BarrySue

But I LOVE everything!!!

But I LOVE everything!!!

In that case, invest in all those lovely storage/compact clothing doo-dads and contraptions I see on QVC

You acquire basic/essentials that you keep all year round as a base/foundation for fashion throughout the year. Then you rotate in and discard seasonal items one by one.

Some people go to Plato's Closet or consignment shop route too to swap out or unload old clothing to make room for new stuff, especially if they have a taste for fashionable clothes.

I was a 50DD, now I'm a 40C. It's a very, very full C, but once you take the bra off, it's the ol' fried eggs on a nail bit. They still look huge because the rest of me has gotten so much smaller, though. It comes with the territory; loose skin and saggy breasts are a luxury tax we pay for being allowed to eat uncontrollably our entire lives. I'll just pop on down to Mexico next year and purchase myself a set of new ones. God bless the technological advances in medicine!

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I've learned to LOVE the riceless rolls! A lot of places will turn things riceless if you ask.

Oh wow!! I am going to try this with my favorite rolls. Thanks for the tip!

*erects neon blinking "EMBRACE THE STALL" sign*

A very creative sex life

Nice Very nice

I stick to Target and Old Navy for cheap but comfortable/marginally fashionable stuff (Kohl's and Ross as well). Target definitely has nicer stuff with a more interesting selection than many of the department stores I've visited, and there are still larger/plus sizes if I want something a little bigger or if a certain style is too small for my still-massive chest. Unfortunately, Torrid's clothing is too big on me due to their vanity sizing. I don't fit into their size 14/16, and yet at other stores I can be 18/20.

Haha, I feel you, OP. I've always had male friends because we shared common interests (sci-fi, nerd culture, video games, I make chain male/battle armor for costuming purposes, 80's action movie addict). So I've always been very comfortable chit-chatting with guys, and because I was well on my way to 400 lbs, those conversations were only ever based on genuine mutual interest with ZERO romantic/sexual overtone.

Now, I'm having to recalibrate my perspective because these random conversations sometimes end up going in directions I'm not used to. I feel like I can't read people at all! I've been accused of flirting/leading people on for having the same friendly conversations I always have. Bro, I thought you were sincerely interested in leatherwork and bbq recipes. I didn't know engaging in small talk about hobbies meant I was giving you the green light to grope me! Yeesh.

Wow, I couldn't have egg beaters for 4 weeks. I tried at 2 weeks and got really sick. I was fine by 6 weeks, but it took awhile before it wouldn't make me nauseous.

The typical route for moving along a BM post-op goes in succession if each one fails to help:

LOTS of Water --> prune juice --> stool softener --> laxative

Your surgeon likely has a specific instructions for how he prefers to handle post-op issues. Definitely refer to that. Also, remember that you have barely eating, and none of it solid, so it is common to have very little to no waste.

My surgeon has nutritionists on staff but I felt that they had a program for everyone and were unwilling to change things at all. I had bad reactions to several foods they suggested and their advice was keep on trying until you can tolerate the food. I found that I was able to research different types of food and developed a diet that allowed me to have the necessary macronutrients while tolerable to my sleeve.

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It's great though that you genuinely tried to follow their advice and still utilized them as a resource before striking out on your own. That's one thing I dislike about many WLS nutritionists -- they have a "one size fits all" policy that doesn't always accommodate the needs of patients.

I had it a month out, but I didn't really enjoy it. I ended up doing the smoked eel as sashimi--the rice kills it for me. Nine months out I have it occasionally, but honestly, it isn't the same. I LOVE the spicy tuna and spicy crab rolls, but I tend to peel off some of the rice because it just gets too filling too quickly.

Got surprised on my last day of community college with a huge prestigious scholarship for university and grad school. Video cameras recording the event, promoted in newspapers/websites, immortalized in youtube clips. And I was horrified. I've avoided cameras for years, but there I was, all over the place at 353 pounds, and there was nothing I could do about it. Everyone was happy for me, but I was mortified by what I looked like.

It also took away a lot of the excuses I had -- the next six years of my life are paid for, both in tuition and living expenses, and although I still work as a nurse, that's all extra gravy for me to enjoy my life. Money and time were no longer an issue. But most of all, the prospect of a great future -- what was the point in getting this opportunity if I was gonna be dead or immobile in ten years anyhow? Why bother with grad school, speaking engagements, conferences, all the prestige and honors if I was fifty pounds away from being stuck in a rascal scooter?

So the day after I received that award, I decided WLS needed to happen ASAP (and it did, two and a half months later).

I guess for me, there was no rock bottom moment. There was only an "oh crap, I could actually have an awesome life" moment.

I am enjoying myself immensity with M. I sought someone with a compatible personality vs common interests and it is working out fabulously, so far. He is teaching me golf and he'll dabble in horseback riding. We both love games and play lots of board, card and dice games...and talk for hours and we are both very social. He is an attorney and kinda likes to"fight" - and politics is what we have chosen to fight about which seems to provide endless entertainment. I have totally met my match on the debate subject and love it too...neither of us take it personally and respectful so it isn't negative. Most importantly, we have incredible chemistry and compatibility - time together flies! He makes me feel really good.

I have met lots of his"people" and since he is a very social person that would be overwhelming to an introvert...we went to a social gathering where there must of been 30 people who wanted to catch up so I wound up having to fend for myself. Once I realized the situation, I turned on my party smile and met everyone. I even got hit on..ha...I had to tell the guy I was there as a guest of M. Not everyone's comfort zone, but I had lots of fun and left that party feeling energized(classic extrovert).

So, next is the hard part. He has been patient with me - I spent the first month going really slow (kidney stone helped!) He reads people well so just expressed interest without pressure and has waited for me to invite the next steps along the way in getting to know each other. It has been really great. However I know he wants to engage in my life more. I want him to as well, but it is triggering fear in me. I haven't felt quite like this toward someone since I have been dating and I do want more, but I am self protective of my heart, my family, friends, my daily life. At some level I feel like if I can keep "love" in a box and not part of my full life I can manage the pain when it ends. I've had a couple of boyfriends since being single and they hadn't even been to my home.

I recognize that this"with holding" is a part of me that I don't like and something I want to face. He has met my (grown) sons, been to my home once. I am having him over for dinner later this week and he offered to help me with a big ugly chore (washing truck and trailer that are green with winter gunk). Sounds ridiculous when I type it but I feel some anxiety over starting down this path, because I WANT it, I am honestly afraid of failing in love.

So here is my question -would you discuss it? I believe he has the general idea about my self protective nature so it probably doesn't need discussing but I don't want to be misinterpreted. This is hard for me and I suspect has been an obstacle for me in finding a good relationship. I have been in very few relationships -spent most of my adult life as part of a committed/married couple. I don't really want to discuss it, maybe I can just mention that this is part of my personality I am working to change and not make a big deal.

I think it's odd I feel so strongly about this , the counselor I used to see told me that she felt the reason I found so many men I meet "boring" or unattractive is really that self defense kicking in, I never give it a chance and I really do want to change - not just because of M, but because I want to keep growing as a human.

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Wow. You are tremendously self-aware, and that's just about the greatest asset someone can bring to a relationship. I think you should discuss your fears and self-protective tendencies with him, and emphasize that it's something you're working on incrementally. You're getting there an inch at a time, and it'd be nice if he was there to grow with you.

I think it's not only okay, but smart to keep part of yourself guarded, so long as you can unfold yourself a little bit more as the trust builds. After all, people who love indiscriminately aren't exactly healthy or wise about it either.

I'm happy for where you are. You seem like a lovely person, and so does he. Wishing you the best.

I'm also self-pay and only did a "nutrition workshop" with a bunch of other WLS-scheduled patients that really didn't offer me any new information. As a nurse, I've already taken extensive nutrition classes, so I didn't get anything out of it. But while I'm lucky to have a strong medical background, I do worry for those who are left to the whims of internet information and forum advice; it can be hard to tell what is accurate and what is dead wrong (albeit offered with good intentions).

I admit, I've been guilty of scrapping with others verbally on this forum when I think they're giving downright bad health information. I always recommend people go to established, reliable sources and use their doctors/nutritionists post-op to ask questions and get straight answers. Doctors aren't perfect (I've wanted to throttle more than one when I hear them tell patients stupid things), but it's always important to use the surgeon as a source of info BEFORE asking strangers on the internet.

I have Barrett's esophagus, and my reflux was so bad prior to the sleeve that I would wake up with vomit in my mouth quite often. It was especially frightening to me because my father developed throat cancer as a result of his untreated Barrett's syndrome. I was terrified of the reflux that so many people talk about, but in the 9 months since I've had the sleeve, NOTHING. I haven't needed acid reducers or any kind of OTC or meds to control it, and I haven't had a single incidence of reflux since. I can't tell you why, and it doesn't seem to be the norm, but I no longer have reflux with the sleeve (I did not receive any hiatal hernia repair or other alleviating procedures either).

I couldn't stomach shakes or Protein Soups (sorry powders?utm_source=BariatricPal&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=CommentLink" target="_ad" data-id="1" >unjury, I really tried to like you), so I lived on fairlife fat free milk during my puree/liquid stage. Fairlife milk is ultra filtered to remove sugar and lactose, and then fortified with extra Protein and Calcium. I would drink it cold with sugar free strawberry Syrup, or heat it with sugar free cocoa mix. It helped give me variety while meeting my protein needs.

Good luck, OP!

Unfortunately, you'll get a different answer for everyone. For me, the spasms/cramps after every bite/swallow lasted about two weeks. Severe to moderate pain in terms of the incision lasted 4-5 weeks, and it took about 2 months for all the surgical site pain to go (but I am an EXTREME case).

Same! I absolutely loved spicy food, but now even at 9 months out it makes me nauseous. Such a shame, because cajun and mexican spices are so delicious, but what can ya do? I've learned not to resent my sleeve, even when it does annoying stuff like ruin jambalaya for me

You'll hear different answers from everyone, but I allowed myself a couple big dinners with my favorite foods before my surgery. I did two weeks of low carb, high protein/lean meat, then a few days of having my favorite foods, then the 48 hour liquid diet my surgeon wanted before going under the knife. I know a lot of people think this sets a bad precedent or indicates not being ready for a life change, but I felt like I needed it, and I'm happy I did it. I remember those last meals with a fondness so powerful it borders on sexual

My high was 350, 331 at surgery 7/29/15 and 211 today!! I'm incredibly happy with the results and now focusing on wrapping my mind around where I am and how to stay here!

Haha, are we the same person? I was 353, had surgery in July, and today I'm 210!

I still have 65 lbs to go before I hit a healthy BMI, but I'm hoping a hard push will get me there by labor day!

@@BarrySue oh wow, I'm so sorry you had to experience that. Something like that happening was a HUGE fear of mine for a long time. Glad you're okay!

Thank you. It's not a common occurrence, I just drew a bad lot, I guess! Even though I was very large, I'm young, no mobility issues, incredibly healthy, and while I had no history of surgical/medical procedures, my pain tolerance was so high I routinely refused novocaine at the dentist ("just drill, I'll hold still!"), so I just didn't anticipate needing that kind of support. Ah, youth and inexperience!

Of course, some of my support group buddies were sixty year old women who were on treadmills a week after surgery, so it was just a pretty big personal blow. Ouch, my pride!

@@Crochet Queen, I'm not sure that embarrassment is the main reason, although it certainly could be for some and could be part of the reason for many. I have shared with a very small circle of people (doctors, family, boss, HR director and 1 friend). I do this because I am an extremely private person and don't wish for people to have a lot of insight into my personal health issues. I generally didn't share the fact that I had high blood pressure with people either.

Part of the reason that I am so private is that I don't like being the center of attention or concern. I don't like the interrogations that often come with people knowing. I also am not interested, in any way in their opinions. The few people that do know are already driving me crazy. How are you doing? How are you feeling? How's the weight loss coming? How is your eating? Are you able to exercise? Whew! I tire quickly of answering these questions. And these people are genuinely interested and supportive.

I have honestly only had one negative experience with anyone who knows, and ironically, that came from the nurse at my PCP. My PCP herself has been amazingly supportive and encouraging, but her nurse decided she should share with me that everyone she knows that has done this has failed and regained the weight, that people just need to change their behaviors, and then went on to tell me she had read about a new procedure where they inflate a baloon in your stomach, and added "maybe that one will actually work". Keep in mind, this was all said to me AFTER I had the surgery. I sort of wanted to punch her in the throat. Not because it impacts me personally, as I'm confident in my decision, but just because it was unnecessary and mean spirited.

Once I am through the majority of the weight loss and am in maintenance, I may share more. Largely because at that point, people hopefully will not find the need to check on my progress continually. As others have said, I am much more likely to share with other obese people. I do not want to mislead anyone and give them false hope. Also, if (when) I am able to achieve success, perhaps it will encourage them to at least explore their options.

This is similar to how I have handled other medical issues in the past. If someone came to me and was upset that they had just been diagnosed with High Blood Pressure, I was likely to share with them that I had been medicated for years and it was controllable.

Anyway, that's my perspective. It has nothing to do with embarrassment or shame for me. This is literally the only chance I have to control my weight. After decades of dieting I know that. It would be embarrassing to not do everything in my power to regain my health.

THIS! Are you and I the same person?

Telling people you have WLS is suddenly an invitation for people to ask inappropriate questions and make demands on your private health information. I don't fancy feeling like a pinata for every weird question people want to swing my way, and I also intensely dislike being the center of attention.

Plus, if I had a dollar for every "WLS failed so and so" anecdote, I could retire to the Hamptons by now.

I needed help for about three weeks, which is more extreme than most, but then I was very large and carried all my weight on my stomach. Going from sitting/standing or standing/sitting required help, and getting in and out of bed required help as well.

On days 3 and 4 at home post-op, I was unable to straighten up due to pain and ended up on the floor. The fire department had to come lift me up. It was a humiliating experience, and not something you want to repeat, OP. I would have a backup plan/support system in place just in case you have serious issues post-op.

I know the "20 minutes to feel full" thing works for most people, but at 9 months out I still wolf down my meals, and that isn't going to change. It hasn't inhibited my progress in any way, and unless it is cheating slider foods (which I avoid), I feel full at the same rate regardless of how fast or slow I eat.