WLSResources/ClothingExch

@@Djmohr -- I have no experience to share, but I have heard only that you want a surgeon who has plenty of experience with reconstructive surgery for people who've lost oodles of weight. This stuff truly is reconstructive far more than plastic/cosmetic. @@AvaFern -- The last I've seen on people who've had brachioplasty were incisions that actually were "V's" and the length depended on how much of the arm an individual wanted taken in. I can't tell from your description whether the procedure has been changed so that the incision no longer is a "V?" Would love to know what the latest is.

There's no reason not to explore surgery. Lots of people have surgery at 60 and later. Unless a maple tree or a statue of Dylan Thomas falls on you before Thursday, you've got plenty of time to enjoy better health and dance the night away. Two years or 40, it's all the same: Living.

Any number of things can motivate her comments about surgery. I won't speculate or analyze the woman you're talking about. It's your own expectations that caught my attention, as you're the one who's here. Bits of background are missing from your account. Writing that you "know someone" doesn't sound as though she's one of your nearest and dearest. If she were, it would be reasonable to think she'd be on your "team." In such case, let her know that you're disappointed, but allow that she may feel disappointed in herself. If she's not an intimate, she has no reason to shake her pompoms. I think that you're feeling "crushed" may be more about you, not she. I say generally that keeping reasonable expectations is the way to go. Count on the close people. If I'm laboring under the wrong impression, ignore all the above. No matter what, you have exciting things ahead. Enjoy every moment.

Every bozo you've ever encountered who wasn't your family was family to someone. Being family doesn't preclude stupidity, obliviousness, self-loathing and fear. Your relative just happens to have cornered the market on all of them. The comments to you have no bearing on your life, never mind your work and success. Good for you for speaking up. Your confidence and groove are yours. Screw the fools.

Opinion, no advice. Never heard of 'it works.' It sounds like the line after "But wait! Order now and get a second bottle free." A fat inhibitor. What would P.T. Barnum say? In the olden days, people who had lapbands ate properly. Most exercised, too. They lost weight. Dopey people.

Yes, I've been to NJ. I've been there many a time on my way to somewhere. C'mon, you know my point is the incongruity of a state highway decorating itself with plastic flowers in "The Garden State." It could be worse: It could be the Garden State Parkway that's festooned with artificial flowers. Honestly, I worked as a day camp counselor in a long-defunct resort hotel in West Orange for a couple of years during college. Some relative and close family friends ran away to NJ. I spent many a weekend during college in New Brunswick. Went to a wedding in Jersey City two years ago; the ceremony was held on a terrace overlooking the river with a view of the New York skyline. My friend of longest duration and others live in NJ. Always got a kick out of the Weehawken Library when taking that large circle from the Lincoln Tunnel. Much more. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jofNR_WkoCE

JUST CALL THE PRACTICE'S OFFICE AND VERIFY INSURANCE APPROVAL. Until you hear it from them, you don't know anything.

Now you all can stop wondering why NYC looks upon NJ as a daft neighbor that should move farther off. NJ calls itself "The Garden State." The toll booths on one of its two major highways, the NJ Turnpike, are [or were] decorated with potted, plastic flowers. Says it all. @@Sophie74656, Wooo-oooo-ooo.

NO, No, no, no ball-growing. Better to be eggsy. Diminished appetite and quicker satiety are what it's about.

I'm considering it and wonder if anyone is, too, or has committed.

@@audaciousmarie http://www.obesityaction.org/ Obesity Action Coalition's annual convention, "Your Weight Matters," is a three-day event. This year's is at the end of August in D.C. I'm giving you the organization's link rather than only the convention so that you can explore and learn about regional or local events that are held now and then.

Whoa, you're going to spin yourself into a tizzy. - If you pace your liquid intake, it's unlikely that you'll get dehydrated. If you do, there are simple ways to correct it. - Sick how? The common cold? Mumps? Vomiting? If and when it happens, there will be a way. - If you follow your practice's guidelines, you won't screw something up. If you're unclear on an instruction, clarify before you go on to that step. - Instead of asking "What if I fail?," ask "What if I succeed?" The possible answers are endless and tantalizing. Risk it. - Don't be silly. You are the only person who's ever asked these questions. You truly are unique in the world. - Yup, keep yourself occupied. Spread out buying your post-surgery supplies so that you have something to do each of the next eight days. Same with other preparations. My most sage recommendation is to change the sheets on the morning of the 30th, just before you head to the hospital. It will occupy you for a few minutes and you'll have a fresh, crisp bed when you get home. Okay?

@@glitterdaisies, it doesn't sound to me that your therapist is opposed to bariatric surgery, but is concerned that you learn to overcome the emotional eating you've described. Surgery isn't a 'cure' for it. Our own strategies and understanding what makes us tick are what matter. Jargon comes and goes. Don't get hung up on labels. Eating that causes weight gain and/or impedes weight loss is important to tackle. Whether it's a "disorder" or no, so what? Your best bet would be to ask the therapist what she had in mind.

Honestly, it doesn't sound good at all. It is understandable, though, given your sister's experience and the abundance of exams you go in for. Saying something dopey like "Chin up" is, well, dopey, so I'll say "Rant and rave your ass off any time."

@@lisacaron, thanks. I'd like to hear about it.

You're wailing like a banshee over two weeks out of a lifetime. If you believe that you can't stick to liquids for all of two weeks, are you capable of changing your eating habits and food choices for a lifetime? You're the one who has your pre-surgery instructions in hand. If lists of "'light' foods" are included, fine, go for 'em. If not and someone responds that he was permitted yogurt or other items, you can choose to follow your instructions or change surgeons. Bariatric surgery requires adult thinking and behavior. You're the one who must make the determination.

First off, you can cancel the Thursday appointment right now. You can choose not to see the surgeon as you can choose not to have surgery. You have that freedom. Consider yourself unburdened. Now answer the questions, "What do I want to do?" and "What do I most want for my life?" I hope that helps you focus. You may well have named the jitters-maker -- that leaving the appointment with a date means that surgery is real rather than something off in the haze. You are the one who must make the decision. Yes, you'll have to make significant changes in your daily life to succeed for the long haul. It's a trade-off. If you believe that you'll be better off for making the trade, there's your answer. This American Life and Ira Glass are over rated. Nietzsche's the one. Just kidding, but not about TAL or Glass.

Silly me. Here I've been thinking that this website is a bastion of pulchritude.

@@jintycb, don't be silly. Partner dropped you on your head a few too many times? Beside, everyone knows that dancers don't fart. Ever.

@@beccaconaty87, your anxiety level is a greater danger to you than is bariatric surgery and I'm not even speaking of mortality. If you want to obsess over statistics, here, in all seriousness, is a good one: If 32 people are in a room, two will have the same birthday -- month and day. Test it next time you're in a crowded room.

Really good. Mention of "motivational speaker" usually makes my eyes roll, but this one makes wise, not hokey, observations. All things are possible and, even if not all come to fruition, the effort is the reward. The parade of well-turned men doesn't hurt. Thanks, @@NikkiRT

@@lisacaron, thanks. I won't be going after all. Somehow I got my mental calendar mixed up, thinking that a family wedding was scheduledfor Labor Day weekend. A relative reminded me that it's that last weekend of August. My doubts as to whether I was truly keen on being immersed were lingering as well. I hope that you and your husband find the experience worthwhile.

I don't see a "Guys Only" here, so here I am. Why can't it be both? Vanity and shallowness in service of health and safety. You've worked for it and you've learned. I'm all for it. Proper form when working out is important. Lots of folks need the demonstration. Do it with annotations.

Take your meds, girl. No more episodes of pointless, wasted sex.

@@Chez2812, if you had surgery on the Tasmanian side of the Equator, there's your answer. Seriously, not all incisions are equal. Three inches does seem quite a bit, so you may want to ask next time you see your surgeon. Considering your goals and history, though, don't let the size become unnecessarily important. Over time it will fade and become less noticeable. My port incision, on the right, seems now to be about one and one-half, but, if I recall, appeared to be two inches and perhaps as long as two and one-half. Surgical techniques vary. Some people have fewer than five incisions. Some surgeons do single-incision (inside the navel) procedures. At least, it was being done when I had surgery. Best wishes as you for forward.