NewgirlfromMd

Hi! I am having surgery March 19th yikes! There was a little confusion so I don't know if I am having the sleeve or bypass. I find out Monday at my pre op appointment with my surgeon. I want to have bypass because at 357lbs and 5'5 I have a lot to lose. My doctor my want me to have the sleeve because I have a strong family history of colon cancer and I am 32 but I have started prescreening early. That is what we will have to sort out! I am prepared for either but it is nerve racking not knowing right now! This is very strange for me to share about myself but I haven't felt comfortable talking to friends & family and I can see the value of talking to people going through the same things. For many years loved ones who meant well tried to encourage me to look into weight loss surgery. I fought the idea hard, even with PCOS making it harder I needed to try. I always felt like I could lose the weight on my own before it became harmful to me. I was wrong. I have done every diet out there, some very expensive and extreme. I have had a gym membership for years & went! I have had some success but I Would always hit a wall, get discouraged, then try something new. Finally after 18 months of working with a personal trainer I hurt my back. Went to the doctor, he said sciatica & bursitis in my hip. I did PT of course with little change. A year later I am in chronic pain & I gained back every pound I worked so hard to lose. I saw a pain management doctor for shots so I could get my life back & she told me I was too heavy for shots and sHould consider surgery. My primary agreed. I finally decided to consider it and I realized a lot of things that I thought I knew about weight lose surgery were not true. That was 8 months ago and here I am doing my liver shrinking diet with surgery right around the corner! This was a major decision & my husband wasn't on board in the begining because he was worried about me having surgery of any kind. Just normal fears, but he is loving & supportive. It has been hard to talk to my kids about this, especially my 6 year old. My main motivation to lose the weight is definitely my health, I want to avoid the many Illnesses & diseases that comes with obesity, I want to be rid of the pain that has changed my life so much for over a year now, and lastly I am starting to hope for something more. I haven't been at a healthy weight as an adult & although I have a blessed life I can't say I like the way look or feel in my body. Never have. I don't want to stand out, I don't want to Modify my life to my size anymore. I am hopeful that I will be enjoying life a lot more soon 😃