Wheetsin

I met my husband in Europe. At the time, we were both with other people, but our relationships were a tad on the rocks. We really got along and had a spooky amount of things in common, which never happens for me. None of the daily things like favorite movies, music, etc. -- but all of the stuff that IMO makes or breaks a relationship. We called it our "right person, wrong time" moment. I returned home and life progressed as it does. We both found ourselves single. But living 6k miles apart, what do you do? Letters, obscenely expensive phone calls, and a lot of "someday"s later my college got email, and as soon as I realized that I could email people outside of my own school, things kind of took off. Then came prehistoric tools like ytalk (please tell me someone here knows what this is)... we're talking the days where Mosaic was a hot thing, but Lynx was commonplace. 2 years after we met, I went back to visit him. During those 2 years, we commuicated online almost every day, sometimes for 10+ hours a day. About a year into it he took a job programming for a European phone company that owned their own lines so he could call me for free, that helped. So, even though we didn't meet online, we developed online. Long before online dating was normal or even heard of. My friends all thought it was really weird. How could I have feelings for someone that I had just met? It wasn't like we were "real," we just talked online.

I don't watch much tv at all so I haven't seen this show many times - perhaps 2 or 3, and probably never saw an entire episode. So I understand that I may not get the larger picture of what's going on. Knowing that, the concept of this show really makes me mad. Just like so many shows like it do. They take people who know they have a problem, and (I assume) really want help overcoming it, and then try to sabotage them for ratings. This is probably 2 years ago, at least, but I caught a preview for an upcoming season of this show. It showed people crying while exercising, etc. -- and I remember them showing a long clip of one very large lady bawling and crying like a baby, blabbering out something like I just want food!!! Please just let me eat. I need to eat!!" I thought that was so disgusting. I thought it gave America exactly the picture of obesity they wanted. But I understand it gets the ratings. I have this conversation with the tv crowd I work with (the ppl who can tell you everyone's name and who their allied with, who's doing who, etc.) and they say "But these people know that's going to happen." That's fine, but the idea of trying to sabotage these people's progress still irritates me. I'd rate it along with "Temptation Island."

Don't have the patience to edit so I wanted to add - when I say don't buy silken, that's assuming you want to use the tofu as some type of meat substitute or cook it in such a way that you want it to hold its shape. That's why I specified using silken as a swet substitute, but now that I've re-read, I'm not sure that was clear. :car:

I eat tofu all the time. Here are some tips, and my favorite recipes. (I made them up, so bear with the unexact nature). Tips: Don't buy SILKEN tofu. Not even "FIRM SILKEN". SILKEN tofu is too soft for cooking, and falls apart. Any time I hear something like "I've tried to cook tofu but it just falls apart" I know they're working with SILKEN, which is probably close to Jello in firmness, and it's best as a substitute for wet things like cream, cottage cheese, yogurt, sour cream, and soft cheeses. Buy tofu that does not have SILKEN on the package (aka firm tofu). If you absolutely cannot find FIRM tofu, buy the firmest SILKEN you can find (extra firm) and dry it out by placing it between two folded towels or several layers of paper towels, place a try on top to distribute the weight, and place a book or even a few cans on top of the tray. Let sit at least 2 - 3 hours. Even then, you will not get the same firmness as you would from FIRM tofu. (It's not a bad idea to do this regardless, unless you're buying pre-flavored tofu, but to have any chance with SILKEN tofu it's required). Remember that tofu has zero-to-"green" flavor on its own, and needs some help. A friend at work said she tried tofu and hated it. Well yeah, she had just peeled it open and taken a forkful. Recipes: My favorite recipe. Sorry I don't have exact measurements. Slice 1 or 2 packages of extra firm tofu into 1/2" strips. Mix about 2 cups of no pulp OJ, maybe 3 tbls of honey, 3 tbls of brown sugar, 1 tbl of sesame oil, 1 tbl rice vinefar, a few tbls of Thai spicy peanut sauce (I like the Bangkok or Archer Farms brands the best), and a cup - cup and a half of soy sauce. Marinate the tofu slices in the mixture at least 4 hours. Remove the tofu, keep the marinade. Get a skillet hot and add sesame oil, then fry the tofu. It's hard to burn tofu, so I don't have an exact time to fry it, I just do it until it's brown and crispy on the outside. While it's frying I baste it with small amounts of the marinade & add'l peanut sauce. When the tofu is fried, remove and pour the marinade into the skillet. Reduce it until it's a thick, carmelized sauce. If it's not carmelizing nicely, add a bit more brown sugar or honey. It may take a while, bit you'll get the reduction eventually. I eat the tofu plain, and serve it over Basmati rice for DH, with some of the sauce drizzled over. DH's favorite. As above, slice the tofu in 1/2: strips. Mix 2 eggs with a tsp of milk. It's a fat fried dish, so mix up your crunchy coating of choice. I use breadcrumbs (forget the brand but they come in a yellow can and have aged romano mixed in), parmesan, asiago, a pinch of garlic powder, a tiny dash of oregano, and a pinch of salt. Dip in egg, dip in coating, then repeat so they're double dipped. Pan fry in peanut oil. Then I do one of two things - serve it with marina sauce and Pasta, or make bruschetta to go with it. Bruschetta: I sweat 1 medium chopped onion and add it to a hot skillet with EVOO. Salt lightly to draw out the moisture. When it's softened, add 2 cloves of fresh chopped garlic. Then I add in 2 cans of diced tomatoes. I cook this until it starts to get thick, and then I add a can of chicken broth, 1/3 at a time, cooking until reduced each time. Line a baking tray with either hard bread chips, or pre-toasted slices. Top each piece with the tomato mixture and a small heaping pile of cheese (I use a combination of parmesan reggiano, asiago and provolone that I grate up & blend while the chicken broth is cooking out). Bake at 350 for about 20 mins, or until the cheesy is browned & bubbly.

I believe it was laparoscopic. I'm not sure. I will PM you some information.

A girl I know has had it twice. Both times required surgery to fix it.

Yes. If you're only taking in liquid, you can't expect much solid to come out. :car:

Marimaru, I wear heels and the trick is the type of heel. Very very few women can wear any thin heels above pumps (3") without pain - they're just good at walking through it. Wedge heels - I could wear all day and never think twice about it. :car:

I decided not to set goals because if I didn't reach them, I didn't want to feel that I had failed. Kind of like -- expect nothing, and then you're never disappointed. I wanted to hit a size 18 because as I gained weight, that's where I last felt comfortable. I'm pretty much there now, still need the occasional 20s on bottom. From there, I would like to hit 180 because I was pretty damn yummy at 180 (I'm between 5'10 & 5'11, so 180 isn't as bad as it sounds). I did once have a target of "obese" BMI. When I was banded my BMI was close to 55. That's off most BMI charts, and well beyond "super morbidly obese". I wanted to at least be on the charts. My BMI is now about 34. I'm now "obese" and within 20 - 30 pounds of just being "overweight." I just wish I could construct a mental model for my new self. Maybe I should make that my goal.

Need to know what you're doing before we can troubleshoot why it isn't working. Can you provide a procedure for the steps you're taking?

Completely normal. The port is the sorest likely because of the fascia suturing. Try supporting your abdomen with your arm as you move - if you have a pannus, put your arm under it and carry the weight with your arm. If you carry your weight higher, support under the incision. I found that by doing thism, I could alleviate 70 - 80% of the pain while walking. Standing & sitting still hurt, but I'm going to guess it was tolerable within a week. It took me 3 days to get into my own bed and stop living in a recliner.

I love movie trivia. I'm not necessarily good at it. What comes to mind is John Cusack in Say Anything (1989).

Your pain could be coming from your incisions - the port area is normally the sorest since their messing with the fascia. Do you have any relief when you're sitting still? You could also be having gas pains. I had gall bladder removal last month and it took about 2 days for the gas to migrate upwards.

Of course I missed my ladies too! Had a surgery that went well itself, but indirectly lead to some complications that took a bit of time to get over. I'm about 80% now, and it feels great to be there. My mile high clubination was on a 747 over the Atlantic ocean. A huge plane less than half full, as close to pitch black as the 2 or 3 overhead lights people had on would allow. Not a very risque story, but it gets the job done! It was beautiful - we could see the aurora borealis out of the window.

I tried to edit out the last 2 because I really don't think they would surprise anyone to know about me. But I couldn't hack the smileys or having to reformat everything. So instead, just pretend they aren't there.

I don't normally post to threads like this. It always makes me feel a little awkward, like I'm bragging about myself. Hopefully it won't read that way. And I've probably already said most of this in some post or another. Things that might surprise someone… I have no idea if this is current, but at one point I was the youngest survivor of spinal meningitis. I have never been drunk nor high. I am a member of the mile high club. I had plans to be a research geneticist and pursued medical school with this intention. Then a personal & miserable experience with a professor turned me off to the experience so I left and re-enrolled as an art major. If I could change any decision in my life, that would at least tie for first choice. I've had at least 17 broken bones. Not all at the same time. I am as opinionated "in real life" as online, and as detached from the general public. However, I never see online attention as "real" attention, so I am more open with my opinions (repercussions also have something to do with this). In real life, I rarely offer up opinions, unless asked, because they usually bring attention and I abhor anything remotely resembling the spotlight (I'm a fully expressed introvert). I love learning. I have 7 university degrees and am not done, even though I don’t plan to “use” them. I am an advocate for continuing education (in the literal sense). I love learning and plan to continue self-education or taking classes "for fun" as long as I'm able. Things like reading Brian Greene are “fun” for me, even if I don’t really get it, because it’s still learning and offers a challenge. I have bought every Harry Potter book at least 10 times, but I don't think it's that good of a story. I have donated the books to local schools, shelters, and the children centers of local hospitals. This is because I will support anyone who can get millions of kids interested in reading again.

Had my gallbladder out. That went well but I had some problems getting all healthy again. I just rejoined the living yesterday.

You know Bubble, I would hope that people getting the band would have done their homework & have some idea of what to expect. Here's my story, that makes me think otherwise... (adds to it, anyway) I need to have a cholecystectomy. The surgeon who did my band will do this procedure as well. I went in for my conultation this week, and after discussing the current procedure, he said, "So how is your band going? You look good, like it's working well for you." I said, "It's doing its job perfectly, I just need to be better about getting my butt in the gym." Seems benign, no? But then he says, "Well that's not my fault. I can't do anything about that." (And I hope he truly wasn't as defensive as he sounded.) My husband was in the room with me, and when the surgeon left - while we were still waiting for the coordinator to come by and do the scheduling - he mentioned that the surgeon must get a lot of people blaming him for a lack or cessation of weightloss, because he sounded like he was being defensive. Last night I was talking with a lady I know who is banded (about 3.5 years ago) and she commented that, "I haven't really lost anything since the first year. I guess I'm just where I'm going to stay. Unless I get to the gym, or get back on track with my eating." People seem to think that healthy habits are optional. That the bandis going to hand them a goal weight, and all they have to do is content with the occasional fill or PB. It's scary.

All IMO... If a parent is going to stay home, I don't think it should automatically be the mother. Some fathers are much better parents than mothers. Some mothers make a lot more money and have much better benefits than fathers. Some mothers love what they do, while the father is indifferent. You get the idea. If either parent wants to stay at home with their children, go for it. It's the right thing for some people, and not the right thing for others. Whatever you can afford, that fits with your personal values, and that you're comfortable with - have at it. Children raised in daycares turn into exceptional adults every day, as do children raised by stay at home parents.

There are too many individual factors that contribute to weightloss rates to answer "why do some people lose so quickly?" Motivation, individual metabolism, lifestyle, genetic disposition, psychological disposition, luck of the draw... and on... and on... and one of the biggest - how much weight you need to lose. I could say I lost 200# in my first year, but that wouldn't mean you should expect to do the same, especially if I had 600 lbs to lose and you had 50. Almost every piece of literature will gauge progress on a percentage of excess weight lost, and not pounds lost. There's no way I could post everything I've eaten. And I didn't journal it on a public site, so no easy links. As for your other questions: Did you stop eating after 6 or 7? Maybe - if I wasn't hungry after then, but there were many occasions I know I ate considerably later than that. What excercise routine did you do? No set routine. I tried the set routines and they bored me too much. Did you drink alcohol? Sometimes, if I wanted a drink. For me, "I want a drink" means one drink every couple of months. Not a big drinker. Cut sugar? I did in the beginning, didn't worry about it so much later on. How many fills? I didn't keep track of the number of fills. I think what's more important is fill level. I'm at 2.75 in a 4. (IMO it doesn't matter if it took me one fill to get there or 20, what matters is that 2.75/4 is a good place for me). I'm reticent to answer questions like this because often we'll see follow-ups of "I tried what so and so did and it didn't work" -- and it's SO important to go into this understanding that you may be the fasest loser, and you may be the slowest (probably you will be somewhere in between), and that it's all one big learning curve toward figuring out what works for you and what doesn't. There are no "givens" when it comes to what works.

Not sure what you're needing to know out of this. If you want recommendations on how to find the people, I would recommend starting a thread with a desired age in the title (e.g. "Looking for people over 50") but of course you may or may not see that met in the responses. If you want recommendations on band sites specifically for people over 50, I don't know of any off-hand, but perhaps the Yahoo groups might be of some help. See this thread in our feedback & help forum. http://www.lapbandtalk.com/f5/how-get-ticker-your-signature-16218/

What would concern me about this is that they're taking everything word of mouth, and insurance companies don't work word of mouth, they work paperwork. So I wonder exactly what they submitted to your insurance company considereding they didn't even have one piece of medical record that had your weight or confirmed BMI on it. Are you sure you're approved through insurance for the surgery? They may have just meant you're approved for a consultation, or for the seminar maybe if they consider it an office visit or something. To me, it would be completely unheard of to be approved for surgery with no medical records or documentation at all, just anecdotal informatuon submitted via the patient online. Definitely be cautious with this.

I'm not LDS but if you live in Liberty, we're within 10 minutes of each other and I'm relatively familiar with the area surgeons, and 1.5 yrs familiar with the band itself, so feel free to ask any questions you might have.

This is definitely important. I've always known it was important and advocated for it, always, but I'm really starting to see just how important it is. For a long time, I thought this was largely a numbers game, with a few variables thrown in. That's what the science, books, articles, research, and definitely the logic tells you -- consume under your BMR and you will lose weight, pending the anamolies such as plateaus that we're occasionally plagued with. But I think it's way more complicated than that. Long story short - and MHO - the band will do so much. Follow the dietary rules and it will give you some amount of weightloss on its own. After time, regardless of the calories game, it will not give you any more and at that point, you may very well not lose any more unless you step up and begin to try and meet it in the middle.

Make sure you're taking a daily. Potassium is the culprit for me. Other elements can be a cause, too. Also, don't go out and start takings lots of supplements. I've seen people do this reactively - bad thing. Take what you need and what's within safe guidelines, nothing more. Bad, bad things can come out of "harmlessly" taking too many Vitamins, potassium supplements, etc.