Daughter2015

This is a question about my changing relationship with my mother,me at 29.. her at 52 My mother has been a wonderful mother to me growing up. There is no exaggeration there. However... as I have gotten older, I have been resentful of my parents for very dysfunctional eating habits that they evolved partly together. My mother would always make our fun surrounded by food, generally with no concern about the unhealthiness of it. I was only overweight as a child during my "awkward stage" but I came out of that as I grew.. and I was always an active kid. As I entered adolescence I remember being embarrassed of my obese mother to some degree. I entered a stage where I wanted to model, mstly because a friend encouraged me because she thought I was beautiful. I was too short and not fit for it. I did however start to severely restrict my food during a time when my boyfriend moved away to a different country with his famiy. I was already thin and actractive, but as I dropped weight, it really impacted my body shape... and I liked it. My mother was concerned at that time and also commented that I was losing my womanly figure..I grew out of it. I still exercised intensely during sports and I kept a normal, "attractive" weight. My mother always was proud of her beautiful daughter, without judgment. I remember eating lke crazy at times. but it didn't affect my weight because I was young and extremely active. My parents continued to eat unhealthily, and I was a participant as well. Fast forward, I entered the obese category and stayed that way from early twenties on after an anxiety provoking issue, it was a time I was in a very difficult college program and lving at home to save money. At that time... or maybr beyond, I began to resent my parents attitude on food. It WAS dysfunctional. I started to realize, other people do not eat and think about food the way we do. It made me angry that I was being robbed of my youth bc of my weight, with my hand, and the belief set my parents gave me.My WEIGHT since has never since been satisfactory, constant yo yoing.. because I can do extreme, when I really care... but mostly.. I haven't...and do the extreme, at the other spectrum I think that has to do w my parents and how they thought of food. Ive fluctuated from a siz 9 (thin) to a size 16 ( gross). Now my mother had her surgery.. she makes comments that hurt my feelings. It is not that im jealous... or even that I feel left behind. I am only left behind if I chose to.. however she has never admitted to how her eating habits effected me - she thinks that I was thin growing up, so its fine. That makes me furious. The comments she make may seem benign to others.. but things like....."just because you can fit into It, doesn't mean you should wear it" or don't eat that extra hamburger, I want it for lunch", "omg, I lost 4lbs this week... im not even remotely hungry anymore... and on and onnnnnnnnnn that talk goes." I am pd off because she is judging me, after she has actually not been a positive role model for me as a child I am angry... I used to think the world of my mother, but my respect for her is dwindling....... I don't quite understand it, but I don't like how she is behaving. She is more judgemental, and more insensitive to her daughter that SHE fucked iup I need insight on this.