IttyBit

Hi, my name is Christi. I found BariatricPal by way of the Big Book of Roux en Y. I am currently pre-op and in the process of determining if I want to commit to this extreme change in lifestyle. My surgery date is set for June 30, pending approval of pre-ops. As of right now, I am 90% sure that I want the surgery. I have an an all-or-nothing type personality, but I'm not the type to push the envelope or take risks. When I commit to a diet and exercise, I give it my all; unfortunately, as proven by the many diets I have failed, my all isn't good enough. As far as a healthy lifestyle goes, I am either "on" or "off," but my biggest problem is that when I'm off, my eating habits are extreme - my diet consists of fast food, ice cream and pastries. I think the reason for the extreme off behavior is that I haven't found a good enough tangible reason to NOT go to extremes. "Tangible" is the key word there - yes, I may be shortening my life and yes, I may be missing out on a better quality of life, but those reasons are so hypothetical when most days I'm tired and hungry after a long day at work and I want something that is convenient and tastes good; uh, what do you know, there's McDonalds, perfect, won't even have any dishes to do! - unfortunately, at that point in time the fast tasty food is much more tangible than trying to live healthy. The the surgery will give me the very tangible reason I need stop acting out on impulse desires. For me, knowing I'm going to get sick and run the risk of a rupture is much more tangible than the thought that maybe I'll live longer and maybe I'll have a better quality of life. I am a cautiously optimistic person by nature. I welcome any thoughts anyone may have about me, my reasons for the journey and/or the journey.