renman23

Harley, this is only about ONE PERSON! YOU Look in the mirror and ask that guy. Are you healthy? Are you Happy??? If your answer is no to either..... Find an answer. It MAY be this surgery, it may be something else. But life is too short to no get those 2 things RESOLVED! Good luck!

Before this surgery, i wanted to try a BMW M5... but couldnt drive it.... had to sit in the passenger seat while the sales guy drove... by next summer.... It's MINE!!!

Protein shakes gave me the runs.... Real BAD..... I spent about 2 weeks on sugar free popscicles and Water.....

This surgery is about reclaiming YOUR LIFE. Your health, Your confidence, YOUR happiness. If sharing that w/ your significant other is important to you, then you will do that. If your health, confidence and happiness is important to your partner, then they will share that as well. But sometimes, its' not. and that's ok as well.

I am 6 days PRE surgery but i have talked with BOTH my Therapists (Personal and program) and BOTH told me to anticipate this. It's about your RELATIONSHIP w/ food. The feeling of Satiety is not just about fullness. Is about FEELING satisfied. That is an emotional feeling, not a physical one. Think about the first bite of your favorite food, and the warm feeling it gives you. That aint physical. Its' mental and emotional. So for real success, for many of us. It's about changing your relationship to food. You may not WANT to get that SATISFIED feeling from food anymore because that path leads to where we were when we chose surgery. It's a mental/emotional battle that CAN be won. find new ways to fill those needs...

Before i comment... let me say that i mean in NO WAY to be harsh or condemnatory... only real.. 2. things. 1: If you are 120 pounds over your goal weight @ 21.... its not going to get better from here unless you make MAJOR changes... NOW is the time to get your weight and eating habits under control. 2: there are SOOOOOO many ways to have fun! Leading an ACTIVE life... So you wont CHOOSE to go out drinking w/ those friends.. at least as much as you did ... You'll find new, healthy ways to have fun... AND when you have the physical body that you like... and the CONFIDENCE that goes with it.... WOW. I'd suggest following a few ladies who are fitness related on IG or FB to INSPIRE you.... You may be surprised... I hope you choose to continue w/ you path... the HEALTHY choice is soooo much better!

Mike, You have only one body and one life. Both of them are EXCLUSIVELY YOURS. YOU need to feel good. So only YOU can decide. I was against having this done for years until i just woke up one day and decided that i was TIRED of losing ground and wasting my life. I'm less than 20 days away and i CANT WAIT! I know its going to be hard. I know i'm going to have issues. I KNOW i have a long way to go. But I'll get there and the REWARDS will be SWEET!

Maybe it's not about YOU.... Maybe its a forum for MEN to feel comfortable discussing sensitive issues amongst themselves. We cant see the Original posts because they've been edited for mixed company. No offense intended

I have 2 things to say. 1 about your surgery and 2 about your husbands comments. 1: You CAN do this. This may be a good time to re-build your support network. Family, Friends, co-workers, neighbors anyone... those who love you will support you. and even if its just a few... or just you. YOU CAN DO THIS. 2. My favorite Quote from Maya Angelou is this: “When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”― Maya Angelou We tell who we are mostly by what we DO. Your husband may be scared...but what he said was extremely selfish and hurtful. He may be afraid you'll leave him. You will be more attractive and have MANY more options.. he may be afraid that you'll find someone better... and truth be told. he may be right. but what he really did was tell you WHO he is. Listen to him and as you grow healthier, and stronger. And your outer visage begins to more accurately reflect your inner person... he will either get better, as a man, a father and husband.... OR life will present you with OPTIONS! GOOD LUCK!!!

I'm new here so, i'll take it slow. HOWEVER... Life is short. One of the positives of this type of decision is to re-embrace LIFE AND LIVING. Sex is an important part of life and i can tell that you want to share that with your wife. but if she wont then you need to consider. for yourself , putting ALL options on the table. Do you REALLY want to go the rest of your life without SEX? Without the intimacy that it can have? Dont just ASSUME that you should stay with her. dont just assume that some magical day it will get better. you only have so many days left, you need to make the most of them. Do what you can to make your marriage work, but remember that YOUR needs are important! If she wont help fill those needs....

One more thing... Once upon a time i was a Clothes horse... There's this shop in Phila. BOYDS...they have the best stuff there... and i used to shop there... Suits, Ties socks sweaters.... then one day... I remember it like yesterday. I go to the 3rd floor to browse the European collection... and a sales person approaches me... he sys sir let me take your measurement... Then sys.. "I'm sorry sir.. your size is on the 4th floor" I reply.. "but the fourth floor is for Big and Ta......" I havent bought a really NICE suit since.... when i reach my goal... I'm going to the 3rd FLOOR!!! Im buying an Emenegildo Zegna suit.... Ant its going to be glorious!!! LOL

Thanks so much for this thread...I thought it was just me!!! Booths at a restaurant.. Airline seats Long walks... bike rides... GOLF... I promised myself i'd learn I have been wanting to take a paragliding lesson... This is my year... and SEX... DEAR GOD SEX!!!!

Take their "hate" and cherish it. You earned it! You did the work. You made the sacrifice you EARNED the rewards. Remember.... "Everyone pities the weak.... Jealousy you have to EARN"