Wheetsin

I wish I could be better at the "passive" part of PA. I've called someone out here one time (well, one time intentionally, anyway). It was a question that was just too much. To answer it, you would have had to be able to predict the future. And I was just like -- how on earth could anyone possibly answer that question, so why on earth would you ask it??? And I (not very passively) sort of called the person out a little, and in return was called a bisexual. Well, I thought I was called a bisexual, because the person typed "bi," but it was pointed out to me that it was probably a truncated "b!tch." It ended up quite amusing. ^ I'm also too literal for my own good, sometimes, even though I can be a fairly abstract person. DH thinks I do it to be frustrating, but it really is just how my mind works (I would be classified as a "concrete random" in some brain circles).

Did you try to have sex with him and he refused, or did you just assume he'd "know" he was supposed to, and then get mad when he didn't? Our men will never, ever, ever live up to our expectations of them. Mostly because we're really, really, really bad about sharing our expectations... and most men aren't born with crystal balls. ^ Maybe some will, but I think this is a safe, general rule applicable to most men who had normal relationships throughout their lives. Once for our anniversary DH got me a freaking blender. WTF? But in his mind I like to cook, so it's perfect. And several times for anniversary, xmas, whatever I will get nothing. In his mind, it's preferrable to get me nothing, than to get me the wrong thing. Or he will take me to a jewelry store and say "pick something" -- which totally ruins it for me (and I'm not big on jewlery either... what I want I already have).

How long is "some time"? You could be stalled or plateaued. There's really no research supporting this, but it also sure seems like we have metabolic resistance points or something. Weights our bodies just seem to like to stay at. Sometimes they correspond to weights we spent longer periods of time at as we gained, but sometimes they're just sort of arbitrary. When I had my lap-band, I spent about 18 months at 250. My body just seemed to like that weight (damn body). Really no matter what I did, I stuck within 4 or 5 lbs of it. My family situation is a bit different. DH has never shopped for groceries (ok, he's run and gotten me some eggs when I've forgotten them... but he has never madea solo trip with the intention of purchasing anything more than something I asked him to purchase), and DD is a young'en so I kind of "control" all of the groceries at the house. And since you've already talk ed to them about it, and they're ignoring your wishes, how do you escalate that without drama? Hmm. Can you give them a separate area for their foods? I'm going through a sort of stall now. It happens. Mine is happening pretty soon right after surgery, so I've been stalled most of the time I've been sleeved (like 75% - 80%). That's the frustration for me. It's like -- can I please at least get to 1 smaller size before you stall out on me? When I had my lapband I would stall for a handful of weeks, and then quickly lose tons of weight in between. Here, I'm kind of just stalling, perpetually it seems. it's not a pity party, sometimes you just have to get it off your chest. It's just human nature. I'm not a really "Needy" person, I don't generally ask for help and tend to deal with most things internally. "Even I"posted about my stall frustrations yesterday. Sometimes you just need to know you're not crazy, or have another set of eyes look over your menus, or see that you're not the only one (even if you already know you're not).

I've never tried the savory Protein drinks so I can't help there, but you could get unflavored (it's not tasteless, it just doesn't have an added flavor like chocolate or vanilla) and add it to lukewarm broths or thinned cream Soups. It gets gross and gloppy if you heat it too much, that's why I say lukewarm. I'd say try one of the nectar Proteins (flavors like roadside lemonade, fuzzy navel...). They aren't sweet, but they also aren't very good on their own. I can get them down if I add something like crystal light, but that sweetens it. You could also doctor up standard protein drinks using some PB2 or SF syrups (I use a salted caramel syrup when I make Protein Powder ice cream, and a healthy pinch of salt... I don't like sweet, and if I have it, I have to have it balanced with salty).

Haven't heard of them, and most of the reviews I could find were on their own site (so probably just a tad biased). http://www.la.bbb.org/business-reviews/Other-Financial-Services/Medical-Financial-Group-in-Los-Angeles-CA-13187249

You really wanted us to know this, huh? (being facetious re: triple post) You don't feel different? Including when you try to eat or drink? No real tips b/c I don't really know what you need tips about. Just generally? (BTW, you're home from surgery, but you posted in pre-op -- you'll probably get more responses and better help in post-op since most in pre-op are still pre-op).

I believe you have to request a mod delete it. I think it's been disabled at the user level, and the most you can do is edit it out blank (up until someone quotes you, anyway).

A pat on the back, or some good information. I'm not real good at the former, but I'll always try to give the latter. But that's "support" to me. I don't need to hear "good job." I need to hear "here's what you're missing..."

Below in blue.

Below in blue.

So you're self-pay... did you choose that program? You don't sound pleased about it so I'm guessing not. Why use it if you have choices? (Usually self-pay has the most choice, even budget self-pay).

Oh, I was quite literally running (ok, walking briskly - I am FAT, afterall) to the bathroom with IV starters poking out of my arms & still trying to swallow the last few drops of the pepcid. When my surgeon came back to the prep area I told him that if I shat on the OR table, it was his fault for making me drink that crap. At least there's this: you will never know. They won't tell you if you do or don't, one way or the other.

Rants & raves. http://www.verticals...lk-rants-raves/ Not saying you have to by any means, jsut that it's a bit of a shelter for the topics that can be interpreted as a bit more inflammatory. Lack of common sense bothers me, too - or maybe I should say misinformation, and ignorance. But lack of common sense too. I can't tell you how many times I've had to wonder how someone can seriously not know the answer to their question. But in my line of work, I'm slapped in the face every day by how much one person's "aha!" is another person's "duh.."

To that note, you might also want to consider asking a mod to move this to RnR. At least there it will be in the most harmless context.

You may have mentioned this above, if so I missed it, were you this way before losing the weight as well? Is there any point in time when you can remember this setting in, or has it always been that way (at least as far as you can remember)? I hate people touching me. Even something as innocuous as meeting a friend for lunch who wants to give me a hug when we part, or taking a driver's hand to get out of a car, an introductory handshake, or whatever. It applies to strangers, acquaintances... but even the people I'm closest to. My husband (of almost 15 years) for example. I am OK with my husband touching me most of the time, but he's a "cuddler" and it drives me nuts. I don't mean this as in sexual, I just mean it as in human contact - you could replace "my husband" with "my parents" and it's equally true. DH is a very touchy guy and always wanting to hold hands, or have his arm around me or rub my neck or something and it just bugs the crap out of me. He always wants to be touching when we go to bed (even just a foot against a foot -- again, nothing that has to be sexual) and sometimes I'm ok with it, sometimes I initiate it, but the vast majority of the time I "tolerate" it and then move away once he's asleep. But I don't crav those types of "connections" (physical, which is also going to be mental) as you do, I actively try to avoid them. I just don't really like people, and I REALLY don't like people touching me. It's partly a personal space thing, partly a behaviorized shame thing related to weight (at my heighest weight - about 90 lbs heavier than I am now - someone would go to, say, put their arm on my back as though to indicate you first and I'd be like... great, you're gonna feel my back rolls...), partly protection, partly... on and on. Dn't get too down on yourself about it. You can be a well rounded person and still have aversions, or insecurities, or whatever's going on. We're all neurotic, but we're not all insane.

Most people misuse the term stall, I'm guilty myself even though I know the difference. People losing weight - not just people here, and not just bariatric patients - see good weightloss and don't understand that it's simply not sustainable. It might amaze (or dismay) you how many people come into something like this knowing nothing other than what their surgeon has told them, or what they've read online or seen on the internet, or just made up in their own minds. There's just no knowledge of the actual body processes that are going on "behind the scenes". Look at how many people don't understand the extremely simple difference between "fat" and "weight", and truly believe that because their scale is up 2 lbs, they're somehow overeating. Or that because their scale said 150 at 8:00am, and 150.6 at 8:20am, they must have somehow done something wrong during those 20 minutes. I'm plateaued (even though I say stalled), and working to change things up. In my case, it's an atypical plateau and I didn't think much of it for the first 4 weeks or so because I understand that things are happening, that my liver's being a weightloss wanker, that these cankles I have mean something, etc. Unfortunately the rationale only lasts so long before irrational thoughts start to have a voice, too. I know they're irrational, and I know better, but they are still there. And to a degree, if you're going to be on a "support board" (ANY support board), it's just the nature of the beast. Sometimes common sense is not so common, and sometimes people are in desperate panics over quite literally nothing, or confusion. At the end of the day, gas prices may drive me crazy and I may want to shake my fists every time they go up, but I'm still agreeing to drive a car, so there's not much to say.

I think when measured out the capacity difference between the smallest bougie commonly used (I'm guessing 32) and largest (guessing 54) is about a teaspoon. I calculated it out once but right now I'm not remembering the exact number. As I've said before, none of us got MO on a teaspoon. So in terms of capacity, bougie size is basically a moot point. A 32 Fr bougie has an inner diameter of... (get out calculator)... 0.4". A 40 Fr bougie is 0.5". That's a whopping one tenth of an inch difference. But also remember that bougie size and sleeve size are not the exact same. The long term stats of % EWL losses between bougie sizes (at least the ones with long term results available) are virtually the same, if not exactly the same. Surgeons used to (and maybe still do) follow the logic that a smaller bougie = smaller sleeve = better weightloss. Now they're seeing trends that smaller bougie = greater leak risk, and greater incidence of post-op GERD. The threshhold between higher incidence and no higher incidence seems to be the difference between a 32 and 34 Fr bougie, respectively. But even that's a bit arbitrary, and going to depend to a degree on the patient. My surgeon will not use anything smaller than a 34. The average stomach is about 12" long and about 6" wide, with a standard capacity of about a quart. Tall people have longer stomachs? I think it's debatable. It's all just genetics and genetics favor proportion, mostly for survival, but we see a lot of exceptions every day. And I've seen a lot more studies refuting it than supporting it. ~1950 there was a study of 126 cadaver stomachs, and there was no significant correlation between stomach size and height, nor stomach size and weight, nor stomach size and gender: And from 2002: *shrug* Dunno. I know that I'm taller than most females here, have a Fr 34, and am eating less than most other posted quantities I pay attention to.

I'd say it lays more in whatever your body tells you. scales are sadistic liars.

There's really no way to tell. I kind of thought within an hour or two something wou'dve happened so I called my pharmacist and asked and he said "usually within a few hours" and I asked him to define a few (nicely) and he said "Oh maybe 1, but sometimes 8 or 10." Doing the math I think it took me about 14 hours. There was one exception of a tiny "spurt" (felt like it was going to be more) that was kind of like raw magnesium citrate, sorry if that's TMI, stinky as all get out. So I thought ok, game on... that was about 7pm, but nothing else happened.

I'm in MO but KC, not STL. There's a pretty large core of WLS surgeons in the KC area, and quite a few people on here from the region. There's a MO forum you might want to check out - see if there are locals near you who have used the surgeon/center you're considering. Best of luck.

What foods can you have 5 days post op? I was allowed mushies by then. I've posted a recipe for crustless pizza - you can just adjust the toppings to something mushy friendly (cheeses, really). The "crust" is a quiche derivative. I picked this up years ago on Atkins and whenever I'd make it the people who tasted it preferred it to standard pizza. My whole family loves it (DH requests it). http://www.verticalsleevetalk.com/topic/34933-craving-pizza-surgery-tuesday-help/page__p__306538#entry306538

I'm not familiar with the phone app. I have it but haven't used it. You migh get better response if you post in the technical help area, rather than the post-op area. Alex does a good job of monitoring the help forum. Here's a link.

I'm stalled for about the same. See my thread here. I'm posting all the change-ups I've tried, as well as the ones just suggested today (after the others did nothing). If you aren't already, try a site like myfitnesspal and log EVERYTHING, no matter how minor it seems.

All things being equal, I would stay in the states. There's more to consider than cost. Don't have to search for an aftercare provider, should one be needed Like not having to mess with travel Like that I could get home quickly Like that I have post-op visits/long-term care with my actual surgeon who's most familiar with what happened during my procedure Some prefer the MX surgeon histories. I selected my surgeon and am more comfortable with his history I'd say keep trying through insurance, but maybe set a date at which you look at your other options. That's what I did - it all ended up working out, but I wasn't going to just sit around forever. All things not being equal, my first choice was to self-pay my chosen surgeon's rates (about $12K). I was initiall denied by insurance, appealed and won, then insurance changed and I was back to square one... I'd started working on this in September 2011. When it was Jan and nothing had happened yet I talked to DH and we agreed that if I didn't have an approval by March 31, we would just self-pay and not worry about the insurance. But that's a different scenario, because $12K is much higher than my copays (totalling about $400), and much higher than a MX surgeon.

Ok I kinda hate these little names for "century" weights so this feels a little hypocritical but I've always seen the 300s referred to as "Threedom." Which really just makes me want to mis-sing the RATM lyrics.