SuperDaddy!

When birds fly in the right formation, they need only exert half the effort. Even in nature, teamwork results in collective laziness.

Not everyone gets to ba an astronaut when they grow up.

NO way...the poor grammar, the put-downs...the complete lack of respect. There's no way that this came from a doctor, is there? This must be from an assistant prank, right? I'm dumbfounded that you would get something like this from a doc. He threatens a lawsuit...yet this letter is a case for a defamation of character suit! Yikes! Jon O.

Run....Run far far away. throw it out, don't buy more....grin and bear it for 2 weeks...and you'll be ok. Join our "Chip Club" (check archives for "Who wants some chips"). You get a fancy little icon for your signature line. I just earned one for 30 days with no caffeine. Next...I'm getting away from sugar treats. You can do it, too! Remember...this thing will only work if you work it. I learned that this week...so back on track for me this coming week! God Bless You. Hang in there. Jon

Thanks..I figured it out! My goal is to keep adding crap to my signature until it takes up a whole screen! Jon

Mermaid...I'm there, too...sugar is going to be so much harder to let go of than caffeine. I have my first fill in 2 weeks, and I want to hit 50 lbs before then. Uh, but I need to start counting tomorrow. I'm still cold turkey off caffeine, but let's just say the Krispy Kremes that I had in celebration of a student's birthday were off the menu. But the treats were delicious! ...great, now I have guilt. OK...day one Friday, Mermaid, You game? I have a calendar that I mark on. They say that you only have to something for 2 weeks before you've created a new natural habit. So go go go! And I think I figured out the chip thing...if it's not on my signature by the end of the night...just know that I spent a lot of hours and used bad words trying to figure it out. Clearly you figured it out, Delarla. OK...Hello slumberparties!!! Naughty naughty signature! But it did make me smile See ya', gang! Jon

So I read this book to my third grade class once...and went from Mr. O...a pillar of respect and excellence in education....to Mr. Sloopy Frickenfanny. And yet, somehow...it still fits with my clasroom effectiveness. Ahh...don't you just love 9 year olds?

Wow...it helps to hear that. I have nothing stopping me save my own self-control. And if that was really great...I wouldn't have a band! We'll see what the fill does for me on the 17th!

First...I'd like to thank all the members of the academy. Then...I'd like somebody to tell me what I do with this Chip! I'll try to copy and paste it...but I'm not very efficient at that yet! I earned my chip quick because I had quit caffeine on my own the week before my surgery, which was on the fourth. While, I was sitting at home recovering...I stumbled across our little bandland...and have become a bandland addict (Delarla, we may need to start a 12 step program for email addicts the next time you're in Minneapolis!). So anyway, I did have a head start..and then just stuck with it thanks to your challenge. Now here's the next one...and it's gonna' SUCK BIG TIME! I've been eating garbage. Smaller amounts of it...but garbage, nonethless. I'm going to take the next 30days to remain off caffeine...but I'm adding 30 days with NO SWEETS..... AAAAAAAAAUUUUGH!!!!!!! I hate it already...but after losing 41 pounds since I started teaching this year...I stalled this week with no loss because I have been eating little Snacks. CARPE' SNACKUM....Seize the snacks! Day one...and day 31 no go-juice. Yippee-freakin' skippy. Jon

I DID IT! WAHOOOOOOO! 30 days with no "Go Juice"!!! Where's my chip? Gimme Gimme Gimme, please! Oh...do I feel sixty days with no caffeine next? YES I THINK I DO! Keep on keepin' on, y'all! Jon

Tomorrow (November 2nd) is THIRTY DAYS for me with no caffeine....no more pop...Wahoo! Chip, please....K-ching! (could I have my chip with some cheese and salsa, please?) So no caffeine....but it's a darn good thing I didn't challenge myself with no ice cream! I'll try that next! Keep up the good work, y'all. No giving up, I called it! Jon

Wahoo...more men in the house! Welcome to the club! Congrats to you and best of luck and prayers with you on the 17th! Jon

Call your doctor! If it's after hours, call your insurance nurse line. Most insurance companies have free nurse lines. Did you overeat, or have you had a fill recently? What did you do different today when you ate? Usually, when I read about pain after eating on this site it is from overeating and getting food STUCK. For some people, carbonation is the trick (in small amounts). For others...they wait and let the food work it's way down. Hang in there. I haven't had food stick yet (no fills), so perhaps someone with more experience could help you more. Jon

Well...how do you want your pep talk...sugar coated or between the eyes? Your doc needs all the space he can have in your abdomen to give you a successful surgery. When you lose weight fast, the first thing that shrinks is your liver. That needs to be small and mobile to work around your stomach. Cloey, You are about to have serious abdomenal surgery...so if you're not able to stop eating for the 2 week pre-diet (that's only 4 weekend days)...you're not ready for the surgery. If for no other reason, you have to prove to yourself that you can stick with this thing. I'll be honest with you...the pre-diet was easier for me than right now. Right now I'm down almost 40 pounds, 15 of that is post surgery. But I haven't had my first fill...and I figured out I can eat...something I haven't done much of in three weeks. After having one too many Snacks and little things and having a week with no weight loss, I had to just look myself in the mirror the other day and say..."It's just FUEL! food is NOT worth the way I feel when I repeatedly fail to meet my goals. I'm gonna' WIN today!" All this to say: we've all been there. I didn't like the pre-op diet, either. But my surgeon told me several times that reason my band placement was so easy was because I dropped 12 pounds in the few weeks before. The psychological switch that you make in disciplining yourself to that diet before surgery is equally as important as the results you reach. So make it your highest priority for just a few weeks. It's not an optional step, it's critical! You're not choosing the easy way when you choose surgery, but you're choosing a tool that can help you truly win! This is just a tool, and it will only work if you work it. That work has to start right now, today. Decide that this weekend you're going to succeed. NO EXCUSES! You can do it! Don't give up! (ok that last line I was channeling a pom-pom and cheerleading skirt routine. I'd put it on for you...but it wouldn't be a pretty sight). I'm praying for you to have amazing strength and discipline for the rest of the journey. I pray that for me, too. Jon

Hey Benet- Hang in there. I don't think that you have a pouch yet to ruin, but you have to be careful all the same. I was banded on the 4th of October...so no fill for me, either. They warned me that once I felt better and before the fill...I'd be hungry with little restriction....so I have just tried hard to stick with it! The rewards will be greater than the pain, I promise! You should have seen my friend's faces who haven't seen me for 30 pounds at my church. SO MUCH FUN! And now 39 pounds later I feel so much better already, and I've just begun. Having said all that, I've eaten more than I should a few different times, and although I regretted the cheat...nothing hurt or felt too full. Are you are eating a LOT more than a cup, or are you eating and drinking together, or are you taking huge, "normal" bites??? Maybe you just need to slow down. As far as the pain, I encourage you to call your doctor and ask. You'll hear plenty of advice that's great on this site...but you'll sleep better if you hear from your doctor that everything's great, or that he wants to see you. "Buyer's Remorse" is something we've all felt. Stay the course, be consistent, and you'll reap the reward! Jon

Gerri Halliwel from the Spice Girls...that's totally who you look like in the pic by the car. Lookin' DeLOVELY, Delarla! Keep up the fabulous work. Jon

Try to Google on Poor Baker's Dozen. That's the name of the band. The link is www.poorbakers.com I just tried it and it worked just fine. The site is not regularly updated...but you can at least see what we're all about. The big guy in the group...that would be me. The rest of those skinny pups didn't need a lap-band! Have a great day, bandsters! Jon;-)

Hmmm, sorry ladies, no Gyno stories, no embarrassing farts, and no baby delivery stories! I did bowl a grandma over like a bowling pin, though! Wanna' hear that one? So I sing pro with a band (yeah...when I'm not teaching 3rd graders or selling houses). Anyway, the band had just finished setting up at Landmark Center in St. Paul for a huge holiday concert. We were going up two flights of stairs to the green room and I thought I'd walk while another bandmember took the elevator. We beat him upstairs and I was standing at the elevator door with a huge Water cooler. I thought it would be funny to barrel this water into the elevator at full speed, just as the door cracked open...thus scaring the pants off my buddy. So I did just that. Except my friend was no longer alone on the elevator...and a very sweet grandma-type was bowled flat on her can by a runaway water cooler. Luckily, the poor thing wasn't hurt...but the shreik and face of horror still plays out in my mind. Oh yeah...she was one of the hosts that invited us to perform at the function. Bad Jon, Bad Jon. Lord keeps us humble...one way or the other. Oh yeah...if you want to hear your fellow bandster rock out...check out Poor Baker's Dozen at www.poorbakers.com. Good Night, Y'all! Jon

The God of the Old Testament miracles is still the God of today. He loves that little child, and God's faithfulness is unswerving. If he can part the sea, feed four thousand with a few fish and loaves, and heal the masses, he can heal your son. I will pray for his intercession in this, and for grace and peace for your whole family This too shall pass (uh...no pun intended!!!). Jon

Girl, I have a condo in that neighborhood! I had the band on the 4th of Oct....and yesterday I made Pasta for my kids and helped theme at it (yeah...like more than 3/4 cup). I don't have any restriction either. I kind of wish I didn't know that! Well, I picked myself up, dusted myself off, and started all over agin. It's OK! I bet you "cheated"with a lot less food than you would have before the band! Get back on that horse! Jon

What the HECK is this baseball doing under my skin?!? Seriously, I'm two weeks post surgery...and when I stretch or raise my arms up there is this creepy lump under my skin. Yeah...I know it's the port, but can you tell me if it goes down at all...is it still just inflamed and healing? I just don't want to scare small children on the beach when my soon-to-be-formed six pack has a lumpy alien protuding out. ...I can just hear the children screaming now....oh, no wait, I forgot to to turn my son's night light on! Gotta' jet! Jon

Thanks, y'all! Always good to know that I'm not alone in any of this journey. You gals ROCK! Jon

Megan- I always enjoy seeing your posts. Judging by the responses that have come since you sent this...you can see how many other lives you touch with your encouragement. I was kind of bummed tonight...I'm just two weeks out, but I realized that with the band as yet unfilled, I can easily eat ice cream or other useless treats. I was sitting here thinking, "What a stupid thing...spend all this money only to cheat within a few weeks from this huge surgery." So I've spent time reading through other people struggles and success'...and you are a success. I realized that I have to take this thing to the next level and win! God bless you for your heart and strength. You are an inspiration today! Keep up the good work...and keep posting! Grace and Peace Jon

Thanks Linda! Yeah...I know this whole thing is new, and it's a process. I guess it's all just taking some getting used to. Blessings on your day! Jon

Thanks Renata! Such nice compliments. Recovery IS going good. Keep positive, cling to your source of strength (in my case...my wife and my faith), and it will go great! And weight loss is going great so far, too. I'm down 14 pounds since surgery, I think..and that means 38 total since I first met my third grade class this fall. Wahoo! You have to stick with it, though. I unfortunately figured out that ice cream is no prob for me (wonder how I figured that out!), and my first fill isn't until midNovember...so I have to keep it going without a lot of band help until then....but I got this far. You're going to do great on the first. I'll remember to pray for you! Jon