CaridadM

I remember being right where you are. I also remember other people words of encouragement and telling I'm going to get through it. Yet, all I felt was fear & despair. Like, how can they say this and at the time no one had experienced what I had. But after the fear and than the anger at myself for doing the surgery. I slowly started to ease up on myself. I had to be patient. It was not an easy roae. Mine became more complicated because I got pregnant 9 months after my surgery. However, I had a healthy son & I'm still carrying the 25lbs 3 years after having him. This is all to say. In the end it will balance out. It may not ve the way you expected but this is the path meant for you. You can get through this. Just remember - Give yourself patience - Give yourself forgiveness - Ask for help - And listen to your surgeon and nutritionist 3 years out and I still have some issues with the sleeve. But, in the end it was worth it & I learned something about myself as well. I hope this helped a little - Caridad

Hi Mdsd52 I had my surgery on 03/2016. Due to my complications I lost weight very quickly. I went from 315 to about 199 by Jan 2017. I understand your frustrations and fears alot. Even as I was losing weight on the outside I was in an emotional turmoil on the inside. I was unable to drink water beyond a few sips for months. I followed the trajectory of "typical" gastric sleeves and I was not having the same plateaus as others. My NG tube was removed 3 weeks after my surgery. I returned to work finally after my 5th week on leave. I will not say it was easy. I started at work being able to only eat 4 it's of cream of chicken soup and baby oatmeal. For wèeks that's all I had. I couldn't tolerate protein or milk. I threw Every thing up. I was so scared and second guessing the surgery every step of the way. People ask me now do I regret it and I say " you have to have a certain level of inner strength to get thru the process." I was an atypical gastric sleeve patient but as I began to understand my body more and paying attention to triggers. I became more comfortable with eating again. To this day I still throw up if I eat the wrong thing or to much. This pulls me down emotionally sometimes. All I can say to you is this is a hard and bleak time now. Even though your body is not responding the way the typical patients heal. Does not mean you will not. If your like me it just may take a lot longer. I have to add this. Due to my surgery I became more fertile and I got pregnant 9 months after my surgery ( also not recommended). I was so scared because I barely was getting enough calories for me - now I have to eat a certain amount more to sustain a child. I had a few complications during my pregnancy. But my son was born 09/2017. In this I am thankful for the surgery. I thought my chances at having children had passed. I say this to say... Dont give up and remember others have been where you are even if you can't find others like you online... In a year or two life can be dramatically different. But for now please be patient with yourself and your doctors... If you need more answers explore other bariatric MD's and get there input. I had my surgery at Univ of Chicago If you want more info or have questions or simply need to cry and vent during this time I can be your ear. I am sorry to hear of your complications but remember be patient. Just be patient with yourself and it is ok to be afraid and angry and happy all at once at this chaotic time.

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Thank you Songsmith those are excell entry tips. You are correct the feeding tube is demoralizing. It makes me feel broken. Thank you for your words. Caridad

Thank you Songsmith just hear someone else has been there helps. Luckily my NJ tube was inserted while under sedation. They also bridled it so it won't slip out. But the hardest has to be the feeding bags every night. Pushing 900 cc of Water thru it. Now I'm trying to learn my own strength again. This is psychological pain now. My heart breaKS daily knowing I choose this procedure and now my outcome. But I'm placing it in God hands now. I am resigning to his healing. Everyday see little baby steps of change. Like my baby stomach

March 4 th was my surgical date. Since 02/23 (preop diet) to today I've lost 30lbs Sent from my LG-H811 using the BariatricPal App

Wow... you encouraged me too, and I don't I have a prob with my facial features... thx. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G530AZ using the BariatricPal App Ha! That's cute ???? - your welcomeAs I go thru my complications from my surgery. I just realized all those on this blog are dealing with something. I know this surgery was not an easy decision for me and I have many feelings wrapped around it... as many of you But at least as this blog space goes we need to continue to encourage... I know it's helping me thru this trying time for me. -Caridad Caridad M.

LauraEllen it is terrible you feel this way about yourself. We are all made different so we can contribute our individuality to the world. When I look at your picture I do not see a ugly girl. I see a beautiful woman who for reasons only known to herself is still searching for her center. I too use to make fun of my facial features. Being of mixed heritage it is difficult to see similarities with my parents. It troubled me amongst other things for many years. I use to remark on how large my eyes were, or my connecting eyebrows. But my biggest hiccup was my lips. When I sit without a smile I have a natural frown. It took an artist friend of mine who took semi-professional of me to have me realize I am unique. My eyes, my nose my lips were fine for my face. Now s/p surgery 03/04 I am still on a nj tube because I am unable to keep fluids down. I have already lost 27 lbs from 2/27 (preoperative diet). However when I look in the mirror I too see the slimming face and smaller thighs. But apart of me misses those cheeks. Truth is many like myself have hid behind our weight. Allowing us to be ignored in some fashion. We have adjusted into adulthood with the "ok" feeling that we would not be 1st desired in the room. But we have done something about and we are trying to improve our lives. I want to stress to you. Your inner peace will immediately reflect on your face. Come to admire your eyes, your mouth, your everything. Because in the end no matter how many friends, boyfriends, husbands are around shouting encouragment. We individually must believe in our selves. Your beautiful Chica... and because of the vulnerability of your words - it shows your equally beautiful on the inside. Just know your not alone in this battle - Caridad Caridad M.

March 4th for me... anyone experienced complications after there surgery Sent from my SM-T550 using the BariatricPal App

Thank you all for your feedback. The small sips of Water to a large gulp , kranky, made me underdstand I will be able to drink for real soon enough. I was discharged this past Wednesday and have come home with nj tube. I have home health services assisting me with feeding bag and iv pole. After reading this feedback helps me to understand I will be ok. As swimbiker until states it takes the body a Lil while to get right One of my good friends who had gastric bypass 6 years ago said to me yesterday that " I need to be stronger than my emotions right now" between the support on here and that I'm already trying to submit to acceptance. Thanks Caridad

I am curious if anyone else has experienced what I am going thru now. I had my Sleeve on 03/04/16 since than i have been unable to hold down any fluids. I was discharged Tuesday 03/08/16. Only to be readmitted for dehydration since I am throwing Everything up. My readmission date was Friday 03/11/16 and i am still here. While here i have had a egd with dilation with attempt to open up narrowing in stomach. However after this procedure still couldnt keep fluids down. Finally my surgical team state i need a NJ tube. This was placed this past friday. They also found a twist so they did another dilation. So now i am here depressed and uncomfortable with a feeding tube. Has anyone gone through this? I feel so alone If so how long till the tube came out and you were able to eat & drink on own? Any feedback would be valuable Thanks Caridad

Hello Serendipity I too sat in the hospital for the 1st admission for 5vdays. Than 2 days later read minted for dehydration which lasted 13 days. I have not had the same issues as you. However, I can truly relate to the frustrations and fear that an elected surgery is now causing us. I cannot hold fluids so I am currently with a ng tube. It pains me deeply to know I made this decision in hopes for a better tomorrow . Only to be so severely thrown off course. Just know your not alone. I have not had any resolve yet but hopefully soon we can talk about better days Caridad

One change I was discharged Wednesday 03/23. Any other stories similar to mine

I am curious if anyone else has experienced what I am going thru now. I had my Sleeve on 03/04/16 since than i have been unable to hold down any fluids. I was discharged Tuesday 03/08/16. Only to be readmitted for dehydration since I am throwing Everything up. My readmission date was Friday 03/11/16 and i am still here. While here i have had a egd with dilation with attempt to open up narrowing in stomach. However after this procedure still couldnt keep fluids down. Finally my surgical team state i need a NJ tube. This was placed this past friday. They also found a twist so they did another dilation. So now i am here depressed and uncomfortable with a feeding tube. Has anyone gone through this? I feel so alone If so how long till the tube came out and you were able to eat & drink on own? Any feedback would be valuable Thanks Caridad