OutsideMatchInside

how will a bypass fix it? is the pain in your intestines?

Copper IUD.

Lip balm, face wash, pillow for ride home.

Make sure you keep your liquids up. A lot of people think they are going through caffeine withdrawal and that is causing headaches but really when they stop drinking their favorite beverages they lower their Fluid intake overall and the headaches are related to lack of hydration. I never suffer from caffeine withdrawal just lack of mental concentration. I can counter balance it with short walks to raise alertness. Good luck

Think about the kind of woman willing to entertain a married man in any kind of way (she has no idea if you are telling the truth about your wife, married men tell worse lies), and then think about if that is really the kind of person you would want to associate with.

Therapists advise married people to date? Really? That is messy as hell. I would really focus on myself not dating. You are still on an important personal health journey. Focus on that and the right partner will come when the time is right.

Water consistency liquids go right throw your stomach to your intestines. They will not stretch your stomach. I watched live on screen during my swallow test. Liquids empty instantly into your intestines. That is why you don't want to drink when you eat or drink high calorie Protein free drinks. The go right through your stomach. It is also impossible to stretch your stomach back to where it was. The sleeve isn't the same as the pouch the part of your stomach that is cut off is the stretchy part. They use that stretchy part with the bypass but not the sleeve. Bro science isn't science. Now foods make a Chai tea that is no calories no sugars and for dieters. You can drink it with no sweeteners and it is delicious.

My favorite right now is Swai. It is affordable, and barely tastes like fish. It is basically just pure Protein and it tastes like whatever you season it with. It is soft light and flaky, and very moist. I can easily eat between 6 and 7 ounces at a time now. This allows me to get my protein in for the day without having to use shakes. http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/348954-baked-swai-fillet/

It totally depends on the moisture content of the meat, how much I can eat. I can eat chicken or turkey and struggle to make my protein because I can only eat so little or I can eat white fish and easily meat my protein goals.

I used to guzzle 16oz without taking a breath. I thought taking sips would be a struggle but the first thing I had after surgery was a sip of ice Water and the ice water hurt so bad, I couldn't tolerate cold stuff for a while. Remembering that paid made it easy to take sips. Now I can probably drink and ounce a swallow. I just have to remember to pause, but I can drink of water relatively quickly.

Stevia, if you don't have access to a health food store for the higher quality. Swerve is in walmart and it is pretty good.

@@pimmar I don't use anything with splenda it in anymore, but if you really love white mochas, you can make them at home. This is a very very similar, almost identical taste. I have a Verismo machine and used to make these in the winter, but I don't eat splenda so I gave them up. If I really get desperate for one though, this is the solution. http://www.amazon.com/Torani-Sugar-Syrup-White-Chocolate/dp/B005GYJUJ2/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1443300897&sr=8-2&keywords=sugar+free+white+chocolate+syrup They are $9 or something like that at World Market. World Market also has a HUGE selection of all these sugar free syrups so if you want to make anything sugar free, hit up world market and there is a wall of syrups to choose from.

I will have to try again, I had one and was underwhelmed. Maybe it was the barista. They are hard to make. It takes skill, the rookie baristas have a hard time with it. What I like about them is with the milk and the way they are made they are naturally a little sweet and you don't need sweetener.

You might but a ton of people are eating yoplait crap and wondering why they aren't losing as they want or gaining. A lot of people that post here don't have a good grasp on nutrition or labels.

I wasn't told how to sleep, and I slept on my stomach on the 4th day. I will say from my personal experience, a 45 degree angle was the MOST painful position to be in after surgery. It seems to put stress on your stomach muscles, and it makes it harder for things to go down. I learned real quick to not even slouch or it hurt.

These hit and run new posters with nothing in their profiles to let you know anything about their surgery, their random complaints with no information, and when people are kind enough to respond to them, they never even respond back. Trolls.

You can make your own low carb Cookies and you can make or buy low carb high Fiber bread. You don't have to give those things up forever. You do however have to have some self control. People on this board will tell you not to eat cookies and other things while they are snarfing down yogurt that is full of sugar. These are my favorite Snacks right now. http://www.eatmeguiltfree.com/ They taste just good enough to seem like a brownie, but not good enough to be a brownie, no triggers. They are just a good tasting Protein product, better than a Quest bar. A cookie recipe http://www.ibreatheimhungry.com/2013/03/lemon-almond-shortbread-cookies-low-carb-gluten-free.html Also search for low carb mug cakes. Just remember just because something it low carb, you still need to track all of your calories and watch your portions. The bread is harder, there are lots of low carb bread recipes out there, and there are also low carb breads you can purchase. You can get healthy life at most grocery stores in the midwest for $1.99-2.99 a loaf, not sure about the rest of the country. One slice has 6 net carbs. http://www.healthylifebread.com/ Or you can order bread http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=bl_dp_s_web_0?ie=UTF8&search-alias=aps&field-keywords=Great+Low+Carb+Bread+Co. Which as you see is expensive and should probably just be treat level. You can have a lot of sandwiches on lettuce leafs, you can order from Jimmy Johns like that. Don't let yourself feel deprived, because that can lead to making a lot of bad choices or binge eating. Just learn how to make good options yourself at home. Low Carb cheesecake is another great option. I drink Water at the movies. After surgery it is a great time to just sit and chug a bottle of water with no interruptions. I never ate at the movies before anyway, we always went right after a meal and were already full. We go almost weekly, if you add in movie snacks it makes it too expensive.

Oh yeah Flat Whites are perfection. I haven't had one since surgery. I might splurge on one today There are lots of good options at Starbucks. I used to be addicted to white mochas, a triple venti white mocha was my drink of choice for years. It has like 900 calories though, a 1/2 day of calories, and I would get a coffee cake with it. I broke myself of that habit years ago. If you can carry your own sweetener and learn to love black coffee of very little cream, you really don't have to give up your coffee forever. You just have to be smart about it. I have given up basically everything with surgery, no alcohol and a laundry list of other things. I'm not giving up coffee. Plus after surgery your mind can be foggy and your concentration not what it used to be and coffee helps.

I have BariActiv vitamins and I take them on an empty stomach all the time. They are spaced out during the day, so if I didn't take them on an empty stomach it would be impossible.

The reason my doctor frowns on caffeine is because it is a dehydrator. I am told I must drink an ounce of Water for every ounce of caffeinated beverage. Caffeine is definitely an appetite suppressant. Caffeine was the main ingredient in the diet pills of the 90s. There are studies contradicting this line of thought. http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2014/01/13/262175623/coffee-myth-busting-cup-of-joe-may-help-hydration-and-memory http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2014/01/13/262175623/coffee-myth-busting-cup-of-joe-may-help-hydration-and-memory People in the UK drink coffee in the hospital after surgery. I have been looking for these. Can you only order them online? I purchased them at my local health food store.

Some Drs think caffeine is an appetite stimulant. I find it is the exact opposite. I can drink coffee all day and never eat (this was even before surgery). My favorite thing right now are stevia Water drops. They add just a little something to my water, without rat poison sweeteners. http://sweetleaf.com/stevia-water-enhancer/ Cold brew Black coffee or with a dab of cream is great also.

You don't have to give up coffee forever. You will have to give up the high calorie coffee drinks. I have a cup of TJ cold brew every morning, sometimes I blend it with unflavored Protein. If you love Starbucks, an iced cold brew black is something you can keep drinking. You can bring your own Stevia drops. The thing to watch with coffee is the acid so it doesn't irritate your stomach. Cold brew coffee is a perfect solution for that.

I think I might try to sell my clothes on ThredUp. I have a lot of clothes and almost all of them are new, purchased in the past 12-18 months and only worn 5 or less times. I have a lot of expensive jeans someone will appreciate. I will definitely use the referral link.

If you are still in plus sizes, consignment stores and goodwill are going to be a waste of time. The time you spend looking for something will cost you more than just buying something cheap. I would suggest dresses + tights/leggings. As in wear dresses with tights and leggings under them in the fall/winter. You can wear dresses for more sizes than pants. Leggings and tights are cheap to replace as you drop sizes. You could wear summer maxi dresses with a jacket or blazer. you can change the look of almost any dress with a belt so get a lot of belts. Stretchy ones with big buckles will last longer than standard belts. Right now I am kind of where you are. My 28 jeans are all too large. I tried on 26 jeans at the store, and they fit last week but in another week or 2 they will be too large. I'm not going to buy any jeans until I am in a 24, and I will just get one pair, and another when I hit 22. I usually buy clothes every week but since surgery I haven't bought anything and I am kinda dying to shop, lol.

The original post was not tongue in cheek at all. I'm not even sure it was cleverly crafted click bait.