drmeow

I hope it's OK that I jump in here, even though I have not yet had WLS or plastic surgery. I was never really overweight until I married, although I'd always struggled a little to maintain reasonable weight. I apparently married someone just like the father who'd ignored me all my life, and when he continued that pattern in our marriage, I began eating to stuff down anger. Our marriage lasted about 22 years - we are still married but have been separate for a year now, at my request. It took me over a year of therapy (which I entered to deal with emotional eating) to get the courage to end my marriage and ask him to leave. I had planned to file for divorce this month (since my state required a year apart before filing) but now I've decided to have WLS, so I'm holding off on filing until I get it done, b/c I'll have to change insurance once the divorce is final. So, I think in many cases (obviously not all) people who overeat in the first place may have problems in their marriage but use food to cover their emotions. Once you start dealing with those emotions fully, without food, it may lead to divorce if the other person is not willing to work on it (mine had no interest in looking at himself or our relationship).

I think I read somewhere that some surgeons avoid higher-risk patients like you b/c they want to keep their statistics good, and if they think you may have difficulty sticking to it, it makes them look bad. I have no idea whether that's true in your case but it does seem like there must be some reason since it's pretty clear that surgery is your best chance at improving everything. If you get a similar reaction from other surgeons, ask them what you can do to make them see things differently. Maybe if you do a strict diet plan like a liquid diet for a certain amount of time and lose a certain amount, they will see you are committed to it. Please don't give up hope. You are doing the right thing in trying to take charge of your health and I hope things go better at the next clinic for you.