Pac-woman

OMG I can relate to this. I know how it feels when you just want something solid going into your tummy. liquid phase will be tough for me. I have been known to eat even if I just had a wisdom tooth taken out. lol

Could I add you as a friend? I would love to keep in touch. I can learn from you since you were so recent.

Thank you samuelsmom for reaching out to me. I am glad you connected to what I said. Trust me, it takes a lot for me to open up on the internet. I always did feel I have this mysterious disease that no doctor can figure out and it is causing my weight gain. Like something from syfy, I swear. I know I have bad habits I need to break, and the fact that I sit all day in a cubicle is what has contributed the most to my weight gain. I started doing walks on my 15 min break just to avoid cankles from hell. (No kidding!) I am with you there, I really don't want to do it. Why? Well first I am scared of medical procedures. I work in the health insurance business for 14 yrs and have heard it all. So yes, I am little scared to step in a hospital and into the hands of the power that be. But also I am mad at myself that I had to resort to surgery just because I haven't had the will power to do it on my own. That alone makes me get mad at myself. Like I failed myself. I know time is getting closer, so I am on an emotional roller coaster ride right now. I know the surgery will make me feel much better about myself. My boyfriend keeps telling me that he knows me and I am not going to fail after this surgery. He feels because I have invested so much already and after i cut up my organs, he feels I would do everything my power not to screw it up. I guess he trust me more than I trust myself. I have to learn and find the will power and overall it is work in progress. Thank you for understanding.

Thank you, I will definitely look it up.

I am pretty much doing this on my own. The only people that know about this is my boss (supportive), sister (non supportive of surgery) and my BF and he is on the fence about it. I try not to talk about it to anyone, because all people do is criticize. They would say I am taking the easy way out. Others have said it will fail because it failed others. I guess I think....am I going to go through all this, just to lose my hair, get sickly, flabby, and just be able to eat a tablespoon worth of food. I am just expressing what is on my mind...

So glad for you. So now that your one day post op, were you in a lot of pain after surgery? I am expecting mine in Jan.