OKCPirate

@Raenh https://www.toastmasters.org/ In short Toastmasters is a club to help people become better speakers and leaders. It is a highly supportive environment to practice giving impromptu and prepared speeches. In most cities there are many chapters and various meeting times. If you don't like the vibe at one chapter, try another. It is a nice combination of a self help and support. They do have good materials to help teach you to give better presentations, but for your purposes, just getting more comfortable speaking in supportive environment might be helpful. We did have one member with serious hearing issues, and everyone was very supportive. I appreciated his guts in pushing his limits. And it is much cheaper than getting professional help and might be better because it is in the real world. Just my $.02. Good luck. You are losing weight which will improve your confidence, this might send you in another positive direction.

@ - Your hearing is going to make it more difficult to pick up important social cues. I suffer from a mild form of autism that really makes it hard to read other. Well it did until I really started to study it. And it really took me years to break all the subtle codes, but once I did, it opened many doors. So how do you learn? Start with books (try "The Like Switch" by Jack Schafer). This will make you more aware of your signals and those of others. Then I really started watching good movies. I didn't just watch them for the story, but good actors send very clear but subtle signals. The little gestures, how they touch their hair etc. and the response from the other actor will give you more clues. Then put away the cell phone and watch people in Starbucks, try to guess what the relationship is between people. As you do this, your confidence will grow over time. I'll tell you a little secret, I developed a social phobia for no good reason in my late 30's. I used to be able to give speeches to thousands, and for some dang reason I was breaking into a sweat leading a prayer at church. So I got out of my comfort zone and joined Toastmasters. It worked. After a few months of supportive practice I was back in my old form. I now teach part time as part of my job. I know that might be a real stretch for you, but it is the cheapest therapy you might be able to find. The people are great and most of the presentations are interesting. This may seem like very strange dating advise, but as Einstein said, "solutions very rarely show up at the level that the problem presents itself."

Dang, I'm 53. My GF is also 53. We just spent two hours behaving like a couple of teens. I think I owe the people who came up with WLS a dozen roses. If I am following the statistics correctly, this should not be happening at this point in my life, and believe me, two years ago I would not have come close. But losing the weight, and sticking to the program and making positive health changes is not only giving me a new leash on life, if it is life abundant. (Now I grant you, I am deeply in love with my GF and I have great respect for her, however I am still amazed at my physical change down there and really happy with it).

Logo would not bother me, but I am more interested in the design. I like the one handed types like this https://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/store/product/waveland-18-ounce-autoseal-water-bottle/3244662?skuId=40819884&mcid=AF_CJ___2617611&adpos=1o1&creative=43742641309&device=c&matchtype=&network=g&gclid=CPbfwMXe28cCFZKRHwodItsJOw&AID=11469020&PID=7576810&SID=58287X1476118Xc16a5c1bd23125ddcd52862711aede7b&source=Commission+Junction&utm_source=Skimlinks&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=Bed+Bath+%26+Beyond+Deep+Link

Get your mind and emotions right: https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-First-Aid-Kit-Practical/dp/0976852659 My favorite book recommendation, great way to start the journey.

Do the math and you will figure out that half of the world is below average. WLS people are no different. There is a Bell Curve on intelligence and ability to learn as well as self control. It is not surprising to me that 5-10% of comments are insane. I am actually surprised that these comments are rare enough that it makes so many people on this board stop what they are doing and run to their keyboards. But as far as support groups go, I have been very impressed with this one. I have enjoyed my two years here. I have lurked on others and was not impressed. They were obviously not monitored. I have to give @@Alex Brecher credit for keeping it as sane as it is here.

@@KaiserKid - actually it is really good to get all that worked out in advance. Figure out the worst cases possible, what it takes to minimize the risk. If you can come to grips with everything that could go wrong it makes you stronger and sets you up for long term success. I am not worried about you, it's the polianish people that I'm worried about.

I had liquid Tylenol too, but never needed it. I was given pills (antibiotic and pain meds) and had no problem taking them one day after surgery and the leak test.

Well I guess there is always parts of Chicago or DC...oh wait. Come on, I'm not suggesting Mogadishu most of the drug war in the border has ended. It is like being in any other city of several millions.

Well if it is of any help, my mom went with me to Mexico. She is a retired RN. She made some interesting observations: The big private rooms. She thought they were great, and hadn't seen them since nursing school. Lack of equipment everywhere so fewer surfaces for germs to hang out. They mopped four times a day, again great infection control The constant staff monitoring, she thought it was great to see old school care again instead of people doing endless "CYA" paperwork. In short, we do a bunch of crap in the states because of lawsuits and managed care that are not necessary and in someways bad. My experience was great. I also saw some numbers which showed that the rate of post op infection was lower there for the reasons I mentioned above. I hope your experience was as good as mine.

Much tougher on women than men. (We guys usually can think of ourselves as studs and are not nearly as hard on ourselves as you ladies are on yourselves). Biggest problem is usually anger because you see new superficially from people. You go from invisible to people hitting on you. I won't deny it's hard on ladies. But I have noticed that this passes in a few months as you hit a new normal. Part of it will depend on where you started and how long you have been there. If this is an issue that was acute in High School, it will be really hard. You have time...start working through this book: https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-First-Aid-Kit-Practical/dp/0976852659 It was very helpful to me. Good luck and remember, ultimately this is about changing your health for the good.

@@Babbs you are right on Protein and hair loss...a good hunk of it is hormones...http://www.americanhairloss.org/women_hair_loss/causes_of_hair_loss.asp. And when you are losing fat, those bad boys and girls do all sorts of odd things. All you can do is stick to the program. I lost a great deal of hair during that phase, thankfully it came back when everything stabilized. Only difference...its now kind of wavy, and no one knows why.

Six days out...does that mean you are having surgery in six days? If so what this is doing is shrinking your liver making it easier to get the sleeve done (liver right above stomach). Ketosis (https://www.dietdoctor.com/low-carb/keto) is a quick way to make it happen.

@@gomezk2 - glad there are no leaks (though at this point, that would be not related). I have not needed a dilation post surgery. Keep us posted. Someone might be in the same position someday.

@itzbrittaanyx3- Three weeks after surgery, I had to attend a work formal dinner. I'm seated next to a potential First Lady...and I can't eat. I just worked it out with the banquet staff to get me soup. They were very accommodating. Yes, I wanted the filet, but I knew I had to stick with the program. It was fine. No one noticed. Now, in your case, this MIGHT be a clue to some emotional eating issues. Worth discussing with yourself. Is food=family good times? Are there other issues related to this? Your first month is an emotional adjustment. It is a gift to relook at the behaviors that got you to the point of WLS. At this point you are the "pig." (The joke is at an egg and bacon Breakfast, what's the difference between a chicken and a pig? The chicken contributes to the meal, but the pig is committed). So you are in this and committed at this point. But you are getting conflicted feelings and feeling deprived. This is a signal that something is going on. Your mission, find out what it is. My $.02.

@@BigViffer - mine ties to my iPhone so it makes tracking easier. Might be worth the extra $10 to get that option. But avoid the wrist versions which seem to be very inaccurate.

You need a prescription for air. Sorry. I had my PCP write a script for a bipap machine. These are automatic and don't require the pressure calibration. I bought an open box model online for $200. I also tried several masks until I found one I liked. You can probably work out a rental deal with a local medical supply person to see if you will be compliant. Not everyone does well with these devises.

Yes, tastes great, protein, and very filling.

@@Dub brother, that is GREAT FREAKIN news man. Congrats.

If it is a concern, keep a log. The more specifics you can give your doctor the better. The biggest danger/side effect for WLS people is not getting enough Fluid and having gallstones. I don't pee as much either, but I also sweat a great deal during workouts. While caffeine won't dehydrate you, it does seem to kick in the peeing and poop reflex. You are off it and that might be slowing things down.

I just don't watch any reality TV. My ex did though. Many of the Diners and Dives places are really good. But I'll get something tasty and split it with the GF and have leftovers. What is scary is there was a time when I would have had two.

Biggest side effect? Lost a bunch of weight and kept it off two years. Oh yeah climbed a mountain did a 5k and greatly improved my sex life. Other than that, hasn't changed me at all. I wouldn't even have noticed it except I can split an entre and still have leftovers

I wouldn't even have the conversation with myself until you hit goal. Revisit then

Saw the most idiotic guy on a date tonight. I just wanted to smack the young twit. He thought he was being thoughtful asking his date what she wanted, where to go. He was peppering her with questions, trying to be sensitive to her feelings. What an idiot, bless his heart. Always remember, women use both sides of their brains all the time. This means they are not only wondering what might taste good but how you feel about what she suggests and then she'll start thinking about how her friends will react on where they went yadayada. I'll slap you if you say that's dumb...it is just the way women are wired. That's why they can make everything beautiful when they are feeling safe and inspired. A date is the one time she can relax a little. Make the reservations. Get a baby sitter if you have kids. Just do it. It doesn't have to be extravagant, ubber thoughtful, just take care of everything so she can relax a little. Little things mean everything to her. This does not mean unilaterally clean out the savings account to buy a boat. It means in these little things, just take care of it. It means everything to her just to be able to relax for a few hours every now and then. So take a lesson from "Mr. Sensitive" idiot. Just take care of it. If you don't she will be tired when the evening is done and that kind of defeats the purpose. You want her to be relaxed and energized. (Yeah, wink, wink, woo hoo - trust me) NOTE: If she objects to your decision, its for a reason she can't articulate, don't argue. So plan B's are a good thing to have too. I can't believe it took me almost 50 years to really figure this out, but ever since I have taken this approach in dating, I have observed how the women in my life just relax and can be themselves. Test it out. Look into their eyes. You will see the narrow focus loosen up, their smiles will show in their eyes. The eyes sparkle. I hope you can see that deep joy in their soul. For most women, being taken care of is so different from everything else in their lives they absolutely love it and they have no idea why. Here's why...they finally feel safe and cared for. Occasionally be extravagant, but 99% of the time, little things mean everything.