gentylwind

If it does not get better, gets worse, is accompanied by fever and the best relief you get is to curl up fetal position, you need to have your appendix checked. This could be completely unrelated to your surgery.

I am in DFW too (Allen).

I am paying cash. My insurance does not cover WLS. I have no regrets. I am fortunate, though, not to be in a position of needing to get a loan or use a credit card to pay. Its just coming out of my savings.

Are they denying you the surgery based on this? Or is this just him wanting to show you where you could struggle after surgery and trying to give you tools to help you then?

That is fantastic! You are on your way!:biggrin: I have my psych eval this Saturday, meet with my surgeon a week from tomorrow and start my pre-op diet a week from this Friday!:w00t: Let's get it started in heah....:w00t:

I will not miss: Being treated wonderfully by men because I am pretty but never truly considered attractive Being discounted as any kind of competition by other women Shrinking in personality in order to make up for being huge in ass-ets Having to pay an arm and a leg to wear clothing that flatters me Daydreaming constantly about the kinds of dresses and lingerie I would love to wear for my significant other Having those flashes of insecurity when he wants to see me unclothed Heartburn from just about any food at all Planning my day around food and thinking about food almost all of the time. Living my life in a sea of self loathing that lingers just under the surface and comes up for air all too often Living my life in fear of growing old before I get to enjoy being young and pretty People who expect me to act a certain way because I am fat and then get either incredulous (and admiring) because I don't or getting hostile because I don't fit into their personal idea of what I ought to think I am worth Enduring comments like "I think it is GREAT you can STILL feel sexy...." with the "in spite of your size" left unsaid at the end. Privately thinking of myself as less than other people Being unable to take advantage of the SUPER cheap clothing sales at the end of the season because I tell myself I will be a different size come that time next year Remembering with each change of the season that at this time last year I was determined to be smaller when it came around again Hiding my hips behind my boys in any picture in order to camoflage their roundness Feeling like a moose when my SO pulls me into his lap Feeling like a moose when he wants me to be on top Not being flexible enough, graceful enough and not having enough endurance to be on top during sex. I also won't miss feeling like I am smothering him Worrying he secretly wishes he had someone thinner

I started gaining weight in my early teens. I idolized my brother, who was 18 months older than me, and when he hit male puberty, nobody bothered to tell me that I didn't need to keep up with him in my attempts to emulate him. I remember eating until I thought I would throw up, simply trying to eat as much as my brother did. I would pop Tums stolen from my father's vanity from a fairly early age in attempts to relieve the over-stuffed feeling. This all lead to a weight gain of course, though I was still in "normal" range at the very upper end (135-140 pounds, 5'3) Weight has always been a huge focus in my family. Being fat was unforgivable. As the only girl in the house other than my mother, what I ate and when I ate was carefully monitored. Separate food was purchased for me by my mother than for the rest of my family and the "good stuff" was hidden in various places and the amount of it carefully noted. I felt singled out and humiliated. My weight was a family conversation. My father would pinch my butt, criticize the way I dressed, wore my hair, wore my make up and criticized how much I weighed. It became my mission in life to find the good food and get my share of it. To this day, the minute I am alone in the house my first urge is to start searching for the "good stuff" (chips, Little Debbies, things like that) and then to gorge on them before anyone comes home. If I got caught doing this I was forced to confess it in front of my brothers. None of us could get up from the kitchen table until I admitted I ate the Fritos. This sent me spiraling more and more out of control and binging when alone became a way of life, along with attempts to then cover up my behavior. I stayed a pretty much high end of normal weight until I got married. At that time, I then just cut loose. Finally nobody was monitoring me anymore and I started to eat like a mad woman, everything I wanted, any time I wanted. I continued to eat when I was only one home as well. I gained 65 pounds with my first pregnancy and never lost it. I gained another 50 with my third pregnancy. My highest weight was over 280. I stopped weighing at 274. I weighed 135 on my wedding day and thought I was fat. I have lost successfully on my own and kept it off, but would like this tool to help me get the rest of the way. I will be seeing a counselor to help me deal with my deep seated food issues.

I am not telling very many people. My mother, my significant other, my older brother and a few select friends. I learned when I very first started looking into the band a few years ago and talked about the potential of it, the negative backlash was huge. I don't need any more angst going into this nor after it. Its a big enough change without having to defend myself or worry about gossip.

I have a full 14 days of liquids only prior to surgery. Has anyone else been "practicing" for this? I do liquid only meals here and there, have been working on not drinking with my meals, taking small bites, learning to chew chew chew and learning what a banded portion size is. I have also been making chicken stock and beef stock and oxtail Soup to have after surgery. Am I nuts? I read all these people eating badly after the band and failing and I SO don't want that to be me!

Yeah, I have only seen one place here in Dallas charge over 15K for lap band. The place I am using (and several others now I have found) cost $9990, all inclusive (except for the psyche evaluation and the pre-op Optifast). This includes the first six fills. Keep your chin up. There are more affordable options and you could look into financing as well.

I also thought Excedrin of any type was a no-no after surgery due to the aspirin in it...check with your doc. They should be able to shed some light on your sleeplessness and headaches too. :hug:

Lots of people get bloated when flying. It makes sense that it would affect your stomach/band also.

Self Indulgence Vs. Self Kindness Self Indulgence is: -Continuing to do what is harmful to you after you realize it's harmful -Loathing yourself -Getting lost in fantasies about how great your life is going to be, while you continue doing the same old self-destructive things -Not asking for help when you need it -Breaking the commitments you have made to yourself. Self-Kindness is: -Calling a halt to doing what is harmful to you -Defending yourself against anyone who attacks you -including yourself -Telling the truth -Asking for help -Resting when you need rest -Believing that there is a good reason for what you are doing, even if you aren't aware of it at the moment The only way to learn the difference between self-indulgence and self-kindness is to experience what self-kindness feels like. Ultimately YOU are responsible for what goes into your mouth. McDonald's has healthier options than two quarter pounders. You can't blame your friends for that. Have you ever asked them if you can go somewhere healthier to eat? Try sushi, try vegetarian, go to funky in-vogue "green" restaurants. And then MAKE GOOD CHOICES. You do sound like you thought the band would just stop you from eating. Only you can do that. Give yourself credit. 20 pounds is a lot of weight to lose. I walked around for a LONG TIME only needing to lose 20 pounds and could not bring myself to do it. 20 pounds matters. Get out and walk. It is a beautiful time of year to be out of doors. Practice thin behaviors now. Don't wait until you are thin. Ask yourself what you would do at McDonald's if you were the "you" you picture in your head at the end of this weight loss journey and make the choices THAT girl would make. When sitting home watching TV or listening to music catch yourself and ask how long if you were thin you would envision just sitting there, stay for that amount of time and then go do whatever the "thin" you would be up to. It isn't going to just happen sweetheart. Realign your thinking. You hold ALL the power here. That is the good news. Nothing can happen to you without your permission in regards to your weight.

WW does not focus on low carb. They have their points plan, which will likely give you too much food if you follow it, since with LB you are supposed to eat only three meals a day, 1 to 1 1/2 cups of food total per meal, no Snacks. They have their core plan, which is like South Beach and somewhat low carb. You could potentially make that work but will need to watch portions. I personally would worry about you getting confused between the way your doctor tells you to each with your band and the way that WW tells you to eat. Just something to think about.

I think if you are seeing success in loss of inches and less jiggle you need to pitch the scale for at least three months. It sounds like you are already doing well, just obsessed with something that in the long run should not matter. I always said if I could be a 200 lb size 8 that would be okay with me! Seriously. Stop weighing.

I am in the Dallas area and paying $9990, all inclusive for the surgery with the exception of the psyche eval and the pre-op Optifast. My price includes the first six fills over the first year as well.

Ever go to the meat counter and line up 76 pounds of pork loin? Its possible they don't even have that much put out for purchase. That is an INCREDIBLE achievement and you are to be commended! Next time you go to the store, do this. Line up as close to 76 pounds of pork loin as you can and look at it. Touch it. Move it around in your hands. FEEL what it feels like to NOT have that on your body anymore. It is very validating! If your family and friends are pressuring you, remind them that it did not come on overnight and isn't going to come off overnight either. It is also not uncommon for the very obese to need a second surgery after lap-band to get the rest of the weight off. Only time will tell. Be patient with yourself. Yes, you are anxious to see fast results, that is understandable. When that feeling of angst kicks in, reassure yourself that you are already on your way. Nobody gets in the car to drive from New York to San Diego and gets upset halfway through Nebraska that they aren't there yet. They know they have the map and are on the road and its going to take as long as it is going to take. You are doing fantastic. If you aren't attending support groups I suggest you start doing so now. You need to be around others that are not going to fuel that feeling of wanting it all right now, but who understand how long, tedious and tenacious this journey is.

Yes, money can be replaced, but without knowing the details of your personal financial situation it is hard to know if he is being reasonable or not. These are hard economic times for many families. If you are already in debt with house and car payments, credit cards and no end in sight, living paycheck to paycheck, that is one thing (and in that situation he is not out of line to veto the surgery right now)....however, if you are doing well, have more than enough income to debt ratio to meet your needs and still be putting money into savings, then yeah, I think maybe he is being unreasonable. There is no denying that it is going to cost your family, one way or the other, either through something drastic like WLS or through the health problems it gives you down the line. Just keep your financial situation in mind when y'all talk about this and present it to him in financial terms. Most men think that way to begin with. Also try to decide if money is his only objection. It may just be the easiest one to vocalize. If he is overweight or if he fears the surgery is dangerous, it may be easier to say that money is the issue than to admit he is afraid of losing you.

It is more likely that your body cranked out insulin in response to your eating and drinking the other night, triggering your body to want you to eat for the insulin to have "something to do". If you drop back to a high Protein, vegetables, no simple carbs, no alcohol, no fruit way of eating for a few days your hunger perception and cravings for more food will most likely disappear.

I think most of the people with long term success are not on the Internet..they are off living their lives. :biggrin: My ex-MIL (still friends) has maintained a 125 lb weight loss with the band for over five years now. I am optimistic. :wub:

Brian, I just want to give you a hug and tell you it is all going to be okay. If your employer did not purchase coverage for bariatric surgeries no amount of appealing will get them to do it. I would not waste your time on that. I thought about Mexico too but found a place here in Dallas that does it for under 10K. Be sure you get a doctor to do your fills and aftercare lined up BEFORE you go to Mexico to have this surgery. Seems a lot of the local doctors don't accept patients who had the surgery in Mexico.

My secret to get myself walking is to have my MP3 player packed full of upbeat songs that I love and then telling myself I don't have to exercise. I am just going out for a stroll, to enjoy the sun and fresh air. I tell myself, and really mean it, that I can just mosey along if I want to. Its not exercise, its entertainment. By the time I am back from my two mile walk, I am keeping up a good clip without even realizing it because I naturally keep pace with the music. Its great time to reflect and I find I feel awesome when I am done and have broke a sweat. Doing this, I average 2 miles in 35 minutes without even meaning to. As far as the food goes, I am no expert. I am not banded yet. But I have read enough to see you aren't following the band rules of three meals a day, no Snacks, and Protein first, vegetables second, fruits third and if you still have room, a tiny bit of carbs. Believe it or not, eating protein first, after two to three days, you will find your cravings for carbs/sweets goes away completely. To address motivation....nobody can tell you how to do that. You have to find it inside yourself. Get PISSED. You just had major surgery done to help you achieve your dream and you are SABOTAGING yourself. YOU are keeping YOU from having it. Get out of your own way!

I have noticed the same thing in regards to complications with the band. I am stunned how many people push the envelope just to see what happens. I note a strong correlation to following pre and postop guidelines and long term success with the band in place. Good luck!:smile:

I was not no gum forevermore, never, none, nada after the band is placed due to potential to plug the stoma and cause a need to remove the band emergently. Not worth it to me. I am giving up a lot to be sure. Gum is the LEAST of it.