Garifab_VSG

I totally get the cold feet feeling now. Two days ago, my surgeon's office called me to set the date for my surgery. That is when it felt so real. My heart started racing and I asked myself if I was doing the right thing. Of course, I reminded myself that I am. I set the date (3/31) and I plan on using the remaining weeks to wrap my head around the very real changes that are about to come.

I like knowing what meals others are making for dinner. I get stagnant on dinner ideas often, and it gives me new ideas to try.

Can anyone tell me which thread this is in reference to?

!!????!!

@@lynneanne re: the bolded from your post - If there's one thing that has been drilled into my head by friends of mine who have had VSG, it's that even with the sleeve, you can still gain it back. One of my friends is 2.5 years out, one is 1.5 years out .. one has gained back over 20 lbs, and is having a b!tch of a time trying to re-lose that 20. Anyway, I keep reminding myself of that. I'm still pre-op, but from all that I've read and heard from friends, it's critical to go into this surgery with the right mindset, and not rely on the surgery as a solution. It's just a tool, and a tool we need to work faithfully!

Perspective is what you see from where you stand. I think what the OP said/saw/felt was normal for someone in her position. I am in the same position (pre-op) and I, too, would probably think the same things if I saw that. I also think it's normal for someone post-op who has indulged when the need arises to feel the sting of what she said. My post adds no value. I just think no one should jump on anyone's head for feeling a certain way when they don't know what the other side feels like just yet.

Dexter is a good one, too. I was obsessed with it while it aired every season. My favorites are Sons of Anarchy, The Walking Dead, and Breaking Bad. Such good stuff right there.

My hospital's bariatric surgery group tells you up front that there is a non-refundable (even if your insurance ends up denying you) fee of $600 that covers the psychiatric part, the nutritionist, and all other things insurance won't. But it also covers LIFETIME nutritionist appts. and support groups for their bariatric patients, so that's pretty awesome. I have an H M O, so aside from my per diem in-hospital fee of $150 p/day, I do not have any other out of pocket expenses. Oh, plus the specialist copays for my insurance, which for me is $40 per. (Cardiologist, Pulmonary doc., etc.)

I'll just put it out there. I'm REALLY hoping to lose most of my chest post-surgery. I live my life in extreme pain because of the weight of my chest. My mid-back, most days, is in excruciating pain. My shoulders are starting to hurt now, too, and I am seeing what I hope are not permanent indentations from my bra straps. Has your breast size gone down post op? If so, please include how far post-op you are!

My surgeon told me outright that eventually, it will stretch. But never back to the full size it had been.

Wait, did you cross-post this? I swear I just commented on this same topic and it was a much longer thread.

@@amazon, I am cracking up at "curb feelers." LOL.

Is your husband overweight/obese? That could be a reason for sabotage - if he doesn't want to be obese alone, but doesn't want to do anything about it, either. I have also heard of some husbands feeling threatened by the surgery because post-weight loss, their wives will garner much more attention from other men, and content husbands don't want to deal with that "threat." I'm not generally speaking, but I have known three people whom this has happened to. They all ended up separating/divorcing.

If my booty starts to go, I will throw a fricken party because that's my biggest problem area! LOL. That's all I'm sayin'!

That's a really crappy response, and honestly, I think she's jealous. Her one comment about how now you'll be skinnier than she is was very telling. Good for you for moving forward anyway. Don't let anyone or anything get you down!

You are gorgeous!

HOT!!!! Well done!

I haven't had this happen (I haven't had my surgery yet) but my thought on the subject is that when you hate yourself and feel unworthy, you are accepting of sub-par and disappointing (even abusive) relationships because you don't think you deserve anything better. With this surgery seems to come MUCH greater confidence, which leads to self-worth, which leads to loving yourself, and refusing to accept less than what you deserve - a 100% loving and happy relationship. And that will often lead to divorce, or ending long-term partnerships that you may have accepted during the self-hating part of your life. I also think that being morbidly obese is (or can be), in itself, an indicator of an unhappy relationship. We are unfulfilled in love, therefore we turn to food for comfort, or to fill voids that we have in other areas of life. So once the weight loss that comes with surgery happens, you are more likely to ditch the relationship that was making you so unhappy and creating that cycle. These are my theories, and in some way, I've experienced the acceptance of a sub-par relationship due to not feeling worthy of more. So I don't think they are very far fetched theories just because I haven't had the surgery yet!

@@bobbyswife, your husband does not look his age. Very hot!

I'm pretty certain that it is NEVER ok for a co-worker to comment on your breasts in any way, shape or form. That's a very no-no conversation in the workplace. Well, in a corporate workplace anyway.

I was just about to start my own thread about getting the process started and the length of time it all takes, and my obsession with thinking about it. I've been tossing the idea for VSG around for a long time, working up the nerve for it, and I feel like since I've been thinking about it for SO LONG, the process feels like it's even slower now that I've gotten started. I have an H M O (procedure is covered 100%) but I had to see my PCP first to get the referral. Did that on 11/4. Had my first meeting with the bariatric surgeon on 11/17, and just two days ago, got the call from the bariatric team saying that they've verified my insurance and will be sending me out my packet of appointments with the specialists for testing and all within 1-2 weeks. I just feel like this is all taking SOOOOOOO LONG and it hasn't even been that long for me yet. I guess it's because I literally think about it probably at least 10 times an hour every day, all day. Sigh.

I can't imagine how deflating that must be

I love this thread so much. Congrats! So happy for you, and can't wait to feel that way too!

Oh, and if I were in your shoes, I would bust that egg wide open right off the bat and let her know now. I used to be that person who said I would never have weight loss surgery. But once I had about 4-5 people around me have it, it started to appear as more of an option. Knowledge is power, and those people sharing their stories convinced me it's not so bad. That being said, I'm still on the side of the fence where I won't be broadcasting it myself to anyone other than close friends and family, but that's just how I feel at this point in time (pre-surgery, no surgery date even scheduled yet.) Anything can change.

I'm apt to think that a friend is not a "true" friend if they can't be happy for you when you better yourself. I mean, I get wanting to be able to relate to someone, but to go through the roof with jealousy when a friend becomes healthier? That's sad. I hope your friendship can survive this