Kind of a loner and don't really reach out much on these kind of things. Feeling a little bit challenged and have been sticking with the diet and doing well. Kind of annoyed with not being able to get back to the gym right away and lift to be honest. Having mild to moderate gas pain but I suppose in due time it'll get better from what I read.
I kind of already had this feeling, not in relation to the sleeve, just about life in general, but lately that seems to be changing.
exulansis
n. the tendency to give up trying to talk about an experience because people are unable to relate to it—whether through envy or pity or simple foreignness—which allows it to drift away from the rest of your life story, until the memory itself feels out of place, almost mythical, wandering restlessly in the fog, no longer even looking for a place to land.
Hard to explain without going into the fact I'm a cancer survivor, and that feeling I have is prevalent when it comes to relating to most people and expressing myself. Don't mistake it for a lack of caring or that I'm depressed. it's just that I'm enervated with trying to explain things that are not just simply understood and people think that a heart to heart is going to allow them to experience the sum whole of my life and get it. I am feeling detached a lot lately, you eat and consume one way your whole life and now that's changed. This feeling I'm now having sounds like one describes as withdrawal, I've not the desire to attempt to break the diet and blow out my staples or cause a leak, but that doesn't mean I don't have the acute awareness that I'm having a bit of an existential crisis with the changes. I've been actually talking with family and friends about it, which I was happy to keep this as much to myself as possible. Kind of weird for me to be sharing this much, but I suppose there is a first time for everything or maybe at this point I am ready... I noticed one thing that did improve my bleh was having some bullion (salt) because my BP was disastrously low and the nurse that works for my surgeon agreed. Anytime I stood up I was nearly passing out. I never usually sleep this much either. Never really had depression before, but from the sounds of it I have a lot of the symptoms as well as physiological issues that are causing this general feeling of ennui toward life. Working from home and being in the swing with that has been a good distraction at least. I'm a little moody and it's hard to provide tech support over the phone to idiots, I mean cx... lol
Can't wait to get approval to exercise properly again, this waiting and listlessness sucks.
