2goldengirl

Congratulations on your success! Definitely track your food, and I agree, you are not eating enough. Make sure the calories you add are Proteins, healthy fats, and complex carbs. These foods not only give you the fuel you need, they stick with you. My other concern is that you mention "everyone in the house is sleeved". Then what is ice cream doing there? I'm inferring that your family are all sleeved - which means that the entire family had unhealthy relationships with food to unlearn. I'd really recommend getting everyone together to talk about this. You all got sleeved to get healthy, and to enable you all to make different choices. It's time for some mutual problem-solving and accountability, with the help of a counselor skilled in bariatric issues if necessary. Good luck!

Don't worry about stretching a new sleeve, it just isn't possible. You've got a lot of swelling yet. You do want to keep to the portion sizes your surgeon dictates, both for healing, and for comfort.

(throws confetti) Yay! Congratulations! What will you do to celebrate?

I promise, you can't stretch a brand new sleeve. What stomach you have left is very swollen and tender. But you're right to stop once you start feeling full, that's what the restriction of the sleeve is supposed to do for you.

He totally gets props for admitting he's scared. Just remind him that you're doing this so you WILL be around for him and for the kids, for a long time to come.

@@CowgirlJane, I have developed a crush on your horse. He sounds like such a love!

Congratulations! Glad you're feeling well, just know you'll tire easily, so rest when you need to. Your body is very, very busy on the inside.

Youth, genetics, and how much you lose govern whether or not you have loose skin left over, and how much. Certainly having a fit set of muscles underneath will help the sppearance, but whether or not you get it is really outside of your control. I agree that with your degree of concern over it, it would be wise to start saving now for plastic surgery. I know I am, because I know up front I will need and want it. I'm not young, and my future loose skin won't bother my husband in the least, but it will bother me, so I'm saving for it. The other thing to understand is that while you're in the period where you are waiting to get your surgery done, it's really common to have concerns about the "what-if"s. If it weren't loose skin, it would be something else, and in time there may be other concerns that worry you more than the skin issue does now. That's entirely normal, because you're waiting to make a big change in your life. Just know that once you're no longer waiting, other things will occupy your mind. Good luck on your journey!

That depends on whether you're taking narcotic pain medication, and how sore you are getting in and out of the car. Your doctor may tell you not to drive for the first two weeks, for example, but that's typically because of the pain medication.

@@amandasue, I'm so sorry this happened to you. You're feeling down and who can blame you? You miss your babies and your husband and feeling well. You feel guility because you made this decision that is now inconveniencing everyone around you and costing more than you'd bargained for. Just remember, you had surgery so you can be healthy long-term for your children and your husband. And you will be. You will heal, and you will get on with your life. And your life will be much, much healthier because of all this.

Here is a link to your health plan requirements: https://www.empireblue.com/medicalpolicies/policies/mp_pw_a053317.htm If your BMI is > 40, it doesn't matter about your comorbidities. Maintain your weight and you're fine.

Because you've been a real friend to her, and when you needed her to be a friend to you, she wouldn't. And it hurts. And she wasn't a friend to your gelding, either, and that hurts worse. I have a friend who has horses (I don't), and I love them. She knows if hers ever need anything I'll do it. Loving a horse is like loving a human, it requires responsibility.

Tell him yes, yes you DO. Everyone is different. This is your body, and your journey. Tell him you need his respect. Is he overweight? If he isn't, he has absolutely no idea the struggle that being overweight is on a daily basis. It's HARD. And if that isn't his reality, he can't understand it in the same way he can't understand what it feels like to be female. Tell him you need him to respect that this is your body, and your decision, and that you have made this decision as investment in your health, and your future together. I hope he comes around.

You are most definitely not eating enough. I'd back off a bit on the exercise (maybe do an active rest day in place of one day of workouts), and increase your intake maybe 100 calories/day for a few days. See what happens. You aren't going to have some big gain all at once. You sound fearful - afraid to eat, afraid not to work out intensively. If you read these boards, you learn that the folks who are successful long-term have learned to understand balance. They've learned to treat themselves, and their bodies, not just with respect and discipline, but kindness. You're working very hard on the fitness part, but your body needs fuel as well as work to achieve your fitness goals. Good luck!

Have you told him how his comments make you feel? If you haven't, you should.

What's telling for me in this is your very first words were "I'm doing this wrong". And I think you're right, the roots of that may lie in your self-esteem issues. Once upon a time, I had trouble accepting compliments. Someone I was close to taught me: "it's a compliment. Smile and say thank you." Try it, the more you practice, the better you get at it. Then you can work on the other stuff, the letting the compliments in, the accepting yourself and your accomplishments. You might try saying "thank you for noticing. I've been working hard." Because you have.

You can probably Google your health plan's medical policy to find out: "nameofhealthplan state medical policy bariatric surgery" I am not aware of any health plans that don't require some kind of documentation of how long you've been overweight, and what else you've tried and not been successful. They all just word it differently. Good luck!

Good heavens, who was facilitating this meeting? That's unbelievable! Our group is facilitated by the MSW and RD's who are with my program (though it's open to anyone). That kind of behavior simply wouldn't have been tolerated. I'm so sorry! I hope there is a more suuportive group you can attend.

I'm SO glad to see this thread! I looked into metabloic testing more than ten years ago. It was expensive and not widely available. I decided recently that the technology must surely have improved, and it has. I also found that I can drive an hour away from me to UC Davis Sports Medicine Clinic and have my RMR, active exercise metabloics, and functional movement tested, plus get recommendations from an exercise physiologist. I have long suspected that my metabolism is low - I want to know HOW low. And I want to know what weight loss postop plus improved fitness will mean as I am able to become more active postop. I have lumbar scoliosis which means I have one hip higher and one shoulder lower on one side. I want someone who really knows what they're doing to help keep me out of trouble at the guym, because injury layoffs are a big drag. All the advice we're given from our surgeons and dieticians is based on guesstimates of our RMR plus activity done via algorithm. For once in my life I'd really like to work with real, rather than imaginary, figures.

Here's the thing. The people who answer the phone for your insurer usually aren't the same people who are actually doing the reviewing the request. All they can see is a status on a computer screen. So if their status choice is only "pending clinical", "approved", or denied", they only know what they see on the screen. There is no excuse for rude, but all the same, you're approved! Celebrate! Throw confetti!

No, you can't. A benefit exclusion is a benefit exclusion, pure and simple. The reason your insurer won't budge on this is because they'd have to spend all their time reviewing requests for exceptions for everything, not just bariatric surgery. If they covered it for you, that would open the door to having to cover it for a lot of other people. You do have the private pay option, which includes not having to meet insurance requirements pre-op, just your surgeon's requirements. There are some people without the benefit for bariatric surgery who have gotten their surgery partially covered if they also require a hernia repair, usually a hiatal hernia. I'm sorry.

Very interesting. This would explain why people who do change it up in order to keep themselves fresh may be more successful. It's a small study to be sure, but it will be interesting to see more on this!

Welcome aboard! The stubborn thing can work for you, or against you. You can stubbornly commit to your goals, just avoid stubbornly avoiding following directions

March 10 here. 41 days and counting!