carb and sugar addiction is too strong. Carbs and sugar create a craving for more carbs and sugar and I find that I'm always hungry. It took me two weeks to detox from a sugar binge I went on and I was starving most of that time. Once I got the sugar out of my system, I was fine. But I won't touch refined sugar again. Of course, when I say carbs, I'm talking about the empty-calorie processed foods: crackers, chips, bread, etc. Same with sugar: processed white sugar. I get plenty of healthy carbs (and sugar) from Beans, veggies and fruit. I stay away from anything potato because that is another big trigger for me. But that's just me. For some people, the thought of never having something they love is as more of a trigger to binge than actually eating the food itself. You need to figure out what works best for you. Maybe a compromise though? Maybe you tell yourself that you won't touch the stuff during your weight loss phase and then revisit some of your favorites during maintenance. That could curb some of the all or nothing thinking that might be driving you to overeat right now. Good luck with your journey! There are hard days but it is definitely worth the sacrifices we make to become healthy.

OMG! That's hilarious! Can you imagine the bingo night that clerk was thinking of?

You don't sound like a brat at all. You sound like a woman on the precipice of an enormous life change who is trying to figure out a very complex situation. This is a highly emotional time in your life and, I'm sorry to say, after surgery it will continue to be so for several months because on top of the physical changes your body will go through you will also being dealing with a flood of hormones from the rapid weight loss. You're right, you need all of the support and positive energy you can get. Which is not to say that you should walk away from your relationship right now. . . or that you should stay. A few questions: When is your surgery? How long have you and your fiance been together? How long has this distance been between the two of you? (Is he usually supportive and this fight atypical?) What do your family and friends think about him and your relationship? Sometimes people outside of situation can offer a different perspective. The two of you need to sit down and really talk. Maybe you could go away for a weekend, maybe with a couple's counselor . . . something that will help you communicate with one another. I know from 21 years of marriage that you can't just ignore a problem and hope that it will somehow fix itself. Congrats on getting your surgery date. I'm sorry your joy is being stifled by your current situation. Stay strong and keep reaching out to people for help. And never apologize for how you feel. Life is rarely as simple as happy or sad; there's just too much going on. We care about you here and I'm wishing you all the best.

In my personal life, I choose to tell people that I had bypass. Professionally, I tell people that I have been on a medically supervised diet for the past year. Unless it is someone I think might benefit from the surgery and then I tell them, too. But that's my personal choice. I'm a blabbermouth who can't keep secrets about herself. And I don't really care about judgy, uptight sorts who might disapprove.

Thank you so much for so articulately sharing what many of the rest of us are feeling but can't quite put into words. Fat-shaming is that last bastion of the bigotted; the one thing people are allowed to show prejudice towards. I hate it. And I work hard at not hating many things. It never ceases to amaze me how differently I am treated now that I am a "normal" size. But, I know the people who have loved me big and small and that is who I choose to focus my energy on. You're right. We're all incredible! Thanks again. And good for you, catching yourself before you went too far down the rabbit hole of self-doubt. Thanks for helping the rest of us.

I agree completely! My one exception to the not telling clients rule is those I know would benefit from the surgery. I answer honestly and leave it open for dialogue if they have questions.

"I've been on a medically supervised diet for over a year now. I guess it's starting to show." That's my go to answer for clients. My co-workers all know; mostly because I'm terrible about keeping my own secrets. But I work with a bunch of affirming, touchy-feely folks, so they've been supportive. If they weren't, I still wouldn't care. One of the best gifts I ever gave myself was to realize that while not everyone can appreciate the magnificence that is me, there are plenty of people who do and I choose to focus my energy on those relationships rather than trying to win anyone else's approval.

I'm a Cincinnati girl.

LOL!!!!! No! But I'm telling you right now, no more pop rocks for him until I get over the pie!

Ick. meat. I used to love it. Now, (7 months) I can have a little of a rare steak and that's about it. eggs, yogurt, cheese, nuts and Protein shakes have been my go to. But this weekend I made a foray into the great unknown and made my very first ever tofu dishes! Tofu parmesan and tofu pumpkin pie. Admittedly, the pie was better but the parmesan was actually pretty good. Even hubby, who never has leftovers, ate it again the next day. He also ate the rest of my pie but I'm trying to forgive him. This weekend, I'm going to try tofu bbq and maybe some tofu tacos. Or Tempeh. I hear that's good in tacos. Pinterest, here I come!

Don't you look awesome! Thank you for sharing. It's an inspiration to see such wonderful, long-term success. Congrats!

The early days are hard. . . and five weeks = early days. You're right. You are being flooded with hormones on top of recovering from major surgery and trying to adjust to an entirely new way of living life. I was a wreck the first 2 months or so. The good news is that it DOES get better. For me, getting back on my anti-depressant was a lifesaver but I was on one before surgery so I knew I needed it. The relationship part can be tricky. If you can find a time when you are feeling (relatively) calm to sit down and talk to the important people in your life and explain what is happening, assure them that this is not a permanent state of being and that your sweet, wonderful self will return in due time, hopefully, they can find it in their hearts to extend you some patience and understanding. Exercise is good for working off excess emotions. So are journaling, music, any creative pursuit or watching a really sad movie with a box of tissue in your lap. Spend time with people who love you, find something to make you laugh, Celebrate every victory (I got a toe ring as a reward for making it to onederland) and do something extra-special nice for yourself just because you can. I'm seven months in, 128lbs down and I can't remember the last time I was this happy with my life. Five weeks in, I never would have thought it possible. You've got this. You'll make through. Sending you warm thoughts. SuperSparkly

Add the fun . . . along with your pop rocks, get some cool whip, bungee cord and throw some condoms into the mix and then stand at the check out with a big ole smile on your face!

#1: Stop watching those YouTube videos! If you go looking for negativity, you'll find it and stress yourself out needlessly. #2: Find something positive to focus on. (Obvious, I know). There are tons of posts on this site alone that are inspiring. One of my favorites is What Was Your Final "straw That Broke The Camels Back" Sorry, I don't know how to make it a link for you to go directly to, but you can search for it. Before my surgery, it was a reminder of all of the reasons why I chose to make such drastic changes to my body. There are others about achieving goals and NSVs that are so encouraging and hopeful. They can all remind you of the wonderful life you have to look forward to. #3: I know the liquid diet is hard. But it doesn't last forever. And when you get tempted or feel overwhelmed, refer back to #2. Remember why this decision was so important for you to make. #4: Call a friend, go for a walk, make a list of all of the rewards you want to give yourself when you reach certain milestones, do something nice for yourself today. You're almost there. You can do this. And you are worth it. Write those words on post-it notes and cover every available surface of your home, your car, your office . . . the dog if you have one. And good luck! You've got this.

You are definitely not a failure! Your body has been through an enormous trauma and it is going to take some time to adjust. Keep Water or Protein in a cup in your hand at all times. I know there is some controversy about them, but in the beginning, using a straw was the only way I could get enough fluids in. . . . for whatever reason, it was easier for me than straight up drinking. If you go on Pinterest, you can find recipes to flavor your Protein shakes and even add extra protein to them to boost your intake. One sip at a time. You'll make it and it will get better. IMHO, the only way you can fail is if you give up entirely and snarf down a bunch of ice cream, cake, candy, hot dogs, hamburgers . . . yeah, you get my point. Just because your body is a little slow to recover doesn't make you a failure, only human. You can do this. Honest.

1/2 a bikini - the best way to save money on clothes!

Good luck! Have you ever noticed how much nervousness feels like excitement? For the record, I had no nausea and very little gas pain. I walked every chance I got in the hospital which helps with gas . . . and I asked for a second hospital gown to wear like a robe so there was "southern exposure." I hope all goes well for you. Before you know it, the surgery will be over and you'll be on your way to your new life!

Switching some of my veggies for a serving or two of fruit a day is the only way I can get enough calories to maintain my weight loss. One of my NUTS suggested Wheat Thins or crackers to up my calories but I prefer whole natural foods to processed carbs. And while the crackers are a trigger food, my blueberries satisfy me without creating any cravings.