ssourgirl

@@LSF Thank you! I kept my cool but was held my ground. I just found out the bariatric surgeon that was on call this weekend was the head of the entire hospital system's bariatric department. I REALLY wish I had known that when he came by. I'm sure he'd like to know how the doctors in his own hospital are treating his bariatric patients. Granted, we aren't in the location that has the bariatric floor, but still. This hospital system is an award winning bariatric hospital.

@@Inner Surfer Girl no, I didn't talk to him about it today, this was the surgeon's partner who is on call this weekend. I plan to talk to him tomorrow.

@@Inner Surfer Girl the bariatric surgeon comes by every day too.

Thanks @ShellMilliner Unfortunately, we have no other family in the area so it's all up to me. I'm making sure I'm getting sleep, moving around, going home to sleep when I can.

No @@BLERDgirl, he is just the hospital internist who is on her case along with the Urologist and Bariatric Surgeon. He is not associated at all with the Bariatric Team.

Hi RNYGal, thanks for checking on her. She was able to eat a little bit of mashed potatoes last night, first food in 4.5 weeks. She was in alot of pain throughout the night though. This morning, the nausea is coming back. She just threw up in fact. She hasn't had anything but a few sips of water today to take a pill. She wasn't able to take her oral pain meds because of the nausea. He stopped the IV pain medication and put her on oral only. She's also low on magnesium so they have her on IV Magnesium. And I was told by the charge nurse today, they can't remove him as her doctor until tomorrow. I told her that we do not want to see him AT ALL. This to me is unacceptable. And the way they have to do it is for him to call another doctor in the rotation. This gives him ample opportunity to cloud his judgement with his bullshit. I'm sure he'll deny exactly what he said. I plant to talk to the Bariatric Surgeon about what he said yesterday too.

@@BLERDgirl this was the hospital doctor, not the bariatric surgeon. @@desertgirl_74 thank you!

@@newbeginning77 It is too high up in the ureter and her ureter and her ureters are smaller than normal. He tried doing laser lithotripsy but again, ureter too narrow for it to work without bursting the ureter.

Thanks @RNYGal @Mstdst13@missheidi47 I am most definitely going to talk to the hospital administrators. I'm still fuming and my daughter is still really upset. The nurses and techs here are really great and I've been so impressed with the rest of the care we've gotten here up until that experience. I barely got any sleep last night myself and this has been an immensely stressful week on both of us. I didn't need a lecture on how badly I've raised my daughter and she didn't need to hear how callous and discriminatory he was. He even said that the gastric sleeve wouldn't help! To me the surgery was the last and most invasive steps to take after trying a multitude of things that didn't work. What the hell else does he expect us to do?!

I like the first one. It really caught my eye in the forum threads.

"what a F**&+ d**k!" My thoughts exactly! I was absolutely floored. I even said that, "you try not eathing anything for 4.5 weeks and let's see how well you can walk down the hall." The only reason this nausea didn't cause more severe malnutrition and damage is actually BECAUSE she had extra fat her body could burn so it at least kept her from more serious complications. Try doing that with a person who had little body fat. I'm still SO ANGRY. He really ruined the small victory she had with the nausea abating. The first sign of hope in 5 weeks.

The stent has started to ease the nausea some! She's still miserable though and in alot of pain. She is shakey and weak and it's hard to walk. She wasn't able to sleep all night. We just had a horrible experience with the hospital doctor when he came to check on her. I still can't believe it myself. She tells him of the pain she's having and that it was hard to sleep and he asks if she's been up walking. She said she can only go short distances before getting shakes and feeling severe nausea and weakness. She said her body aches all over like she has a really bad flu. I reminded him she hasn't had any food for 4.5 weeks. He stressed that she needs to be up moving around and I agreed we could try but I'm worried about the fall risk. The nurse had told us NOT TO because the fall risk outweighed the benefits at this point. She's walking to and from the bathroom several times a day. He asked to talk to me in the hall. I got a full lecture about how she needed to lose weight and that he doesn't believe in Fibromyalgia. She needs to lose weight and NOW. That the fact that she is overweight is what is causing her all the pain. I reminded him of the following 1. She is in this hospital BECAUSE she has a kidney stoned still lodged in her ureter. 2. Surgery failed to get it out because the urologist said her ureters are abnormally small. 3. She hasn't eaten ONE THING in 4.5 weeks and has had such severe nausea this entire time she could barely keep liquids down. 4. She was dehydrated and her body has been through a lot of trauma with no sustenance. 5. YES she needs to lose weight but how will that solve the issue RIGHT NOW? Furthermore, that's why we opted for the gastric sleeve. He was such an arrogant ass about it I am still in disbelief. I asked him what exactly he expected me to do about it right this minute. I said that's not the reason we are here we're here because of the acute pain, chronic nausea and kidney stones. Her kidneys were dilated and backed up from the blockage. Kidney stones aren't caused by being fat. They run in my family and even my slim father has had to have surgery on them more than once becasue HE TOO has abnormally small ureters. It's called genetics. My daughter overheard and has not stopped crying. I am so tired of doctor's judging and making us feel like less than human beings less deserving of good medical care. If I had gone in for a physical, I would expect that kind of talk but not when she's in the hospital with acute pain with an acute kidney stone issue and bordering on malnutrition and dehydration from a MISERABLE 4.5 weeks doing a very drastic procedure to try to LOSE WEIGHT. I'm so angry and upset for my daughter. I demanded the nurse get us a different doctor. I refuse to allow her to be treated like that when she is clearly miserable and just turned 18 so is still basically a child. This is the sweetest, kindest child too. I'm just heartbroken for her.

Are you a chef/cook or a server? What about channeling your love of food to healthier alternatives. Think about how many people go through this surgery and are depressed at eating the same foods over and over. As a foodie myself, it almost feels like going through mourning. So much of my time was spent cooking awesome food, going to the latest restaurants etc. Maybe you can channel your love of food to experimenting with different recipes, blogging about great recipes for those living with the sleeve, adding menu items to the restaurant that are healthier alternatives, going to chef school and being one of those chefs who do amazing foods in small bites plates, open a food truck. If those things don't appeal to you, maybe just take a few classes at a college doing other things that might interest you. Maybe get in on the business side of restaurants. etc. You're young, you have options. Think of this as an open door to new things!

Thanks, LSF...it's been a really long road and frankly I'm exhausted, drained and I feel so incredibly helpless seeing my daughter in such pain. It has got to stop!

Thanks for the thoughts and prayers. No, they're not sending her home yet. She's still in a great deal of pain and still nauseated with no relief from Zofran or Phenergren. She hasn't been able to drink anything because of the nausea and vomiting and since this is 4 weeks of no food or drink, the bariatric surgeon needs to come back in and evaluate. Of course, it's the weekend and he's off so whoever is on call will come by possibly. If this procedure takes TWO WEEKS before he can go back in and it still causes the severe nausea and pain, I don't see how she can handles this given her inability to hydrate and verging on malnourishment. I researched and there is another procedure he could do that would get it out now. It's slightly more invasive but not vastly. I am going to call him tomorrow to see why he isn't choosing that option. Seems to me he should be given that her body, mind and soul are giving out.

@@RNYGal, thank you! Unfortunately, they weren't able to remove the stone and he had to put a stent in to dilate the ureter. He'll have to wait 2 weeks to go in and get in once it dilates enough or he'd risk damaging her ureter. I'm heartbroken for her. I have no idea how this will affect her nausea and pain but the urologist says the stent will alleviate the pain. Fingers crossed! Now the bariatric surgeon will have to determine what to do if the nausea continues and what to do with her nutrition and hydration if the nausea persists until she can come back for the stone removal surgery.

My daughter is in surgery right now to remove the kidney stone. She's been in serious pain for 5 days now and the nausea is beyond horrible. I'm praying that this cures the pain AND the nausea. This kid has suffered ENOUGH!!

Sounds good!

Thanks so much for sharing! You should consider starting a blog and posting pictures of the food.

Yes, in the email just below the box with the response quoted in it, there is a link to click to unfollow. It will take you to a page that allows you to unfollow that particular post. There is also a page that has all of them on one page. I'm not exactly sure how to get to that from your phone but I know online you can click on your name in the upper right and click "Content I Follow" This will allow you to see all of the posts you've posed in and allow you to change your following prefrerences.

Do you mean delete the thread or disable getting notifications in your email when a repsonse is posted?

Yeah, my daughter's was super fast, like within 2 days.

OK the surgeon came by and we had a good talk. He does not want to do a scope because of the risk of perforation this early. He says scoping risks perforation before 6 weeks out. He is wondering also if the nausea hasn't been this pesky kidney stone all along so he wants to wait and see if the nausea is still present after this stone is passed. He plans to start with nutrients IV if things do not get better after the stone passes. The urologist says we need to wait for the stone to pass. It may be small enough to pass, not large enough to warrant the Lithotripsy and he doesn't want to go in and get it unless it's crucial. So, we are on a wait and see basis for alot of things. I feel better having talked to them and establishing a plan of care of sorts.

Wow. Some "friend." It never ceases to amaze me how weight is villified. How about telling her you were thinking the same thing, only if she grew another 6 inches she might be prettier. Sorry, I know that is not turning the other cheek but that's just plain rude of her. I'd dump her. You don't need friends like that.

Yep, she swims and does Yoga. It doesn't cure it but it helps.