WLSResources/ClothingExch

I've never watched the show and would like to have seen the plus-size entries. All of the "reality" shows are elaborate, drawn-out game shows. I'm including the competitions in various fields and the others, such as "Dancing with Who?" Worst are the shopping-for-a-wife or -husband shows. Equally bad are the weight-loss shows. Yes, people lose weight, but are required to humiliate themselves in the process. I don't even know about the controversy surrounding them, the claims of the producers or what really happens to the contestants once the game is over. Everyone wants to be a celeb. The genre caught on, brings in phenomenal ad revenue and costs tons less to produce than "scripted" programming. (The only one I like and watch occasionally is "The Great British Baking Show" on public TV. The competitors are citizen bakers rather than professionals. Maybe I like it because I'm not a baker and find the principles, along with the assignments, interesting. The people who do the judging aren't snarky and snide for ratings.)

@@Bellaitalian -- You fooled me. Oregon is nice, but I thought you were calling from Italia. Congratulations on your surgery date. Try calling the hospitals that are in reasonable distance from home. They usually welcome outside patients totheir support group meetings. If you haven't already, check on whether there's a BP group in your area by going to the "Forums" tab, above, then to the first option on the drop-down. From there, follow the obvious bread-crumb trail. Best wishes.

@@lace131 -- I'm glad you finally went in to loosen your band and sorry that you had such a miserable week. Since you didn't refer to it, I'll say that most practices, when doing an adjustment to add Fluid, have the patient drink some Water to be sure it goes down comfortably. It is possible that it doese, but later or the next day, the story changes (I think that's rare, though). If you ever again find after you're home that you can't swallow comfortably, call the office and get back in quickly. I think your surgeon's take on giving it a chance makes sense; you're only now beginning to put it to use. Last week's incident was bad, but not necessarily an indication of anything. Maybe some time in the future there will be problems, but who knows? What's happening with reflux now?

@@natnat919 -- You're doing so well in two ways: Obviously, the weight loss and recognizing that there's other work that needs doing. If I may, it sounds as though you've derived your identify and value from the views of other people. Those sources necessarily provide only a vague outline of a person. As @@2goldengirl said, we come from within -- from knowing who we are, what we want, what's important to us, our places in the world, and on forever. GoldenGirl and @@Inner Surfer Girl have given you some excellent suggestions. I'd like to add a book, a workbook developed as a guide to taking stock, "The Weight Loss Surgery Coping Companion: A Practical Guide for Coping with Post-Surgery Emotions," by Tanie Miller Kabala, a psychologist who works with people who have had or are heading to surgery. If you get the print version (I understand it's also an ebook), use a notebook for the exercises; keep the book clean so that you can go back to it any time as things keep changing. (Full disclosure: I received a review copy so that people who attend my clothing exchange can take a look. I have no involvement with it and no financial interest.) You can also try the website shrinkyourself.com, also put up by a psychologist, Roger Gould. It deals with emotional eating and much more, including making the mental and emotional adjustments. There is an option for the free, emailed newsletters as well as a pay version and Dr. Gould's book, neither of which I'm familiar with).

The suggestions to call the hospitals in your area make good sense, of course. I take it that your own practice doesn't have an RD or two that they recommend? You can also try asmbs.org (check the "state chapters" link) or lipo.org (LI Post Ops). You may get a few LI people stopping in out of curiosity. If I may, however, a tip for the future: If you want to attract BP users on LI, mention it in your topic title.

This should get you over it: Such an attractive image, you-all belching on the couch for a couple three hours.

This is only two weeks out of a lifetime. What will you do after surgery when it really is a lifetime? "I can do anything for two weeks."

@@Joz31 -- Take your time deciding. There's no emergency. As to your last note back there? I'd rather see you live a happy weight loss patient. @@laguerr13 -- You've chosen the way you wish to contribute to others. Each of us chooses our own. "Paying it forward" takes many forms.

@@bugsy72 -- That's much better: You made it through Day #1. Of course you can do this. You can do anything. As you said, one day at a time is a good way to go. Viewing sugar from this angle, it's neither friend nor comfort. It's a stupor-inducer I'm fighting with it, hating it and myself with every bite. As my surgery was approaching, I was surprised to hear people talk about a "last meal." I don't think it would have occurred to me, surprising as that is. With the notion planted, I considered what would be my last pig-out. It never happened. After a little thought I knew that one more time meant nothing. It's only one more, so why not let the last one be the last one? I also never fretted or mourned foods I thought I'd have to give up, certainly not the ones I knew would be problematic with the lapband. In no way am I saying that I don't/didn't have my own food crazinesses, just not the ones I heard people gritching most about in my early days. How about a little ladies' bet? It's over and done now, so nothing worth lamenting, but I say that, one of these days, when you recognize that you've got the power, you'll think it was silly to tack on those seven pounds so close to surgery. @@miiasan -- "If I sound a bit harsh, I apologize. I think you need a reality check though - and I am just giving you tough love." Harsh? Is that the best you've got? You're a lamb chop with great ideas. Put those gloves on and get in there!

@@diane1 -- Your note of the 19th just caught my eye. You have my apology for having hijacked your topic out of obliviousness. It looks as though tubal is the sensible solution for you. Unless you already know for sure that the bariatric surgeon will do two-in-one, certainly discuss the options. Then decide whether you're comfortable with his/her tubal track record or would prefer a separate procedure by a gyn.

Oh. I suppose that precludes getting the kitten I've been wanting, Mommy? Poop? Okay, as long as you remember that I only do dishes. Somewhere I have a photo of myself sitting in a friend's house with a baby blue jay sitting on my head. They'd found him in their yard, the proverbial "naked ... blue jay," the size of a pinkie. The local, licensed wildlife rehabilitator was leaving for vacation, so gave them the info for bird care, including little lessons to teach him to forage. When I arrived at their upstate NY home for a visit, the bird was feathered, but grayish-brownish. In the week I was there, his blue color began to show, his crest began to form and his sweet chirp began changing to a jay's squawk. Upon seeing and hearing birds fly overhead in all directions when I took him into the yard in his cage, he began jumping, flapping and making noise, He knew that he was born (hatched, really, but you knew that) to be up there with them. I took him back in to the kitchen to give him his first flying lessons. He taught himself the rest. A few weeks later, my friends drove with him in his cage to a heavily wooded area, took him out of the car and opened the cage door so that he flew off to live his natural life.

@Eumoirous-- Being “terrified” of being denied surgery won’t help your preliminary exploration. Your situation is tricky, but not necessarily insurmountable. My first bit of advice, easy to give, but not necessarily to put into practice, is to view each step as a task unto itself. If you do, I think you’ll be calm and comfortable enough to continue with the next steps. Feeling terror now, when you’ve barely begun, makes no sense. I’m not a medical professional, but I’m happy to give you my thoughts with the hope that they’ll help you compose your list of questions for the professionals. It’s my understanding that it is the med insurance plans that require a psychological evaluation to determine whether a prospective patient: has realistic expectations of surgery understands that he must follow through with the usual means of losing weight, primarily changing eating habits and food choices and exercising understands and is capable of following instructions given by the surgical practice who has out-of-the-ordinary circumstances, such as a mental health disorder, the insurer may want documentation of a significant period of stability and statement of ongoing treatment and the patient’s adherence Because of the last, it’s possible that your own psychiatrist or psychologist should do the eval. Statements from them to the insurer in support of your having surgery probably would be appropriate documents in your application package. Consult with a surgeon as well as your psychiatrist. If you see a psychologist, that person, too. Your well-being apart from weight loss is an important part of the equation. For example, does something about surgery and/or the healing process indicate that an ECT treatment be postponed? If so, is it advisable? These are things that need to be determined by your “team” in consultation with each other -- and you, of course. If, after all that, you’re self-pay rather than insured, being accepted probably will be much easier. In such case, I think it important for you to consider some of the possibilities. You want a surgeon who possesses professional ethics and human decency. If, in your desire for surgery, you would consider a trade for an SAD episode, consider again. I don’t know the answer, but I do know that the decision shouldn’t be casual. Anyone who has surgery can benefit for a support network all along the way. It's built in at the surgical practice, here at BP and in the support groups that most practices offer. If the practice that you use doesn't have a group, try other hospitals in your area. Most welcome all patients. I respect and admire your wish to be healthy. For what it’s worth, I’m rooting for you.

As a matter of fact I do. It's good, cathartic idiot work -- most beneficial. But if I do the dishes, you and your husband have to do the cooking. Deal? You realize, of course, that you're adopting someone probably older than your parents? Cute, eh? I fit in already. Notice the "eh?"

@@zahlis -- Congratulations on being approved. Keep reaching out because the early stages can be confusing. A lot of us turn dopey and insecure -- as though we've been told we have low IQ's -- even when the instructions are clear as can be. It gets better soon enough. Start attending the support group your practice offers; if it doesn't have a group. check other medical centers in your area. Virtually all, as far as I know, welcome patients from the competition. Sitting face to face in a group small enough for everyone to speak if they choose wonderful. I've gained a good friendship that goes beyond what took us to the same room 6 1/2 years ago. I didn't know that the book is available in "e" version, but I suppose most things are.

@@wannaBthinsoon -- You're gorgeous, well worth the scroll. @@Joz31 -- Good, glad you changed your mind. You belong up in lights, too.

@@Cervidae -- If you hadn't come along, I'd never have noticed. It caught up while I slept. It really was "Sep" when I last logged out.

My surgery was Oct 2009, which I'd like to show in the left-screen data. How to get "Oct" in there? No matter what I try when I edit, it comes back as Sep 2009. Originally I had Oct 23 2009 showing, but don't want a day included as it's only part of the story.

You're the first person I've come across anywhere to notice this NSV. Nifty. Or is it an SV? Who cares? We take nifty wherever we find it. Keep going.

Yes. I vaguely recall that going above 140g is not smart, but don't take my word for it. Do the research and check with the RD at your surgery practice.

Good, you catch on. You have a brilliant future.

@@tjones181 -- I'm sorry you've been having such a terrible time for so long. When were the photos taken?

The worst I'll ever tell you is to shut up and eat your vegetables. This is new to you, therefore, new again in the world. It's like a collective Groundhog Day. Your fear of being slim is common. There are many things that may go into it, including fear of the [at least long-term] unknown and fear of giving up the shield, cumbersome as it is. You've already devised a "divorce" and, because it is helping, it's great. It can take time to work through the real emotions or even to uncover them. That's okay. At some point you may want to work with a therapist. There are also print and online resources. Try http://shrinkyourself.com the website of psychologist Roger Gould. It's about emotional eating and emotions related to weight and weight control overall. The site offers a pay version and, of course, sells Dr. Gould's book, but you can stick with the free emailed newsletters if you register. Another is a guided workbook, "The Weight Loss Surgery Coping Companion: A Practical Guide for Coping with Post-Surgery Emotions," by Tanie Miller Kabala, also a psychologist. It might even be useful to you now, before surgery. Because things keep changing through the journey, I suggest using a notebook for the exercises. Keeping the book itself clean makes it easier to revisit it as needed. [Full disclosure: My WLS NP gave me her copy to look through while I was waiting for my appt. I requested a review copy from Dr. Kabala so that the people who attend the clothing exchange I organize could browse through it. I have no role in sales and no financial interest.] What you're experiencing now is expected and manageable.

@@TinyTink -- "Sestamibi" is new to me. I won't look it up because your take on it is better than anything else could ever be. Not just a vacation, but a very sexy vacation. In a remote part of the world. With a tall, dark, handsome stranger. Who is fluent in Italian and Romanian. And Ukrainian, worlds nicer than Russian. And... And.... Quick, the smelling salts. Which way to the airport?

@@Joz31 -- I don't do facebook either, but here it is from Uncle Google. http://www.facebook.com/KCBariatric @@wannaBthinsoon -- Too many names and too much junk. Please point yourself out. This is exciting! I found the practice's website first. A video features a few patients who've done/are doing well -- happy stuff. One of the women, though, said something that she may have invented for effect. She claims that at 240 lbs, she couldn't stay afloat in Water. It works the other way. A large person will rise to the surface, while skinny, thin and slim people are respectively lower in the water. Fat makes for buoyancy. Way back when I was perhaps 'only' 225-ish, I cringed when, in a pool, I felt that most of my body was on the surface with very little partly submerged. My fear was that someone would notice. http://kcbariatric.com/

All this and a stand-up act, too. Thanks for the entertainment. I'm glad you're feeling so good.