FocusOnMeNow

Ok so this surgery is on your stomach. But it is what is in our heads and heart that got us to where we really needed this surgery to begin with. Don't want to gain it back "keep coming back" to bariatric pal, check out OVereaters Anonymous, see a therapist, read self help books starting with "emotional first aid". Start that process now pre-op. Most importantly do not reach your goal weight and EVER EVER EVER think "ok I'm done". It's like I told my friend... Six months post op I told her that I was going to OA and she said "but you're not an Overeater now" ...my reply "I'm not an active Overeater right now but I will always be an Overeater." It's just like with drinking... If you think that you don't have a problem... Well that's a problem. If you acknowledge that you have a problem and keep addressing it every single day then you will stay successful. OA is not the only way. There are other support groups out there. If there is a good mix of healthy people who are going to the one you went to (in addition to the few who gained), then keep going back. The great thing about these groups is that you learn to accept these people foibles and all... And then this magic thing happens and you learn to accept and love and respect yourself and once that happens you will NEVER GO BACK!!! [emoji4]

Bacon bacon and more bacon. Premier protein vanilla shake is the creamer in my coffee. Sometimes eggs. But I swear if I am having a stall, if I increase my bacon intake the lbs start melting off again[emoji6]

I get myself massages to reward myself. I have donated a LOT but I also tossed out a lot of my 3x and in fact kind of wished I had burned them. Nice suits and stuff I donated and I did keep a couple of pairs of "before" pants purely for illustrative purposes when I reach my goal[emoji41]

I lost weight every single day for several weeks post op. Many people actually gain "weight" after their hospital stay. But it is literally "water weight". They pump you full of fluids before you go home to try to prevent dehydration because many of us have SO much trouble getting all our fluids in the first few days. In 99% of the time I say follow Drs advice it is for a reason. That is probably the reason. You definitely want to weigh at least once a week. By the time you are a week out much of that extra fluid should have come off. I weighed every morning for weeks or possibly months on end, and it was a really fun ride. I'm 9 months out and only losing 1-2 lbs per week now, but very happy with the resultS[emoji4]

I have lost 91 lbs and you will NOT believe this BUT the only size that has not changed is my bra size! They are definitely a bit less robust but for the life of me I cannot wear either a smaller band (and still breathe) or a smaller cup without "spillage". What I have had to do though is buy newer bras in the same size because the elastic had kind of stretched out in the old bras. BUT from you tube videos (check out Clusie and Kstar) most people do eventually go down in size and it may just be matter of time for me[emoji4]

First you are not alone. You are never alone. There are thousands of us going through this journey with you. Second, you made a decision to take care of yourself and got the surgery and for most of us it was the best decision that we ever made. Here is a tip: it's not about the food! It's about what's in your head and in your heart. And right now it sounds like your heart is hurting a little. The whole in your heart that you used to stuff with food, you can no longer cover over with more food. So you are somewhat exposed. You have to find new things to enjoy in your life besides food. You have to find a new way to relate to your friends and family and that is what you are having trouble with. No need to impose your new diet on them, although healthier cooking can't hurt anyone, except for it may take away their coping mechanism just like it seems to be taking away yours. This can leave everyone a little bit uncomfortable because without stuffing those awkward feelings down with food... You are HOLY $H!T actually feeling your feelings now OMG. It might be time to get some endogenous opioids (endorphins from exercise or hugs) instead of exogenous ones (food, alcohol, and other drugs that we all self medicate with). Yoga helps us make that mind body connection and get in touch with our bodies as well. You made the right decision. Now make some more. Do not try to force your new way of life on other people. Let them eat what they feel like BUT you don't have to be around it yourself. Instead ask them if they would like to join you outside for a walk? A bike ride? A trip to the zoo? Or anywhere you can get some exercise and some sunshine as humans were originally intended to get large doses of both every day. Have difficulty with your emotions? Try journaling. Try self help books. Try just about anything on Amazon by Brene Brown. Google Brene Brown Ted talk. Someone else on bariatric pal recommended her to me and it has changed my life. You got this. And you are never alone.

As a formerly divorced person myself I must CONGRATULATE you!!! Sounds like you have lost a lot more than 5 lbs of dead weight. So let me get this straight...you did something to take care of yourself (surgery) and he went out and hooked up with someone else? I am sorry that you have to put up with this kind of treatment from such a cad, but all I can say is that you are better off without him. I suggest that you immediately (within the next 24 hours while he might still be feeling guilty) ask him to sign a separation agreement that includes the maximum amount of child support permitted by law in your state during your separation period. You should also include in this agreement that he will either continue to pay for your and your kids health insurance during the separation period (the kids' should be indefinitely) -OR- if he was not subsidizing their health insurance previously then he should start paying AT LEAST half. Things with the new girlfriend might not be so rosy if he has to meet his responsibilities (his kids). If he refuses to sign you can likely file a petition with the help of a lawyer, and if you cannot afford a lawyer go to legal aid at your nearest law school and/or your state or local (county) government and they will help you. Now go today and clean out any bank accounts that you share and take out the maximum cash advance on any cards in his name, and put the funds in accounts that are solely in yours or in yours and your kids names. This is BEYOND horrendous of course. I recently have been through a VERY painful situation myself. In fact, my ex moved in with my best friend two doors down from me. Whoops, I guess that she wasn't my best friend afterall;-) Now that I have had weight loss surgery I found it VERY hard to cope (because I could not stuff my feelings down with food as I had been for the last 20 years). My recommended readings (kindle and audible combo is my favorite coz I can even listen in the car on the way to work or you can listen with headphones while the kids are watching tv): Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You The Journey from Abandonment to Healing: Revised and Updated: Surviving Through and Recovering from the Five Stages That Accompany the Loss of Love It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy Women Who Love Too Much These books, my therapist, going to OA meetings and bariatric pal really have helped and inspired me so much during what I honestly thought was an unbearable situation. Definitely take the time you need to feel your feelings, cry your eyes out, punch a pillow etc. But do not forget to do what you need to do to take care of yourself and your kids as well. We will all be here to support you still when you need to take a break from kicking butt. Take care of YOU girl! We've all got your back:-)

Biotin up to 10mg (milligrams)=10,000mcg(micrograms) per day and Iron - best choice is Vitron C taken at least 2 hours AFTER you have any calcium (or even better take your iron with a dose of beef, chicken or nuts that all have iron). Apparently what I have heard from Drs is that it is all three Biotin, Iron and Protein (of course you should also get your other Vitamins as well, but defeciencies in these are what contribute to much of the hair loss. I made the BIG mistake of taking 1,000mcg per day of biotin for a long time (that is only 1 mg) and its not enough. It takes about 3 months for your hair to catch up once you start taking the right amount. I am now taking 5mg=5,000mcg every day. The 10mg=10,000mcg is the absolute MOST per day that anyone should ever take. Biotin up to 10mg (milligrams)=10,000mcg(micrograms) per day and IRON - best choice is Vitron C taken at least 2 hours AFTER you have any calcium (or even better take your iron with a dose of beef, chicken or nuts that all have iron). Apparently what I have heard from Drs is that it is all three Biotin, Iron and protein (of course you should also get your other vitamins as well, but defeciencies in these are what contribute to much of the hair loss. I made the BIG mistake of taking 1,000mcg per day of biotin for a long time (that is only 1 mg) and its not enough. It takes about 3 months for your hair to catch up once you start taking the right amount. I am now taking 5mg=5,000mcg every day. The 10mg=10,000mcg is the absolute MOST per day that anyone should ever take.

Biotin up to 10mg (milligrams)=10,000mcg(micrograms) per day and Iron - best choice is Vitron C taken at least 2 hours AFTER you have any Calcium (or even better take your iron with a dose of beef, chicken or nuts that all have iron). Apparently what I have heard from Drs is that it is all three Biotin, Iron and Protein (of course you should also get your other Vitamins as well, but defeciencies in these are what contribute to much of the hair loss. I made the BIG mistake of taking 1,000mcg per day of biotin for a long time (that is only 1 mg) and its not enough. It takes about 3 months for your hair to catch up once you start taking the right amount. I am now taking 5mg=5,000mcg every day. The 10mg=10,000mcg is the absolute MOST per day that anyone should ever take.

Looks like it would also be good with fresh mozzarella ciligene if feta isn't your thing:-)

Good for you. I have never tried 4" heels in my life. When I was coming up you could only find heels that high via the Fredericks of Hollywood catalog lol. But I am able to get back into my 2 inchers which is a MAJOR improvement for me.

I recommend a full coverage Vanity Fair back smoother bra. I realize it's not the back that needs smoothing but it does an amazing job with the sides as well and has thick contour cups. It's called Beauty Back Smoother and it's awesome

Great job!

@@Sajijoma ... Sounds like time to be fitted for a new size?

I was def told not to drink anything red for awhile pre and post op.

I got a "soft cup" bra. It took me several weeks before I could go back to underwire or anything tight.

Are you pre-op or post? Are you transitioning to or from purely liquid diet?

I eat my guac, which is tremendously healthy with lots of potassium and good fat with a limited amount of "Beanitos" they are a bean based healthier version of Doritos. You can also use veggies for dipping in guac if you are on solid food.

I had no idea this was "guys room" I'm on the app and assumed it was something I had "subscribed" to. Whoops!

Vitamin water zero rise orange flavor. I am addicted to it. Take medicine cups and take 1 shot every 4 minutes during your waking hours. If you cannot get enough fluids now that you are back at work, then take more time off until you can. Dehydration is dangerous and you can't possibly do a good job at anything physical mentally or otherwise if you're dehydrated. Take care of you!

Your life will change in so many ways big and small that you cannot imagine and all for the better. I'm 9 months out and wouldn't change a thing[emoji4]

Ok for real...once I woke up from surgery I did not have ANYTHING but Tylenol for the pain. The pain from VSG does not compare to knee replacement or the rehab that goes with that. I will let the folks who have had plastics chime in but my understanding is that the pain from a tummy tuck is worse than the pain from VSG. After the first week or so I no longer needed the Tylenol. I still have a 10 day supply of liquid oxycodone in my house untouched. The reason I refused all pain meds besides Tylenol was the nausea and vomitting they cause. I did not want to barf with my brand new baby tummy, and I somehow managed not to for several weeks. You will not need and will not get an iv push of Dilaudid for a VSG. Good luck[emoji4]

I have been looking into dermal rolling which actually said that particular area of the neck is not only extra skin but there's an actual muscle that holds our chin in there and once it goes slack it doesn't go back. It may be that surgery is necessary to correct but certainly other less invasive procedures like fractional "repair", dermal rolling etc cannot hurt. There used to be something called the "lifestyle lift"... That company went out of business but there may be something simpler than a full on facelift. Nonetheless you need a dermatologist and/or facial plastic surgeon's opinion not mine[emoji6]

Yes it's just to certify that you are healthy enough to have surgery. It's for your actual safety rather than the insurance approval which is only for payment. Your safety is priceless[emoji6]

I cannot even think of a single reason not to do it. I waited until 45 and although I've lost 90 lbs and I am MUCH more mobile I still have some knee issues. Do NOT wait till your knees, heart, lungs pancreas liver etc gives out. And your skin is much more likely to snap back now than in another decade. Just remember that they do the surgery on your stomach not on your head or your heart so I strongly recommend making a firm Commitment to yourself to work on those things through therapy and/or support groups or ideally BOTH starting now. Otherwise you could one day wind up gaining the weight back. Now do what you need to do for you ... Fast as you can[emoji4] only regret most of us have is that we didn't do it sooner[emoji41]