summerset

It's still awfully slow.

Still doesn't work for me. (Sorry Fluff, you have to wait for an answer, lol)

Yeah, doesn't work so far.

Not sure what more information I'm able to provide. In the end it's just some thoughts and opinions based on personal experience. As for changes I believe that when hard times are coming your way you need your energy for something different than the food/exercise/self-control world. And there seems to be a lot of proof that this is true. Just look at the posts on this board in which people talk about regain and when the regain started to happen. There usually seems to be a stressful event that started the "old habits" again. I also believe that a lot boils down to trust issues in the end. Do you trust yourself with food now? Do you think that you can e. g. ever eat something "bad" at a party or bring "bad" food home and eat it without blowing the whole WLS thing because you're afraid that you will want MORE tomorrow, next week, next month? Do you trust yourself enough that you will take up exercising again after you paused for a week or two because you had a cold? Do you think that without an arbitrary set of strict rules somebody else set for you, you will gain back all the weight and more within the blink of an eye? It might raise your heart rate significantly if you only think about that someone actually suggested that you should "trust yourself" when it comes to issues that have something to do with your body after the whole world told you for decades that you "cannot be trusted". It will definitely throw you out of your comfort zone to trust yourself with body/food issues. Learning to have a certain level of trust in yourself takes work and a big step out of the comfort zone. It's like beginning a new job and acquiring the new skills needed to do that job properly. However, I firmly hold the opinion that it's worth the hassle.

I personally think that you need to put some work into the whole thing before you can relax, e. g. you might have to work on a certain point of view first to make maintenance easier in the long run (or more "effortless" so to say). I'm struggling a bit to find an example regarding this as these things are highly individual but I have to think about a conversation I had today: It's cold and rainy at the moment. I still go to work by bike, so does a colleague of mine. All the nice weather cyclists in our department stopped going by bike. They say "Oh, it's so cold and rainy - we rather go by car or bus or tram." We say: "Oh, we don't want to be crammed into a tram or bus with lots of people in wet coats and wet umbrellas and we don't want to endure the stop-and-go traffic sitting in the car and hunting for a parking lot. Going by bike is the fastest way to get from home to work at rush hour." The problem here is: you really seem to have to believe the things you think about something so telling yourself that plain green salad with cucumber infused water is the yummiest thing in the world and tracking every morsel of food for the rest of your life on MFP is the leisure time activity to do might not work.

Not really sure what to write here. Thing is there is quite a lot of talk about complications from time to time, quite a few people converted from band to bypass, either because of regain or reflux or migration or all these things. Same with the sleeve. Lots of reflux talk from time to time. Everything seems to come in waves somehow. The board is quite litte, not a lot of people writing. The high times of German WLS boards seem to be gone with the wind since a whole while. However, on the German board I sometimes read the dynamic is about the same as here. A lot of judgment about regain, usually coming from successfully losing people a few months out. A lot of fear about regain, the usual struggles with the little gains and the talk about food and exercise and how to "stay motivated in harder times". The everlasting little fights between the "clean eaters" and the "more relaxed eaters". The exercise freaks and the couch potatoes. How to cope with hunger? How to cope with appetite or emotional eating?

Thing is, quite a few people change gears after a couple of years. If they happen to hang around for a time span of several years (I'm talking 5 or more years, even more than 10 years) you can notice how people might change their point of view on several things. Even if they were gone in between for a year or two, some hang around for quite a long time but they're very, very rare. Some gained, some gained significant, some had revisions out of various reasons, some maintained, some struggle with a change of eating disorder... Typical life changers seem to be new partners, having kids, transitioning from university to working, changing over from the working force into retirement. These "big things", you know.

It took awhile for that worry to go away. I needed proof that I don't need to adhere to e. g. tracking and daily/weekly weighing to prevent weight gain but once I had proof... well, life feels more relaxed in the food/weight/exercise section. It's actually quite nice not to worry about how many calories you might burn when doing yoga or going out for a bike ride. Not having a bad conscience when eating certain foods because they're "bad" or skipping an exercise session because you feel like collapsing at your door after a hard work day and not calculating how much you're "allowed" to eat for dinner now because you didn't work out - this is priceless and liberating. But it is and it was to be expected.

This. And what's very interesting is: other users applaud them on their behavior, even envy them.

Then why not try to do what they do? Watch them, learn from them, ask questions. However, it might (or might not) take a leap of faith to let go of old boundaries. What do you mean by "effortlessly" exactly? I think that people have a different understanding of that word and it's also quite different what people view as "an effort".

I personally think living or not living on 500-600 or 800 cals for a prolonged period of time has a major impact on how much you can eat in maintenance without gaining. All the crash diets involving reducing calories to this level make people gain back in the end (or so we were told, right?) but with WLS everything is supposed to be different then? Sure, there are metabolic changes that come with surgery that seem to at least partly prevent that infamous drop in metabolism when losing weight but do they reach as far as completely cancelling out metabolic changes that come with extremely low calorie dieting? I somehow doubt it because if things are too good to be true, they probably are. So in the end people are in the same trap they know only too well and that comes with low calorie dieting, WLS or not. The worst thing about this is: too many WLS teams seem to encourage exactly this restrictive low calorie dieting!

I'm not really sure how to interpret the words I made bold in the quote. Do you want to be maintenance as "natural" as possible or are you looking for ways to view "being strict" as a normal part of everyday life? If it's the later you can save your time and stop reading here. --- I personally think to maintain effortlessly (though I think "effortlessly" means something different for different people) you have to learn to ride certain dragons instead of trying to avoid them. You also have to find a lifestyle you can maintain without much hassle. You, not your neighbor, your colleague, Aunt Ruthie or the Instagram ab-girl that posts about a dozen selfies and food pics per hour so giving tips feels always a bit weird to me. You also need to be (emotionally) flexible enough to suit your needs in different situations, e. g. ideally you respond to phases of lower physical activity with less appetite, e. g. you usually ride your bike to work but during a few weeks in winter it would be too dangerous because of slippery roads and you go by train or car during these weeks. Are you willing to accept a temporary slight weight gain or do you want to seriously interfere with your eating habits and/or up your non-NEAT exercise? Learn to let go of the "tracking". How many thin people do you know in your life who give a flying f*ck about "tracking"? The only people I know who care about tracking calories and burnt calories are people who try to lose weight. You aren't. You want to maintain the status quo. Ask yourself who you want to be. "The WLS patient"? "The formerly obese person?", "The person who doesn't want to be obsessed with this stuff anymore"?, "The health and exercise nut who gets a nervous breakdown every time something interferes with her food or training schedule"? And then act on it.

When it's about non-perishable food items (or something that freezes well) I buy/make enough for us both as well. Learnt that lesson a looooooooong time ago.

Dudes, I'm glad I live lone during the week and have to deal with a husband on weekends only. me: "I'm going to the store - do you want me to buy anything special you want to eat? If so, please put it on "Bring!" so I don't forget." him: "No no, nothing special, just buy what you usually buy. It's fine." (after he arrives at my place on Saturday) him: "Did you buy [whatever food] by any chance?" me: "No, I asked if you wanted anything in particular and you said no." --- A typical variation goes like this: me: "I'm going to buy [whatever costly perishable food he also loves but is inconsistent in wanting it] - do I need to buy enough for you and me or not? Because you know if I buy enough for both of us and you don't want any of it like the last time I have to through the rest out in the end." him: "Nah, I don't want any. Just buy enough for yourself." me: "Ok... Are you sure? Like - really sure you don't want some?" him: "Yes, yes." (after he arrives at my place the next day) him: "Oh, let me have some of this! It looks really good!" me: *explodes*

Of course not because it's bollocks. I was on insulin shots several times a day and I don't need to take any meds since years and yes - I eat carbohydrates (and I don't count them). Real weight gain or the bit of water weight people gain once they introduce more carbohydrates? If the weight gain is real she's gained because her calorie intake is higher than it should be not because she ate "carbs". <rant>People complain that they gain weight every time they eat "carbs". However, it seems that they simply add the carbohydrates on top of what they're already eating. Of course this behavior makes you gain weight - you eat more calories than you're used to.</rant>

Appetite and hunger are two different things. I'm rarely hungry (I have an MGB), but appetite - that's another story.

Yes, it showed that you liked the post. Thanks.

I can see that you quoted my posts in my notifications but I can't see who exactly liked one of my posts, only that someone "reacted to my posts". Looks like this:

I can see that you quoted my posts in my notifications but I can't see who exactly liked one of my posts, only that someone "reacted to my posts". Hm.

Cool. Coffee is the winner! (Not that I'm drinking too much of that stuff or something...)

I'm asking because it doesn't seem to work.

Hopefully you can stick with approach. Contrary to what a lot of people seem to think "eating what you really want" doesn't mean stuffing your face with junk food until you pass out every single day of your life. I personally think it takes a lot of willpower and stamina and faith in yourself and in the process and approach so you don't get sucked back into the I'm-a-hopeless-food-addict-and-need-to-be-abstintent-for-the-rest-of-my-life world. This is especially hard in the WLS community, at least in one where so many people are immediately or only a few months post-op.

Not for "whatever reason". There seems to be a specific reason when you have chosen to believe into the approach that there aren't foods that are forbidden and need to be avoided at all costs: the sweets are "allowed" now. That's the reason you don't crave them as you used to. This "they're allowed now" makes the sweets less interesting. They're just a food now you can have any single day if you want to. And since the sweets are only for you and you don't have to worry about that they won't be there anymore the minute you really want them there is also no longer the need to "eat them while you still can". People who experimented with the "intuitive eating" approach are most likely familiar with this effect. It's a very pleasant one. I personally think this approach takes a lot of courage. However, I also firmly believe it's the most rewarding one in the long run.

So you're suppose to see now who's liked your posts instead of getting the "somebody reacted to your post"?

All drugs have possible negative side-effects after all. I'd love to get rid of these PPIs as well.