Steph0625

Thanks @@jenn1 I'm seeing some progress in my muscle definition finally! I definitely use that eye candy as motivation ???? I'm just working on the flirting part haha

Thank you! And I'm working on it lol

Also, in that last picture, I was told I look angry lol I guess that's just my "resting gym face" Really I was just trying not to be obvious about taking a picture lol

I wanted to do some progress pic updates if anyone is interested! Also, I've definitely gained a lot of confidence about working out at the gym since I last posted! I've actually been hit on there too lol unless I'm reading too much into guys "helping" me take the 45 lbs plates off the bench press ???? But there is something wrong with me! I had a very attractive guy offer to spot me if I needed it and my reply?! Okay, thanks... ???? and I went on to say I just needed lighter weights. Smh In my defense, I was struggling with my military presses because all of the lighter weights were being used, so I looked (and felt) ridiculous trying to do so much weight lol But it made me realize I have no game. And now I'm wondering if I'll ever work up the confidence to talk to him again (he usually works out with another guy so it's a little more intimidating to approach him)

Thanks everyone for the advice! Of course you have to be careful when meeting people you've spoken to online. I was skeptical because of that. For those that say to just do things I enjoy, I do try to meet people that way. But when the only thing you do is go to the gym after work, and occasionally go out to the bars (country dancehall) it's kinda hard to find people to connect with. I just don't have a lot of people that have time to go do things with me, or our schedules don't match up very well. I'm also very shy when it comes to flirting and getting to know a guy that I might be interested in. Idk if thats from lack of practice, being overweight/unnoticed my whole life, or just a quirk of mine. So I have a hard time meeting guys when I am doing the things I enjoy. I'm pretty sure I have resting b*tch face when I'm at the gym lol

Thanks! I'm not ashamed or hiding any aspect of my journey. I believe in honesty and would rather they know and still go forward with it than have to explain why I eat so little later (or why I need to eat so often). But I don't tell every single guy that messages me either. Just the ones I think might become something more. I just feel like it's really rare nowadays to be 22 and never have dated before. It makes the idea of a first date even more nerve wracking.

So I'm 22 and have never been on a date before. I decided to try POF (online dating) and have guys messaging me now. I've been interested in a few and they always ask why I'm single. I like to be honest so I tell the ones I'm really interested in that I was shy and overweight most of my life (or something like that) and that I recently had VSG. Some take it well, others don't ( I don't really care lol) My problem is that this is completely uncharted territory for me, and I'm just not sure how to act. I don't really want it to be obvious that I've never dated when we go out. Because I have no idea how to be with someone as more than friends. It's bad enough to deal with that, but I'm also hesitant because I have quite a bit of loose skin. Most guys in their 20s aren't used to this being an issue. It has become my biggest insecurity now. But I don't want that to hold me back either... Any advice for me? Anyone else experience this?

Haha good to know about the yoga pants! The mystery is solved!

Well I've always had a large butt and it used to be not very attractive (to me at least) lol and it seems so disproportionate to the rest of me now. I'm not a guy so I don't know what they find attractive or not. I'd rather have a big butt than none at all so I guess I consider it a positive thing!

@@KindaFamiliar I haven't actually been hit on, unless you count the weird guy acting creepy lol You may be getting looks and just not notice it

@@jenn1 Your post wins the award for most awesome reply! That was fantastic and I especially loved the "wrestle a grizzly bear" part! I laughed way too hard while reading this.

So maybe that's why I haven't had anyone approach me and talk with me, I always have my headphones in. I can't stand to workout without music. As far as the creepers at the gym, I have dealt with one before. It makes it worse that I workout at night after I get off work, but I went and bought pepper spray. He was just being weird by walking too close behind me when I was using the cable weights, and then just staring at me while I was doing my seated rows. I was like why can't you just stare using the mirror like everyone else?!?! Or from farther away? lol

@M!@ Haha yeah it can ruin a good set for sure! Its especially bad when I'm trying something I've never attempted before or something that is awkward feeling to me (like reverse or side lunges). But since I'm guilty of people watching too I guess I can't complain lol

@@BarrySue I understand that, except for the guys approaching me part lol Obviously that comes along with the whole eye contact thing I'm not used to the flirting either. I never know what to say in reply