newhope4me

I've got a new fave drink, Disarrono! OMG, for those who haven't tried this, don't. It is too good, so smooth. Hubby and I bought a bottle over the weekend before xmas, and have since finished 3 more bottles. And we usually aren't daily drinkers. I told him the other day we need to stop buying it, he said no, just restrict ourselves. LOL, yeah, right. Then my boss gave me a bottle with a bottle of eggnog, lol. Well, like i keep saying...January 1st... I also made mac and chz for my daughter 2nite with real cream and butter, to try to use it all up to get it out of the house.

That is my confession too! Even my own cooking, i've been using real butter and heavy cream. I forgot how yummy real mashed potatoes are. But I came into December thinking I will eat yummies and goodies and sweets, but of course in January I will get back on track. I even reminded my daughter this morning that January 1st we go back to chicken and good carbs, no more mashed potatoes. I haven't even weighed myself for about 2 wks, in order to not depress myself! However, I notice that with my wonderful band, even though I'm eating all this yummy, delicious holiday food, I'm not eating nearly as much as I could have eaten last year.

Is Sugar and Spice new? Thier online store is not up yet? Plus, I've never heard of that one. I have a friend that does Slumber Parties. But I think all that have been mentioned are aimed at women.

Colorado Chick, "What you think about you bring about is what my grandmother always said." I love this, I think I might use this. I'm always telling my kids, "Life is as miserable as you make it."

Of course I'm over this now, so many months after the fact, but thank you.

I have always considered myself a pretty liberal person. Or maybe i'm just getting old! Friday we took my 12 yr old daughter to a baseball game. She had received a ticket from her school for "Private School Night". We thought it would be an enjoyable family evening. Not quite... I guess in addition to it being "Private School Night" it was also "Halloween Costume Night." As the vendors were coming through the stands selling Snacks and beverages, there was one vendor who looked like she was selling a little more than that. Hubby and I both thought it was inappropriate and distasteful for a "family oriented event" such as a baseball game. Had we been at a bar or other "adult only" venue, it would would have been fine. Where I work, we do not allow the staff to dress for Halloween anymore due to situations like this. It seems many people do not realize what is appropriate and what is not. In fact it is an outfit that hubby likes and I have a similar one in the closet... the short skirt, lace-topped thigh highs, white top that the girl was spilling out of. And I don't believe I'm saying this out of jealousy, since the girl was about the same size if not a bit larger than I. Hubby even talked to the assistant manager (apparently the manager was not available). Basically he was dismissed that "It is Halloween Costume Night." Ok, I understand that, but they are dressed as.....and is that what we want to emulate at a family oriented event? While hubby was speaking with the asst. manager, another girl walked by dressed identically. Now, we are not overprotective of my daughter, she knows the facts of life, she is aware some women make a profession out of what it appeared these girls were emulating. However, its not only about my daughter, but all the other children (many of whom were younger than mine) and families. I feel lucky that my daughter is so modest; she doesn't even like to wear bermuda length shorts and she can't stand v-neck tops. As I stated, I believe I am pretty liberal. However, what I wear to a girl scout meeting is completely different than what I wear to go to a strip club with hubby. Now, am I overreacting that it was inappropriate? I know that many girls wear less day to day, but these girls (early 20's I'm guessing) were obviously dressed like hookers/strippers, is that appropriate at a baseball game on the same night that school age children are going to be the majority of the attendees? Am I just getting old and making too much of this?

(my 2 cents) My first MIL was sweet, but very judgemental. Since I wasn't married to her favorite son and I am not materialistic I don't think she really knows how to interact with me. My current MIL is wonderful as well, but just not what I'm used to, lol. She is a stoner, hippie type. The first gift she ever bought for me was crystals. She's the sweetest thing, we just think differently. Also, since she was absent (at least mentally) for most of hubby's childhood, there's a bit of discomfort between us (my knowing family secrets, her feeling a bit of guilt for not being a better mother, etc) Ex-hubby and I used to get along until after I allowed him (he didn't even have visitation) to have the kids for a few months, he tried to refuse to give them back. Before that, I would stay at his and his new wife's home (she was a classmate of mine when we were in high school, but not friends). She and I actually got along better than he and I did, up until he called her by my name at a family event. It still makes me laugh (i'm such a bitch) And talking about gift giving, exMIL once gave me a couple of bras for xmas. 1st, let me explain that she's actually Jehovah's Witness, but always gave gifts like a week before, and say it's not for xmas. So she gave me a couple of bras, I was like 19 yrs old and to me they looked like "old-lady-bras" (no offense to anyone). I was so embarrassed. I wasnt going to say anything, but hubby (1st hubby) said that if i didnt say anything, she would continue to buy bras for me. So I was honest with her and told her they weren't my style. She explained that since I just had a baby, that they would provide more support than the ones I wore. At the time i found it super awkward!

Maybe i'm just cheap, but even though i have some toys, ranging in size, shape and texture, i prefer a nice warm bath. In the right position and the right water temperature, it's a great way to start the day! Relaxing yet it energizes me for the day.

With the new year approaching, it's a great time to get back on track. That's how I would approach it. I knew that once Thanksgiving hit, i threw out worrying that i was only getting quality calories, until Jan 1. Why fight it, why not enjoy the holidays with everyone else? I have enough to worry about, with the holidays and this is the busiest time of year for me at work. My hubby is a Marine, and suppossed to be in top shape. But with his gaming addiction (which for those who are familar w/ a previous thread of mine, he did just beat when the expansion caused him to lose interest), he is completely out of shape. The first of the year is our goal together to get back on track and to continue our healthier lifestyle. We both prefer different types of physical activity therefore we've never worked out together, but the food thing is our combined downfall. Like I said, maybe making "resolutions" will help motivate her. Also, maybe seeing all your success has discouraged her a bit, possibly affecting her security, which led to her not wanting to work as hard. Just a suggestion.

i know i'm a bit late in responding, o, the holidays, anyway, for all those readers out there who have spent thousands on books (as have I), check out paperbookswap.com I've saved hundreds since joining. I love to read true crime/non-fiction.

I got my band in Mexico so I guess I do have a "foreign object" in my body. (sorry, couldn't resist) In regards to the "natural way", this is why I chose to not tell anyone about this procedure. I don't need anyone's judgement or negativity in my road to a healthier, happier and dare i say, more attractive me. In your quest to try to avoid the band and try to do it the "natural way" are you starving yourself?...taking diet meds?...depriving your body of necessary nutrients? I know with the band, I am no longer doing these unsuccessful things. I also don't feel like I am going to gain it back. I feel successful. I am much happier, especially knowing that I have avoided many medical issues in my future.

I have heard that about men not always ejaculating when they climax, but I'm sure he would know if he is climaxing. He's not. He does enjoy it, otherwise why would he ask for it. I enjoyed it when I was in the similar situation in the past. But it's more like foreplay than an actual sex act, I hope you understand what I mean by that. I know how frustrated i get when i am right there, but for whatever reason (stress, whatever) i just cant get there. I hate that frustrated feeling. It seems that is where he gets to, and I wonder why he would want to get to that point. When we are home, then no problem, we can finish another way. But going back to the road head issue, why would you want to get to that point in the car? To be frustrated like that? I have spoken to him about it, more than once. It's always, we'll keep trying. I don't consider him greedy (I used to love to give oral, now it's not so enjoyable since I'm so frustrated). Like I said, I've had issues in the past, I understand not being comfortable (or being so insecure that I can't enjoy it) in certain situations. He makes up for it in other ways.

Right now I'm struggling because it seems i have problems with real food, but hershey bars go down no problem! But i tell everyone at work that i've lost weight by basically cutting out sugar.

Ok, I have a question, more of I need motivation I think. Hubby has never, ever, ever finished while receiving oral. (I believe he has some hangups regarding something he saw when he was young) He loves receiving it, but I am frustrated with trying. Logically, I understand (being a survivor of sexual abuse, who has gotten past my own hangups). I constantly think in my head that it's not me, it's his issue, etc. I give myself pep talks (once when i was single i gave a guy six orgasms in one nite doing only oral, that should be pretty encouraging) to try to get myself in the mood. I have read every book about giving oral (didn't learn anything I didn't already know). It's very frustrating for me, i feel like i am under tremendous pressure. We can take a drive and he mentions road head, but why, why would you want to get all excited for no end? I've talked with him about it. He is optimistic that one of these times...but damn, how frustrated am I going to be by then? And then, also for me, it affects me as i have a complex that i have to do this, i have to be his best (always had this issue with everyone i've ever been with). I can tell he's gotten close several times. Now I'm just to the point that I almost don't want to try. I'm just too frustrated. And need I mention that he will not give oral, again going back to the hangups? Which is something I knew shortly after we met and I accepted, but i still miss it. The most he may do, and this is only like once every couple of years, is barely lick my clit as I orgasm. I have a friend who feels sorry for me since her husband would stay down there all day, lol. But anyway, I just am looking for some encouragement, motivation I guess to continue to try for "one of these times..." lol. (maybe a shrink would be better to advise me rather than a sex educator, hmmm?)

i have heard of the modest wear bathing suits. My daughter is 13, wears a Jr size 5 and is pretty modest. This past summer we were having difficulty finding her a bathing suit that she was happy with. They were all too revealing for a 13 year old in my eyes and she is more a tankini w/ boy short bottoms type of girl. So I started looking online for a modest bathing suit. omg, they have bathing suits similar to what my grandma used to wear when she was young! I didn't realize there was a market. My daughter didn't want to go that modest. But it was interesting seeing them. And 17 kids! wow! I've seen the ads for it (I watch jon & kate plus 8) but never actually watched the show. i couldnt even imagine.

Hate to hijack the thread, but that is one of my favorite movies of all time; watch it whenever its on! Now that you are here, i'm trying to think if i have any questions for you (regarding your post, not Ferris, lol)

i have a friend who recently came to me and admitted her fantasy (to watch her b/f w/ another girl) and asked me to help her find a girl. I seem to be the go to person for info about such things, lol. Now that she did that, they are becoming more adventurous and planning a 3some. It really suprised me, because this is a friend who before when we were all single and would go to the strip clubs, she was always embarrassed when we bought dances for her from the girls. O, and btw, she and her b/f are getting married in april. I think as long as all involved are honest about thier intentions and there are no insecureties or jealous feelings, it can work for married couples. I know a few couples who are happily married and have alternative lifestyles. My husband and I have a pretty traditional relationship though, we both experimented and had adventures when we were single (or in my circumstance, in my first marriage-as mentioned before, for the wrong reasons though).

tapshoes, thank you very much! I'm very proud (like you couldn't tell) Minxz, wish you were near me. I've been looking for a baker who delivers. At work we need cakes a few times a month, and it would be great if we had one on call that would deliver!

I didn't read through all the posts, only the first and last page, however, I am responding to the original post. I will do what I always do...I will support our country! Yes, I have been called naive or what have you, but honestly, what does having our the people of our country being divided do for us? We are a military family and whoever is in that position is our Commander in Chief. What my husband is ordered to do, he must do. My husband does not follow politics, since it is easier for him to follow orders if he doesn't know whether or not he disagrees with who is giving the orders. I vote for whom I believe is the best choice. Then whoever is elected, is who is elected; there is no changing that for at least 4 years. No amount of arguing, complaining or being miserable is going to change that. How it seemed we all pulled together after 9/11, how it seemed we were again "one nation indivisible..." that's what I wish we could be, without a tragedy to make it happen.

Bella, make sure you read the instructions for the tampons. I did have a mom at home, however, she never spoke about any of this. I remember as a girl, having a friend give me a tampon in a time of need and I had no idea what to do and was not comfortable enough to ask. I left the applicator in, and omg! how uncomfortable! I couldn't understand why anyone chose them. Until I finally saw a box and saw how they worked.

mmmmm comfort foods...i would love to get some alternatives. during PMS comfort foods are all i crave. for me it's homemade chicken and noodles (homemade egg noodles) and mashed potatoes. I can satisfy my craving with the broth and mashed potatoes and a few pieces of chicken, but it's more carbs that i like to have. another one that gets me, nachos. i don't know why, but i have no trouble with nachos. during TOM when i'm tighter, nachos seem like the only thing that i dont have problems with. weird!

I think your husband is on your side, just being protective towards you. Maybe he has heard negative comments regarding the band in general and does not want any negativity directed towards you when people learn that you have been banded. Just this past weekend hubby saw a commercial for lapband. It stated the risk of fatality. He freaked! I told him every medical procedure has risks and that the risk of death is minor. (I've been banded since March) It was kinda cute that he was so concerned even though I apparently made it through the procedure and have had no complications.

I feel like the exception, I prefer a modestly endowed man. I have been with men who would put porn stars to shame, but it was like "woo hoo, look what I have" but they don't know what they are doing. My husband, like most men believes he's "small." I don't think so, I think he'd be considered average. As much as I would love to say he's the best i've ever been with (in some positions, i would say he has been), the one who was, was less endowed than hubby. However, at "that" moment he like, well, you know what cannons do in cartoons, how they like do the accordion like thing and then shoot forward a bit when they blow? that's what it felt like! That was an awesome feeling. omg, just realized this may be TMI, but we are in on off-topic thread.

I'm in Yuma. I recommend Dr. Aceves too. He is awesome! It makes a nice day trip too. I enjoy shopping in Calexico, I get my daughter's clothes at such a great price. And once I got this great formal dress, $45! What a bargain! Anyway, if you'd like a guide, I have most weekends open.

Your post caught my eye for the strangest reason...I grew up in Kansas, lol. Anyway, yes, usually before the surgery, the dr. likes you do lose some weight initially to shrink your liver, most are on liquids right before the procedure. This is because if they knick the liver, it can cause huge problems, so better that it is shrunk and out of thier way. Also, your husband may be looking out for your best interest at heart, but being a man (no offense to any men out there), he may not know how to voice his true concern. Many people (uneducated people) think the band is the "easy way" to lose weight. Many on here have chosen (myself included) to keep it personal and only tell those who are close to them. I had a co-worker who was banded about a year before I was, I saw the negativity directed to her choice and the band itself. I didn't want to go through that. That may be his way to protect you from any negativity or maybe he feels that way somewhat, but doesn't want to openly say that. When people ask me how I lost the weight, I am honest...I changed my whole families eating habits and get up off my butt. We do not have simple carbs or sugar in the house. I'm not lying. And it's not easy. There are many opinions regarding telling vs not telling. In the end, it is your decision.