donald0717

I was sleeved on April 23rd and have lost 45 pounds since surgery. Overall I've lost 70 pounds since I started my pre-op classes and dieting. I never thought it would be possible to lose this much weight, this fast. But it comes at a cost. I had thought I was totally prepared for this journey. That my mindset was in place. But I am still having to relearn my thinking and my actions. There have been few days when I haven't eaten too much. The first week being on the liquid diet was easy to not get a sore stomach. But starting the second week of full liquids it became harder. It's become downright impossible since I started soft foods last Thursday. I have excellent support at home, (Maybe too good, as I find myself resenting being told what I should be doing) so that isn't a problem. I find myself regretting that I ever did this at times. So I'm going to start seeing my therapist again, maybe with his help I can get a handle on my emotions and stop being such an ass to those who love me and only want to help me. Time to start loving myself, and caring for myself again! I thought I was prepared to do that before surgery, but I guess I still need some help. Oh yeah, everything went great with the surgery!!! And I've got an appointment to see the therapist tomorrow! Thanks!!!

Weighed myself this morning for the first time in about 3 weeks. My goal was to lose 20 pounds pre-op. I've lost 25!!! I'm not looking forward to tomorrow, going without food or taste for 24 hours will be very hard. But I expect that if I can get through this part of the journey I will most likely come to view any other part of the journey as going downhill. To all of my "April 23rd" siblings out there... God Bless and Good Luck!

I was told that were ok but I would to need an Iron and possibly Vitamin D supplement to go along with them.

I agree with LaLa Lady. But in addition I would remind your mother that doing this is a decision that you are making to positively affect the outcome of all of your lives. After following through on this decision you will be around longer, and will you not place your parents in the position of having to care for your daughter because of the future heath problems you WILL experience if you don't change your behaviors. BTW... I get sleeved on the 23rd well. Good luck and God Bless

Tomorrow is the start of my liver shrinking diet. Somewhere I keep hearing this voice in the back of my head saying, "Go for it today, it's your last chance!" Has anyone else experienced this and what did you do about it? In my mind I've already planned out the menus and everything. Any last suggestions?

I'll start off by sharing that my surgery is scheduled for 4/23, and I started my LSD yesterday. I'm excited, confident, and anxious all at the same time. Does that make sense? Anyway... While I've always known that I eat more at certain times, today it's so evident how much I eat in order to stuff one particular emotion. Yesterday I had a fairly good day considering it was the first day of my LSD. But today, I got into a fight with my roommate and all I want to do is stuff my face. The urge to eat is so friggin strong! So I'm sitting here thinking... "I have lots of Percocet's and I can take those and fall asleep until diner." Now tell me, how screwed up is that? (more self disclosure... I'm a recovering addict.) Right now I'm just climbing up a wall. What really pisses me off is the person I'm angry at has decided to run and hide for the day and I can't confront them. I'm a mess right now and could use some words of encouragement.

LipstickLady: I totally get where you're coming from. I've been "dieting" for at least the past 8 weeks and have lost 15 pounds. I haven't done the whole liver shrinking diet, but I've practicing how I will have to eat in the future. Eating with a smaller plate and a baby spoon, chewing everything fully, taking more than 30 seconds between bites, things life that. (An added benefit is that my shirts are cleaner. It's just that I'm hitting the wall now and I wanted to taste some of those things that I won't be able to have for the next 3-4 months or more. So far I've avoided doing so today but I really want a Philly cheese Steak before I go out in flames. Last night I went to two separate Walgreen's to buy them out of their Boost Glucose Control, (I could have made it in one trip but I really don't like chocolate and they didn't have enough very vanilla or strawberry to last me through the next 2 weeks. So now I'm all set!!! I have all of my dinners, lunches and breakfasts to last me through the pre-op diet phase. What I need to do next is order my high Protein bullions so that I'm ready for my post-op liquid diet phase. I'll be getting this through Bariatric Choice. But to be honest, just being able to read these posts and write a little, help take the time away rom eating. So I guess I'll be doing more of that over the upcoming months. Thanks for being here.

Hi there, you're my twin!!! I'm having surgery on the 23rd and start my liver shrinking diet on the 9th. Like you I started dieting about 8-9 weeks ago and have lost 15 pounds already. My goal is to have lost 20 pounds by the time I have surgery. Also like you I have a VERY good support system but there are still those who doubt my efforts, the process, the success rates, you name it, they have their reasons. Some have even suggested that I talk with people who were not successful with their surgeries. I look at this and think... "isn't that like talking to a drunk who has failed to get sober and using HIS reasoning to justify keeping on with drinking?" So I have chosen to continue seeking the support of those who do love and care for me and to find additional support in reading of the success of others on this site. Keep on thinking positively and all will work out. I would love to keep in touch with you and see how you make it through this diet. Private message me anytime you want.

I'm wondering what insurance you have. You wouldn't be able to have surgery with a BMI that low if you were with Kaiser. Just saying. Wish you luck with whatever you decide.

Try Boost Low Glucose. They have 16 protein and 110? calories. They are also non dairy.

I've been so confident that this WLS is what I wanted. I so sure that I want a change in life. I want my life to continue. I want to see my grandchildren and my future children. I want to grow old with my wife. I want. I want. I want. I honestly believe that this is the only thing that will get me these things. Then as I was reading some posts, I came across a post where someone needed to have his heart restarted twice while in surgery. For the first time my faith in the process has been shaken. I've read all the horror stories about complications but none of them have shaken me like this one. There is possibility, however small it might be, that I could die during this surgery!!! Reality check.... there is a balance somewhere. I just don't know where it is right now. Please help!

This was just a moment of temporary panic in middle of the night that I needed to get out. After talking things through it with my wife in this morning everything became more clear. This IS the direction that I have chosen and will follow. I got good news today. The financial people at Kaiser informed that %100 of my surgery will be covered! Thank God for Kaiser and Medicare. Thank you all for the wonderful responses of hope and encouragement. I'll keep reading and writing as needed. Good luck to all.

I was in a pre surgery class run by Kaiser and I surprised by the number of women that felt they had little or no support from their families. The reverse was true of the men. All of us had major health issues and had the full support of our families. While I have some pretty major health issues I sure do look forward to looking good again! BTW, I have excellent support from my wife and children. My daughter has even encouraged me to miss her college graduation if a surgery date comes up first.

OMG!!! I love this post. To me having WLS is like giving up a drug. To hell what anybody has to say or think. What's important is that I want to live and if you get in my way, to hell with you!!! For many, worrying about what people think of them is why they eat so much. This is a time to put yourself first and is maybe the first selfish thing you might have done. I say, go ahead and do it!!! Good luck to those who have done it, those in the process of doing it, and to those who will it in the future.

I started out on this forum thinking I would write everyday, but that fell through. So here's where I'm at now. I've completed the insurance mandated pre op classes and then went on to complete the post class psych class. (Yes, I needed to have a psych eval before I even started the classes) Kaiser is very into making sure each person that they accept into the program is prepared and motivated before they operate. During this time I've done the whole fitnesspal thing and logged almost everything I've eaten. I've even been eating with a baby spoon. Pretty much I've been doing everything they've asked. I'm still having a hard time with not drinking while eating but expect that'll take care of itself once I have my surgery and can't fit it all in my stomach. Now all I'm waiting for is the nurse to call me for my surgical consult and pre op physical! I can't wait as I'm very motivated to make this change and want to strike while the fire is burning. I'll get back when I get my surgery date.

Jersey Girl, I'm still pre op and trying to lose as much weight as I can before surgery. I am still trying to wrap my head around how I'm going to do this and what obstacles I might foresee or have come across. There is so much information that needs to be processed as I discover what my habits and triggers are. I don't think that I'll always have to live my life this way just as I didn't have to stop taking communion wine after I got sober, or reject everyone that smelled like smoke after I stopped smoking. But there are changes that I need to make in the way I respond to the world around me if I am to make this work.

I really had to work on doing this today. It would be so easy to have blown off journaling. But that would probably led to me taking other shortcuts. Yesterday I started to ride but ended up getting off the bike after only 2 minutes. Way too much knee pain to any further. Today is another day and I will try to do it again. The good thing is that I am not beating myself up over this. My wife and I talked about joining a gym. This would allow me get a cardio workout using my upper body and also work on my strength training which I really don't have the tools to do here at home. I think I'll do that the week after next. I would do it sooner but my daughter and grandchildren are visiting next week. Thanks for the feedback on eating out, it really helped to put some things into perspective. It was decided that we would go out for a movie, followed by coffee and desert. Non sweetened apple pie with no ice cream for me. Just typing that makes it sound horrific! But I'll survive, and maybe even learn to enjoy it given time. Thanks for being here and giving me a forum to unload. I know I can do this. I've come too far with other addictions to let this one stand in the way of having a healthy life. I guess that's part of the process. Realizing that maybe it is an addiction? I've blamed so many other things... meds or my genetics, You name it, I'm starting to realize that this is an addiction and I need to deal with it as such, spiritually. Surgery is just the beginning, I will need to change other aspects of how I think and behave. Just looking at the black and white thinking process that I am experiencing is telling me that this is so. I should listen myself and treat it as such. I pray that I can have a successful outcome in this journey.

Had a another good day for the most part, Met my food goals and most of my exercise goals. Was able to increase my morning ride to 7 minutes and my evening ride to 3 minutes. Not a world beater but better than when I started. I ran into my first snag in behavioral thinking though. I'm not sure if it's my problem or the problem of others. My wife's birthday is coming up and one of her friends invited us to have dinner at a restaurant that is one of those places that is a gorge feast. I declined and tried to explain that even though this would be pre op, I still wanted to remain true to my diet. This led to a heated discussion about how I needed to realize that I couldn't avoid restaurants forever. I KNOW THAT!!! But they are off limits until I recover from surgery. I guess what I need to help with is if I'm TOO being narrow in my thinking? Am I expecting too much? This is the only way I know I know to do this. All or nothing. Please give me any feedback you can. Still praying that I do this.

All in all yesterday was pretty good. I find that getting used to exercising daily will take some time to get used. Yesterday I was only able to ride the bike for 6 and then 2 minutes before I was forced to stop due to knee pain. But today is another day and will get on the bike again and see what I can do. Things I still need to work on are. Not drinking while I am eating. Getting away from eating in front of the TV. Continued exercise. Stop using caffeine. Things that I am doing well are. I've stopped carbonated beverages. I'm following what I eat through myfitnesspal. I'm starting to exercise. Nothing insightful to add. Just praying that I can follow through with what I've started and having visions of a happy and healthier ME.

One of the things that the class I am taking requires is that I document my journey daily in some way. They of course suggest that I write, but others have video rerecorded what was going on. I've decided to do this. First of all I hate my hand writing and secondly keeping it on my PC allows me to make changes in my history. I want to capture the raw emotion of what I am feeling without being able to process through it at a later date and then altering the history in any way. I think I've made a good start at doing so that in my first entry. Please put up any editing, grammar, or spelling mistakes I might make and PLEASE feel free to respond if you want to. I need your help, rather it be encouragement or criticism. So here it goes. Yesterday I start my first day of real exercise. I used my stationary bike and rode for 6 minutes after Breakfast and lunch. This excited me as I actually followed through to some degree. I had actually planned to start this weeks ago and my plan was to ride for 30 minutes. But I must focus on the small steps. It taken me years to get where I am at, how can I expect to start at anywhere near a medium level on my first day! I think fear of the failure to reach a high level or medium level is what kept me from trying earlier. I need to lose this fear if I am to walk through this journey. As I look back at my past, this has been the reason that I have failed so many diets. This is the reason I've quit almost everything in my life. I am a classic underachiever, if I can't do it perfectly it's not worth doing and I quit. Today I will change that and I will try to meet yesterday's "achievement". I will try to do that 3rd period of exercise after dinner and I will not look at it as a defeat if a should not. Each day I will sets reasonable goals for myself. I will give myself positive message as much as possible. I will forgive myself and try again when I fail. These are things that I had learned to do when I first got sober 33 years ago. How the have I forgotten them! Today is a new day and I pray that I will make the changes that I need to prolong my life.

I've just finished the third week of my pre op classes. The thing that led me this is of course the obvious... I'm obese!!! But, the health and social issues that follow have finally made it too much to bear. I am a 60 year old grandparent who has never gotten on the floor to play with his grandchildren. I suffer from osteoarthritis in both knees which hinder my ability to walk across the room. I have diabetes, COPD, hypertension, high cholesterol, and I'm sick of being sick!!! I don't think I've had lifelong history of weight problems but I can remember being teased for being "fat" as a young child. This changed as I entered high school and started to played sports and then joined the Army. After the military I became an avid backpacker and got into rock climbing. During this time I keep my weight in check without problems. It should be noted that I did suffer from other self esteem problems... I was an addict and I think I used the alcohol and risky activities to mask my low self esteem. If I was great athlete I couldn't be a drunk? Or if I was a drunk... whatever was needed to cover up the real me and what I was feeling. After I got sober I got married for the first time and as things didn't go well I took to eating to cover up what I was feeling. After the end of this marriage I once again took to activity to hide out. I biked up to 200 miles a week, or would go days without eating. People gave me praise for losing weight but didn't know that I was going through my first major depression and couldn't eat or sleep. The bottom line is that I got down to a respectable weight again in a totally inappropriate way. Soon I got married again and things were good. I exercised at a healthy (non manic) way. Life was good and my wife soon gave birth to my first child. It was during this time that the exercise stopped and quit working to be the stay at home parent. Within the next few years I started to exhibit emotion problems and was eventually diagnosed with bipolar disorder. As the psychiatrists piled on the medications I became less active. I developed breathing problems and was placed on oxygen. Talk about a cluster ****, my body totally shut down. Over the next 15 years my health got totally out of control. During that time period I was hospitalized no less than 7 times for emotional and health reasons and no one was willing to identify my psych meds as a major health concern. Finally, 2 years ago I decided to go off of my meds after I start to develop some rather nasty neurological side effects from one of the psych meds. During the ensuing months I started to breath again and was no longer physically depressed. Luckily I now have a psychiatrist who sees that I had been over medicated all these years. Instead of being on a cocktail of meds that promote weight gain I am on only one. (Unfortunately this med promotes weight gain but it's the one that seems to work) It's been like waking up from a dream, there are literally years that I can't remember. My wife and family are happy that I am awake. So this brings me to the next chapter. What am I going to do to prolong the rest of my life. This surgery is the first step! With it I can be not only see what is going on around me but I can participate in it. And with the help of my higher power I hope that all will go right.