LosingSomeLisa

Like so many, I have struggled with weight and healthy body image my whole life. I was not an obese child, and my parents are fit and health conscious. I grew up in Orange County, CA, and I really think it's hard for an adolescent to find a truly healthy body perspective there. I wasn't heavy AT ALL in high school (I'm 5' 9" and weighed about 130) but I wasn't as skinny as I wanted to be back then. Anyway, I think weight really became an issue for me when I was sent to an all girls boarding school at a 16 year old, where food was used as reward and punishment.

From that time on, I fluctuated at least 30 lbs. off and on every year, until my weight slowly began to creep up. In 2002 after the birth of my fourth child I was 200lbs, so  I became a Jazzercise instructor, personal trainer and Pilates instructor. I was finally in control of my weight, my health and my habits, and thought it was the beginning of a life long change. And it was, really, for about six years. I maintained a healthy 160 - 165 pounds and a 23 BMI and really awesome commitment to fitness and encouraging other women to reach the same goals. Then personal tragedy entered my life, and everything changed -- my job, my quality of life, my standing in the community, my mental health (depression began to present very real and crippling symptoms), etc. for the past 7 years I've been a constant yo-yo of success and relapse into unhealthy habits...each time worse than before.

When my healthy, fit, trim mother had a heart attach at age 59 I knew I needed to take more drastic and permanent measures. I was 267 lbs. when I started this journey at age 44, and I'm so excited to get control of my body, my habits and my life....forever this time. With the help of this pending surgery, support and counseling I have no reason not to believe in success!