WLSResources/ClothingExch

@@Alex Brecher, thanks for taking on the bug -- the mosquito that devoured Cleveland.

Steph, come closer. I want to talk to you. IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE ADORABLE, YOU LITTLE CHOWDERHEAD. Even the sweat is appealing to the males. They're admiring a woman who is serious about what she's doing. It's not easy to internalize the reality. Until it's no longer so disconcerting -- and it will come around -- just smile and nod once in a while as people do when they're sharing an experience. Or not. Just don't allow a moment's thought that you're some sort of misfit. "Adorable" is your word of the day. Tomorrow, too. Steph, come closer. I want to talk to you. IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE ADORABLE, YOU LITTLE CHOWDERHEAD. Even the sweat is appealing to the males. They're admiring a woman who is serious about what she's doing. It's not easy to internalize the reality. Until it's no longer so disconcerting -- and it will come around -- just smile and nod once in a while as people do when they're sharing an experience. Or not. Just don't allow a moment's thought that you're some sort of misfit. "Adorable" is your word of the day. Tomorrow, too.

Your questions apply not only to the sleeve procedure. The good news is that you don't have to put yourself through the anguish and doubts you've taken on. You can decide right now not to have surgery. It's that simple and freeing. In fact you can choose not to lose weight by any method. Even simpler and more freeing. No matter how one chooses to lose weight, a lifetime commitment is necessary for lifelong success. The greatest obstacles are emotional, not habits. If chewing mindfully and thoroughly is "unnatural," then the converse must be true. To eat "naturally" is to bolt food mindlessly à la the wolves. People have the capacity to develop new habits by repetition. Eating in the ways that suit surgery can become the norm when you desire. It's like learning arithmetic. We eventually rely less on our fingers for counting. "Large amounts of time and energy" for planning meals? You really won't have to pass up other activities to have time for all that ponderous planning. As feeble an excuse "I have to wash my hair" was in the olden days, "I have to plan my meals" has less credibility. I'd be dishonest if I were to say that making changes is a snap, but it's nowhere near what you're telling yourself. It's okay to be ambivalent and fearful of making the commitment to yourself, but don't do yourself the disservice of being dishonest with yourself. It might help you to make a decision if, instead of listing the negatives, you begin a written list of reasons that you do want to lose weight. Keep each reason brief and narrow and number them as you go along. Pick up the notebook over the next days and weeks to add reasons as they occur to you. No reason is silly or shallow. They're all about what you want for yourself. Wanting to wear size 6 knickers is as valid as wanting to be rid of backache or signs of diabetes. As an example of focused reasons, "To wear the blue dress that's been hanging in the closet these past four years." To write "To wear the things that got too small" limits the number of items on the list. Name each separately if that's the case. If you're feeling that you're jumping in to something that you're not ready for, give yourself more time. You want walking into the operating room to be a positive experience, not a trip to the guillotine. You're ahead of the game in knowing that behavior changes are necessary, but don't blow them into impossible tasks. You may very well run into rough spots and feel resentful from time to time after the fact. That's what the therapist, BP and your surgery practice's support group are for. We each have to do our own work, but there are others to do it with.

@@Alex Brecher, I just noticed something that may change things. I have a lengthy list of "ignore" people only because, long ago, I did a wholesale blocking out of all "Signatures." I can't even recall how/where I accomplished it. Now there are some individuals I want to see nothing or as little of as possible. When I click any of the other elements (posts, chats, etc.) alongside their names on my Ignore list, I get that error message about security key. When I enter one of the screen names in the bar at the bottom of the Ignore screen and click the elements to make them disappear, I get a message that the individual is already on my ignore list, as though I can't extend the ignore instructions beyond the Signature. What can we do to remedy this?

The first step always is to consider the source.

It may not happen for everyone who develops dilation, but the ballooning can occur just above and below the band simultaneously. There it was on my images.

It's common for low thyroid to impede weight loss or cause weight gain, but it doesn't necessarily work that way. Have you been working with an endocrinologist? Has your dosage been switched around for four months at a time? My doctor told me it takes about that long to know the result of a change. After nearly 30 years taking synthroid or L-thyroxine, my numbers went wildly cuckoo a few years ago. My primary referred me to an endocrinologist who changed my dose a couple of times. I've been in the normal range for a decent time now and see him every four months for blood work. We're still tweaking slightly. It's a good thing I like the endocrinologist greatly and we have good conversations about all sorts of things. Otherwise I'd resent having to go in that often. I hope you get to a good place. It seems unreasonable to me that your medical plan might deny you for the reason you mention, especially since your doctors will submit letters in support.

When you lose fat, hence, weight, you lose it everywhere.

@@Alex Brecher, that's pretty much what I've been doing. Whether I click on "Hello WLS...," or the little bust in a circle to its left or the little gear to its right, I get the same dropdown menu. The three visuals are one click-upon. Is that as it should be? I clicked "Manage Ignore Preferences" and "Remove" yet again and got the same 'error -- Your security key is no good' message. Same when I click "Show" under the Posts column; I expect that should turn off "Show?"

Especially the ones sitting forward.

What you've worked for and what you've given here came back to you multiplied. You really, truly are a heroine.

I'm here only under the aegis of my laptop (windows 7 with firefox), never anything else. No app-y stuff for me. This link is to the message I get when I click on any of the Ignore options. I tried to copy/paste yesterday, but it wasn't happening: www.bariatricpal.com/index.php?app=core&module=usercp&tab=core&area=removeIgnoredUser&authKey Any ideas for a solution? _______________________________________________ Shoot, even the link doesn't work. Here's the message: "Your secure key, used to verify your identify, did not match the one submitted. Please go back, reload the form, and try again." This bracketed number appears alongside the message: [#1021523.3] It's Greek to me. I switched over to IE, which I hadn't used in years, with the same, fruitless result.

@@Alex Brecher, thanks, but the "chats" link isn't working for me. I get a "website is offline - error 502 -- bad gateway" message. (Same or the other link you gave.) Further, my 'Ignore' Preferences click-upons don't work. When I click "show" to unshow and "remove" to remove, I'm told that my "secure key" doesn't match my identifier or something like that.

That's about it. When I saw the scene, I wondered whether men do that, as I've never heard it discussed. It seemed that it could turn into an interesting discussion, perhaps going in a few directions. I seem to be alone there. As to the other, that's part way between your funnybones side and your gut response, right? My impulse-wish goes beyond judging in such case, but violence makes me actively ill. I can't guess how volcanically ill I'd be from violence at my own hand.

To those stuck on penis size, that's your topic, not mine.

My band has been loosened due to dilation. As I recall, we waited about two months to begin to refill and I was fine thereafter. People have different experiences. You don't have power over the outcome, but you do have power over being scared now. It seems premature to me. You might prefer to see how it plays out for you.

@@OKCPirate -- I thought I'd included the time marker and have edited the OP. For you, it's about 6:45. 'll have you and *@BigViffer know that a size competition is of no Earthly interest to me. I certainly hope my interests don't run to mindlessness. No, it's about self-image, feeling comfortable in one's own skin and knowing one's self. P.S. Betty White can get away with anything. It's the sweet voice and the dimples. She rocks. P.P.S How is it that you post something about the antediluvian, seen-too-many-1940's-movies notion of women going to the loo in committees and the women respond with seriousness? Perhaps I shouldn't have expected better, as I omitted a marker to the scene in the TV show. You've got it now. You're on!

That is the sweetest thing. I've done it a few times and felt like a sucker each time. Since you asked about vethood, you may have noticed that [some] vets now and then grouse about people asking the same questions when, were they to take a quick peek around, they'd find the answers given to earlier repetitions of the same, same, same. When you find that you can't send them on their way with a "Bless your heart," ...You know you're a vet, you're a vet all the way from your first cigarette to you last dying day.... Don't quote me.

I don't think it's so formal as to have a calendar or a definition. It seems to me it's a matter of having reached goal and maintained for a time. The time would be up to the beholder. Another way to look at it is that you've been at BP long enough to roll your eyes at some of the repetition.

@@Cape Crooner, I am saddened that my batter didn't set to your liking. Your story becomes increasingly 'layered' and way beyond my ken. May your solution to the quatrilemma give you peace.

Funnybones, OKCP. You're correct, though, about being omitted from the BBQ list. That would be the rub. A dry rub. Uh-oh, I think we're hijacking Cape Crooner's topic. I hope he's a BBQ fan.

I say "easy," you say "simple." Not the same by a long shot. We're both correct in our warped little ways..

@@devillynn, you have my deepest sympathies. I can offer only what the others have. Please join a support group and see a therapist and/or grief counselor. You've experienced the unspeakable and can only benefit by sharing with others. In sharing you'll be giving, too. Having an individual setting can only help, too.