angelburch

I completely understand where you're coming from. Today is my 11th day smoke free. It's really hard, and the patch helps. One of the things that i do, is when the craving hits, I picture it as a wave and I ride the wave all the in, until the craving goes away, and it does. When I went cold-turkey and was smoke-free for 3 1/2 years, I approached it the same way "I can have a cigarette anytime, I'm just going to see how long I can go before I have one". Good luck to you, and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

Today I am smoke free for 10 days (HOORAY :clap2: ). It's not been easy, that's for sure! But I'm really proud of that accomplishment. Last night I went for my very first Yoga class. It's a type of Yoga called "Vinyasa" - or also known as "hot yoga". The room is extremely hot, and you really sweat a lot. It was amazing! I will continue to go, even though I can't do half of the stuff, I know that eventually I will be able to. Everyone in the class (including the extremely skinny, inhumanly flexible young chick) said I did great for my first time. I know that for my exercise, working out at a gym won't work for me, and walking is "OK", but I really believe that this Yoga thing could really turn out to be something extraordinary. Also, saw the psychologist and had a consult with the Nutritionist today, so all my "requirements" by the insurance company have been met, and Ricardo at Dr. J's office said they would be able to submit everything to the Insurance Company tomorrow:clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: !!!!!! It's a good day!

Today I am smoke free for 10 days (HOORAY :clap2: ). It's not been easy, that's for sure! But I'm really proud of that accomplishment. Last night I went for my very first Yoga class. It's a type of Yoga called "Vinyasa" - or also known as "hot yoga". The room is extremely hot, and you really sweat a lot. It was amazing! I will continue to go, even though I can't do half of the stuff, I know that eventually I will be able to. Everyone in the class (including the extremely skinny, inhumanly flexible young chick) said I did great for my first time. I know that for my exercise, working out at a gym won't work for me, and walking is "OK", but I really believe that this Yoga thing could really turn out to be something extraordinary. Also, saw the psychologist and had a consult with the Nutritionist today, so all my "requirements" by the insurance company have been met, and Ricardo at Dr. J's office said they would be able to submit everything to the Insurance Company tomorrow:clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: !!!!!! It's a good day!

Today I have been smoke free for one week! No cheating . . . not even once. I will admit that I feel better. My DH and I went for a walk this morning (with the puppies) and I didn't wheeze as much as I have in the past! One week down and a lifetime to go! I completed my letter to BCBS for my surgery. I will send it to the Doctor's office Monday morning. After that, the only thing left to do is to see the psychologist for my results, and the nutritionist (all at the same time) on Tuesday. Hopefully the Doctor's office will send all my info to the insurance company before Thanksgiving. I hope it only takes a week or two to get approved. If so, then I can have the surgery prior to Christmas. That would be the ultimate Christmas gift! :clap2:

Today I have been smoke free for one week! No cheating . . . not even once. I will admit that I feel better. My DH and I went for a walk this morning (with the puppies) and I didn't wheeze as much as I have in the past! One week down and a lifetime to go! I completed my letter to BCBS for my surgery. I will send it to the Doctor's office Monday morning. After that, the only thing left to do is to see the psychologist for my results, and the nutritionist (all at the same time) on Tuesday. Hopefully the Doctor's office will send all my info to the insurance company before Thanksgiving. I hope it only takes a week or two to get approved. If so, then I can have the surgery prior to Christmas. That would be the ultimate Christmas gift! :clap2:

I am very happy that today is my one week anniversary! No cheating, not once! I love the patches. To smoke or not to smoke is a personal choice. But with all choices, there are consequences. I am the only smoker in my family, and I never smoked in the house, nor would I sit in the "smoking" section of the restaurants. It was MY bad habit, and didn't want others to have to deal with it. Either way, it's no longer an issue. I want this surgery, and in order to have it, I have to be smoke free for two weeks. Some have said "Why quit, they won't know", but I will. I am not about to jeopardize this opportunity.

I got the nicotine patch and started wearing it today. NO CRAVINGS!!!!:clap2: Today has been very easy with no desire to smoke. I just hope that it will continue throughout the next few weeks. My DH sat down with me to eat, and he cut his food up into teeny tiny pieces, and ate very slowly and took his time. He did this with me so he could learn what my eating habits are going to be like. He has read everything I've brought to him, and has asked a lot of questions. He's being very supportive. I see the nutritionist and get the results of my psych eval next Tuesday. I will work on my letter to BCBS this weekend. Hopefully next week, I too will have my paperwork submitted to the insurance compamy.

I got the nicotine patch and started wearing it today. NO CRAVINGS!!!!:clap2: Today has been very easy with no desire to smoke. I just hope that it will continue throughout the next few weeks. My DH sat down with me to eat, and he cut his food up into teeny tiny pieces, and ate very slowly and took his time. He did this with me so he could learn what my eating habits are going to be like. He has read everything I've brought to him, and has asked a lot of questions. He's being very supportive. I see the nutritionist and get the results of my psych eval next Tuesday. I will work on my letter to BCBS this weekend. Hopefully next week, I too will have my paperwork submitted to the insurance compamy.

I'm five days out (smoke free), ane feeling great! I finally got the patch (14mg), and can honestly say that I've had no cravings! My decision to stop was alreay made, just the "when" was decided once the surgeon told me he wouldn't operate without me being smoke free for at least 2 weeks prior to surgery. Smoking slows down the healing process, so that's why he won't operate. I have beaten this once before and I WILL beat this again. I'm the kind of person who has to make HUGE changes at once. Baby steps don't work for me. I'm starting Yoga classes next week, finishing up all my paperwork with the Dr for them to submit to the insurance company. I want to have the surgery the 1st or 2nd week of December. For me, THE WHOLE ENCHILADA works.

Today I had my psych evaluation. They let me out without any meds, so I must have fooled them good . Actually it was a good experience and they said "You have a good and realistic understanding of what is expected before, during and after the surgery". I wonder if they've ever really turned anyone down and said that they weren't psychologically ready for the surgery. Anyway . . as far as smoking goes, it's been tough. I almost cheated today, but made myself picture me skinny. However, the cravings are waking me up 5-6 times during the night, so I contacted the "Quit Assist" program that is offered through our health insurance. Several people at the office have used it and said it's a really great program. So I called and signed up. This evening one of the "Coaches" called me and we talked about my smoking habits in the past, what worked, what didn't. We also talked about things for me to do differently. They are going to send me the nicotine patches for me to use (insurance gives me a deeply discounted rate - $15). In the meantime, I fear I will slip off this cart and buggy :help: . But if I do, I am getting right back on! I am sick and tired of this and once I get free, I will NEVER EVER go back to smoking EVER AGAIN. And yes, you can print this entry and tape it to my door to remind me! Back to the psych eval -- I go back next Tuesday to get my "results", and will also see the nutritionist at the same time (also required by my insurance company). Once all that's done, the only thing left will be to write the letter to the Insurance company. I'm lousy at writing letters, and I dread this one thing most of all!

Today I had my psych evaluation. They let me out without any meds, so I must have fooled them good . Actually it was a good experience and they said "You have a good and realistic understanding of what is expected before, during and after the surgery". I wonder if they've ever really turned anyone down and said that they weren't psychologically ready for the surgery. Anyway . . as far as smoking goes, it's been tough. I almost cheated today, but made myself picture me skinny. However, the cravings are waking me up 5-6 times during the night, so I contacted the "Quit Assist" program that is offered through our health insurance. Several people at the office have used it and said it's a really great program. So I called and signed up. This evening one of the "Coaches" called me and we talked about my smoking habits in the past, what worked, what didn't. We also talked about things for me to do differently. They are going to send me the nicotine patches for me to use (insurance gives me a deeply discounted rate - $15). In the meantime, I fear I will slip off this cart and buggy :help: . But if I do, I am getting right back on! I am sick and tired of this and once I get free, I will NEVER EVER go back to smoking EVER AGAIN. And yes, you can print this entry and tape it to my door to remind me! Back to the psych eval -- I go back next Tuesday to get my "results", and will also see the nutritionist at the same time (also required by my insurance company). Once all that's done, the only thing left will be to write the letter to the Insurance company. I'm lousy at writing letters, and I dread this one thing most of all!

Thanks Mindy -- I was wondering if it would help get me through the first week or two. I used the patch once when they first came out, and you could only get them by prescription (think it was the late 80's or early 90's). Back then, it made me sick. I hope they've improved them since then. I will have my DH pick me up a box on the way home.

I am on my 3rd day of not smoking. I hope to get the band either December or January. I've been journaling about it. I quit for 3 1/2 years, and then just about a year ago I thought "just one couldn't hurt" . . . boy did it. The first time I quit it was cold turkey, this time it's cold turkey again, but man it's harder than the first time. I'm considering the nicotine patch. Today was the hardest, and I found myself sitting out side the 7-Eleven on my home today. However, I stayed in the car, and made myself come home. My Dr won't do the surgery unless I've been smoke free for at least 14 days. This time is for good. Once I get past this initial phase, I will never ever smoke again!

The cravings are hitting really hard. Especially this afternoon. The is by far the hardest it's been. I can't believe how stupid I was to pick up the stupid cigarette, after being smoke free for so long! Stupid stupid stupid! But this is the first step to getting my band. Dr. Jay won't do the surgery unless I am smoke free for at least 14 days, so this is part of it. I figure if I can get through the next 10 days I should be okay. I go for my psych evaluation tomorrow at 1:30, and they called me today at 4pm and I have to say, that when I heard their voice, my heart stopped. I was so afraid that they were wanting to reschedule. All I could think of was if they want to reschedule, I'm going to crawl under my desk and cry. Thankfully, they were just confirming.:clap2: I am really excited about tomorrow! Then I just have the meeting with the nutrionist, and then the only thing that I need to complete before they can send the request to my insurance company is a letter from me. I am really lowsy at writing letters. I will have to look through this website to see if I can find copies of "suggested" letters.

The cravings are hitting really hard. Especially this afternoon. The is by far the hardest it's been. I can't believe how stupid I was to pick up the stupid cigarette, after being smoke free for so long! Stupid stupid stupid! But this is the first step to getting my band. Dr. Jay won't do the surgery unless I am smoke free for at least 14 days, so this is part of it. I figure if I can get through the next 10 days I should be okay. I go for my psych evaluation tomorrow at 1:30, and they called me today at 4pm and I have to say, that when I heard their voice, my heart stopped. I was so afraid that they were wanting to reschedule. All I could think of was if they want to reschedule, I'm going to crawl under my desk and cry. Thankfully, they were just confirming.:clap2: I am really excited about tomorrow! Then I just have the meeting with the nutrionist, and then the only thing that I need to complete before they can send the request to my insurance company is a letter from me. I am really lowsy at writing letters. I will have to look through this website to see if I can find copies of "suggested" letters.

Okay, so far so good. I've had some pretty harsh cravings, but haven't given in. As the craving hits, I just try to pretend that I'm on a surf board, and try to "ride the wave" all the way in. I know that the physical cravings only last 2-4 days, and there after it's all psychological. I quit before (cold turkey), and I can do it again. This is what I get for picking up a cigarette after being smoke free for 3 1/2 yrs. But this is what I must do in order to be banded. Not to mention the fact that it's great for my over all health. My office is offering free workout classes twice a week. At 5:15 on Monday's and Thursdays. I'm going to go. I think it will help me through this. Not to mention it will help me physically. My husband is very patient with me, and is being a huge source of support.

Okay, so far so good. I've had some pretty harsh cravings, but haven't given in. As the craving hits, I just try to pretend that I'm on a surf board, and try to "ride the wave" all the way in. I know that the physical cravings only last 2-4 days, and there after it's all psychological. I quit before (cold turkey), and I can do it again. This is what I get for picking up a cigarette after being smoke free for 3 1/2 yrs. But this is what I must do in order to be banded. Not to mention the fact that it's great for my over all health. My office is offering free workout classes twice a week. At 5:15 on Monday's and Thursdays. I'm going to go. I think it will help me through this. Not to mention it will help me physically. My husband is very patient with me, and is being a huge source of support.

Today is my last day smoking. I find that I am actually looking forward to the day ending so I can start the "non smoking" part. I have only 6 cigarettes left, and once they are gone, that's it. My BF is out of town on business, and I miss having her to talk with about this process. She's working on getting Banded too. However, another lady at my office talked with me about today, and she has an appt with Dr. J next week. She says that since she has decided to do this, it's all she can think about, that she's obsessing about it. I told her I felt the same way. It's like the LBand is the "Holy Grail", and I think about it all the time, and dream about it. I'm sure this is common (I hope), and probably once someone reaches that decision, that's all they can think about.

Today is my last day smoking. I find that I am actually looking forward to the day ending so I can start the "non smoking" part. I have only 6 cigarettes left, and once they are gone, that's it. My BF is out of town on business, and I miss having her to talk with about this process. She's working on getting Banded too. However, another lady at my office talked with me about today, and she has an appt with Dr. J next week. She says that since she has decided to do this, it's all she can think about, that she's obsessing about it. I told her I felt the same way. It's like the LBand is the "Holy Grail", and I think about it all the time, and dream about it. I'm sure this is common (I hope), and probably once someone reaches that decision, that's all they can think about.

As I headed home from work today, I sent my husband a text message that said "Going home to drink!". He sent back "Save me some!" Today was quite stressful, but still very good. Once again, I look forward to Friday. That will be my last smoke day. I have quit smoking in the past (for 3.5 yrs), so I know I can do it. My BF had her psych visit today . . . they let her out, so she must be safe to be around :scared: . I updated my Mom about my journey to Lband Heaven, and she is glad that I have found something that I feel very comfortable with. She is very supportive. What's really weird, is that now that I am on this journey, I find I'm not as hungry as much . . . I wonder if it's normal. I seem to have become more aware of what I am eating (which is good). This should help me with having to make the decisions on what to eat once I have the surgery.

As I headed home from work today, I sent my husband a text message that said "Going home to drink!". He sent back "Save me some!" Today was quite stressful, but still very good. Once again, I look forward to Friday. That will be my last smoke day. I have quit smoking in the past (for 3.5 yrs), so I know I can do it. My BF had her psych visit today . . . they let her out, so she must be safe to be around . I updated my Mom about my journey to Lband Heaven, and she is glad that I have found something that I feel very comfortable with. She is very supportive. What's really weird, is that now that I am on this journey, I find I'm not as hungry as much . . . I wonder if it's normal. I seem to have become more aware of what I am eating (which is good). This should help me with having to make the decisions on what to eat once I have the surgery.

When I got home this evening, my husband greeted me and wanted to know all about my Dr's visit. He asked a lot of questions, and was very happy for me. He has truly come full circle and is back to being my 100% fully supporting husband. He has expressed his fears of me having surgery (of any kind), and we talked about those. I can tell when I look in his eyes that he is truly supportive My anger has gone away since it's had a place to go (this journal), and I hope that I didn't make anyone think that I needed some major psych help. It's just that I have always been the kind of person to hold back on what I truly think and feel with about 95% of the people I come in contact with. I consider myself a very private person when it comes to my feelings and rarely trust anyone enough to be honest with them. However, I do have a terrific support group. My hubby, my BF and her husband (whom I affectionately refer to as my brother-husband), and my two daughters. Those 5 are the only one's I feel completly at ease with when expressing my emotions. So, again, my appt today was great, however I was surprised that their scale said I weight 276 instead of the 282 that mine said this morning. So this evening my hubby and I "reset" our scale. My BMI is 43, and my body fat was 52.5% :omg: . I don't know what is considered a healthy body fat, so I guess I'll have to research that. And yes BF -- we will live a long long time as skinny and HEALTHY BF's!!! Hugs and Kisses.:scared:

When I got home this evening, my husband greeted me and wanted to know all about my Dr's visit. He asked a lot of questions, and was very happy for me. He has truly come full circle and is back to being my 100% fully supporting husband. He has expressed his fears of me having surgery (of any kind), and we talked about those. I can tell when I look in his eyes that he is truly supportive My anger has gone away since it's had a place to go (this journal), and I hope that I didn't make anyone think that I needed some major psych help. It's just that I have always been the kind of person to hold back on what I truly think and feel with about 95% of the people I come in contact with. I consider myself a very private person when it comes to my feelings and rarely trust anyone enough to be honest with them. However, I do have a terrific support group. My hubby, my BF and her husband (whom I affectionately refer to as my brother-husband), and my two daughters. Those 5 are the only one's I feel completly at ease with when expressing my emotions. So, again, my appt today was great, however I was surprised that their scale said I weight 276 instead of the 282 that mine said this morning. So this evening my hubby and I "reset" our scale. My BMI is 43, and my body fat was 52.5% :omg: . I don't know what is considered a healthy body fat, so I guess I'll have to research that. And yes BF -- we will live a long long time as skinny and HEALTHY BF's!!! Hugs and Kisses.

I saw the Intern at Dr. Jay's office today. She was wonderful! She said I was an excellent candidate. The only thing is that I must quit smoking -- which is cool. I knew I'd have to do that. I quit for 3.5 yrs and then for some stupid reason picked it back up again. So this Friday 11/10 will be my last day smoking. I know it will be hard (been there, done that), but at least I know what to expect. I'm sure I'll be journaling a lot during that time. I've already called and set the appt for my psych and nutritionist. So it looks like it's coming along! Now I just have to write a letter to the insurance company, and I'm not very good at that, so for me, that will be the hardest part.

I saw the Intern at Dr. Jay's office today. She was wonderful! She said I was an excellent candidate. The only thing is that I must quit smoking -- which is cool. I knew I'd have to do that. I quit for 3.5 yrs and then for some stupid reason picked it back up again. So this Friday 11/10 will be my last day smoking. I know it will be hard (been there, done that), but at least I know what to expect. I'm sure I'll be journaling a lot during that time. I've already called and set the appt for my psych and nutritionist. So it looks like it's coming along! Now I just have to write a letter to the insurance company, and I'm not very good at that, so for me, that will be the hardest part.