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Everything posted by auroradawn
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Anyone else scheduled for May 12 with Dr. Illan?
auroradawn replied to auroradawn's topic in Mexico & Self-Pay Weight Loss Surgery
Will do! Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App -
Anyone else scheduled for May 12 with Dr. Illan?
auroradawn posted a topic in Mexico & Self-Pay Weight Loss Surgery
I'm excited but it feels so far away lol -
Anyone not telling anyone about their surgery?
auroradawn replied to taramarie523's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
I read your blog and find it very inspiring! I bookmarked it so hopefully I'll catch new posts as you write more. Way to go!! I'm happy for you. It has me thinking of ways to record/share/monitor my own journey. Thank you!!! -
Does anyone else feel this way: What if it doesn't work for me?
auroradawn posted a topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
First time posting here, but I've been lurking for awhile. I'm self-pay and scheduled with Dr. Illan in Mexico for May 12. Feeling very calm and not nervous about the surgery itself...but I worry that I'll be the one this doesn't work for. Has anyone else felt that way?? About me 5'2", 47 years old, 295 pounds. I've been overweight since I was maybe 10 or so. Childhood pictures show a normal-sized child, but I don't remember not being fat. I was over 200 in high school, probably 250 or so before/after my two pregnancies, and been 275-295 for the last 15-20 years. That's were my weight seems to want to be; on the one hand, I can pretty much eat whatever, and I don't go up anymore; but on the other hand, it's pretty impossible to lose anything, and it always resettles in the 275-295 range. I've been a vegan/vegetarian for over 10 years (first 5 vegan, now vegetarian). Before that I did Atkins and lost 80 pounds (but was also pretty much starving myself...it was Atkins in name only). Since then, I've done WW, superfood diets, blah blah blah. You know the drill. I have Hashimoto's, which I'm sure plays a role in all this (I was diagnosed at hypothyroid about 16 years ago, and Hashi's about 5 years ago). I am treated properly for my thyroid and it is technically right where it should be. I'm excited about having the sleeve because I feel like, from everything I've read, this will be the tool that gets me where I want to be. I love to eat healthy foods (though I eat bad ones, too, for sure), and wish I could be more active without the pain, so in theory this should all work for me. But...I can't picture it. I don't know what it's like to be a healthy weight. What if my body can't do that, no matter how hard I try (so far it hasn't, afterall!). I feel like this is my last chance, so what if it doesn't work? These are my worries :/ I'll be the one it doesn't work for... My goals are really just to be healthier, to avoid diabetes (I'm pre-diabetic now) and heart disease, to be able to go backpacking and walking and do all the things I want to do. I have a vague idea that I'll be able to fit into smaller clothes, and that would be fun (I've never in my life bought something that was actually cool or fun to wear or fashionable). I hope to lose a lot of weight, and I'm 100% willing to do the work. But....I've done the work before and been frustrated when nothing happens. So that is my worry and my fear. Has anyone else ever felt that way? Thank you in advance for taking the time to read my rambles... -
Anyone not telling anyone about their surgery?
auroradawn replied to taramarie523's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
I'm not sure we are supposed to share links, but if you google "downforwardthru blogger" it will come up. There's only one post right now -
Anyone not telling anyone about their surgery?
auroradawn replied to taramarie523's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
I was researching for a year (I'm self-paying in Mexico) and didn't tell a single living soul. I made the leap and then was approved on April 1 (just 11 days ago). At first I didn't want to tell anyone at all, at least not until after it was all over, maybe not until people started noticing. But I had to tell my kid because she lives with me. She might wonder where Mom went for five days. Then I had to tell my ex husband (kid's dad), because I couldn't really leave her alone for five days without telling him. That's all I told that first weekend, those two. They were both very supportive, ex even asking if he should go with me as a support person. (Even the nicest, most supportive ex husband shouldn't have to do that, I told him.) Emboldened, I told my boss on the following Monday. It was difficult to get the words out, but she was so accepting and told me my other coworkers would be to. So then I told them, the ones I'm closest to, and they are. Which is nice, because I have lunch with them every single day, and they are sure to notice that I'm on a liquid and mushy food diet for three months! Then I told my two best friends. Who love me and support me, which I never really doubted. Then I wrote an email and told the rest of my extended family here in Washington. They support me, too. I was definitely not going to tell my mom, though; she'd just worry. (Plus I was quite sure I'd feel like I was 10 and about to get scolded.) But two days ago I told my mom, because I felt guilty not telling her. And she surprised me (though, not really) by being supportive as well. (Probably worried. But supportive.) In about 10 days I've gone from telling no one, to telling everyone. Last night I started a blog, telling the world, and I plan to chronicle the whole thing. I know that's not for everyone, but for ME, it's right. I realized my not telling came from a place of shame that I'd somehow failed doing it the "normal" way, or that I was cheating. (Note: this only applies to me; I don't ascribe my feelings on this to anyone else. We are all on our own paths.) The WLS is a tool, given to me by a surgeon. But ultimately, I am the agent of this change. I decided to do it, I did the research, and I'm going to be doing the hard work to make the most of it. I want to Celebrate it. -
Any May Sleevers yet?
auroradawn replied to shrinkingkimber's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Just sent friend request -
Does anyone else feel this way: What if it doesn't work for me?
auroradawn replied to auroradawn's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Thank you! I'm not worried about the protein. I get lots now from Beans and tofu, etc., and I'll supplement with Protein shakes as needed (once I reach the mushy, soft, regular food stages). During the liquid stage, I'll just have to rely on protein shakes rather than broth, etc. I can already foresee that "head hunger" may be my biggest challenge down the road. I definitely want comfort foods when I've had a bad or stressful day. I need to find other ways to deal with that. Thanks everyone. It's really comforting to hear I'm the not the only one that's wondered this!