Pac-woman

I feel that I need to share a statement that was written by someone who is a friend of my coworker. I wish I knew who it was so I can give proper credits. But this statement will really explain how it is to people who dare to say that "surgery is the way out". There is absolutely NOTHING easy about weight loss surgery. Enjoy.
 
Why surgery is the "easy way out" for weight loss!
 
Yep, you heard that right. I've decided that I agree with the myriad non-surgical, gym-loving, overwhelming weight loss successes that feel strongly (and vocally) that surgery is the easy way out. They really are correct. We all should be ashamed of ourselves for taking the shortcut approach and racking up an "un-earned win".
 
Just think about it. To successfully lose weight without surgery, all you have to do is two things:


eat less

exercise often

 
With surgery, you only have to do one thing:


pay a surgeon to make you lose weight

 
Well, perhaps that's a minor oversimplification. There are a few other steps, but they are tiny and insignificant. Not everyone has to do them either! But, just for the sake of objectivity I’ll list most of them that I can think of. (I might miss a couple, but since surgery is the easy way out who cares really.) Let’s see, there is:


Convince yourself that you want to do this. This is much more complicated than it seems, so take your time. Don’t get sick before you make a decision.

Convince your doctor that this is medically necessary. Convince him/her that you really do want this and you aren’t just someone unwilling to sweat a little. Convince them that you won’t die on the table. Convince them that you aren’t doing this so you can keep eating cake for breakfast. And lunch. And dinner. Because that’s the only reason big people are big people.

Spend anywhere between 3 months and a year working with your PCP to make a preliminary run at losing weight. This should include:


A special diet

Exercise

Constant office visits to measure progress

Significant expense to participate in the diet (Nutrisystem, Medifast, and Jenny Craig, I’m looking at you!)

Lots of documentation

Likely (if not anticipated) painful, humiliating failure (PS, this is a requirement!)
 
[*]
Spend hours to days or more working with your insurance company website, phone reps, and via letter to determine if weight loss surgery is covered at all, assuming they will admit to it.
[*]
Once you find out it is covered, find out what exactly is covered. Type of surgery, location, type of doctors required, pre-op programs necessary, pre-op medical requirements, pre-op diet requirements, and documentation. Make sure you understand it all clearly because…
[*]
Meet with your PCP to go over all of the above. Explain to them what most of it means, because they don’t understand. Make sure your work so far will meet the needs of the insurance company. Convince him/her to do the work to get the approval. If not, return to step 1 and try again. (Note: make sure you do all of this quickly- most of these rules are subject to change on January 1, even if you have a 12 month diet requirement. You’ll need to find a way to violate the laws of space and time on your own.)
[*]
Get a psych evaluation. People who want this surgery are invariably crazy, so we need to confirm that. Don’t use a doc you know. Go somewhere you’ve never been so that they can get that first-blush, cover of the book impression of your particular brand of crazy in the 45 minutes you get with them. Let them write their report confirming your “crazy flavor” to your docs and insurance. They will approve you anyway.
[*]
Take an online class that confirms the crazy diagnosis.
[*]
Take another online class that basically tells you if you have the surgery you will likely die horribly on the table, if you’re lucky. You might just become a vegetable and be a possibly fabulous looking skinny burden on everyone you know and love!
[*]
Find a surgeon that can both perform the surgery (practically, legally, and allowable by the insurance) as well as doing so without causing


Errors

Infections

Hernias

Leaks

Death
 
[*]
Make sure that doc can take your insurance. Not just yoru insurance, but your exact insurance. This may require them to check at least a dozen contracts.
[*]
Do the same for the hospital.
[*]
Make sure that hospital you’ll have the surgery in isn’t a festering wound itself. The surgeon can only do so much if when you get to the floor you’re placed in the same bed last used by an Ebola patient with a cold and cleaned by “Blind Larry”. Fortunately there are many websites sponsored by government agencies to help you with this. They will all disagree with each other.
[*]
Get insurance authorization to have the surgery. Fortunately this process starts the weight loss, as one arm and one leg weigh a surprising amount when removed and given to them. This should take no more than a day or two, tops.
[*]
Have a discussion with your employer. Let them know that you’ll need a full week off from work in the near future. You know, when you aren’t busy and won’t be missed. Again, if you’re lucky you’ll have vacation and can use that. If not, think of how much extra weight you’ll lose when you can’t afford to eat for lack of a paycheck! OH, you may need more than a week. If you come out healthy. If not, it’ll be more. A lot more.
[*]
Have a discussion with your family, if you haven’t yet. If you haven’t yet, shame on you for your discretion, personal space, and recognition of the gravity of this decision. Make sure that you convince them that you won’t die, runaway with David Beckham or Eva Longoria (or both if you’re flexible), or otherwise ruin the home.
[*]
Get answers to all of the questions you have. Fortunately ObesityHelp is a great place for that. You will get no less than 10 answers to every question. Some may actually agree. ☺
[*]
Make sure that this is really what you want. This isn’t like buying a car or getting married. This is permanent and there is no going back. Still confident this is the right choice? Now you know your flavor of crazy from item 7.
[*]
Go on a liquid diet. You may not have anything that you cannot “read a newspaper through”, is solid, has calories, has carbs, has protein, has flavor, or is made of a natural substance. This will last anywhere from two days to a month. Your surgeon will tell you how long.
[*]
While on the clear liquid diet, please try not to cheat on the diet. More importantly, please try not to defecate on yourself. Here’s a mantra for you: “Never trust a fart!”
[*]
Have the surgery. This will include:


Large, but not quite large enough gowns with special butt exposing panels

Freezing rooms

Needle fears

Vein scavenger hunts

Panic attacks

Several other fun moments no one will spoil for you to discover
 
[*]
Recover from the surgery. This will include:


Amazing drugs that will make you fear for the poor 110lb nurse that will help you walk at first. Please don’t fall during this time or you will crush her. You’ll fear this, but only briefly (great drugs remember). Just don’t fall.

Walking. Yes, you’ve just had your entire insides rearranged and have more stitching in you than a rented tuxedo, but hey, let’s go for a walk. Every hour.

Eating. This is really a game. You have a 3ish ounce container that replaces your stomach. It is swollen, but you don’t really know how much. If you over fill it, you will be in serious pain, and may hurt yourself severely. Here’s the fun part- you’ll be given a selection of hald a dozen clear liquids to choose from. Some will make you retch. Some will taste like heaven. All are more than 3 oz. You- the person who’s complained that Mickey D’s quarter pounders have never once been a quarter pound – now get to determine what 3 oz looks like. Don’t forget two very important things.
[*]
Going to a bathroom. The author of this article is a male, so with that perspective in mind, consider the male stereotype of urinating. Now imagine that sharpshooter in the hands of someone who cannot see straight, or single vision, is falling asleep on their feet, whose prostate is not yet awake from surgery but whose bladder most definitely is, and who is currently on their 4th IV bag of saline with lactated ringers running wide open. Don’t forget to measure your output!
 

[*]
Go home! This is the easy part. Stuff your swollen and now anesthesia free self into a car and try to avoid potholes, cough, sneeze, or breathe too hard.
[*]
Continue the clear liquid diet for a few more days
[*]
Progress to protein drinks. These are a joy. There are few if any samples, so make sure you get the 5lb bottle to be sure you love it.
[*]
Progress to pureed or baby food
[*]
Progress to cat food or tuna
[*]
Progress to gourmet cat food or flavored tuna / canned chicken
[*]
Progress to dog food or chunky soups / heavily cooked soft and unflavored chicken
[*]
Progress to human food. During this time you will need to learn a few things. These will include:


How to eat. Remember you’ve been doing it wrong all your life so this should be easy.

You may only have dense protein.

You must take in no more than 3-4 oz.

You must take an entire 30 minutes in which to do so.

You may not drink before, during, or after the meal.

You may not have anything spicy.

You may not have anything with carbs.

No alcohol for at least 6 months, or maybe forever.

Nothing liquid.

Carbonated anything is permanently off the menu for the rest of your life.

Nothing with caffeine.

Nothing with less than a 10:1 ratio of protein to carbs

Keep calories as low as possible.

Learn to keep something that meets all of your dietary needs handy. If you need to eat, not every place can meet your “special needs”.

Make sure that you understand that you need to do this for the rest of your life. You can’t change this. Non Surgical people can indulge once and awhile. They can cheat. We rupture.
 
[*]
Please remember to keep your intake to levels that would make Ethiopians send you food. This is generally 800 calories, less than 40 carbs, and more than 80 grams of protein per day. You must do all of this in 3 meals with no snacks.
[*]
Take your supplements:


Calcium. Note that it isn’t the same calcium that you can get for a dime on any gas station shelf (Calcium Carbonate). This is a highly refined form of easily absorbable calcium (Calcium Citrate). It will come in three forms: A disgusting snot textured liquid found at Wal-Mart for $11 per week, a myriad of chewable pills that all taste like flavored drywall and cost about $20 per month, and delicious chewable candies that cost $40 per month.

Multivitamin. You’ll be doing double doses. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Fiber. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Iron. Some people will take iron. Get chewables.

B12. You can do pills under your tongue that taste like yesterday’s fish for $10/month, injections at the doc’s office every 3 weeks, or a nasal spray that costs $350/month.

Do all of the above for the rest of your life. Don’t stop or you’ll die.
 
[*]
Start to exercise! What, you thought that you didn’t have to exercise? Yep, here’s the trick. You are going to lose weight even if you don’t. Here’s the other trick. It’s easier to take that weight from your bones and muscles if you don’t exercise, so if you don’t work out, all that’s left will be fat!
[*]
No really, you have to exercise.
[*]
Yes, that means sweating.
[*]
Make sure that while you’re going through this easy time in which every hormone you have is at full tilt, every part of your body looks and feels funny, nothing fits, and you generally are proud that you’re losing while also being weirded out by how different everything feels you also take into account everyone else. Remember, this is about them and how they perceive you. You can’t be the popular kid. The healthy person without diabetes, hypertension, edema, or apnea. The more confident employee. The more confident lover. The physically stronger person. The person who wants attention. The person with self-esteem. You need to apologize frequently for these failures and must work hard to gently help these people along to where they can think of you as a lesser person for altogether different reasons than they did before, to preserve their psyche. Stop making your weight loss about you.


 
See? Even with these minor things, it’s obvious. Surgery is the easy way out. Don’t be a sucker. Be strong, and just eat less, and exercise more. It’s that simple!


You are stoned on anesthesia. Your judgment aint what it should be.

So is your stomach. It’s not going to help you by saying “I’m full” for about 2 weeks to a month.
 

Well, I haven't been on the site for a long time and thought to check in. So far i have lost 83 lbs. I am in a state that I don't know where to buy clothes. I go to the plus size section out of habit and can't find anything. Then I go to the junior section and I am baffled about how I can now fit into a large or xl in junior size. Amazing?!
 
I am now running on the treadmill which has shaped the body nicely so far. Also I have been doing weights: leg presses and shoulder lifts.

I feel that I need to share a statement that was written by someone who is a friend of my coworker. I wish I knew who it was so I can give proper credits. But this statement will really explain how it is to people who dare to say that "surgery is the way out". There is absolutely NOTHING easy about weight loss surgery. Enjoy.
 
Why surgery is the "easy way out" for weight loss!
 
Yep, you heard that right. I've decided that I agree with the myriad non-surgical, gym-loving, overwhelming weight loss successes that feel strongly (and vocally) that surgery is the easy way out. They really are correct. We all should be ashamed of ourselves for taking the shortcut approach and racking up an "un-earned win".
 
Just think about it. To successfully lose weight without surgery, all you have to do is two things:


eat less

exercise often

 
With surgery, you only have to do one thing:


pay a surgeon to make you lose weight

 
Well, perhaps that's a minor oversimplification. There are a few other steps, but they are tiny and insignificant. Not everyone has to do them either! But, just for the sake of objectivity I’ll list most of them that I can think of. (I might miss a couple, but since surgery is the easy way out who cares really.) Let’s see, there is:


Convince yourself that you want to do this. This is much more complicated than it seems, so take your time. Don’t get sick before you make a decision.

Convince your doctor that this is medically necessary. Convince him/her that you really do want this and you aren’t just someone unwilling to sweat a little. Convince them that you won’t die on the table. Convince them that you aren’t doing this so you can keep eating cake for breakfast. And lunch. And dinner. Because that’s the only reason big people are big people.

Spend anywhere between 3 months and a year working with your PCP to make a preliminary run at losing weight. This should include:


A special diet

Exercise

Constant office visits to measure progress

Significant expense to participate in the diet (Nutrisystem, Medifast, and Jenny Craig, I’m looking at you!)

Lots of documentation

Likely (if not anticipated) painful, humiliating failure (PS, this is a requirement!)
 
[*]
Spend hours to days or more working with your insurance company website, phone reps, and via letter to determine if weight loss surgery is covered at all, assuming they will admit to it.
[*]
Once you find out it is covered, find out what exactly is covered. Type of surgery, location, type of doctors required, pre-op programs necessary, pre-op medical requirements, pre-op diet requirements, and documentation. Make sure you understand it all clearly because…
[*]
Meet with your PCP to go over all of the above. Explain to them what most of it means, because they don’t understand. Make sure your work so far will meet the needs of the insurance company. Convince him/her to do the work to get the approval. If not, return to step 1 and try again. (Note: make sure you do all of this quickly- most of these rules are subject to change on January 1, even if you have a 12 month diet requirement. You’ll need to find a way to violate the laws of space and time on your own.)
[*]
Get a psych evaluation. People who want this surgery are invariably crazy, so we need to confirm that. Don’t use a doc you know. Go somewhere you’ve never been so that they can get that first-blush, cover of the book impression of your particular brand of crazy in the 45 minutes you get with them. Let them write their report confirming your “crazy flavor” to your docs and insurance. They will approve you anyway.
[*]
Take an online class that confirms the crazy diagnosis.
[*]
Take another online class that basically tells you if you have the surgery you will likely die horribly on the table, if you’re lucky. You might just become a vegetable and be a possibly fabulous looking skinny burden on everyone you know and love!
[*]
Find a surgeon that can both perform the surgery (practically, legally, and allowable by the insurance) as well as doing so without causing


Errors

Infections

Hernias

Leaks

Death
 
[*]
Make sure that doc can take your insurance. Not just yoru insurance, but your exact insurance. This may require them to check at least a dozen contracts.
[*]
Do the same for the hospital.
[*]
Make sure that hospital you’ll have the surgery in isn’t a festering wound itself. The surgeon can only do so much if when you get to the floor you’re placed in the same bed last used by an Ebola patient with a cold and cleaned by “Blind Larry”. Fortunately there are many websites sponsored by government agencies to help you with this. They will all disagree with each other.
[*]
Get insurance authorization to have the surgery. Fortunately this process starts the weight loss, as one arm and one leg weigh a surprising amount when removed and given to them. This should take no more than a day or two, tops.
[*]
Have a discussion with your employer. Let them know that you’ll need a full week off from work in the near future. You know, when you aren’t busy and won’t be missed. Again, if you’re lucky you’ll have vacation and can use that. If not, think of how much extra weight you’ll lose when you can’t afford to eat for lack of a paycheck! OH, you may need more than a week. If you come out healthy. If not, it’ll be more. A lot more.
[*]
Have a discussion with your family, if you haven’t yet. If you haven’t yet, shame on you for your discretion, personal space, and recognition of the gravity of this decision. Make sure that you convince them that you won’t die, runaway with David Beckham or Eva Longoria (or both if you’re flexible), or otherwise ruin the home.
[*]
Get answers to all of the questions you have. Fortunately ObesityHelp is a great place for that. You will get no less than 10 answers to every question. Some may actually agree. ☺
[*]
Make sure that this is really what you want. This isn’t like buying a car or getting married. This is permanent and there is no going back. Still confident this is the right choice? Now you know your flavor of crazy from item 7.
[*]
Go on a liquid diet. You may not have anything that you cannot “read a newspaper through”, is solid, has calories, has carbs, has protein, has flavor, or is made of a natural substance. This will last anywhere from two days to a month. Your surgeon will tell you how long.
[*]
While on the clear liquid diet, please try not to cheat on the diet. More importantly, please try not to defecate on yourself. Here’s a mantra for you: “Never trust a fart!”
[*]
Have the surgery. This will include:


Large, but not quite large enough gowns with special butt exposing panels

Freezing rooms

Needle fears

Vein scavenger hunts

Panic attacks

Several other fun moments no one will spoil for you to discover
 
[*]
Recover from the surgery. This will include:


Amazing drugs that will make you fear for the poor 110lb nurse that will help you walk at first. Please don’t fall during this time or you will crush her. You’ll fear this, but only briefly (great drugs remember). Just don’t fall.

Walking. Yes, you’ve just had your entire insides rearranged and have more stitching in you than a rented tuxedo, but hey, let’s go for a walk. Every hour.

Eating. This is really a game. You have a 3ish ounce container that replaces your stomach. It is swollen, but you don’t really know how much. If you over fill it, you will be in serious pain, and may hurt yourself severely. Here’s the fun part- you’ll be given a selection of hald a dozen clear liquids to choose from. Some will make you retch. Some will taste like heaven. All are more than 3 oz. You- the person who’s complained that Mickey D’s quarter pounders have never once been a quarter pound – now get to determine what 3 oz looks like. Don’t forget two very important things.
[*]
Going to a bathroom. The author of this article is a male, so with that perspective in mind, consider the male stereotype of urinating. Now imagine that sharpshooter in the hands of someone who cannot see straight, or single vision, is falling asleep on their feet, whose prostate is not yet awake from surgery but whose bladder most definitely is, and who is currently on their 4th IV bag of saline with lactated ringers running wide open. Don’t forget to measure your output!
 

[*]
Go home! This is the easy part. Stuff your swollen and now anesthesia free self into a car and try to avoid potholes, cough, sneeze, or breathe too hard.
[*]
Continue the clear liquid diet for a few more days
[*]
Progress to protein drinks. These are a joy. There are few if any samples, so make sure you get the 5lb bottle to be sure you love it.
[*]
Progress to pureed or baby food
[*]
Progress to cat food or tuna
[*]
Progress to gourmet cat food or flavored tuna / canned chicken
[*]
Progress to dog food or chunky soups / heavily cooked soft and unflavored chicken
[*]
Progress to human food. During this time you will need to learn a few things. These will include:


How to eat. Remember you’ve been doing it wrong all your life so this should be easy.

You may only have dense protein.

You must take in no more than 3-4 oz.

You must take an entire 30 minutes in which to do so.

You may not drink before, during, or after the meal.

You may not have anything spicy.

You may not have anything with carbs.

No alcohol for at least 6 months, or maybe forever.

Nothing liquid.

Carbonated anything is permanently off the menu for the rest of your life.

Nothing with caffeine.

Nothing with less than a 10:1 ratio of protein to carbs

Keep calories as low as possible.

Learn to keep something that meets all of your dietary needs handy. If you need to eat, not every place can meet your “special needs”.

Make sure that you understand that you need to do this for the rest of your life. You can’t change this. Non Surgical people can indulge once and awhile. They can cheat. We rupture.
 
[*]
Please remember to keep your intake to levels that would make Ethiopians send you food. This is generally 800 calories, less than 40 carbs, and more than 80 grams of protein per day. You must do all of this in 3 meals with no snacks.
[*]
Take your supplements:


Calcium. Note that it isn’t the same calcium that you can get for a dime on any gas station shelf (Calcium Carbonate). This is a highly refined form of easily absorbable calcium (Calcium Citrate). It will come in three forms: A disgusting snot textured liquid found at Wal-Mart for $11 per week, a myriad of chewable pills that all taste like flavored drywall and cost about $20 per month, and delicious chewable candies that cost $40 per month.

Multivitamin. You’ll be doing double doses. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Fiber. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Iron. Some people will take iron. Get chewables.

B12. You can do pills under your tongue that taste like yesterday’s fish for $10/month, injections at the doc’s office every 3 weeks, or a nasal spray that costs $350/month.

Do all of the above for the rest of your life. Don’t stop or you’ll die.
 
[*]
Start to exercise! What, you thought that you didn’t have to exercise? Yep, here’s the trick. You are going to lose weight even if you don’t. Here’s the other trick. It’s easier to take that weight from your bones and muscles if you don’t exercise, so if you don’t work out, all that’s left will be fat!
[*]
No really, you have to exercise.
[*]
Yes, that means sweating.
[*]
Make sure that while you’re going through this easy time in which every hormone you have is at full tilt, every part of your body looks and feels funny, nothing fits, and you generally are proud that you’re losing while also being weirded out by how different everything feels you also take into account everyone else. Remember, this is about them and how they perceive you. You can’t be the popular kid. The healthy person without diabetes, hypertension, edema, or apnea. The more confident employee. The more confident lover. The physically stronger person. The person who wants attention. The person with self-esteem. You need to apologize frequently for these failures and must work hard to gently help these people along to where they can think of you as a lesser person for altogether different reasons than they did before, to preserve their psyche. Stop making your weight loss about you.


 
See? Even with these minor things, it’s obvious. Surgery is the easy way out. Don’t be a sucker. Be strong, and just eat less, and exercise more. It’s that simple!


You are stoned on anesthesia. Your judgment aint what it should be.

So is your stomach. It’s not going to help you by saying “I’m full” for about 2 weeks to a month.
 

Hello, 
 
Attached you will find a document with good information on the gastric sleeve I was give. The document contains over the counter meds that you can or cannot take after surgery and  also shake recipes.
 
gastric sleeve instructions (1).pdf

I feel that I need to share a statement that was written by someone who is a friend of my coworker. I wish I knew who it was so I can give proper credits. But this statement will really explain how it is to people who dare to say that "surgery is the way out". There is absolutely NOTHING easy about weight loss surgery. Enjoy.
 
Why surgery is the "easy way out" for weight loss!
 
Yep, you heard that right. I've decided that I agree with the myriad non-surgical, gym-loving, overwhelming weight loss successes that feel strongly (and vocally) that surgery is the easy way out. They really are correct. We all should be ashamed of ourselves for taking the shortcut approach and racking up an "un-earned win".
 
Just think about it. To successfully lose weight without surgery, all you have to do is two things:


eat less

exercise often

 
With surgery, you only have to do one thing:


pay a surgeon to make you lose weight

 
Well, perhaps that's a minor oversimplification. There are a few other steps, but they are tiny and insignificant. Not everyone has to do them either! But, just for the sake of objectivity I’ll list most of them that I can think of. (I might miss a couple, but since surgery is the easy way out who cares really.) Let’s see, there is:


Convince yourself that you want to do this. This is much more complicated than it seems, so take your time. Don’t get sick before you make a decision.

Convince your doctor that this is medically necessary. Convince him/her that you really do want this and you aren’t just someone unwilling to sweat a little. Convince them that you won’t die on the table. Convince them that you aren’t doing this so you can keep eating cake for breakfast. And lunch. And dinner. Because that’s the only reason big people are big people.

Spend anywhere between 3 months and a year working with your PCP to make a preliminary run at losing weight. This should include:


A special diet

Exercise

Constant office visits to measure progress

Significant expense to participate in the diet (Nutrisystem, Medifast, and Jenny Craig, I’m looking at you!)

Lots of documentation

Likely (if not anticipated) painful, humiliating failure (PS, this is a requirement!)
 
[*]
Spend hours to days or more working with your insurance company website, phone reps, and via letter to determine if weight loss surgery is covered at all, assuming they will admit to it.
[*]
Once you find out it is covered, find out what exactly is covered. Type of surgery, location, type of doctors required, pre-op programs necessary, pre-op medical requirements, pre-op diet requirements, and documentation. Make sure you understand it all clearly because…
[*]
Meet with your PCP to go over all of the above. Explain to them what most of it means, because they don’t understand. Make sure your work so far will meet the needs of the insurance company. Convince him/her to do the work to get the approval. If not, return to step 1 and try again. (Note: make sure you do all of this quickly- most of these rules are subject to change on January 1, even if you have a 12 month diet requirement. You’ll need to find a way to violate the laws of space and time on your own.)
[*]
Get a psych evaluation. People who want this surgery are invariably crazy, so we need to confirm that. Don’t use a doc you know. Go somewhere you’ve never been so that they can get that first-blush, cover of the book impression of your particular brand of crazy in the 45 minutes you get with them. Let them write their report confirming your “crazy flavor” to your docs and insurance. They will approve you anyway.
[*]
Take an online class that confirms the crazy diagnosis.
[*]
Take another online class that basically tells you if you have the surgery you will likely die horribly on the table, if you’re lucky. You might just become a vegetable and be a possibly fabulous looking skinny burden on everyone you know and love!
[*]
Find a surgeon that can both perform the surgery (practically, legally, and allowable by the insurance) as well as doing so without causing


Errors

Infections

Hernias

Leaks

Death
 
[*]
Make sure that doc can take your insurance. Not just yoru insurance, but your exact insurance. This may require them to check at least a dozen contracts.
[*]
Do the same for the hospital.
[*]
Make sure that hospital you’ll have the surgery in isn’t a festering wound itself. The surgeon can only do so much if when you get to the floor you’re placed in the same bed last used by an Ebola patient with a cold and cleaned by “Blind Larry”. Fortunately there are many websites sponsored by government agencies to help you with this. They will all disagree with each other.
[*]
Get insurance authorization to have the surgery. Fortunately this process starts the weight loss, as one arm and one leg weigh a surprising amount when removed and given to them. This should take no more than a day or two, tops.
[*]
Have a discussion with your employer. Let them know that you’ll need a full week off from work in the near future. You know, when you aren’t busy and won’t be missed. Again, if you’re lucky you’ll have vacation and can use that. If not, think of how much extra weight you’ll lose when you can’t afford to eat for lack of a paycheck! OH, you may need more than a week. If you come out healthy. If not, it’ll be more. A lot more.
[*]
Have a discussion with your family, if you haven’t yet. If you haven’t yet, shame on you for your discretion, personal space, and recognition of the gravity of this decision. Make sure that you convince them that you won’t die, runaway with David Beckham or Eva Longoria (or both if you’re flexible), or otherwise ruin the home.
[*]
Get answers to all of the questions you have. Fortunately ObesityHelp is a great place for that. You will get no less than 10 answers to every question. Some may actually agree. ☺
[*]
Make sure that this is really what you want. This isn’t like buying a car or getting married. This is permanent and there is no going back. Still confident this is the right choice? Now you know your flavor of crazy from item 7.
[*]
Go on a liquid diet. You may not have anything that you cannot “read a newspaper through”, is solid, has calories, has carbs, has protein, has flavor, or is made of a natural substance. This will last anywhere from two days to a month. Your surgeon will tell you how long.
[*]
While on the clear liquid diet, please try not to cheat on the diet. More importantly, please try not to defecate on yourself. Here’s a mantra for you: “Never trust a fart!”
[*]
Have the surgery. This will include:


Large, but not quite large enough gowns with special butt exposing panels

Freezing rooms

Needle fears

Vein scavenger hunts

Panic attacks

Several other fun moments no one will spoil for you to discover
 
[*]
Recover from the surgery. This will include:


Amazing drugs that will make you fear for the poor 110lb nurse that will help you walk at first. Please don’t fall during this time or you will crush her. You’ll fear this, but only briefly (great drugs remember). Just don’t fall.

Walking. Yes, you’ve just had your entire insides rearranged and have more stitching in you than a rented tuxedo, but hey, let’s go for a walk. Every hour.

Eating. This is really a game. You have a 3ish ounce container that replaces your stomach. It is swollen, but you don’t really know how much. If you over fill it, you will be in serious pain, and may hurt yourself severely. Here’s the fun part- you’ll be given a selection of hald a dozen clear liquids to choose from. Some will make you retch. Some will taste like heaven. All are more than 3 oz. You- the person who’s complained that Mickey D’s quarter pounders have never once been a quarter pound – now get to determine what 3 oz looks like. Don’t forget two very important things.
[*]
Going to a bathroom. The author of this article is a male, so with that perspective in mind, consider the male stereotype of urinating. Now imagine that sharpshooter in the hands of someone who cannot see straight, or single vision, is falling asleep on their feet, whose prostate is not yet awake from surgery but whose bladder most definitely is, and who is currently on their 4th IV bag of saline with lactated ringers running wide open. Don’t forget to measure your output!
 

[*]
Go home! This is the easy part. Stuff your swollen and now anesthesia free self into a car and try to avoid potholes, cough, sneeze, or breathe too hard.
[*]
Continue the clear liquid diet for a few more days
[*]
Progress to protein drinks. These are a joy. There are few if any samples, so make sure you get the 5lb bottle to be sure you love it.
[*]
Progress to pureed or baby food
[*]
Progress to cat food or tuna
[*]
Progress to gourmet cat food or flavored tuna / canned chicken
[*]
Progress to dog food or chunky soups / heavily cooked soft and unflavored chicken
[*]
Progress to human food. During this time you will need to learn a few things. These will include:


How to eat. Remember you’ve been doing it wrong all your life so this should be easy.

You may only have dense protein.

You must take in no more than 3-4 oz.

You must take an entire 30 minutes in which to do so.

You may not drink before, during, or after the meal.

You may not have anything spicy.

You may not have anything with carbs.

No alcohol for at least 6 months, or maybe forever.

Nothing liquid.

Carbonated anything is permanently off the menu for the rest of your life.

Nothing with caffeine.

Nothing with less than a 10:1 ratio of protein to carbs

Keep calories as low as possible.

Learn to keep something that meets all of your dietary needs handy. If you need to eat, not every place can meet your “special needs”.

Make sure that you understand that you need to do this for the rest of your life. You can’t change this. Non Surgical people can indulge once and awhile. They can cheat. We rupture.
 
[*]
Please remember to keep your intake to levels that would make Ethiopians send you food. This is generally 800 calories, less than 40 carbs, and more than 80 grams of protein per day. You must do all of this in 3 meals with no snacks.
[*]
Take your supplements:


Calcium. Note that it isn’t the same calcium that you can get for a dime on any gas station shelf (Calcium Carbonate). This is a highly refined form of easily absorbable calcium (Calcium Citrate). It will come in three forms: A disgusting snot textured liquid found at Wal-Mart for $11 per week, a myriad of chewable pills that all taste like flavored drywall and cost about $20 per month, and delicious chewable candies that cost $40 per month.

Multivitamin. You’ll be doing double doses. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Fiber. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Iron. Some people will take iron. Get chewables.

B12. You can do pills under your tongue that taste like yesterday’s fish for $10/month, injections at the doc’s office every 3 weeks, or a nasal spray that costs $350/month.

Do all of the above for the rest of your life. Don’t stop or you’ll die.
 
[*]
Start to exercise! What, you thought that you didn’t have to exercise? Yep, here’s the trick. You are going to lose weight even if you don’t. Here’s the other trick. It’s easier to take that weight from your bones and muscles if you don’t exercise, so if you don’t work out, all that’s left will be fat!
[*]
No really, you have to exercise.
[*]
Yes, that means sweating.
[*]
Make sure that while you’re going through this easy time in which every hormone you have is at full tilt, every part of your body looks and feels funny, nothing fits, and you generally are proud that you’re losing while also being weirded out by how different everything feels you also take into account everyone else. Remember, this is about them and how they perceive you. You can’t be the popular kid. The healthy person without diabetes, hypertension, edema, or apnea. The more confident employee. The more confident lover. The physically stronger person. The person who wants attention. The person with self-esteem. You need to apologize frequently for these failures and must work hard to gently help these people along to where they can think of you as a lesser person for altogether different reasons than they did before, to preserve their psyche. Stop making your weight loss about you.


 
See? Even with these minor things, it’s obvious. Surgery is the easy way out. Don’t be a sucker. Be strong, and just eat less, and exercise more. It’s that simple!


You are stoned on anesthesia. Your judgment aint what it should be.

So is your stomach. It’s not going to help you by saying “I’m full” for about 2 weeks to a month.
 

I feel that I need to share a statement that was written by someone who is a friend of my coworker. I wish I knew who it was so I can give proper credits. But this statement will really explain how it is to people who dare to say that "surgery is the way out". There is absolutely NOTHING easy about weight loss surgery. Enjoy.
 
Why surgery is the "easy way out" for weight loss!
 
Yep, you heard that right. I've decided that I agree with the myriad non-surgical, gym-loving, overwhelming weight loss successes that feel strongly (and vocally) that surgery is the easy way out. They really are correct. We all should be ashamed of ourselves for taking the shortcut approach and racking up an "un-earned win".
 
Just think about it. To successfully lose weight without surgery, all you have to do is two things:


eat less

exercise often

 
With surgery, you only have to do one thing:


pay a surgeon to make you lose weight

 
Well, perhaps that's a minor oversimplification. There are a few other steps, but they are tiny and insignificant. Not everyone has to do them either! But, just for the sake of objectivity I’ll list most of them that I can think of. (I might miss a couple, but since surgery is the easy way out who cares really.) Let’s see, there is:


Convince yourself that you want to do this. This is much more complicated than it seems, so take your time. Don’t get sick before you make a decision.

Convince your doctor that this is medically necessary. Convince him/her that you really do want this and you aren’t just someone unwilling to sweat a little. Convince them that you won’t die on the table. Convince them that you aren’t doing this so you can keep eating cake for breakfast. And lunch. And dinner. Because that’s the only reason big people are big people.

Spend anywhere between 3 months and a year working with your PCP to make a preliminary run at losing weight. This should include:


A special diet

Exercise

Constant office visits to measure progress

Significant expense to participate in the diet (Nutrisystem, Medifast, and Jenny Craig, I’m looking at you!)

Lots of documentation

Likely (if not anticipated) painful, humiliating failure (PS, this is a requirement!)
 
[*]
Spend hours to days or more working with your insurance company website, phone reps, and via letter to determine if weight loss surgery is covered at all, assuming they will admit to it.
[*]
Once you find out it is covered, find out what exactly is covered. Type of surgery, location, type of doctors required, pre-op programs necessary, pre-op medical requirements, pre-op diet requirements, and documentation. Make sure you understand it all clearly because…
[*]
Meet with your PCP to go over all of the above. Explain to them what most of it means, because they don’t understand. Make sure your work so far will meet the needs of the insurance company. Convince him/her to do the work to get the approval. If not, return to step 1 and try again. (Note: make sure you do all of this quickly- most of these rules are subject to change on January 1, even if you have a 12 month diet requirement. You’ll need to find a way to violate the laws of space and time on your own.)
[*]
Get a psych evaluation. People who want this surgery are invariably crazy, so we need to confirm that. Don’t use a doc you know. Go somewhere you’ve never been so that they can get that first-blush, cover of the book impression of your particular brand of crazy in the 45 minutes you get with them. Let them write their report confirming your “crazy flavor” to your docs and insurance. They will approve you anyway.
[*]
Take an online class that confirms the crazy diagnosis.
[*]
Take another online class that basically tells you if you have the surgery you will likely die horribly on the table, if you’re lucky. You might just become a vegetable and be a possibly fabulous looking skinny burden on everyone you know and love!
[*]
Find a surgeon that can both perform the surgery (practically, legally, and allowable by the insurance) as well as doing so without causing


Errors

Infections

Hernias

Leaks

Death
 
[*]
Make sure that doc can take your insurance. Not just yoru insurance, but your exact insurance. This may require them to check at least a dozen contracts.
[*]
Do the same for the hospital.
[*]
Make sure that hospital you’ll have the surgery in isn’t a festering wound itself. The surgeon can only do so much if when you get to the floor you’re placed in the same bed last used by an Ebola patient with a cold and cleaned by “Blind Larry”. Fortunately there are many websites sponsored by government agencies to help you with this. They will all disagree with each other.
[*]
Get insurance authorization to have the surgery. Fortunately this process starts the weight loss, as one arm and one leg weigh a surprising amount when removed and given to them. This should take no more than a day or two, tops.
[*]
Have a discussion with your employer. Let them know that you’ll need a full week off from work in the near future. You know, when you aren’t busy and won’t be missed. Again, if you’re lucky you’ll have vacation and can use that. If not, think of how much extra weight you’ll lose when you can’t afford to eat for lack of a paycheck! OH, you may need more than a week. If you come out healthy. If not, it’ll be more. A lot more.
[*]
Have a discussion with your family, if you haven’t yet. If you haven’t yet, shame on you for your discretion, personal space, and recognition of the gravity of this decision. Make sure that you convince them that you won’t die, runaway with David Beckham or Eva Longoria (or both if you’re flexible), or otherwise ruin the home.
[*]
Get answers to all of the questions you have. Fortunately ObesityHelp is a great place for that. You will get no less than 10 answers to every question. Some may actually agree. ☺
[*]
Make sure that this is really what you want. This isn’t like buying a car or getting married. This is permanent and there is no going back. Still confident this is the right choice? Now you know your flavor of crazy from item 7.
[*]
Go on a liquid diet. You may not have anything that you cannot “read a newspaper through”, is solid, has calories, has carbs, has protein, has flavor, or is made of a natural substance. This will last anywhere from two days to a month. Your surgeon will tell you how long.
[*]
While on the clear liquid diet, please try not to cheat on the diet. More importantly, please try not to defecate on yourself. Here’s a mantra for you: “Never trust a fart!”
[*]
Have the surgery. This will include:


Large, but not quite large enough gowns with special butt exposing panels

Freezing rooms

Needle fears

Vein scavenger hunts

Panic attacks

Several other fun moments no one will spoil for you to discover
 
[*]
Recover from the surgery. This will include:


Amazing drugs that will make you fear for the poor 110lb nurse that will help you walk at first. Please don’t fall during this time or you will crush her. You’ll fear this, but only briefly (great drugs remember). Just don’t fall.

Walking. Yes, you’ve just had your entire insides rearranged and have more stitching in you than a rented tuxedo, but hey, let’s go for a walk. Every hour.

Eating. This is really a game. You have a 3ish ounce container that replaces your stomach. It is swollen, but you don’t really know how much. If you over fill it, you will be in serious pain, and may hurt yourself severely. Here’s the fun part- you’ll be given a selection of hald a dozen clear liquids to choose from. Some will make you retch. Some will taste like heaven. All are more than 3 oz. You- the person who’s complained that Mickey D’s quarter pounders have never once been a quarter pound – now get to determine what 3 oz looks like. Don’t forget two very important things.
[*]
Going to a bathroom. The author of this article is a male, so with that perspective in mind, consider the male stereotype of urinating. Now imagine that sharpshooter in the hands of someone who cannot see straight, or single vision, is falling asleep on their feet, whose prostate is not yet awake from surgery but whose bladder most definitely is, and who is currently on their 4th IV bag of saline with lactated ringers running wide open. Don’t forget to measure your output!
 

[*]
Go home! This is the easy part. Stuff your swollen and now anesthesia free self into a car and try to avoid potholes, cough, sneeze, or breathe too hard.
[*]
Continue the clear liquid diet for a few more days
[*]
Progress to protein drinks. These are a joy. There are few if any samples, so make sure you get the 5lb bottle to be sure you love it.
[*]
Progress to pureed or baby food
[*]
Progress to cat food or tuna
[*]
Progress to gourmet cat food or flavored tuna / canned chicken
[*]
Progress to dog food or chunky soups / heavily cooked soft and unflavored chicken
[*]
Progress to human food. During this time you will need to learn a few things. These will include:


How to eat. Remember you’ve been doing it wrong all your life so this should be easy.

You may only have dense protein.

You must take in no more than 3-4 oz.

You must take an entire 30 minutes in which to do so.

You may not drink before, during, or after the meal.

You may not have anything spicy.

You may not have anything with carbs.

No alcohol for at least 6 months, or maybe forever.

Nothing liquid.

Carbonated anything is permanently off the menu for the rest of your life.

Nothing with caffeine.

Nothing with less than a 10:1 ratio of protein to carbs

Keep calories as low as possible.

Learn to keep something that meets all of your dietary needs handy. If you need to eat, not every place can meet your “special needs”.

Make sure that you understand that you need to do this for the rest of your life. You can’t change this. Non Surgical people can indulge once and awhile. They can cheat. We rupture.
 
[*]
Please remember to keep your intake to levels that would make Ethiopians send you food. This is generally 800 calories, less than 40 carbs, and more than 80 grams of protein per day. You must do all of this in 3 meals with no snacks.
[*]
Take your supplements:


Calcium. Note that it isn’t the same calcium that you can get for a dime on any gas station shelf (Calcium Carbonate). This is a highly refined form of easily absorbable calcium (Calcium Citrate). It will come in three forms: A disgusting snot textured liquid found at Wal-Mart for $11 per week, a myriad of chewable pills that all taste like flavored drywall and cost about $20 per month, and delicious chewable candies that cost $40 per month.

Multivitamin. You’ll be doing double doses. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Fiber. Get the adult gummy ones. Find the ones with no carbs.

Iron. Some people will take iron. Get chewables.

B12. You can do pills under your tongue that taste like yesterday’s fish for $10/month, injections at the doc’s office every 3 weeks, or a nasal spray that costs $350/month.

Do all of the above for the rest of your life. Don’t stop or you’ll die.
 
[*]
Start to exercise! What, you thought that you didn’t have to exercise? Yep, here’s the trick. You are going to lose weight even if you don’t. Here’s the other trick. It’s easier to take that weight from your bones and muscles if you don’t exercise, so if you don’t work out, all that’s left will be fat!
[*]
No really, you have to exercise.
[*]
Yes, that means sweating.
[*]
Make sure that while you’re going through this easy time in which every hormone you have is at full tilt, every part of your body looks and feels funny, nothing fits, and you generally are proud that you’re losing while also being weirded out by how different everything feels you also take into account everyone else. Remember, this is about them and how they perceive you. You can’t be the popular kid. The healthy person without diabetes, hypertension, edema, or apnea. The more confident employee. The more confident lover. The physically stronger person. The person who wants attention. The person with self-esteem. You need to apologize frequently for these failures and must work hard to gently help these people along to where they can think of you as a lesser person for altogether different reasons than they did before, to preserve their psyche. Stop making your weight loss about you.


 
See? Even with these minor things, it’s obvious. Surgery is the easy way out. Don’t be a sucker. Be strong, and just eat less, and exercise more. It’s that simple!


You are stoned on anesthesia. Your judgment aint what it should be.

So is your stomach. It’s not going to help you by saying “I’m full” for about 2 weeks to a month.
 

Hello, 
 
Attached you will find a document with good information on the gastric sleeve I was give. The document contains over the counter meds that you can or cannot take after surgery and  also shake recipes.
 
gastric sleeve instructions (1).pdf

I think things are starting to move again! I have learned so much in the past few days about how I eat and drink. I have learned about the foods my body isn't ready for and things I possibly can do better to stay on track! OLD HABITS have been creeping in and trying to surface.. YES, that thing called my eating addiction .... I was trying to eat more than I could possibly hold in my tummy and I was reminded quickly when I accidentally drank a sip of tea with my meal. DAMN, that hurts. I am learning to eat slower and enjoy what I can eat .... and don't even bother putting a drink near me when it is meal time. OLD HABITS are hard to break but thank you tummy for painfully reminding me that drinking with the meal is a NO NO. I have learned to just order a drink and set it aside and at the end of my meal get it to go. I do not drink while eating because: IT HURTS. =) And I have learned to chew chew chew and swallow small bites. I have also added an app to my phone that will snap a picture of the barcode I have eaten and plug in everything so calorie counting has now become my friend. That was something else I wasn't doing in the beginning because I thought ... DANG I can only eat an ounce or two! Well, I was shocked when we sat and checked calories on a bunch of items in the grocery store and dining out! I am still learning and will probably share again my silly mistakes, but they are worth every minute of my new healthy life!
 
I started a little ZUMBA today! That was a little embarrassing... and I was in my own work out room at home... but still felt embarrassed when my husband or boys walked in the gym. FAT GIRL attempting SALSA!! BUT .... mark my words.... a year from now I will be teaching that dadgum ZUMBA glass! It was a fun change and I will do it more and more and more... OH OH OH ... I was excited about my new purchases yesterday!! I finally found a 2X Sauna Suit and a plus size weight loss belt for when I exercise! I found them locally and inexpensive so I was exstatic!! Put the sauna suit on yesterday afternoon (a little tight in the belly) and went to walking on the treadmill .... After 15 minutes, I was sweating like a ... I dunno what to say here .... plus size woman in a sauna suit?? lol So, tomorrow morning, me and the sauna suit are going for a long test walk as I do normally, but with my new suit I hope to find that I am sweating off the inches and pounds!!
 
Well, that's it for today.. Super bowl Sunday and I found some fabulous recipes the family and I are going to try out instead of the usual fattening finger (oh so easy) foods we are accustomed too!
 
Have a great SUNDAY!!
 
twenty15

Well, here I am on the 16th day. Tomorrow I have my first follow up with my surgeon. I am nervous about it, not sure why. I hope I don't disappoint.
 
I am still struggling with solids. I am supposed to be on pureed food but I can't do it. So I stuck with protein shake and bars and soup. I have tried tinkering with certain solids but my stomach is not having it.
 
I think I am not chewing properly. I know we have to chew to the point of non existant, but I am not there yet.
 
Not a whole lot to say, other than I am on the dreaded 3rd week stall and I can barely make it to 400 calories.

I am six days post op and what a journey it has been! It seems like yesterday I was counting down the hours until my surgery! I had an excellent surgery and a overall quick recovery in the hospital. I'm not going to say it was all fun and games, but I do know if I had to see one more Bariatric tray of popsicles, diet cranberry juice, and broth, I think I would finally have to let out a BIG NO MORE liquid TRAYS!! I am over exaggerating a little, but I find it comical that the hospital brings so much to offer but you can only sip enough to get your lips wet and then you feel full!! It seemed as soon as I finished one popsicle it was time for my next big liquid meal!! I couldn't sip fast enough before the next meal was being served! With all that being said, I am extremely grateful for making the decision to start a new healthier life and even though this is the beginning and I know everything comes with ups and downs, I am going to make the best of this decision. I have dreamed of the day I don't have to feel as though everyone is talking about me, the fatest mom, or my kids won't have to look embarrassed when I would have to turn sideways to get through the security area at a local concert or amusment park. I can think of so many times my weight has altered things I could have been doing and chose not to simply because I was too overweight and did not want to be looked at or talked about once again. I now have visions of being challenged with this new life, but I have outweighed the challenges with positive reasonings. I want cake... eat half a sugar free pudding and be full and still loose weight. I have noticed that the thought is less impactful when there is NO choice... I no longer have the choice to fall of the DIET and gorge myself until I was sick. It is now a thought, a solution, and with great reward.. I will still have remained loyal to my new eating habits and that thought is gone in just a few seconds, whereas, before, I would turn into a three year old hissy fit until I got my own PINT of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie and ate the whole entire pint alone. I guess the moral to this Blog today is most of my FOOD issues were in my HEAD and now that I can not allow my HEAD to make such crazy decisions... I now listen to my little tummy and when I am full I QUIT. Now, let me remind you, this is just the beginning and I am sure soon enough there will be a fit to throw and I will make sure I let you in on those too!
 
Good luck with your daily decisions and Blog soon!
 
Christie