Sajijoma

I know it probably isn't going to help to say it, because it only made me angry when people said it to me, but I am truly sorry for your loss. I have lost 3 children. 2 before birth and 1 at birth and there is no right or wrong way to deal or not deal with that loss. It's a deep pain that never completely goes away. If you are lucky, you manage to eventually get it into a box enough to go on with your life, but it's never gone. You will have days where you cry and scream and wish you could have died with them and you'll have days where life feels almost normal and then later that night you feel guilty for almost feeling normal again. It's a long process and for some it takes years to get to the place where they can handle living again. Grief counseling can help, but I didn't feel helped by it. I felt like they wanted to rush me through my grief to where they wanted me to be and feel and I just wasn't. Talking about it helps. Maybe talking to your grand daughter about her dad and the fun things he did as a kid or the funny things he'd say or just whatever. It can give you both something to heal with. My babies were so small when they died that I didn't have that memory to fall back on to get through to where I am. Am I "over it"? No, you never get over losing your child, and I still have days where I cry and miss them but I'm functional and I have come to the conclusion there is a reason I'm still here and I need to focus on that purpose until the day we are reunited again. You can't find the comfort for your pain in a bottle of booze, a bottle of pills, or like I did, a box of ice cream sandwiches daily. All it does is make you sicker and will eventually lead to your family mourning you sooner. Hang in there [emoji173]️

My approach has been to take a neutral stance. I have told very few people outright, but if someone asks "how I did it" and they are someone who like me has had issues, then I tell them. I'm not ashamed of having the surgery, but at the same time it's not everyone's business either. I don't evangelize the awesomeness of my rny to the grocery checkout clerk when she commented how good I looked and she could tell I lost a lot of weight, but between friends and stuff, there really isn't a reason to keep it a secret or lie. I have lost one friend after she found out I had wls and that's ok because doing a post mortem on that friendship, I realized she wasn't really my friend to begin with and only wanted someone to beat down and I made a great target. If your friends turn on you let them go. Life is better without the toxic life suckers and if you do tell, it might help someone. My former college roommate was the one who got me thinking about it. We had always been the same size and then the next time I saw her she looked amazing and when I found out she did wls I thought "heck, if she did it, why can't I?!?".

My biggest mistake is not realizing how monumental losing weight would change my life. My life before was very basic and routine because it had to be. I couldn't function really and now, there are lots of fights and arguments because I'm not ok just sitting on the sofa starring at my husband play video games for hours and the kids run around from place to place while my life burns away. Even the best relationships will have periods where you have to renegotiate your life together. I mean, we aren't getting a divorce or anything, but I was not expecting to have to fight for the right to be allowed to go to the mall or go for a walk because it's not what he likes to do and he's still stuck in our old life cycle and I'm trying to make a new one.

My biggest mistake is not realizing how monumental losing weight would change my life. My life before was very basic and routine because it had to be. I couldn't function really and now, there are lots of fights and arguments because I'm not ok just sitting on the sofa starring at my husband play video games for hours and the kids run around from place to place while my life burns away. Even the best relationships will have periods where you have to renegotiate your life together. I mean, we aren't getting a divorce or anything, but I was not expecting to have to fight for the right to be allowed to go to the mall or go for a walk because it's not what he likes to do and he's still stuck in our old life cycle and I'm trying to make a new one.

I know it probably isn't going to help to say it, because it only made me angry when people said it to me, but I am truly sorry for your loss. I have lost 3 children. 2 before birth and 1 at birth and there is no right or wrong way to deal or not deal with that loss. It's a deep pain that never completely goes away. If you are lucky, you manage to eventually get it into a box enough to go on with your life, but it's never gone. You will have days where you cry and scream and wish you could have died with them and you'll have days where life feels almost normal and then later that night you feel guilty for almost feeling normal again. It's a long process and for some it takes years to get to the place where they can handle living again. Grief counseling can help, but I didn't feel helped by it. I felt like they wanted to rush me through my grief to where they wanted me to be and feel and I just wasn't. Talking about it helps. Maybe talking to your grand daughter about her dad and the fun things he did as a kid or the funny things he'd say or just whatever. It can give you both something to heal with. My babies were so small when they died that I didn't have that memory to fall back on to get through to where I am. Am I "over it"? No, you never get over losing your child, and I still have days where I cry and miss them but I'm functional and I have come to the conclusion there is a reason I'm still here and I need to focus on that purpose until the day we are reunited again. You can't find the comfort for your pain in a bottle of booze, a bottle of pills, or like I did, a box of ice cream sandwiches daily. All it does is make you sicker and will eventually lead to your family mourning you sooner. Hang in there [emoji173]️

My approach has been to take a neutral stance. I have told very few people outright, but if someone asks "how I did it" and they are someone who like me has had issues, then I tell them. I'm not ashamed of having the surgery, but at the same time it's not everyone's business either. I don't evangelize the awesomeness of my rny to the grocery checkout clerk when she commented how good I looked and she could tell I lost a lot of weight, but between friends and stuff, there really isn't a reason to keep it a secret or lie. I have lost one friend after she found out I had wls and that's ok because doing a post mortem on that friendship, I realized she wasn't really my friend to begin with and only wanted someone to beat down and I made a great target. If your friends turn on you let them go. Life is better without the toxic life suckers and if you do tell, it might help someone. My former college roommate was the one who got me thinking about it. We had always been the same size and then the next time I saw her she looked amazing and when I found out she did wls I thought "heck, if she did it, why can't I?!?".

I know it probably isn't going to help to say it, because it only made me angry when people said it to me, but I am truly sorry for your loss. I have lost 3 children. 2 before birth and 1 at birth and there is no right or wrong way to deal or not deal with that loss. It's a deep pain that never completely goes away. If you are lucky, you manage to eventually get it into a box enough to go on with your life, but it's never gone. You will have days where you cry and scream and wish you could have died with them and you'll have days where life feels almost normal and then later that night you feel guilty for almost feeling normal again. It's a long process and for some it takes years to get to the place where they can handle living again. Grief counseling can help, but I didn't feel helped by it. I felt like they wanted to rush me through my grief to where they wanted me to be and feel and I just wasn't. Talking about it helps. Maybe talking to your grand daughter about her dad and the fun things he did as a kid or the funny things he'd say or just whatever. It can give you both something to heal with. My babies were so small when they died that I didn't have that memory to fall back on to get through to where I am. Am I "over it"? No, you never get over losing your child, and I still have days where I cry and miss them but I'm functional and I have come to the conclusion there is a reason I'm still here and I need to focus on that purpose until the day we are reunited again. You can't find the comfort for your pain in a bottle of booze, a bottle of pills, or like I did, a box of ice cream sandwiches daily. All it does is make you sicker and will eventually lead to your family mourning you sooner. Hang in there [emoji173]️

I know it probably isn't going to help to say it, because it only made me angry when people said it to me, but I am truly sorry for your loss. I have lost 3 children. 2 before birth and 1 at birth and there is no right or wrong way to deal or not deal with that loss. It's a deep pain that never completely goes away. If you are lucky, you manage to eventually get it into a box enough to go on with your life, but it's never gone. You will have days where you cry and scream and wish you could have died with them and you'll have days where life feels almost normal and then later that night you feel guilty for almost feeling normal again. It's a long process and for some it takes years to get to the place where they can handle living again. Grief counseling can help, but I didn't feel helped by it. I felt like they wanted to rush me through my grief to where they wanted me to be and feel and I just wasn't. Talking about it helps. Maybe talking to your grand daughter about her dad and the fun things he did as a kid or the funny things he'd say or just whatever. It can give you both something to heal with. My babies were so small when they died that I didn't have that memory to fall back on to get through to where I am. Am I "over it"? No, you never get over losing your child, and I still have days where I cry and miss them but I'm functional and I have come to the conclusion there is a reason I'm still here and I need to focus on that purpose until the day we are reunited again. You can't find the comfort for your pain in a bottle of booze, a bottle of pills, or like I did, a box of ice cream sandwiches daily. All it does is make you sicker and will eventually lead to your family mourning you sooner. Hang in there [emoji173]️

The fat acceptance movement is a lot like the feminism movement in that a lot of people have utter misconceptions about what the movement is actually about and why it exists. Much like the crazy people who call themselves feminists while attacking men, saying we should just kill off all the men, saying the men are inferior, etc are not ACTUALLY feminists, people who truly believe that being fat is healthy and that all doctors are just being hateful and discriminatory are not actually fat activists.
The point of the fat acceptance movement is the same point as the broader body positivity movement: it doesn't matter if you weigh 800 pounds and literally can't move off your bed, it doesn't matter if you have made yourself unhealthy with poor choices or if you are making no move whatsoever to lose weight. Every person deserves to be treated like a human being, with dignity and respect, end of story. Fat acceptance is all about treating fat people like they are humans instead of the often appalling way we are often treated, ways that are still socially acceptable and that need to change, NOW. The point is, no one has a right to judge you or treat you poorly because of your body because it's your body, not theirs, and no one gets a say unless you want them to. These misguided people who stubbornly tell themselves that fat acceptance is about pretending to be healthy and thinking fat is better are just that, misguided. I can't really blame them, in some ways. Being treated like less of a person because of how you look is just absolutely wrong and ridiculous, and doesn't serve to actually help people.
No true body positivist would ever ignore medical advise just because they are hurt and offended by the truth, just like no actual feminist would say that men are inferior. There are idiot radicals in every movement, but what's important to take away from it is the core message.

Trying on clothes is my favorite thing to do. There have been several times now where I go into a dressing room armed with a couple items. Then low and behold someone has left items in the dressing room that they didn't want.
I find myself trying them all on just because I can! It's like a new challenge for me. The last few times I went shopping my hubby came with me. I disappeared into the dressing room for 30 minutes. I come out and he's laughing because he knows exactly what I am up to. Trying on clothes.
Sometime in the next few weeks I have to go shopping for summer clothing. I really own 1 pair of jeans, a few pair of yoga pants and 4 tops that are starting to get pretty raggedy.
I hit my goal a few weeks ago but am hoping to stabilize before investing in another whole new wardrobe. I have done that 4 times since this all began. I am hoping I am ready for my end game wardrobe.

My approach has been to take a neutral stance. I have told very few people outright, but if someone asks "how I did it" and they are someone who like me has had issues, then I tell them. I'm not ashamed of having the surgery, but at the same time it's not everyone's business either. I don't evangelize the awesomeness of my rny to the grocery checkout clerk when she commented how good I looked and she could tell I lost a lot of weight, but between friends and stuff, there really isn't a reason to keep it a secret or lie. I have lost one friend after she found out I had wls and that's ok because doing a post mortem on that friendship, I realized she wasn't really my friend to begin with and only wanted someone to beat down and I made a great target. If your friends turn on you let them go. Life is better without the toxic life suckers and if you do tell, it might help someone. My former college roommate was the one who got me thinking about it. We had always been the same size and then the next time I saw her she looked amazing and when I found out she did wls I thought "heck, if she did it, why can't I?!?".

I feel kind of bummed! I don't have any cute sneezes or hiccups or burps or anything like that to tell me I'm done eating. All I get is this feeling that is a little tight between my breasts. Sometimes my tongue feels like it's drawing back and that's it. I also get the cold all the time which is AWESOME because I used to be so hot and sweaty all the time and now I can wear all my cute sweaters and mittens and scarves and it's mostly fine. LOL

When I am in Colorado (altitudes over 6,000') I wretch if I eat anything starchy. It's odd. I don't have this problem when I'm closer to sea level. It's happened twice, so I'm now very conscious of it. I don't know if its my diaphragm working harder to get air in but it is very real. Feel free to validate my experience flat landers
And, NO I wasn't smoking anything

I had my yearly checkup last week and everything looked good in the office, but I didn't get my labs back til today and I am please to announce I do not have diabetes, high chloresterol, high triglycerides or any of that bad stuff! I could dance for joy! My only "problems" if you can call them that, is that my Iron is a little low and my B12 is a lot high. LOL so I have a message in to my NUT and waiting to see what she wants to do with that. But I am soooo excited to not have diabetes because my parents, my living siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, and my grandparents when they were all alive had diabetes and I had gestational diabetes in my last pregnancy, so to walk out today with perfect health and perfect numbers was AMAZING! I am the first one in my family to almost reach 40(still got 9 more months) without having diabetes!!! It was the NSV of all NSV's! This surgery really has made my life better!

My advice would be to try not to weigh yourself everyday and put the majority of your focus on just the Water, Protein, exercise and Vitamins because it can be depressing if you are expecting more on the scale. I'm not a fast loser by any means. I'll lose a lb a day for like a week then stall out for the next 3 and then lost a lb a day for the next 4 days then stall out again for a few more weeks. It just is what it is. Physically though, I'm gaining strength and endurance and my body shape is changing and my pant size shrinking. It's just not so cut and dry as many of us have been taught that it just melts off and everyday you lose weight and every few days you lose more inches. It's more like a stair case and some of us get steep stairs of loss and some of us have shallow stair steps, but we all get to the same place in the end if we keep on doing the basics and stay away from those things that really sabotage long term success.

I'm wearing new pants today and noticed they felt somehow different. I figured out it's because they're actually touching my butt instead of hanging off! Isn't it funny how used we can get to wearing clothes that are a little too big after surgery?
In other news, I am about 1.5 pounds away from onederland. So close I can almost taste it!

My biggest mistake is not realizing how monumental losing weight would change my life. My life before was very basic and routine because it had to be. I couldn't function really and now, there are lots of fights and arguments because I'm not ok just sitting on the sofa starring at my husband play video games for hours and the kids run around from place to place while my life burns away. Even the best relationships will have periods where you have to renegotiate your life together. I mean, we aren't getting a divorce or anything, but I was not expecting to have to fight for the right to be allowed to go to the mall or go for a walk because it's not what he likes to do and he's still stuck in our old life cycle and I'm trying to make a new one.

My biggest mistake is not realizing how monumental losing weight would change my life. My life before was very basic and routine because it had to be. I couldn't function really and now, there are lots of fights and arguments because I'm not ok just sitting on the sofa starring at my husband play video games for hours and the kids run around from place to place while my life burns away. Even the best relationships will have periods where you have to renegotiate your life together. I mean, we aren't getting a divorce or anything, but I was not expecting to have to fight for the right to be allowed to go to the mall or go for a walk because it's not what he likes to do and he's still stuck in our old life cycle and I'm trying to make a new one.

With love, you can't really control when or if you fall in love. I had relationships where I wanted so badly to be "in love" with the guy, but it just didn't happen and then like with my husband, I fell in love with him at first sight and I'm sure he did as well, because we got engaged on our second official date. We had written emails and talked on the phone for about 2 months, but our 2nd date we were engaged and he was shelling out big cash for the ring. lOL we got married a month later and have been together for over 17yrs and counting and with 7 kids to our credit. It's funny because even though I loved him and knew I never wanted to be without him, it wasn't until he got sick with the flu about 3wks after we were married that I truly knew just how much I loved him. ???? when you know, you just know.

I was that way with tea. I used to drink nearly a gallon combined of tea every day and after surgery it tastes like spinach Water. It was disgusting! It's gotten slowly better as the months tick by, but it never will taste as good as it did pre op I think. I'm actually ok with that. I've mourned that and moved on. I still get a glass every once in awhile(Splenda sweetened same as pre op) and it's ok....nothing special, but a good change when I get water bored.

My biggest mistake is not realizing how monumental losing weight would change my life. My life before was very basic and routine because it had to be. I couldn't function really and now, there are lots of fights and arguments because I'm not ok just sitting on the sofa starring at my husband play video games for hours and the kids run around from place to place while my life burns away. Even the best relationships will have periods where you have to renegotiate your life together. I mean, we aren't getting a divorce or anything, but I was not expecting to have to fight for the right to be allowed to go to the mall or go for a walk because it's not what he likes to do and he's still stuck in our old life cycle and I'm trying to make a new one.

Thanks everyone! It really is an overwhelmingly good feeling to know that this surgery and this change in my life has already saved me from things that to this point I assumed were inevitable, like getting diabetes.

My biggest mistake is not realizing how monumental losing weight would change my life. My life before was very basic and routine because it had to be. I couldn't function really and now, there are lots of fights and arguments because I'm not ok just sitting on the sofa starring at my husband play video games for hours and the kids run around from place to place while my life burns away. Even the best relationships will have periods where you have to renegotiate your life together. I mean, we aren't getting a divorce or anything, but I was not expecting to have to fight for the right to be allowed to go to the mall or go for a walk because it's not what he likes to do and he's still stuck in our old life cycle and I'm trying to make a new one.

My biggest mistake is not realizing how monumental losing weight would change my life. My life before was very basic and routine because it had to be. I couldn't function really and now, there are lots of fights and arguments because I'm not ok just sitting on the sofa starring at my husband play video games for hours and the kids run around from place to place while my life burns away. Even the best relationships will have periods where you have to renegotiate your life together. I mean, we aren't getting a divorce or anything, but I was not expecting to have to fight for the right to be allowed to go to the mall or go for a walk because it's not what he likes to do and he's still stuck in our old life cycle and I'm trying to make a new one.

Congrats!! What an amazing milestone