MrsFlipFlops

I'm confused about this quote. Women who become pregnant "against their wishes"... are we talking victims of rape or just pregnant women in general. Because in regards to pregnant women in general, who don't want a child, I wouldn't personally categorize them as promiscuous, uncaring, cold hearted and selfish... but if not irresponsible, what would you call them? Because I certainly would call them that.

First, you should know that adoption is the MOST successful when the children are adopted at birth. Therefore, if these "abortion minded" (I hate that term) women came forward and decided on adoption rather than abortion, the child would get adopted. Studies and life circumstances show that even children of color (who tend get adopted at a far slower rate than white children) are adopted if done so at birth. Second, I really dislike the fact that you lumped rapists in with women who had an "accident". Rape is the most despicable act, and perhaps I'm going from a limb from my pro-life people here, but in these cases, rape, incest... I believe abortion could be considered. But lumping THAT act, that FORCES a woman into sex in the most demeaning way possible with women who have "accidents" in ridiculous! Those who have "accidents" have control to STOP the pregnancy by not having sex! I have worked with child abuse cases, I have seen newborn babies going through drug withdrawal upon birth. I have witnessed a one pound baby be born. I have taken these kids into the state's custody and placed many of them into foster care. Through the years of seeing this and the tears and the pain that I felt for these poor innocent children, I have never once told myself that it would have been better off had they never been born. I have seen some of these children grow up and lead normal productive lives and seen them experience joy, along with their caregivers. Who am I to judge whether these children should have been born? Who is the mother to decide? The mother clearly didn't have the clarity of mind to not get pregnant, or the logic to stop using drugs.... how can I place the decision to stop a child from being born into her incapable hands? This opens a whole NEW can of worms. So all the families living, if you can call it that, on welfare. Homeless men and women and children- should we ENCOURAGE these people to have abortions? We've stepped over a line here. We've gone from abortion being a choice that's available and we've moved to you "not allowing" birth if they couldn't be cared for. Again, can't we just encourage people to practice safe sex... or heck, no sex at all until they can care for a child? Aren't people responsible to themselves? Can't "out of control" conceptions be stopped by using an something other than murder as a form of birth control? And stating that you're in favor of any and all methods--- I would hate to live in a world where THAT regime is in place. Someone to judge when I can and cannot have children... it's ludicrous. In my mind I imagine this governmental control looking over my finances and determining if I have enough spending money to finance a child. I really hate how abortion seems to be lumped into a category with Christian views. Almost making it dismissable with other Christian views... it's not a Christian issue, it's not necessarily a MORAL problem, it's a societal problem. Pro Choicers claim a woman should have control over her own body... should drug users have "control" to do what they want to their body? The answer is NO because it doesn't just affect that one person who is choosing an action for their body. And yes, I did lump pregnant women in with drug users... because they both have a CHOICE to not have inappropriate sex and to not use drugs.

My seatbelt in my car finally has give! I have some wiggle room! I can reach forward to change the radio without it choking me!! I'm glad for this NSV I noticed, since I didn't move any pounds this last week. :wub:

Here's my concern: who's to say how overweight is TOO much? Is it overweight, obese, morbidly obese? Where is the line drawn? Because if parents get their kids taken away for being overweight, or even "obese" then we're going to have a real big foster care problem on our hands.

Congrats! And ALWAYS feel welcome posting!! March 31st seems so close. I was banded 2/11/08 so am still fairly new. I'm learning to read myself a little better. Congrats again and keep us posted!

Yea! That's awesome, congratulations! At least it's a plan and a destination!!

Here's my problem with our little arguments... we're going to go round in circles... one person saying I had this experience and vice versa. Suffice it to say there are good people and bad people on BOTH sides of this argument. We could argue all day about when life begins, and the traumatization or what not. I don't like to get caught up in the mumbo jumbo about what happens at a pro life vs pro choice or whatever tactics they use. Do I care, yes. But I don't think it's relevant to the argument. First let me say, I've really enjoyed reading this thread. I think it's given me a lot to think about that perhaps I hadn't pondered before. And BJean, I really (and I'm not being sarcastic here- I know it's hard to tell online) have appreciated you taking the time to post, even when it seems you're outnumbered. But on to my thought... I think the most important argument for being pro life that I can say is, and this has been my problem with your arguments BJean, the whole time... you've been saying woman should be given choices, no one should tell them what to do... (in a nutshell) Women DO have a choice. Like my mom always says, women have a choice before they jump into bed with a guy! If you're not ready for the consequences of the action, despite using birth control, you should be prepared for the consequences. As a teenager, sure, I wanted to have sex. I knew birth control was available, but there is no birth control that is 100% effective and I, being the bright eyed, college bound child that I was, could simply not take that chance. It's not like sex is being FORCED on these people, women can say no! Sex isn't a life necessity, like water or air. They don't HAVE to have it. However, in the cases of child abuse or rape, etc... these were not chosen actions. In these cases, I agree that abortion could be considered. Not encouraged or opposed for the matter, but the option should be available. And after thoughtful consideration, a decision could be made. And what about men? Just because a woman is carrying the child, doesn't give them the right to make the choice a hundred percent. If I give you my wallet, you don't have the right to throw it away! Sure, some men, don't care... it's a "woman's" issue. I beg to differ, it's a societal issue. And another thing, just because something is backed by the government doesn't make it right- it just makes it legal. Having personally worked as an investigator of child abuse allegations, I can tell you a lot of programs (ones that even oppose eachother) are backed by the government. The government is run by people, just like you and me. Just because a bank has FDIC stamped on it's building, doesn't mean it's practices are perfect. That's all for now. I really hope I didn't offend anyone, I've just had these thoughts while posting. I have appreciated the opportunity to ponder and read these things. So thanks everyone!

BJean- Isn't that what a study does in general, take a certain population that was studied and apply it to the general population? It sounds to me that did a study and 90% of those women studied changed their minds. I think it's the concept that we should be grasping. Once a person realizes it's a person, they're more apt to change their minds.

Ginny- Just saw we're coming up on your banding date and I wanted to say Good Luck! I started this at 380 and was banded 2/11. I'm so happy so far... It's not just falling off of me, but it's a tool where I've finally realized I CAN DO IT! Getting on the scale and actually seeing the results has motivated me to keep going! Definately read the board. After surgery when I was in pain or wanting to eat or whatever the issue, I came to the board and found many people had gone through the same thing. Whether it be head hunger or, dare I say, gaseaousness... :mad2: There were people to help. Good luck!

Lots of liquids, soups, protein drinks. About a week out I got to move to tuna and mashed potatoes.... I was eating normal by four weeks out... of course every doctor is different.

I'm an extremely neat and tidy person, like almost OCD about it. When I click on the right hand side where it says Unanswered Posts, I have this crazy drive to answer all the questions so they'll be neat and tidy (and gone) I mean, there are a LOT of pages of unanswered questions. The neat person in me wants to clear it all! Anyone else have this weird desire?

I looked at my UHC and the total cost for mine was $43,000. I'm so not kidding. My dad says the insurance only pays a portion because they work out some kind of a deal. I don't understand the point of overbilling and still not getting paid the whole thing, but I guess I don't need to. :grouphug:

lol, it IS quite elaborate! I don't know how you got it though, when I've got too many lines it tells me it won't accept it. :grouphug: I like your cartoon though! :eek:

I agree Grace, I'm just starting this lapband journey... but have always felt moderation was key. I feel that's why I got the band, to help me in moderation and to make good choices most of the time, but when I do eat out, allow portion control. :grouphug: Since I've been banded I've had no Cookies, no cakes, but have had 2 (yes, TWO) candy bars. On seperate occasions of course. I'm glad I found a plan that I don't have to say no, instead I can say "You know, not right now... I'm not interested" I control the food, it doesn't control me.

Hey, neat. Thanks!

It will be sad if it's my new goal in life... :-) I'm just glad to know I'm not the only one who has had this neurotic notion. :drool:

That's called bureaucracy!! :drool:

I just got my first fill and the doctor told me it would feel like I had no restriction for a little longer. They say it takes about 3 fills. My doctor fills no more frequently that 4 weeks apart. I'm pretty good with about a cup of food, but get hungry so I have small Snacks. Protein Water is good because it keeps me full throughout the day.

I never drank diet... but I do miss soda

Welcome! You're free to share more info than that! :drool: Are you banded or going to be banded? Just researching? Tell us about yourself.

I guess my coworkers aren't that nosy. I told one coworker who had bypass a few years ago, and she was totally supportive. AS for my protein shakes and small lunches, no one has seemed to notice of care. I took a week off and some asked how my vacation was, I said it was fine, I just stayed home, but it was nice to get back to work. (After sitting at home following surgery, I was practically begging to go back to work... I got bored!) :smile: Good luck.

This was a lot of great advice and thoughts. Thank you SO much! "I believe you will get to a point where you look forward to the future and not fear the journey" I loved this quote. And it's true... Wheet... being here is way better than I was before, simply by having just a little more energy. I'm so hard on myself sometimes. When I overeat I think about it and say mean things about myself! :smile: Jena- I bought a shirt at WalMart, my normal size... but my dad said to me "You look like you're swimming in that thing!" Just cause it was a little looser. Walmart is a good place to get things, maybe something spring-y will make me feel better. Each season I'll be a new size or something funky like that. This was all great advice, thank you so much. It made me feel so much better.

All my life I've felt the need to stand up for the underdog. The underdog comes in many forms... but I've always felt the need to stand up for those who don't or can't stand up for themselves. I will never falter from that stance. Of course I want to be liked, but not at the default of doing what's right.

All my life I've felt the need to stand up for the underdog. The underdog comes in many forms... but I've always felt the need to stand up for those who don't or can't stand up for themselves. I will never falter from that stance. Of course I want to be liked, but not at the default of doing what's right.