Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

MamaJava

LAP-BAND Patients
  • Content Count

    446
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by MamaJava

  1. MamaJava

    Regrets

    I know one of the major issues that made this lapband process so disheartening for me, is that I can't eat most "good" foods. I never realized that could happen...until it happened to me. The healthy, beautiful foods that I love are rejected by this band. I have a 9cc band and couldn't eat chicken (not even pureed) after a 2cc fill...but needed 6 cc or more to get proper restriction. So not only has chicken been eliminated, but so have eggs, whole grains (anything, doesn't matter), some cheeses, most veggies (lettuce, Beans, peas, celery...almost everything). I slime, I get chest pressure/pain, and OUT they come in some of the most violent PB episodes ever known to mankind. My doc seems to think it's ME. Even in puree form way back at 2cc's, I had to completely eliminate most of them. Some days I can get fish down, some days I can't. What CAN I eat? Well...let's see: pudding Frozen yogurt oatmeal (rolled oats only, steel cut=PB every time) Skim milk fruit (almost all are well-tolerated) Yogurt smoothies Soup (puree only/no chunks of anything) Yep...that's about it. Now you tell me how someone is supposed to live like that for life? My doc won't remove my band...he's says it's too invasive and he keeps sending me to nutrition classes. But they keep telling me junk that I already know! I would LOVE to eat how they tell me I'm supposed to be eating. I would LOVE IT. In fact, my problem to begin with was never the quality of foods I ate to reach obesity (I don't like sweets very much, avoid sugar at all costs, salt makes me swell like Goodyear on parade, I've never fried foods EVER...baked or broiled only in EVOO only)...it was the QUANTITY. The above list of what I CAN eat are all slider foods. Notice that? The fullness isn't there. Ever. Well the quantity has been eliminated by the band. But it doesn't matter because they are all slider foods anyway. So, therein follows the horrific feeling of walking around 24/7 with loud growling eminating from my gut. I take Vitamins. I still have black circles under my eyes if I don't cover it with makeup. I exercise. I exercise well. In fact I LOVE my elliptical machine. I LOVE taking long speed walks. I LOVE swimming. I even LOVE my Richard Simmons videos. Resorted to P90X for awhile because I thought killing myself through grueling, impossibly horrific exercise was the way to lose the weight. Honestly, I wanted to set my own face on fire after 2 months of the scale not moving with P90X. My surgeon doesn't care. He thinks I must be doing this band thing all wrong. If he suggests even one more time that I go to a Nutritionist, I'm going to pull this band out myself through my throat. I've cried to him...he tells me I'm not chewing enough. I'm not even able to eat foods I have to chew!!! (except for the oatmeal and fruit but I'm OBVIOUSLY chewing those correctly because they are going down). Yes I get enough calories to lose weight. I've had my trainer and my nutritionist help me with that as well. I gained back 20 pounds and I've been holding steady and not gaining anymore back...but I'm not worried about gaining. I just want to LOSE. I'm not angry with anybody here. I'm angry with myself and with my surgeon. I'm angry that I don't know what to do and I feel so stuck...and alone. So why have I only lost 24 pounds in 3 years??? Why does my band reject all of those beautiful, filling, protein-filled, high fiber, HEALTHY foods? He doesn't seem to think it's an issue. "So just replace 2 meals a day with high-Protein shakes,
  2. I wish I would have had it better explained to me that the feeling of "fullness" with a lap band is very different than "fullness" without one (or with a regular person's stomach). I didn't know that a full pouch would be more like a pressure in the chest (or what most people would probably go to the ER for if they felt that sort of pressure without a band. The dang thing HURTS). It's uncomfortable and should be avoided at all costs. I also wish it would have been explained to me that the "right" foods (high Protein foods like chicken, eggs, whole grain breads, etc.) would be impossible for some bands to tolerate (like MINE!). Therefore, the Protein shakes or other means of protein MUST become a part of my diet for life...and they may become a part of yours for life as well. I am prevented from following a completely wonderful and healthy diet because of my band. I can't even do them in puree form on my lowest fill level. SAD and a major source of discouragement for me. This "tool" does not work the same way for everybody. Not even close. I have people try to tell me how to do it "the right way"...but these fellow bandsters do not take into consideration that maybe...just maybe...my body might be tolerating this band in a completely different way than theirs. I wish I would have known that prior to taking this huge step as well. Honestly, I never woulda done it. Weight loss is slow. I've only lost 24 pounds in 3 years since receiving my band. I don't feel it works for everybody. Not even the best or most compliant bansters. It simply does not always work. This band stuff is a complete and total gamble. Period.
  3. MamaJava

    Regrets

    I have to be honest. I guess I'm in the minority. I hate my Realize Band. I wish I never would have gotten it. That "full" feeling everybody talks about is not like really being full. It's an uncomfortable chest pressure. It's not a full feeling...so once the pressure goes away, I'm left still feeling hungry. I guess I have severe issues with head hunger...and my food addiction was far to strong to get this band. I slipped once and I haven't lost anything since getting refilled after the slip. I've gone back to the original "good bandster rules" and continue to gain. of course...my surgeon thinks I'm lying and cheating my way through this band, and THAT MUST be why I'm unsuccessful. Boy...do I WISH that was really the case. *shrug* Again...I'm probably in the pathetic minority. I wish like heck I woulda listened to the first surgeon who didn't recommend the band because he thought my eating disorder was far too deep for the band. I WISH I WOULD HAVE LISTENED TO THAT GUY. Krista
  4. I have not been successful with my band. I received my Realize band on 01/04/08 and have only lost 24 pounds in 3 years. I am a complete and total failure. I feel my eating habits resemble serious, deep addiction more than anything. I also hate that no amount of calorie counting, exercise or extreme dieting have been successful with this band. I feel I was misled and given completely false information by my Barix Clinic prior to my banding. I don't feel I'm taken seriously when I cry about my addiction to them. I thought this band would help me to feel full as long as I followed the "rules". I thought if I followed the rules (I'm NOT a rule-breaker), then I would be successful at least by the 3 year mark! This has never been the case. This band is painful with each bit of food I chew and swallow. Smaller bites don't even help. My band slipped (concentric slip...up and over like a mushroom) before Christmas. They did a complete unfill and I gained 20 pounds. When I went back to have it filled again, I didn't feel restriction at all until 7cc's were back in...and then absolutely PAIN and inability to even swallow my saliva. He removed 1cc and all is well because I can eat again...but back to eating anything again...eating right through the band becuase the restriction is not there at all for some foods (i.e. all the BAD foods)...and completely causing pain and inability to eat for the RIGHT foods. I am a complete and TOTAL failure and I feel my addiction was far to great to receive the band. i picked the wrong surgery. I don't know what to do. I'm considering Bypass but what if that doesn't work either? Am I just always going to be this fat, horrific-looking blob of a woman? I'm crying each and every time I'm alone, and putting on a front to hide the embarrassment of my failure. I know people are questioning why I haven't lost any weight. I KNOW they are questioning because they are verbally asking me. I just want someone to buddy up with me and help me figure out my next move. I've already made up my mind that I can not live with this band. I would like to see about revision but how deeply gruelling is the process to get approval? I have BCBS insurance. At one point I had lost 48 pounds and never got any further...put almost all of it back on again in 1/4 of the time it took me to take it off. Please help me, because my surgeon doesn't give a rat's rear end about me. He surely thinks I'm a joke and a failure. I'm begging someone to please help me. ~Krista
  5. No I would not do it again. I don't understand why it works so well for so many. I have pain and get stuck constantly, and when I'm not getting stuck, then I have zero restriction. Only down 65 pounds in over 2 years...and that's only from dieting my butt off and exercising more than I ever have in my whole life. Has nothing to do with this band. I got the wrong surgery. Regretting that I was too afraid for Bypass. Either that, or my surgeon (who gives every single patient the Realize Band) simply used the wrong band on me. I hate this so much. I have embarrassing jealousy over ever other Lapband patient I know, who've lost tons of weight in less than a year. Why not me? I'm a goooooooood patient and I don't break rules. This is just junk on my stomach. :thumbup:
  6. OMG...I'm gonna keep it real because you and I have a history. So I'm gonna break it down for you right now: You are an above-average success case for the lap band. You seem to forget how fast you've done this...and how many people would give their left arm to be as successful as you have been. You may feel like you've gotten lazier or begun to slip backwards, and that's good that you catch yourself before it gets worse. However, you really haven't. You haven't gained anything. In fact, your body was losing weight SO FAST that it probably was happy to take a little plateau "break". This is not a race. It's a lifetime change and commitment. Why must you push yourself to lose 150 in one year? Do you even realize how fantastic you've done??? So here...TAKE my left arm...you can HAVE it if you will please pass your success on to me. I'm 16 months out of surgery and have only lost 68 pounds. Do you have any idea how I would love to be in your shoes? Ok...before anybody thinks I'm being too hard on him...you don't know that I have earned a right to speak to him this way...and he knows it. :confused:
  7. MamaJava

    Public Service Message

    I totally needed this today. Oh my, that was some funny reading!
  8. MamaJava

    How much to have band removed?

    I wasn't misconstruing anything. Her words were rude. Flat out. What she said was a direct statement presented as a fact. No, not everybody gains all their weight back. However, by saying exactly this: "Can't fathom removing it unless it's causing you problems because you'll end up regaining everything you've lost" indicates that she knows exactly what will happen. "You'll" means "YOU WILL". It was a snide comment. I wasn't calling names. Saying somebody made a rude comment is not me performing a "juvenile" name-call. I did not call her any childish names. It's a common term. Please...get serious. It only became drama when somebody else came along and pointed fingers at my post and started dancing around it. I have a right to defend somebody's post, and I have the right to call somebody out when I think they are being rude. That's all it was. I wasn't crying in my Cheerios or having an attack over it.
  9. I'm excited! This is my first challenge here on LBT, so I'm looking forward to seeing if I will be successful in challenging myself. Good luck, everybody!
  10. MamaJava

    How much to have band removed?

    The previous poster had a rather presumptuous response if I do say so myself. Perhaps SunsetWatcher hasn't lost anything. Did you think of that? So saying he/she would "gain back everything" may not even apply here. Maybe nothing has been lost. Perhaps SunsetWatcher has lost a lot, and had trouble with the band...NOT EVERYBODY gains all the weight back. Seriously. How rude. SunsetWatcher: The best way to find out is only by contacting your insurance company directly and they can give you a figure...IF it is covered at all. Unless it is a medical necessity, it's typically not covered at all. Therefore it would be completely out of pocket and require a loan, unless you have the funds available to you already. Good luck with your research.
  11. MamaJava

    Whats wrong with Chat.

    I'm getting the same error. Apparently CHAT is down, but there are no status messages on the home page letting us know this info. It would be nice if and when technical issues are happening, LBT posts them on the LBT home page or something like that. Now I'm wondering how long it will be until we can get in? Has anybody even seen this thread in order to fix chat for us?
  12. Hey - I can't log into chat. Is it down?

  13. Prior to banding, when I would reach diet plateaus, I would know exactly why I was in a plateau and exactly how to change it to start losing weight again. Of course, I got banded to avoid the "giving up" that ultimately always happened after significant weight loss successes in my life. I always, always regained. Why on earth do these bands cause us to experience such long plateaus for seemingly no reason? Especially when weight losses are slow and steady, and there is no real reason for a body to plateau? I began a new workout regimen on January 5th. Today is March 9th and even while working with a Trainer, keeping my calorie intake near perfection, drinking my fluids like a good bandster, and eating all the right foods, I HAVE NOT LOST ONE POUND. Not one, since beginning a brand new workout routine. I even vary it up week to week so that my body will experience new things and hopefully shock me into a loss. But...NOTHING. My trainer is getting horribly frustrated. He's never once seen this happen...and he is curious to learn why. Of course, I'm crying all the time and wanting to rip this thing out of me. Does it act like a plug??? Is it hindering my weight loss efforts? I should be losing big time right now with my lifestyle and with my amazing dedication. I'm like Superfly Superwoman over here. I'm unstoppable. I can say, without any shadow of a doubt, that this is not my fault. I've blamed myself for years, because I had nobody to blame but myself. This time, it's not me. So I"m looking for a reason why. If I knew the reason for these long, frustrating, troubling, upsetting and debilitating plateaus, then perhaps I could figure out a way to break through it. Without a reason or an explanation, I feel helpless and like a big fat dummy who got duped. So maybe I sound harsh. I have a right to get frustrated and get angry sometimes. That's all this is. Yes I'm happy I've lost 56 pounds in a year. Sure. I'm not happy that since I've kicked it into high gear, I've not lost 1 single solitary pound. NOT ONE. That's not right. Not by any standards. So can someone give me some sound information that might chill me out a bit? Because right now, I'm feeling like a fool for believing in this tool. I'm about ready to visit my trainer for week #10 and the scale still hasn't moved, and I'm gonna see it on his face and I'm gonna break down in tears in front of him again and he's going to question what I'm going wrong at home...again...when in reality I'm not doing anything wrong at home. I swear on all that is holy. I'M DOING EVERYTHING RIGHT...FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE.
  14. You look great! Love the new 8 month pic. You are putting me to shame. You are actually skinny. UGH. I think I hate you. :) By the way, I'm in the blasted chat room EVERY DAY, and we always miss each other. Can we ever be in there at the same time? Everybody laughs at me in there cuz I'm always just missing you when I log in and ask if they've seen you. LOL I'm in there in the afternoons and again in the evenings.

  15. Finally! I was getting so worried. Yes, there are only 4 pics of me in there. The before pic of body, one of face, then one progress pic of body and one progress pic of face. Thanks for saying you can tell. It helps so much. I'll post a new one every 10 pounds from now on, IF that keeps happening! This plateau is driving me insane right about now.

  16. Starting to worry about you. I've been logging into chat everyday looking for you. I've put some -56 weight loss pics in my profile...please tell me if you notice a change from the PRE-op pic that is in there. It's the one where I'm holding a pie LOL, taken 2 months before surgery. Not full body, but I wouldn't let anybody take pics of my body so it's the best I could do. Anyway...you knew me best ...I'll just leave it at that. LOL!!!

  17. MamaJava

    Why huge plateaus after banding??

    A friend also told me recently to check out a latest rant by Jillian, the trainer from Biggest Loser...so I did. She FREAKED OUT about people stating that muscle weighs more than fat, and that's why people don't see scales move when they begin rigorous workout routines. So, I looked into that and found that she was right...there is no basis behind that. Muscle burns the fat...so even if I was building the muscle, it should be burning the fat double-time. That theory is blown away. It can't be the muscle issue. I'm updating here. I still haven't lost a pound. I'm in my 12th or 13th week of this plateau now (I've lost track). I dumped my trainer on Monday. I've given up on that route. It was too emotionally draining. I was humiliated. I got this band because I was sick of humiliation...so I was humiliating myself even more by stepping on that scale each week in front of somebody. I've chilled on my workout, but I've noticed I've been eating a little bit more...slipping back into old habits out of mild depression from this upset. I found myself "accidentally-on-purpose" omitting some foods on FitDay tracker last week and this week. So I have to stop that. I have to face everything head on if I'm going to win. I'm back to my old ways of "Foods From the Earth", which worked for me back in the old days, before banding ever entered my mind. Maybe if it worked pre-band, it will work extra-well WITH my band? BAsically, it's all foods that are derived mainly from the earth, void of processing (at least 90% void), and mostly raw (except those that must be cooked for safety). These foods include meat, Veggies, Fruit, Whole Grains (oatmeal mostly since I can't eat bread), and dairy products (only slightly processed through necessary means). NOthing boxed or non-perishable, except the oats, and except for the occasional dip for raw veggies. I will update (if anybody cares :scared2:) in a few weeks. Thanks for all your kind words and your understanding. I honestly appreciate every word. I love this place. I need to get it all out in type to really analyze things sometimes. I still feel alone, as I can't really get my docs or nutritionists or whoever to take me seriously...and my banded friends are losing mass amounts of weight and blowing my big butt out of the Water. So...I really need to do this so I don't go freaking crazy.
  18. MamaJava

    Why huge plateaus after banding??

    Yeah, I've tried the calorie changes, as advice from my nutritionist. She thinks I'm lying to her or something. It's frustrating when I'm showing her my food logs and she's questioning if they are real because they "look so perfect". I went up to 2000 calories per day at one point, thinking I'd just gain back a few pounds and then lose them again...but that didn't even happen. I didn't gain, and I didn't lose. I was banded a long time ago. I never said I wanted this to be a speed race. I would just like to see a couple pounds lost as a reward or result of my significant work and efforts. In real diet life, that happens. I just don't understand why that doesn't happen in banded life. Steady....steady is the key word here. It's not steady by any means. It's sporadic and sudden and without explanation. That is not conducive to proper weight loss success, IMO. If, in doing the same type of dieting and exercising used to produce slow and steady (and rewarding) results PRE-band, why does my body not behave the same way POST-band? What did this band to do warp my body? I've talked to my surgeon a lot. He says it's just "how it is" and that the weight will come off when it's good and ready. He acts like it must be something I'm doing wrong. So, I can't get him to take me seriously. Either he is a jerk, or I'm crazy. So I sit here lost and turning to you guys, where in turn, I get made again to feel like I'm crazy, or lying, or that I haven't talked to the right people (not talking about you specifically, who've responded to me already, just in other threads I've posted about this and in the chat rooms). If I can't get support here, and if I can't get support from my doctor or my nutritionist or my trainer...then I sit here all alone again. So, my posts seem helpless and bizarre and probably a bit wordy and crazy...but I'm so lost and troubled right now.
  19. PapaJava or JavaPapa would be a GREAT name. ;)

  20. My doc has never once mentioned being at high risk for band erosion or slipping. I've only ever heard about these things by coming to this website...where now I am scared out of my wits. I PB a LOT. I'm not too tight...doc has checked. I've lost 50+ pounds and am 1-year out...a little over 1 month past my 1 year Bandiversary at this point. Some days, my band is perfect and I can eat and feel perfect restriction, get proper signals from my body, and all is well. Other days, it's hell. I can't eat a thing without feeling pain or getting stuck. Even weird things have gotten stuck, like oatmeal or shredded cheese or even green pepper after being chewed to mere pulp (they are juicy and watery and never have problems with them normally). Bread is pretty much gone from my diet completely - and so is any white flour substance, especially tortilla shells or chips. No problem, I can deal with that. So should I fork out the cash to request an Xray from my doc? I PB probably an average of 3 times per week, though I've had really bad days where I've PB'd 3 times in one day. Other days, this band is pure perfection. So I know I'm not too tight. Doc has never suggested checking. Not sure why. I'm very concerned...yet he doesn't seem to be. I'm a good patient. My bites are teeny-tiny. They really can't get much smaller unless I stop eating completely. I avoid sticky foods cuz I've learned my lesson and I'd rather not make myself miserable. I don't enjoy the pain of getting stuck, or the disgusting act of PB's...so trust me when I say I'm following all the right rules. Are there any signs that I can check myself for that might indicate band erosion or slippage? Should I be concerned or should I just carry on as I have been and not worry about anything until something really does happen that I know for sure? :biggrin:

PatchAid Vitamin Patches

×