ReneBean

Honey, It sounds like a "no win" situation. If you had told them, they would have freaked out before the surgery - and would probably be finding some other way to torment you for having had it now. Since you told them a half truth, they are just tormenting you a different way. I surely am sorry - but these people sound moderately insane if they still haven't gotten over this. I'm glad your hubby is defending your right to live your own life without asking their permission. If you back down on this issue and do anything to indicate in any way that they are right to be behaving this way - you will never have another moments peace from them again. I would try one more time to explain that: 1) you made a decision that did not involve them and was not their business 2) in order to save them distress and yourself this very reaction, you determined that you would wait until after the surgery to tell about Mexico 3) until they are prepared to apologize for their outbursts and tirades, you will not be willing to listen or speak to them on ANY issues of importance. Make it clear that their reaction to all this is driving a wedge through the middle of the family and that it is senseless to make the children suffer. If that doesn't do it - then give up and go on. There is nothing else you can do. I like the thing about concrete examples of how your "deceitful nature" is rubbing off on the children. If there ARE some, then maybe you need to work with the kids on some stuff - but I bet there aren't any. Good luck. Hugs! Sorry about all this stuff.

I get my first fill on the 21st - and I am very excited about it. I have the VG band - and absolutely no restriction at this point. Any fill would help. I haven't lost any weight to speak of since the surgery - so I really need to get my fill and get this show on the road. *sigh*

I love them - but there is no way I am wearing a shoe with a strap between my toes!! Have a good time, sweetie!! And keep that man on a tight leash. :]

Clang!! Clang! Clang! Claaaang!! Cowbell for ya, Leener. Hugs! You'll be fine. It could be worse - I started my period the day before surgery. Yippee! :]

Hugs Doll! I hope that the custody thing works out for you. I envy you your Lap Band pal... I think that would be great!! Good to see you!

Good. Definitely tell her to get her cutie patootie self back here and hang out with LBT. We miss her!

Hugs Kelly I can see both sides - but I am still newbie enough to vote for keeping the band, drama and all. Even a little restriction is better than none - so maybe you could just keep it a little looser than you have in the past to lessen the drama factor? Just a thought. I hope you feel better soon and can get liquids in. Dehydration is ugly. Huge hugs!

Well, if there was any lingering doubt about my need for a fill, it has vanished. My weight at my one-month follow-up visit was - gasp - the very same as it was on the day of surgery! Uh - yeah. Not so good. Of course, I have been eating everything in sight - so I guess that might explain it...I suppose I just have to do everything back-assward, since it seems that I have last supper syndrome, AFTER the surgery. But, such is life. I have my fill scheduled for the 21st - right after I get back from NY and another follow-up with Doc Fox in Mid-April to see how that whole fill thing is working out. I guess I will just go on as I have been until I get my fill and start all over. The Doc says that I should probably just schedule the 2nd fill for 3 wks after the first one. Maybe I will just sched. for the very same morning I go for the follow-up. Might as well get it all done at once... I am still out of control at work, and so far, the concept of coming in earlier has failed miserably. So, I have been to the gym a few times - but not nearly enough. It seems that DH is flaking out on that, too. He hasn't even harassed me about it in a week. Not good. We both need to go. The only light in the tunnel is that I took my official measurements. An inch here, and inch there - half an inch on an extremity or two. The biggest size difference was the chest measure - apparently, I have lost 3 inches of ugly fat off the rolls on my back. That is awesome. I am still keeping all the floppy bits bound up - which is fine, except that it means sex must be planned in advance. It's hard to feel sexy in a cotton sports bra and a girdle.... and access to all the parts is limited unless I strip down. I guess we are just going to have to schedule that event. Well - I have to get back to the insanity that is my job. Apparently, a file sitting on my desk for more than 2 hours constitutes "backed up". (Even though 24 hour turn time is standard). Well. Such a cheery entry. I am going to have to work on an attitude adjustment. This might assist in the whole weightloss concept.

Well, if there was any lingering doubt about my need for a fill, it has vanished. My weight at my one-month follow-up visit was - gasp - the very same as it was on the day of surgery! Uh - yeah. Not so good. Of course, I have been eating everything in sight - so I guess that might explain it...I suppose I just have to do everything back-assward, since it seems that I have last supper syndrome, AFTER the surgery. But, such is life. I have my fill scheduled for the 21st - right after I get back from NY and another follow-up with Doc Fox in Mid-April to see how that whole fill thing is working out. I guess I will just go on as I have been until I get my fill and start all over. The Doc says that I should probably just schedule the 2nd fill for 3 wks after the first one. Maybe I will just sched. for the very same morning I go for the follow-up. Might as well get it all done at once... I am still out of control at work, and so far, the concept of coming in earlier has failed miserably. So, I have been to the gym a few times - but not nearly enough. It seems that DH is flaking out on that, too. He hasn't even harassed me about it in a week. Not good. We both need to go. The only light in the tunnel is that I took my official measurements. An inch here, and inch there - half an inch on an extremity or two. The biggest size difference was the chest measure - apparently, I have lost 3 inches of ugly fat off the rolls on my back. That is awesome. I am still keeping all the floppy bits bound up - which is fine, except that it means sex must be planned in advance. It's hard to feel sexy in a cotton sports bra and a girdle.... and access to all the parts is limited unless I strip down. I guess we are just going to have to schedule that event. Well - I have to get back to the insanity that is my job. Apparently, a file sitting on my desk for more than 2 hours constitutes "backed up". (Even though 24 hour turn time is standard). Well. Such a cheery entry. I am going to have to work on an attitude adjustment. This might assist in the whole weightloss concept.

Big Hugs. That's all I can offer. I hope you get the final word, soon. Keep Dancing, Vines. We all love you.

Hey Mary; (and all of the other newbies out there) I so can relate to your post... right down to the husband that cooks... to some degree, I guess all of us can relate. That's the beauty of this site. Even though we are miles apart, our experiences bring us to the same place with the same conclusion - something has to be done. This Morbid Obesity business has to be stopped - and right now. I came to this conclusion after I had a little epiphany one day. I have venous stasis - and I was compression wrapping my legs for like the 25th day in a row, and it suddenly hit me... I will have to do this every day for the rest of my life. That really sucks. I am only 40 yrs old, and the rest of my life is a long time... That REALLY sucks. So, if I have this problem at the tender age of 40, what the heck is going to happen to me as I hit 50 or 60? Will I even get that far? EEEEK! So, I started re-searching the RNY procedure and stumbled upon the band. Thank God. I can tell you that I had surgery about a month ago. I am all healed up and I have zero restriction - as I am not scheduled for a fill until after March 20. EVEN eating anything I want to (although more slowly) I have lost a few pounds. This crazy band thing really works. All of my scars are healing nicely - and since I kept them covered for as long as my surgeon would let me, they are fairly flat and not scabbed or very itchy. After only a month, my PCP had to do a double take, cause she just thought I had scratched myself. The port scar, the biggest one, is only about an inch long - and not even very red. I expect that after 5-6 mos, they will be barely noticeable. The smaller scars will probably disappear entirely. I have been going to the gym at least 2-3 times a week - but just for 30-45 minutes of cardio to keep the blood pumping. That is probably the only reason I am losing weight, to be honest - but, I don't think I would be gaining, even if I didn't exercise. I just wouldn't lose. I haven't been scarfing pizza every night - I have been trying not to go insane - but neither have I been on anything that could be called a Diet. So, if you make a minimum effort with the band - you get a minimum result. If you make a bigger effort, you get a bigger result. I hope that you can overcome your emotional state... We all had that "what if" thing going on - but I kept thinking this - I may die on the table, but I could also be hit by a bus on my way home from work. It's worth the risk to have hope of getting control over my eating. It's so worth it. I am happy with my 2-3 pounds - because I know that I can do better than I have done. I am not in any hurry, yet. Another beauty of the band is that it will wait for me to be ready to work - and then it will work with me. Good luck in your decisions!!

Kellie - our own Cosmo Girl!! Woo Hoo!!

I SWEAR - I have had that Trained Twinkie problem before... They're like Termites, man... once they get into your house - you play hell getting rid of them!! Thanks for the Laugh Mikey. I love the Law & Order Fashion Police, too. **I get a gold star for the day. A "Friend" offered me some of the insidious GSC today - and I said "No". My hands only shook a little as I walked away from her desk....

Wow!! The difference is far more than physical. You look good - and you look happier, too. Keep up the great work!! And enjoy your youth. So many of us, here, never really got the chance. hugs!

Hey Folks - we have started a March thread - Come on over!!

Snotty kids - yeah - that's a problem. I hate it when Hollywood makes children's blockbuster films where the kid is a snotty brat - but it all works out for her in the end. Like the Little Mermaid... She defies her father, and manages to get herself into some big trouble. Hans Christian Anderson's version has her paying a price... but not the film. How are kids supposed to think when Ariel can do whatever she wants and get the Prince in the end with no consequences for her bad behavior? What?, just because she is a Princess? What's up with that?!? Oh - and All Y'all might be an Arkansas thing... My MIL used to say that, too. I very much hope that I have never contributed to the feeling of exclusion. I didn't always respond to every post because of time constraints - and just because I hung out here for a very long time before I got banded, so I didn't have the experience or qualifications to comment on true Band related stuff. Lately, I have been away more than I have been here. Since I mostly post from the office, it's just a function of how busy my schedule is. As much as I love All of Y'All - I love it when I am busy at work. Continued employment is good... But I do try to chime in whenever I can. I love the idea that we should all TRY to view everyone elses post thru that, "They Mean the Best Possible Meaning of That" filter. Besides, being just a little narcisistic (sorry if that spelling is wrong) I KNOW that everybody loves ME and would never want to be mean. I certainly love and appreciate all of YOU - and try to accept that every human personality has pro's and con's. I just try to see the good and ignore the bad. It's all a matter of opinion anyway. I mean, some people thing Narcisism is BAD? Ok, fine, whatever. The best thing about LBT has been the ability of it's members to agree to disagree. I know that there are widely varying ideas on every topic - but for the most part, we have managed to not let emotion run away with us. Let's try to remain calm, folks. Truly, if the post distresses you, go on to the next post and try not to judge too harshly. Hugs all round!! :]

Congrats, Wheetsin! Welcome to Bandland!! Hope you are feeling up to snuff soon!! We're all thinking good thoughts for an uneventful surgery and a speedy recovery! :]

Hey Guys Wazzzup?!? Dianne - I hope that rash clears up soon. I beg to differ with your doc. I think it COULD be adhesive reaction. I had that on only 2 of five scars... the other three were just peachy. The rash behind your ear screams allergic reaction - but not to any adhesive. I think you must be allergic to something they gave you for the surgery. I hope it all clears up SOON and you can get on to healing and weight loss. (((HUGS))) Betty - who won? I wish I could go out walking today... It is hot and sticky at my desk, and I know it must be nicer outside than sitting here! Gosh, it has been so long since I thought about that position I interviewed for... my understanding is that after they posted, they had to retract it due to budget constraints. I heard a rumor that I was in line for one of the spots if the budget ever opens up - but right now, it hasn't - and who knows if that rumor is accurate. I just keep on doing my thang... I had my review today, and my immediate supervisor had nice things to say - so apparently my Thang meets expectations... :] Trish, I surely hope you passed that test with flying colors!! Sorry about the Taco thing... I just Jones for those every so often. I don't want to live in a world without tacos... Donna - I am thinking good thoughts for you and your stepson. Definitely get a second and even a third opinion. Someone out there must be able to operate and remove the cluster... Miracles can happen. Maybe it will be in the small percent of cases where they AREN'T malignant. Try to stay positive. I know that must be hard in the face of the other news from your friend. Big Hugs. Keep us posted. Kelly - Bundle up, Darlin... Sorry it's so chilly. We are starting to see signs of Spring around these parts... Yep - RAIN. :] Pat - wow, Pogo sounds like fun - but I so don't need anything else to occupy my time!! If I have an extra minute while I am at the office, I surf LBT. At home, I play Spell Force... or whatever the Game Du Jour may be. Cindy, glad you liked the story. It was just an instant visual. (oh, and you talked like John Wayne, too.) Seriously, everyone should know about gun safety. Well, last night, the Bubble and Squeak was postponed... I got home and DH was not there... which miffed me a little, since we had a gym date. I figured he had just spent the day with his Sis and would be along soon, so I left him a note and went to the gym without him. When I came back from the Gym and he still wasn't there, I got a little concerned. He doesn't do well driving at night - the headlights blind him badly, so he is seldom out late if I am not driving... I went ahead and stopped his download to check phone messages - nothing. I called my office and checked my msgs there - nothing. So, it's 10 pm... and I can't find his sister's phone number. By this time I am experiencing massive fear and guilt - since I had blighthly trotted off to the gym - and CLEARLY he must be dead by the road-side not to have called... uh, yeah. Sure. Apparently, he had called the house and gotten the VM several times and assumed that I was on-line... but never left a message. Same deal with my office - no answer, no message. Anyway, after I finally found the number for his sister, I called over there and he answered. After I mentioned to him, just in passing mind you, that I had thought he was dead, he told me he would be right home... lol! But it was way too late to cook, so we had McDonalds. Yep, late-night nutrition at it's finest. Here is what Google has to say about BUBBLE AND SQUEAK An old English dish, named for the sounds the ingredients make while cooking (or from the sound one's stomach makes after eating it). Some sources say it was originally cold boiled beef and chopped cabbage, others claim it was originally mashed potatoes and cabbage, while some claim it originally contained all three. Today it is typically made from leftover potatoes and cabbage fried together. DH makes it with brussell sprouts and potatoes. The chicken was the modification. It's YUMMY. Grinding those veggies up in the mashed potatoes adds a lot of flavor. Cindy came the closest - so she gets the "points". Hopefully, we will have the B&S tonight... Hugs all round!

Love that Inspiration Factor!! :bounce::whoo::flame::clap2: Great Job!! :clap2: :flame: :whoo: :bounce: :humble::confused: :confused: Keep on Rockin' that Band!!

Old realtor's secret - Bake Cookies or some other comfort food that smells good... Or just dab a spot of vanilla on a lightbulb. If it smells like comfort food - it will sell faster. Another old realtor's secret - and you won't believe this, but it really sells. Paint the garage floor. Men love it because they get the vision of working in the garage. Women love it because it looks clean. Really, invest in a couple of cans of cement paint. And Paula is right about the De-Clutter thing. You want them to be able to envision the home with their stuff in it - not be overwhelmed by yours. Take as many knick-knacks and personal items as you can and box them up. Go for a little Starkness over too much Stuff. Good Luck!!

Hi All!! Donna - Oh, honey. Sorry about that whole PB thing. I haven't tried anything like salad or raw vegetables, yet. Scary! Of course, restriction is a GOOD thing - really, it is. I just wish I had some! I have been able to eat anything and everything... But then, I haven't lost any weight, either. I hope you are feeling better. I love the Mexican food, too. That and Chinese. Love the stir-fry... LOVE it. Dianne - I am so glad that you are all ok. Relax and stuff (oh, and walk! lol). Sorry about the itching. The adhesive on the bandaides left a perfect ring around each incision for me... I get this rash from the glue. YUCK. Sounds like you are having a drug reaction, to me... Hope you get over it soon. Eileen - Thinking good thoughts for Edna...I am so glad she made it through ok. My next visit to Doc Fox is on March 7th. After that, I can get a fill. Of course, the next week, I fly to NY - so I think I will hold off on that fill until after I come back. If I set up my fill for when I get back, then I will have three more weeks before I have to fly out again. I will be in my NY office for the weeks of 3/13 & 4/10 - but I don't know if I will be able to make special arrangements for the extra day - so we will have to do dinner... Betty - Mom's kin were South Dakota Sioux... I don't know if I have any distant cousins on the res or not... Mom is an only child and we never had any dealings with her Mom. (It's a long story). The DH that cooks is both a blessing and a curse... when the food is so good, it's hard to say "no"! I hope you're feeling a little better today. After taking the Platinum Pills, I would hope so! Hope these folks put their money where their mouths are on the fab testing... It's high time you got back to getting paid regularly!! Sherry - the port pain is the last to go... It was well over two weeks before I could roll over in bed without pain... but it does go away, eventually. I am going to have to get one of those ID bracelets... My incisions are healing and it won't be too awfully long until it isn't painfully obvious that I have had bariatric surgery. Patty - what did you watch? I love a good chick-flick! And I am so jealous of the Gnome pajama top!! I want one! The WLS card came in my packet from INAMED. They include one with every band. It just says that you have had surgery and you can only eat small portions. Mine hasn't even made it into my wallet yet - but I guess I had better get it in there. Cindy - Gunslinger with a heart of gold... sounds like a spaghetti western in the making! I am getting the visual: Cindy doing that gun-walk down main street... facing off against a giant slice of pepperoni pizza! Snap to the smoking gun - and then the pizza lying in the dirt, oozing sauce... so was your skating party on ice, or wheels? Anne - at least everyone would be able to tell you and your sis apart if you got siliconized... Personally, I can't get behind the size 2 girl with the big girl boobies - to me it just seems tacky. It isn't one of those things that if a little is good, more is better. lol! A little bit of silicone goes a long way. Congrats on the benign biopsy. That must be a relief! Trish - Pain is bad... I am sure your studies have taught you that pain is your body's way of telling your that something is wrong. Maybe it's something big - maybe it's something small - but you should probably call your doc if you didn't do 1000 sit-ups while someone punched you in the port... My home project - uh, yeah. Hmmm. Uhhh. Ummm. Yeah. 6 mos. That's the ticket! Kelly - Don't forget to breathe!! Gosh you have a lot going on. I hope you were able to make it to the last half of your class. Sounds like you needed a little kicking and screaming... :] (do they yell in Tae Kwon Do?) Pat - POGO? What is Pogo? I guess I probably don't really want to know. I have a hard enough time doing what I should with the games I already play. Well, My Dears... DH is using the leftover roast chicken from last night's dinner to make a modified version of Bubble & Squeak for dinner. Points for you, if you know what that is... MMMMM. Can't wait! Even when I do have a snack in the afternoon, I am still PLENTY hungry at dinner time - and pretty much any time anybody mentions food...or I happen to think of food... well, you get the idea. I can't eat QUITE as much as I did before (we won't talk about how crappy I felt after I got all crazed and ate a third taco...but that might have been more gas than anything) but I can still eat plenty. I am ready for that fill - but the timing of my trip is unfortunate. I have this vision of being incapacitated in Orangeburg... it isn't anywhere I want to be. So, I will just waste another week and eat nice food while I am away. This whole fill thing is so difficult! I know I want to lose weight - but I am SPOILED and I want to be able to eat anything... *sigh*. Anyway, it's off to dinner and another trip to the gym. I hit 23 minutes in my battle with the Evil Eliptical on Saturday. Yee Haw!! My ultimate goal is a good steady 40 minutes without the machine going into Pause mode and without my heart rate kicking over 154... (that is ten beats over the "cardio" rate). Right now, I am working on time. Later, I will work on keeping the machine from pausing while I work out. Well, if I don't get the heck out of Dodge, I won't make it to the gym. Gotta Fly!! Hugs! Irene

Devil De! Where are you? Let Lisa go!! We need her back here.... I mean, DAMN. We haven't had a good sex thread in days! xo

Hey Guys, Another busy day - Thank goodness this month is almost over - and I am sooo looking forward to the weekend. I love coming to here - this thread always gives me a smile or a chuckle. I don't have time for LOTS of stuff - but I will say HI DOC!! My Irish doesn't show much - I look much more like the traces of scandinavian that I have on my father's side - but Mom is Irish/Injun mix - mostly Irish. I love the Big Day - and of course, that I love soda bread goes without saying... :] HI TRISH!! Hey Trish, I never did make it out to Burbank - but I waived when we went to Tucson to visit my, Mom... didja see me? I waived, I swear. It's great to see both of you ladies joining us again. We missed you. My weekend plans are very minimal: 1) no leaving the house except for gym priviledges. 2) get the last of the stuff we got at IKEA put together and in place. I can't recall who said they had a 6 month timeline on any home project - but I swear, I am coming up on that with getting the bookshelves put up and the books put away. It's just so much more fun to play my game or pet a cat, or hang out with the DH. Discipline is something I tend leave at work! *sigh* Well, my dears - I am off to the grocery store and then to home. I have to grab some staples for the weekend and then DH is making Tacos... MMMMM. Homemade salsa, spicy meat and some lovely corn tortillas... (my concession to being banded - corn instead of flour. Oh, yeah. I have the VG band...) I will try to check in over the weekend and do some personals. Hugs All Round!!

TAKE NO PRISONERS!! Kick @$$!! Have fun skiing and keep up the great work!!

Gosh, Jonathan. I guess none of us can really help you because we haven't ever been exactly where you are... Personally, I would not be willing to have to worry about malnutrition for the rest of my life... I know RNY would not be an option for me. I don't know about that Malabsorbtion/Malnutrition element with DS. Sue is the expert - so maybe she will tell us if that is a concern. I guess, if I could have them just switch out the bands in one fell swoop, I would choose that. I would NOT want to go thru yet another surgery to get re-banded, if I could do it all at once. But that's just my 2 cents. I would be willing to risk the potential for having another band removed in the future if it meant that I had the chance to continue losing weight. But that's me, right now, very early in the band game. Whatever you choose - I hope you find peace and success in your decision. HUGS!! and good luck.