FrankyG

Does your partner mind the skin? Sent from my SM-N910T using the BariatricPal App Nope. It's not that bad. Even if it was, he didn't mind me being fat, so why would he mind me being less fat with a bit of sag? We're all going to end up getting older and lose skin tone and get wrinkles and change appearance, so getting used to the idea that what you see right now ain't what you're going to look like 5 years, 10 years, 20 years down the road is probably a good thing to start getting comfortable with. Losing the weight was the best. I feel better and I can do more things and will (hopefully) live a much longer life with the guy that I love and who also loves me. THAT is what is important in my book. I get that appearance is important, but the husband thinks I am beautiful and loves that I'm more engaged in life, more active and involved in lots of fun things, and taking more interest in clothes and my hair and stuff I'd stopped putting much effort into. I have gorgeous foundation garments now (lots of fancy stuff but just plain pretty things because I can buy shapers and they smooth and hold things in perfectly). And I have nice clothes that look damned good on me and I can shop in regular stores if I want and if the price for all of that is a bit of saggy stuff when I'm buck naked? Yeah, I'm okay with it. But then again, I might be less saggy than many I've seen, so I guess take what I'm saying with a large grain of salt. And you say you can't afford any plastics in the event you have extreme saggy skin (not sure how much weight you have to lose and that would make a difference), but there are some instances where insurance will cover things like a tummy tuck if the pannus (apron of belly skin) is causing rashes (definitely discuss with your doctor since they probably will need to document stuff like that to make the case with insurance), and worst case, you cut out spending on non-essentials and get a second job or something to save like crazy so you can afford plastics a few years down the road. You can make it happen if it is truly important to you!

Your age really isn't as big an issue as other factors. It's how much weight you lose and how long you've been fat and to a lesser extent how good your genetics are (whether family members have "good skin"). If you have been very large for a long time (more than a few years anyway) it's going to mean your skin has been stretched out for such a long time that it might not bounce back as well. Obviously if you are younger, you do have a small advantage moreso than if you waited into your 40s or 50s. But the thing to remember is that loose skin is completely cosmetic and weight the advantages for your health and enjoyment of being a normal weight vs being fat. Frankly, cosmetically, a little loose skin is nothing to me compared to my health. I will deal with the skin if it becomes an issue, but I look waaaaaaaaay better now than when I was fat even with a bit of saggy skin.

Long term, do you still have the benefit of getting full faster / with less food. I believe you do, except of course the workarounds like chips etc which people can eat a large amount of.Yes that is my understanding. I'm over a year out, and still very aware of a restriction and make sure to measure my portions so I don't feel overly full (because that still feels very uncomfortable). Now that your stomach is kind of back to a bigger size, do you feel it is all on you to eat well and exercise, or do you think the sleeve is helping you long term.My stomach will never be "back to a bigger size" but it is slightly larger than it was right after the surgery. I can eat about 5 ounces of food and my doc said that was about the right size and I might be able to get up to maybe 6-7 ounces max over the years. The average stomach holds around 6 cups (a cup is 8 ounces so do the math). It has ALWAYS been all on me to eat healthy and exercise. The sleeve is only a tool to give me time help me deal with my food addictions and weight so I could take back control over my diet and lose enough weight to get more active. That's the whole point! I have no illusions about the fact that it is not the cure - my lifestyle change is possible through the sleeve, but it is 100% on me to work my ass off (literally) to change everything about how I eat and relate to food and exercise. And the hard to know question - if you felt exactly like you feel now (weight loss accomplished, control over eating, good routine in place), and your sleeve magically got replaced with your old stomach, would you be OK - i.e. is it basically all you these days this late in the game, or is the sleeve still helping? And would you swap back since your under control now so you don't have the odd things to worry about, e.g. Vitamins, drinking Water too fast, money back from surgery (if applicable)I'm not at goal, but getting close but still, no, I would not be okay and I would not go back to having my old sized stomach even if I could get all the money back, and I was self pay. I made a huge commitment and had much thought and effort and went through major surgery to improve my life. If I was put back to how I was before, but at the current weight, I'd not have the same motivation to keep improving and moving forward. I need the fact that I invested the time and energy and money into this to keep me honest. I also need the reminder that the sleeve's restriction gives me to help to not fall off the wagon.

I started walking every time I was stressed out or having anxiety. I've walked TONS in the last 6 months. Exercise is great for relieving stress so I was told, and it turns out in my case, it was true thank goodness. I also crank up a song (or three) that is super upbeat and dance and sing along to it when I'm feeling really down. I do this when I'm alone or at least where I can go do it in a room where no one will walk in on me since I'm sure I look like a crazy person, but it really does help. So sorry about your husband's layoff. I hope he finds something much better soon! (and a big congrats to you for not slipping off the wagon when hard times happened. Be proud of yourself - you rock!!)

I usually shop at HerRoom.com as they have great selection and a decent return policy. Highly recommended as they also have a great measurement tool and a universal sizing scale to help you figure out what size to order no matter the brand (since the stupid brands can't seem to be uniform across the sizes for some reason). If you need good quality bras, check them out. I have scored some great bras on Target in the last year tho. Just got a Paramour teeshirt bra (smooth cup) clearanced for $22 in the larger cup size (I'm wearing a 36G currently). It fits great, very comfortable and supportive after hours of wear. Even if it doesn't last for years, it was worth it. (the Paramour line seems to be good looking but lower cost, supportive large sized).

Check the ingredients, but many types of pork rinds are pretty much just the rind that was fried in its own fat with a bit of salt/spices. They have reasonable fat, zero carbs, high Protein and serious crunch - I eat mostly paleo, so this fits in that category for me. I'd not eat them every day, but when I'm craving salty and crunchy, (that time of the month mostly) they work well.

That's a pretty awful snack. It's got practically no Protein and is mostly carbs and it gets you started back on the carb train towards crackers and other bad stuff you should not be eating and should be avoided. I eat cheese sticks, slices of deli meat with pickle slices, carbmaster yogurt (available at Kroger), cottage cheese, pork rinds, or small amounts of mixed nuts like walnuts and almonds with a couple of low cal cheese wedges (think laughing cow).

There is no lotion or pill that is going to have any real effect on saggy skin. Using lotions is good for basic hydration of the outer surface, but that's it. It isn't going to radically fix skin that has been stretched out from being fat. Several things are in play for how well your skin will bounce back after weight loss: Genetics. If you have family members that are not real wrinkled and seem to be aging well, then chances are you might have a decent chance of having good skin. If you didn't get lots of stretch marks from gaining weight, then that is also a sign of good skin genetics. Count yourself lucky for this. Age is also a factor. If you're young, skin just has more elasticity. How fast you lose weight. If you are a fast loser, then the skin will sag much more. The slower/longer it takes you to lose, the more time your skin has to adjust to weight loss. Of course if you are a fast loser, you might look much more saggy for a while, but skin may tighten up after so long, so it's not terrible to be a fast loser. How long you've been fat. The longer you've been at a large weight and the longer your skin has been stretched out, the less likely it will bounce back as well. It is just like blowing up a balloon - blow it up and then let the air out immediately, the balloon will probably look pretty good, but wait for 5 days and deflate it and it will be stretched out and wrinkly. Same principle with skin. The best thing you can do is make sure to keep up with your Protein and Water. If you're taking your Vitamins, eat healthy and stay hydrated, that is your best path. By all means, use good lotions like coco butter to keep the outer layer hydrated and nice, but what you put in your body is probably the best way to help minimize the sag. Oh! And avoid tanning and sun damage, and exercise to build muscle since that also helps fill out skin that has lost fat.

I've had extensive counseling to deal with parent/inlaw issues and currently the husband's parents are cut off and may make that permanent. Just because you're related doesn't mean you have to put up with being treated poorly. Blood is NOT an excuse to put up with being a doormat. One of my counselors said something I still use to this day: "Of course your parents know how to push your buttons - they're the ones that installed them!" Stop giving your father information with which to use against you. Either use humor "I've lost so much I actually don't register on the scale any more so I have no idea how much I weigh!" or shut them down flat "I'm not talking about that any more because it makes me uncomfortable." and change the subject. And he gets a warning, then you remove yourself from the situation if he can't stop. So first you'd need to tell him that you no longer want to hear him criticize your weight or make mean comments about your appearance, and if he does, you will call him on it and may leave or cut the conversation off. If he does it anyway, then say something like "Dad, that was a very hurtful comment, and I don't think I want to talk to you any more. I'll check in with you/visit with you later." Then leave, or hang up the phone. It teaches them that if they want to have a relationship with you, they have to be nice to you. And you gain confidence by standing up for yourself and leaving/hanging up when someone treats you poorly. None of this is mean-spirited and should not be said with any anger or venom towards the other person, just calmly being assertive and telling people how you want to be treated. And then following through.

Please reconsider and let your boss know you'll be out for those two weeks at least a little before the actual time. You're screwing over everyone in your workplace by not giving them notice that you'll be out, and if it comes out later (or they even suspect that you had known you were having surgery and just decided not to tell anyone) they'll hold that against you down the road. Not in any way you could prove, but they can and will be pretty resentful and you may suffer for the lack of notice. Think about how you'd feel if one of your coworkers was out for two weeks with no notice and you had to pick up all of their work... And they can and will likely require the doctor's notice to come back to work after a few days if you tell them it was emergency surgery for something else, and if it comes from a doc that is a bariatric surgeon (which will be on their letterhead or easily google-able)... well, you'll end up revealing more than you planned on in the end. You don't have to tell them you're having WLS - I told my boss I was having abdominal surgery to correct a medical issue and that I didn't feel comfortable discussing the details so I didn't even lie. But do let them know so you won't be stressed about your job when you get back, they won't be stressed about the job while you're gone and you'll still have a job to come back to without lots of weirdness.

Definitely talk to your doctor especially if you have a family history of gallbladder issues. You can request all you want, but keep in mind they won't remove it unless it is medically necessary/indicated however.

If you haven't had any symptoms of gallstones, then removing your gallbladder isn't necessary. You would definitely know if you had symptoms, as gallstone attacks are some of the most painful experiences most people go through (similar to childbirth and passing a kidney stone). So if you're curious, ask your doc to about your gallbladder, but they'll likely tell you not to worry about it if you haven't had any attacks.

I haven't experienced this, but it might be caused by blood sugar levels changing too much after eating. Reactive hypoglycemia I think it's called. You can feel poorly physically but I'd imagine it would also make you feel bad emotionally as well if it's happening frequently. Might want to get your hormone and other blood levels checked to make sure there's not a physical/chemical reason for the sadness.

I'll try to address each of your issues/concerns from the info I've gleaned... but I'm no doctor so take it with that in mind. The big thing seems to be that you don't want to change any of your eating habits, just think that the portion control is your problem. But I'll tell you now, from what you have posted, you have a portion control and a crap food addiction. Unless you get them both figured out, you will not be successful in the long term. Weight loss surgery is not a cure all; it is a tool that give you control back for a portion of time which you are supposed to use to deal with your food issues and throw out how you eat now and relearn how to eat healthy for the rest of your life - it is not easy, and you will have to make a total lifestyle change if you want to be successful for the rest of your life. Yes, you will be able to eat things that are spicy/hot, and eventually you can eat things like a burger. Thing is, you should be adjusting over to eating healthier versions of things like hot wings (like baked, no battered - just saw someone posted a really good recipe for those), and eating the "regular" versions of stuff like that should be an occasional indulgence, not something you eat every day or even every week. You can eat pizza and fries and burgers... but why would you want to eat them the same as before surgery? They are bad for you, have little nutritional value and mostly are full of fat, carbs and sodium. You could eat smaller portions of crap and literally starve your body of nutrients. Which begs the question of why anyone would do that and expect to come out healthy and happy? You get about 12-18 months where the combo of the portion control (from the stomach reduction) and the lack of out of control hunger allow you to completely change how you eat. All of the doctors seem to like the high Protein, healthy veggie, and complex carb in moderation diet. You have to deal with your food addictions and issues during this honeymoon period and get adjusted over to eating healthy about 90% of the time, so that when you do eat something like a slice of cake for a birthday or a small burger at a cookout... it doesn't throw you off because you're not eating that stuff all the time. This is how the non-fat people eat; they have generally good control over their portions and don't eat crap every single day. Everybody will lose weight even eating crap for the first year or so. After about 12-18 months, however, if you haven't gotten yourself adjusted to eating healthy (good protein as the main portion of your meal, healthy veggies as a main side and complex carbs like brown rice or small serving of sweet potato if there is any room) you will start regaining weight. So losing your hair... it is temporary and it's because for about a month or two, you're going to have difficulties getting in enough protein and Vitamins to keep your basic body functions up. So one of the first signs of low protein/nutrition is losing hair (your skin and nails will also suffer a bit, but it almost always is the hair if nothing else). It starts around 3 months out, continuing for a few months while your body catches up to your increasing ability to eat protein in greater quantities. To minimize the issue, make sure to get in your protein ASAP. Also important for hair/skin/nails is to take your vitamins and drink your Water. Some people see little hair loss, some see gobs and freak out a bit. You have no way of knowing how your body will react, but it is temporary. Frankly being vain about my hair when I was grossly obese was almost laughable when I thought about worrying over it. So I didn't. Because my health is way more important than a few clumps more in the shower drain for a few months. And it's fine now - I have gorgeous hair. Carbonated drinks/diet soda. I drink them. I have one soda can a day usually. I open it in the morning, pour it over ice and let it sit for around an hour so the carbonation goes down significantly and the ice melts and waters it down. I also know that I'll never touch anything not diet, and that all sodas have a dehydrating effect (caffeine and sodium is very dehydrating), so I drink more than 64 ounces of water/light drink mix to make up for the fact that I drink a soda. My doctor does not like carbonated drinks, but he wasn't forbidding me from drinking them. But I also know that drinking them can slow down weight loss as well (the fake sugar/sweetener can still react with your metabolism). So if you choose to drink them, then know you're making the choice to continue something that is unhealthy and will effect how well you do with your sleeve. And finally your last thing about how life is too short to not enjoy your food... No food is worth sacrificing your health! You seriously need to make sure you get help understanding how twisted this viewpoint is, because you have equated food with pleasure and reward and that is so sad! (and I say this as someone that once thought that way, so don't think I'm judging you!) Your life WILL be too short if your trade-off is food over health. I freaking love food; I taught myself to cook when I was 8 years old and I can make stuff that would make you cry its so good... but I also realized I didn't want to be fat, sick and die in my 50s because I couldn't get control over my food addictions. I still eat fantastic food, but it's healthy and good for me and I feel great now. And because I changed how I cook, my dear husband is also much better - he lost over 70 pounds and says he's never been happier and does NOT feel deprived because we cook so many awesome meals that are good for us.

I used some pretty scarfs/sashes and tied them off. Looked nice and very soft. I'd check out thrift stores for those or belts that might work for cheap. I saw tons of elastic belts on Amazon with high ratings tho?

Not even taking into consideration the carbonation being a very bad idea that early, caffeine and sodium are both present in most sodas, and they both are dehydrating - they will make you feel worse, not better.

I eat sushi/sashimi about 2-3 times a week. Started eating sashimi at 3 months and was just fine. Usually I eat 3 pieces of salmon sashimi and then 2-3 small pieces of a sushi roll (usually lobster roll lately). I do tend to take out about half the rice from the roll's pieces tho. I'm about 1 year, 4 months out now.

The reason people gain weight back after having WLS is simple. They expected to have the surgery and continue doing exactly what they were doing that got them fat and unhealthy in the first place. So they don't change anything themselves. My experience is with the gastric sleeve, so the following is from that viewpoint, but even if you have a bypass, the basic features are the same. The surgery's success is because it performs two functions: first, it has an immediate effect of reducing portions. Portion control is also one of the only permanent features. This works for the rest of your life. In the beginning, you lose the overwhelming hunger too, as the main portion of the stomach that produced the hunger hormone is gone. The hunger will come back, but for the first 6 months to a year, you won't register hunger the same as before surgery. What this means is that you get a period of time where you regain control over your body and can change your habits and see real results. During the "honeymoon" time of roughly 12-18 months, you are supposed to throw out everything regarding how you relate to food. You get counseling or try to work through any psychological issues/attachments where you use food for comfort, for reward, whatever - replacing these habits with new healthy ones like exercise or other hobbies. You are relearning how to eat, what to eat and getting used to small portions of food. You make better choices and get your healthy Protein and veggies and complex carbs as your primary diet established and even if you have an occasional treat of a slice of cake or a piece of pizza it won't be something you gorge yourself on let alone even eat regularly any more. The ones that regain? They are the ones that never really used that honeymoon period to their advantage. They treated the surgery as a cure-all instead of seeing it for what it really is - a tool they needed to pick up and use properly and continue to use for the rest of their life. It requires a total mindshift to be successful long-term. My doctor said that anyone can lose weight for the first year even eating absolute crap. But once the person's metabolism catches up and resets to the amount of foods they eat, especially when they eat primarily crap foods or slider foods like ice cream or simple carbs - then they'll start regaining, and say that the surgery didn't work for them... but the fact of the matter is that they failed, not the surgery. I used to say I was happy at the weight I was for quite some time. I was even a "healthy" fat person - no high blood pressure, no diabetes, no cholesterol issues whatsoever. I looked perfect on paper other than my weight. But I knew that wouldn't last and I also knew that my world was getting smaller since there were so many things I know longer could do without feeling self-conscious or needing special accommodations... so I stopped doing them. And it took a death in the family for me to see that I was allowing my weight to rob me of living my life. I made the appointment with the doc and got surgery 3 months later and the only thing I regret is that it took me so long to do this. The years of my life I lost to being morbidly obese and unhealthy... just such a waste. I won't lie; this was and will continue to be hard work for the rest of my life. But I'm worth the work. So the real question here is - do you think YOU are worth it? Do you want to get free of the hold that food has over you? Do you want to give yourself a fighting chance of living a good, long life doing whatever you want to do?

Y'all are describing "food funerals" which is a very common thing before WLS. It's a weird thing to do because you could eat anything again eventually (whether you actually want to eat that crap later on is a different tangent). But the big problem is if you're on a liver reducing diet before surgery and don't stick to it, you could make it impossible to have the surgery if you don't reduce the liver enough for them to get in there and move it without injury (which you do NOT want to do - liver injury can be life-threatening).

I had to do it too for 2 weeks after, but can't remember how often I was told to use it.

I was a 44G before surgery and I'm a 36G now. They are slightly less full (skin is a bit wrinkly if I lean over or am laying down and they are not as firm) but still the same cup size after a 110 pound loss. I still have a ways to go to hit goal, so no idea if they'll go down further. I have hopes that the wrinkly skin will firm up a bit, but so far they're holding in there as far as appearance, and I was actually not wanting to loose too much cup size wise (fine with losing band size) because I like my general shape.

I think you need to stop googling stuff. Seriously. I could go out there and put up all manner of scare tactics and inflated ridiculous stories about why this or that is super scary dangerous and you are going to regret doing X, Y or Z. But you know what? It's all crap unless you know the site is reputable. That site is a Blogspot. You do get that means it's some joe schmoe that has no accreditation or even paid for their site (it's a Blogger site - ANYONE can make an "official" looking site on there!) And you're throwing yourself into a panic because they found a nearly 10 year old study that has been discredited already and was lacking randomized trials and included all deaths of patients - including the ones that died from suicide, drug overdoses and other obesity related events that were set in motion before they had WLS. In other words, the study sited is flawed. And did you read the invited critique of that study the website sited? It says not only was the study not done to look at bariatric surgery in real randomized trials but found... "Collectively these data suggest that the operations are not dangerous and that it may be a greater hazard to not induce weight loss for morbidly obese patients with concomitant medical complications" http://archsurg.jamanetwork.com/article.aspx?articleid=400686 Please call your doctor first thing Monday morning and ask for help. You need counseling STAT, and get in and see the doctor and tell them you are in a state of panic and need to get answers to help calm you down. It is going to be okay, really. You did something good for your health. It will work out in the end. But you have to stop focusing on bad things and panicking yourself. Stop looking on the web for stuff - you're only going to make yourself feel worse. Get real help from your doctor and from a therapist that you can speak with face to face. It will make a difference.

I was self pay, and I did meet with a nutritionist as they were a part of the practice's pre-op checks they make everyone do. I feel I got very little from them even through my post-op visits. But that is not because they don't have important skills and advice or are unhelpful. I read and research things to death, and understand caloric and nutritional needs VERY well now. I know all about how the body works with what is there, what comes in and what goes out and stalls and low carbing and all that stuff. I am confident that I can (and have) done a great job of managing my nutrition on my own. If you don't do your homework or have difficulties understanding your relationship with food and just need food help in general, a good nutritionist can be very beneficial.

I am so sorry for your loss. You really, really should be in grief counseling as well. Losing a loved one like that is devastating and there is no reason you should not go get professional help just like your granddaughter. Avoiding your grief and emotions and not knowing how to deal with them is going to make everything in your life harder - and eating crap foods is one of the signs that you really need help dealing with this. Please seek help and take care of yourself.

I went from being lukewarm on spicy foods to LOVING them after surgery. But you should probably wait to the 6 month point to start introducing spicy stuff into your diet, and go slowly. By that point, you should be off PPIs and adjusted to being on regular foods.