Tierra T Tij

My Body Image Issues:

07/20/18 Friday

I am writing this because it seems like no matter how hard I do love myself and have confidence it's like it's hard to believe the words I say and also my old eating disorder/OCD mind tends to take over sometimes and before I know it I'm counting EVERY food that I eat and feeling very fat/freaking out. I'm trying to do my affirmations everyday and fix myself up nice to make myself feel better but it seems like nothing makes me feel better and I go back to either these bad thoughts or I want to self harm to heal myself or randomly yell at people. I get no stress release from my frustrations thus I become even more OCD spend and have other  bad addictions besides OCD'ing on the food I eat like overly exercise until my feet really blister or hurt or over spend on items I think I need to feel a void. I'm tired of putting myself through the ringer but it feels like nothing is never ever enough for me and I'm always searching for answers in the wrong places.