Clementine Sky

I'm an English professor and get twitchy when I read posts I've written (mainly from my phone) that are pockmarked with errors, but I think most people on the internet are more relaxed and expect such mistakes. Plus, it can be comical to read some of the autoincorrect mishaps. My sister-in-law just wrote a Facebook post abut having accidentally spilled a pot of human beings all over the kitchen floor. She meant ham and Beans, but autocorrect was in a mischievous mood. I think the policy of putting a time limit on when posts can be edited is fair, though. It's actually generous. I help to moderate the private community forum for my university, and it's common for the manufacturers of drama to then edit out their post and just be an audience to the ruckus they caused. Sadly, the faculty posters are just as likely, if not more so, to be the authors of such posts as the teenage undergrads. Everyone choses usernames to go by on the board, but moderators can see their email addresses used to log in. If only shaking your head counted as exercise, haha.

There are various "recipes" for shakes that you can find online, and some are surprisingly yummy. I like Unjury's chocolate Protein shake with a little PB2 powder blended in, or a Torani sugar free syrup. If you haven't checked out the blog "The World According to Eggface" I recommend popping over and looking at her shake recipes. Starting about a week out I began making smoothies using a Greek or Bulgarian yogurt that is high in protein and low in carbs and some frozen fruit. It felt more like a "normal" meal to me. Dr. Matthew Weiner is a bariatric surgeon who has a video on YouTube about the "set point smoothie" that he recommends to his patients. I also like adding GENEPRO or another unflavored Protein Powder to Crystal Light. For me finding things to look forward to and distract myself was beneficial during recovery. I took advantage of the time off to binge watch several shows everyone raves about that I'd never had time to watch, read some great books, and got little treats like fresh flowers and candles that add a simple pleasure to the day. That helped me to take my mind off food. I had cravings for things that first week that I haven't desired at all ever since. Head hunger is totally normal, and for most people it lessens with time.

I began to lose hair and experience breakage around four months post-surgery, but it wasn't dramatic or noticeable to anyone else. I stopped washing and drying my hair daily and instead washed it every third day to minimize strain. On the days when I wasn't washing it, I just wore a shower cap and then sprinkled on a little dry shampoo to freshen it. I also apply hair masks a couple of times a week that are for damaged and breaking hair. If you're in a pinch, coconut oil can help. Just apply it once a week, put a shower cap on and a towel on your shoulders to catch the drip, and leave it in for half an hour or so. Nioxin hair products have been helpful to me. I haven't taken Biotin or any other Vitamins for my hair because I have PCOS and am acne-prone. Biotin caused a horrific breakout in the past. Losing weight slowly has helped to minimize hair loss, and I also don't have any loose skin. I added in a reasonable amount of healthy carbs (more fruit, vegetables, oatmeal, quinoa) and slowed my weight loss a bit while also making my diet more sustainable long-term.

Her comments are passive aggressively malicious and entirely inappropriate. This isn't your sister or your best friend since childhood, and even if she had that vital, intimate role, she still wouldn't be the one living in your body and leading your life. Only you know can fully understand your own experiences and your own reasons for having the surgery. Perhaps she would like to have the surgery but doesn't have the means for it, or has an unsupportive spouse or something of that nature, and her comments are fueled by jealousy she's trying to disguise as concern. I'm a very sensitive person and would have a hard time not being affected by comments like that, too, but do try to not let them steal your happiness. I would just very politely but firmly tell her that if you ever are needing her input or advice you will be sure to go to her and let her know, but while at work you really want to focus on work. If she ever tells you that others are talking about you, tell her that it reminds you of a quote by Eleanor Roosevelt. "Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people." She also said that no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Do not give that consent to this woman or anyone else. You have every reason to be proud of your achievements.

I'm in Santa Monica, SoCal, and had the VSG last August in Tijuana.

Ironically, I've broken plateaus by eating a bit more than typical for a bit, and having small indulgences. I was stalled out before going on a vacation to Australia, and had anticipated seeing a higher number when I stepped back onto the scale upon my return home. It was actually lower than it had been in a month. I went down a whole jeans size while there. I didn't gorge or throw all caution to the wind, but I didn't log in every bite to MyFitnessPal like I do as part of my everyday routine. I ate sensibly but not overly restrictively. I didn't work out either, but we were on our feet exploring most of the day. On my second vacation post-surgery, and during visits from family when we were eating out a bit more the same pattern repeated itself. I think I'd been too regimented and too restrictive during my daily routine. For me, I'm not really the type to fall down a slippery slope. I can deviate from the path a little without losing my footing. If you are worried that you might overdo things, you could simply try adding a couple hundred calories a day to experiment and see how it impacts your weight. Adding in some more activity could help as well. I got a bike and started using it to ride to the grocery store, post office, etc, instead of driving. It's a mellow way of adding in more movement. Congrats on losing the 25 pounds! It's an accomplishment.

I began having smoothies about two weeks post op using either a plain yogurt (Greek, Icelandic, or Bulgarian) that is high in Protein and low in carbs or plain kefir as the base. I most often use frozen fruit rather than fresh for the convenience, and my favorites are raspberries (high in fiber), nectarines, and the mixed berries from Trader Joe's. If I'm adding spinach or kale I also use it frozen. Del Monte has a fresh peach cup that is no sugar added, and only has 12 carbs. If I'm going to a regular grocery store vs. Trader Joe's or Ralph's I'll stock up on them for smoothies. Trader Joe's also has frozen sweet potato cubes that are delicious in smoothies, and lower in carbs than some fruit. I make those with Fairlife milk. A bariatric surgeon named Dr. Matthew Wiener has a video on YouTube about the "set point smoothies" he advocates.

I had small, fiercely itchy welts around the incisions because of an allergic reaction to the tape that was used on the bandages. Removing the tape (at that point it was safe for me to do so) and putting a tiny dab of hydrocortisone cream on helped.

I haven't eaten any of the crackers I used to love, like Wheat Thins, in the eight months since I had the VSG. I do like Scandinavian-style crispbread that has the consistency of a cracker but is lower in carbs. I'm also much less likely to eat more than one serving. My favorite is actually from IKEA, but there's another brand called Wasa that is available at grocery stores and World Market. By itself it tastes like cardboard, but with toppings it adds that satisfying crunch. I'll have it with Peanut Butter, a poached or scrambled egg, with cheese, or as the base on an open-face sandwich.

My husband is a physician, and I had anticipated him balking at the idea of me having surgery in Tijuana. He did at first, but then he mulled it over, did some research, and willingly got on board. It's actually quite common for SoCal residents to go to Mexico for medical care because there are qualified surgeons and doctors, and reputable facilities there for a fraction of the cost. My parents are the only other ones who know about it, and they had the same reaction. They became fully supportive once I laid everything out. We live in LA, and the surgeons I consulted with here charge between $29,000 and $35,000 for the VSG. We're relatively young and still paying off his massive med school loans, and it was just too hefty to be feasible. Insurance wasn't going to pay for a cent of it because I didn't meet the criteria with my BMI. If they had covered it, my out of pocket expenses would have been around $5000, and it would have required a minimum of a year to get approved and land a surgery date. My surgery in Mexico was $4200, and that included my hotel stay at the Marriott before and after the surgery, and all medicine. We are just a couple hours away, so we drove down there and back easily. If you're not within a reasonable driving distance, you'll have to factor in the cost of flights. My parents came with me, and we also paid for their hotel room. It was reasonable, and they enjoyed the hotel. They could have stayed in my room at the clinic for free, but they were more comfortable at the Marriott. My follow up has simply been through my endocrinologist, who was the one who'd suggested the surgery to me because of its ability to help women my size (14 before surgery) and age (early 30s) with fertility. She arranged for me to see a nutritionist who has consulted with bariatric patients who have PCOS. Those costs are covered by my insurance, so my only expenses are my $35 per visit copay.

It seems to require a lot more time and hoop jumping to get a date if you're going through insurance. I had really positive experience having surgery in Mexico, and was able to schedule it precisely during the time when I wanted it to be. If my insurance was going to cover it (they wouldn't because my BMI was too low), It would have taken over a year to complete all their requirements and then for an in-network surgeon to schedule the date. I just wanted to throw it out there that if you really want flexibility with your date, having the surgery with a reputable surgeon in Mexico is worth considering. It was virtually stress-free for me.

Your after picture made me smile because you are clearly so happy. As you should be. Congratulations on the excellent work. You look fantastic!

I began to notice more of my hair falling out about four months post-VSG, but it was light enough that I was the only one who noticed it. There was more hair clogging up the sink and shower, but it still didn't amount to enough of a loss from my head that anyone else would be aware of it. And I have a close friend who is the overly observant and frank type who would have asked me directly about thinning hair if it was significant. In the past I've had hair loss due to hypothyroidism and from an antidepressant I briefly took when I was grieving, and loss plus breakage from an awful hair product (stay away from John Frieda's Go Blonder spray at all costs!) and each time she pointed it out and asked with horror what had caused it. Fortunately this time it wasn't noticeable enough for her to take notice. I've lost weight at a much slower pace than many others here, and I think that's why I haven't experienced as much hair loss. I started out with a fairly low BMI. I've still reached all of my goals I've set out for myself for the first year, but they've just taken a bit longer. I drink plenty of Water and get at least 60 grams of Protein in daily. I only take Vitamin D and a Multivitamin. I've taken Biotin in the past and had horrific cystic acne breakouts. It was like unleashing a beast on my face. So I skipped the biotin this go around. I recommend that anyone with PCOS or a history of acne use it with caution.

Thanks for the tip! I haven't lost much hair, but in the past year it's started to grow in so much darker. I'm a natural blonde but now have brown roots, so I might look to see if that spray comes in a color that matches my hair. I've been reluctant to dye it because I'm nervous it could cause damage.

Congratulations! You look fantastic, and you definitely should be proud of yourself.

I think a consideration to keep in mind is how each of us responds to tempting foods that are fattening and lacking in much nutritional value, like cake. My sister-in-law said that it's far easier for her to completely avoid even a bite of something like a brownie or other rich dessert because she has a "as long as I'm wet, I might as well dive all the way in" reaction to it and overindulges. Instead of just having a tiny portion to satisfy the desire for a taste, she uses it as a reason to go ahead and eat whatever she wants indiscriminately that day with the idea that tomorrow she'll be "good" and make up for it. For me, having a small portion actually helps me to keep the rest of my meals on track because it's more like scratching a little itch. Once I've had it, I'm satisfied and can move on without thinking about how much I'm craving the dessert, pasta, or whatever. I had a few bites of cheesecake and a small portion of pasta at a dinner party the weekend before last, and when I stepped on the scale on Monday (the only day I weigh myself) I saw that I'd lost more weight that week than the one prior. The small indulgences hadn't thrown me off course like the way a whole day or two of having them would. Everyone just has to figure out what works best for them.

I started having an equal mix of cold brew coffee using Trader Joe's Low Acid French Roast or Folger's Simply Smooth and Fairlife milk about 10 days post-surgery when I was given the green light for it. I then gradually altered the ratio so it was more coffee and less milk. It actually made me feel heaps better rather than worse. I also would have the Chike coffee flavored Protein powder.

I think losing 39 pounds in that time period is fantastic progress. Focus on what you've accomplished, and take pride in it instead of diminishing it by comparing yourself to others. We're all at different ages, and have different starting BMIs, frame sizes, metabolisms, and activity levels, and we have unique goals. Some people have lost more weight in eight weeks than I have in my eight months since surgery, but this isn't like some race where everyone starts off at the same place, runs the same course, and there's a prize for being the fastest. You are the only one leading your life, and the only person you should compare yourself to is who you were in the past. I know that I'm much happier, healthier and more confident than I was this time last year. For me, losing weight at a slower pace has actually had benefits. I haven't lost much hair, and my skin has become firmer as I've toned, and isn't loose at all. My eating habits are sustainable for me long-term instead of being so restrictive I feel deprived. I feel confident this weight loss is for good instead of weight that will yoyo right back onto me. Hopefully you'll have similar benefits. I've also stalled for lonnnng stretches of time. Upping my calories actually helped me to break it. If you're not already tracking your meals and Snacks on something like MyFitnessPal, then start recording them. Try experimenting with variating your calories and your carb intake, and see if that makes a differences. If you're not very active, try adding in more activity. You don't have to join a gym. One of my best investments was a good bike that I now use to get to and from work, and to run errands. Instead of buying our groceries for the whole week, I bike up to the farmer's market or the grocery store and get a day or two's worth. It was an easy, enjoyable change that has helped. I also enjoy classes I follow along to on Daily Burn. Best wishes to you.

Congratulations on your impressive weight loss thus far. My nutritionist has bemoaned that a carb is treated as a dirty four-letter word, when in actuality it can have nutritional and even psychological benefits. It all depends on the quality of the carb, the quantity of it, and how each of us reacts to it. Having pasta or rice a couple of times a month as an accompaniment to healthy Proteins, or a slice of bread on an open faced sandwich on occasion is sound to me. It's not on par with consuming a plate of linguine alfredo as a common meal, or eating a loaf of white bread a week, but is instead balanced. She also only advocates having Protein Shakes immediately after surgery, or as a supplement if needed (I add some to coffee) rather than as a routine meal. I started having smoothies with high-protein Greek or Bulgarian yogurt (24 grams a cup), kale, and just enough berries or acai to mask the taste of the kale, about a month in, and have continued to have them regularly. There's around 22 carbs in the smoothie on average, but they're nutritious. I think there are some basic fundamentals to losing weight after WLS that everyone should try to adhere to (don't gorge on junk food, as an obvious example), but that we also need to tailor our eating habits so that they fit us personally. For me, eating in a sensible way that is sustainable is crucial. In the past I've gone on restrictive low-carb diets that have ultimately been counterproductive for me because I'd end up feeling so deprived and craving carbs with such ferocity I'd cave in and overindulge in them, then berate myself. I'd lose weight, then gain it right back and then some. I also didn't feel as energetic or as sharp on low-carb diets. It's why it's mentally liberating to me to allow myself to have pasta, rice, bread, and fruit, and even chocolate, but in reasonable amounts. I've only had pasta and rice a few times in the past eight months - mainly at dinner parties - but feeling free to have it or another carb-heavy food in a small portion on occasion actually makes me want it less. I don't feel deprived. I've had other carbs that have a lower impact but satisfy my craving for them, like Brazilian Bites cheesebread that has 4.6 carbs per little piece, low carb almond flour muffins, or pancake bites by "Eggface" a few times a week. I've lost weight slowly, but have still met all of my goals and have been in the "normal" BMI range for my height for a while now. More importantly, I feel that I can maintain my eating and exercise habits and keep the weight off. Keep doing what works best for your body and your life.

I would be crushed and frustrated, too. You had everything nicely organized and were mentally and physically revving up for the surgery. I'm sorry you've hit this roadblock. I knew from the start that insurance wouldn't cover my surgery because my BMI was under 35, but I've read so many posts here about people successfully fighting for coverage after being denied. There's another thread on here today where a woman has posted the letter she wrote to her insurance company, using some of the suggestions another poster had given to her. There are a lot of knowledgeable and kind people here. I had a really positive experience having surgery in Tijuana, and have had mostly smooth sailing post-op as well. I didn't have to jump through many hoops to arrange it either. The costs were also really reasonable. As for eating more in frustration, I think that's a pretty natural response, especially considering that you'd been on a liquid pre-op diet. Don't beat yourself up over it. Just move forward. Best wishes to you.

There are risks involved in any surgery, but there are also risks in not taking decisive action to recover from obesity before it corrodes your health and likely shortens your life. Obesity can be profoundly destructive, and the longer you are obese, the more damage it can inflict. I assessed the risk of the VSG and compared it to the long-term risk of not having the surgery, then decided to go for it. My BMI fluctuated in the low 30s. That's "mild" obesity, but the worry was that as I age it would become increasingly difficult to control my weight, and my BMI would rise to the morbid stage. My reproductive endocrinologist was the one who recommended the VSG because I have PCOS and hypothyroidism, and other patients my age and size have benefitted from it. If you're wanting to have more kids in your future, achieving a healthy weight can help. That's in addition to lessening the risk of developing type 2 diabetes, heart problems, some types of cancer, and the damage caused to your frame from excess weight over time. For me the only negative to having the surgery at a lower BMI was my insurance refused to cover any of the costs, so I had to pay for it on my own. It was a worthwhile investment! I sailed through the surgery with very little pain or discomfort. Besides dry-heaving on the first day and having unbelievably intense cramps (my period started during surgery), I felt fine. I was anticipating being in more pain and more tired than I actually was. I had a mild allergic reaction to the surgical tape used on my incisions, and got itchy little welts from it, but it healed quickly. I had a few stomach issues in the first couple of months, but nothing severe. I'm a professor on my feet for hours a day, and haven't taken a day off since the fall quarter began (three weeks after my surgery). It is important to know that it's very common for people to regret the surgery (though I didn't) in their first month post-op and have what's known as "buyer's remorse." This is when your body is healing, you're still on a restrictive diet, and you are craving normalcy. The feelings pass for the majority of people. It's also important to know that since you are starting at a lower BMI, you'll likely lose weight at a slower pace. Don't feel discouraged, and don't compare yourself to others who've had surgery and are losing much more rapidly. In the eight months since my surgery I've gone from being in the "mildly obese" BMI to comfortably within the "normal" weight range for my height. My weight loss has been much slower than those who started off with higher BMIs, and I've had several stalls along the way, but it has come off. I've gone from a size 14 to a 6/8, and am still losing. I feel lighter, happier, and more confident. Hopefully the same will be true for you.

I'm in Santa Monica and have Blue Shield of California, but knew from the start they wouldn't cover any of the costs because my BMI was below 35. I just zipped down to Tijuana and had surgery at a facility there that was actually nicer than the ones in LA where I've received other medical treatment. If I'd qualified I would have been required to submit documentation of continued obesity despite participation in a weight loss program, in addition to undergoing a psychological evaluation and nutritional evaluation. Since you're in San Diego you might want to explore having the surgery in Tijuana. I had a really positive experience with Dr. Fernando Garcia.

I would have just replied that it's all about moderation. If you were eating a massive burger with a huge side of fries while talking about dieting and wanting to lose more weight in between your bites, then I could understand someone making a comment about your choices. Having a little slider when you've already lost 90 pounds and are clearly doing something right is not worthy of comment at all. Only my husband, parents, and doctors know I've had the VSG, and they rarely ever question what I eat. When they do it's more out of consideration than questioning my choices. The only comments I've received regarding eating have been from friends and coworkers who are surprised I haven't had more, or wondering if I don't like what I've ordered. I usually will have leftovers boxed, and just make a comment about being too full to finish at the time but looking forward to having the rest later. Since about the three month mark I haven't forbidden myself from eating anything in particular; I've just been much more mindful and reasonable than in the past.

Ask your friend how many times she's climbed 10 floors of stairs when she's in a tall building with elevators in solid working condition. How often she uses a microwave to quickly warm up food. How frequently she rides in a car, even for shorter distances, instead of walking or biking. When she's wanting to communicate with someone, does she send a text or email, or write out a letter and put it in the mail? I'm willing to bet she uses tools all the time that were designed for efficiency. It's logical. She doesn't construe any of that as being the "easy way out" even though it was all designed to make life easier, and to utilize time more wisely. The VSG isn't a quick-fix, easy way out. It's an efficient tool that has proven benefits in helping obese people to lose weight, and equally importantly to maintain weight loss. It's not pursued for vanity, but for profound medical and emotional benefits. It has been proven to help reduce the risks of serious weight-related diseases and health struggles that can substantially impact one's quality of life, and even shorten it by years. It has helped to decrease the risk of clinical depression, which can be as detrimental to your life as some medical diseases. Not only does having WLS help you, but it can actually help any children you might have in your future. I recently read a study about how women of reproductive age who lose weight following bariatric surgery can reduce the risk of obesity in her children through epigenetic mechanisms. If you already have children, then the more vitality you have the more active you can be with them. Taking care your own health is a part of benefitting their lives. Statistically, few people who are obese lose weight and maintain that weight loss long-term. It's why an increasing number of doctors are recommending bariatric surgery because of the proven efficacy. It's not uncommon for some people to gain a bit of the weight back over time, but most still maintain a substantial weight loss. Nothing about WLS is easy. It requires significant dedication and self-discipline. It will require you to retrain your eating habits and how you think about food. It will cost you time and money. For me it's definitely been a worthwhile investment. I definitely don't look like a "big wrinkly mess" post-surgery. I'm eight months out and my skin is even firmer than it was prior to the surgery. I had a lower BMI and have lost weight at a slower pace, and I believe that's helped my skin. Still, I'm a couple of years older than you, and I'm getting carded again. I can wear shorts with confidence. I am a professor and have been mistaken for a student many times since losing weight. I felt older last year. Your friend's negativity could be a projection of her own insecurities and subconscious fears that if you have the surgery and shed weight, she'll lose something she has in common with you now. I'm not saying she's misery seeking company, but I do think her objections to you having surgery could be more about her than about you. At any rate, it's your body, your wellbeing, your life, your decision. Arm yourself with knowledge and then make a choice that is right for you. Best wishes.

I usually just have coffee (surgeon approved) with Fairlife milk for Breakfast, and then will have a small meal midmorning. My favorites are: - One scrambled egg on Wasa or IKEA's brand of crispbread. Sometimes I'll spread half of a Laughing Cow on the crisp bread and scramble the other half with the egg. - smoothie made with plain Greek or Bulgarian yogurt that is high in Protein and low in carbs (Fage, Trader Joe's brand, or White Mountain are the brands I use the most) with either a cup of fresh peaches (12 carbs) or a serving of frozen fruit, and some chia seeds. - Chia pudding. I make it with one cup of Fairlife milk, 1/4 cup of chia seeds, and two tablespoons of sugar free Torani syrup, and then let it set overnight. - pancake bites made with high protein pancake mix. The recipe is on The World According to Eggface blog. This is usually a Sunday morning treat.