bellabloom

I try to be forgiving of myself. I've been through a lot this year and I've also had a lot of relationship experience. I know I'm not going to let this hurt me in any permanent way. My guard is up now. No way am I living with him! I'm spending the night at his house here and there. I think mainly I'm just holding on to see if this get better!

I take birth control that completely stops my periods. I love it!!! And so you will be past all of this. I'm sorry I know it's hard.

I don't love him. He is obnoxious and full of himself and yes a drunk. There is always an excuse to drink. I can see that clearly. I've historically had a hard time extricating myself from relationships. I hold on until things are just miserable. I really like being able to spend the night next to someone. Maybe I just crave the attention. Maybe there is something about the craziness of this guy that makes me feel alive after so long being fat and miserable. Maybe there is a part of me that thinks things will change because we started out so good. I know I've got to end it. It's only a matter of time at this point.

Gotcha. I was really just teasing. I'm super easy going and don't actually get upset at all about what people write on here. It's a free forum.

Nope. It's a movie theater in another town where I live.

I'm still feeling like I shouldn't lose more but a part of me can't let go of wanting to. I'm at goal. Just need to accept it.

Really? Really. So there is no such thing as crazy? No such thing as someone who is just weird and messed up crazy? Well my stepmom always says there is a lid to every pot!!! Sorry but there are crazy men out there and there are plenty of jerks too and since this is my thread I reserve the right to judge, critique, complain, and vent about whomever I please!!! And if you don't like it, I suggest you start a thread entitled "peace love and fuzzy kittens!!!" ???? Hahhahahahha!!! Also you are happily married! So it's easy for you to say as you sit in your cocoon of love and comfort. It's much harder to go through this than one would think and I think we all deserve a vent once in awhile!! I mean really.

My advice to you: Have plenty of photos that are good quality. Clear face shots and full body. I will often pass up a guy if he doesn't have enough photos. Make a profile that describes your basic personality, a few sentences about what you are looking for in a partner. And list a couple specific likes and interests such as favorite song and what is important to you in life. Use specific examples. Email lots of women and make sure and ask questions to keep the conversation going. It's hard to keep up texting without questions back and forth. Follow every answer with a question. As her out on a date quickly- within a couple days. It's always better to meet than text for long periods. Always, always pay on the first date. I cannot tell you what a turnoff it is to me when a guy doesn't do this. In fact I feel guys should pay the majority of the time. It's manly and attractive to do so and a sign of respect. Don't worry about rejection. Date plenty of people at once and know that not everyone is your match, but it only takes one.

So I'm not overreacting that this is crazy? I mean, it's a queen size bed!!! How can he fall on me and almost crack my skull like that!! So not all alcoholics can barely walk when they drink? I've never been around one before.

I do feel like I am worthy of a better man!!! Of course I do. I think I'm awesome!! I just don't like being alone and I haven't met anyone else that has sparked my interest. All the other guys I've met were just so lame. But of course so is the one in supposed to be with!! I'm only now realizing how bad it really is with him.

I would never, ever expose my kids to this. He has only met them once months ago before he started acting this way. And to be honest, I was less than thrilled how he acted towards them. Disinterested, just like he acts towards me on a mental level. So after that I decided not to bring him around again. In fact, I'm not planning on introducing anyone to my kids anytime soon. I'm a protective mother cub when it comes to them, they are a separate part of my life until the truly right man comes along. I have the 50% of the time and it's during my other 50% I date, not when they are with me. I know there is 0 future with the guy. 0 future for me and definitely 0 future with my kids!! I need to drop him. I am realizing I dislike being alone more than I thought.

It's pretty nuts. I can't believe I'm in the situation and how much I am procrastinating ending it!!! Am I that afraid to be alone? What is it with this guy. I just don't know. He is very funny and that's a real attractive trait to me, and he's very affectionate but not in a personal way! Just words, that's all they are. He barely knows me.

Omg. Are you guys ready? Here I go!! 1. Guy shows up and he's nothing like his profile pictures. He's ugly and has a hairy back sticking out of his shirt. His voice is incredibly obnoxious and he spends most of the date talking about Kung fu movies. He talks me into going to sushi with him and I tell him, fine but I'm NOT hungry so I'll just watch you eat. We get there, and turns out he is one of those people that thinks Japanese sushi chefs will understand them better if they speak in a very loud pretend Japanese accent!! "Hewwwwo, we likey sushii yum yum pwease! Arigato!" Omg. The waitresses are rolling their eyes, and I am mortified having lived in Japan and being very aware how ridiculous this is! The ****** bag proceeds to order me a 16 piece of sushi plate and a shrimp head!! Omg. I can't eat it of course but I make myself sick trying because I can't stand to waste food and puke three times in the bathroom and to make it worse the a*****e drinks all my sake!!!! 2. I go out with this super cute guy. On our second date he takes me to a beautiful restaurant, delicious food, pulling out my chair, opening the car door, doing everything right! He is funny and charming and I'm loving it. Until. He gets this crazy look in his eyes and starts telling me with full conviction how he's got friends with special powers that can levitate things with their minds and see the future!!! Aha hahahha. 2. Go out to Breakfast with a guy. He's late but when he shows up he's kinda cute. So we sit down and we are chatting and he tells me about how he was part of a Christian cult for 12 years. ???? But he left it and I'm thinking okay at least he left it. I casually ask about his kids and he launches into everything about his ex wife and how three weeks ago!!!!! He finally had her arrested from their home for domestic abuse and she went to jail. Three weeks ago!!! f**k!!! I want to leave but I stay and damn sure he pays for breakfast. 4. Quick summery- the guy who offered to put his hand up my dress and grab my ass. The guy who showed up wearing lipstick. The gay cowboy. The nutlike guys who have me the entire histories of their alcoholic bulimic abusive ex-wives. The guys who bailed on their kids. The guys with no time at all for dating. The guy who had a compulsive spitting problem. The alcoholic. The guys who made me pay. Ugh. It's a scary world out there!!

What I am looking for is simple- a level headed man with his feet on the ground and a decent job he likes. Not given to extremes, enjoys life and has a good sense of humor. No heavy drinking, no drugs, no heavy religion, basically moderation in life. Emotionally stable and fortitude for life, an optimistic viewpoint. A man who knows how to treat a woman with respect and admiration- open doors ect is a huge plus. I hate being treated like "one of the boys". Someone with time and the inclination to spend it with me. Is this too much to ask?????? I'm a pretty damn good catch and I deserve it!

One of the worst things about being overweight for me was how hot and sweaty I used to get. While working I would drop sweat all over everyone and get totally flushed. I would break a terrible sweat just getting my kids up and to school!! So now, I welcome the cold. Bundle up and welcome it in!!!

Awwwww thank you everyone!!

Hmmmm. How many calories are you eating every day? Do you track them and measure your food?

That's a real bummer!!! I hope you can get a revision.

He's awesome. It gets easier as you get further out. I still have some issues and have to come up with excuses- I say I eat like a bird and they just believe me because I'm so tiny now. I'm always embarrassed at how much I leave on my plate so I ask for half orders or order just a small salad. As far as telling people goes- I couldn't imagine faking in love with someone and them not knowing such a big part of my history. Plus the lose skin is hard to hide! I figure if I'm serious about someone they need to know and I don't want to be with anyone who wouldn't accept it. Obviously if they can't accept it they don't like me enough.

You could set a clothing size goal instead and focus on that.

I felt when I was larger that Macy's woman had the best plus size clothing. Basically copies of the smaller clothing in larger sizes. They have inc and Calvin Klein...

I don't have much loose skin. What I do have is on my tummy area but I've also had 2 kids so I probably would have had that anyway. My butt is kind of dropping, need to build muscle. My legs and arms have a little tiny bit that is barely noticeable. I wouldn't have barely any at all except I've chosen to be very thin and go under goal weight. I'm 5'6 and 121pounds, size 0-2.

Sigh. I'm dating right now and I'm really worried about the lose skin on my stomach. I have a flap that really bothers me, it's not hideous but it's there. The rest of me is pretty darn nice, just my tummy needs work. I'm so nervous about having sex with anyone new over this. I can't afford to have plastic surgery till next year but I don't want to wait to date that long! How important do you think it is that I have a perfect or at least, flat tummy?

No hubby. single!! ????