plump_princess

Well, since most black people don't own the companies that in the end choose the music they feel is "in" and worth promoting...... then isn't THAT the pot calling the kettle black (no pun intended) Besides, CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF,:omg: the majority of Black people are not rappers

That was my attempt at sarcasm..... so No, I'll probably not stop thinking what I think, b/c you think what you think. But, on the other hand, you'll never hear me use the word, anyway. Because I wouldn't use it with you. Wheetsin seems to be able to grasp what I'm saying a bit more. I'm not saying that calling people racial slurs is ok, it just exists... Most people are so caught up in ending overt racism, that they lose the full picture. Black people are not looking to the mainstream culture for acceptance about the language they use in thier homes/privates spaces... My point is, let's all focus on a REAL issue. Like, what brings one person to the point where they want to disrespect/degrade someone else. Or, why does one person feel better/more entitled than another because of physical traits... Or better yet, let's focus on how I really feel, and why it bothers me so, when two people connect on a level that I'm not used to/am not comfortable with....

ok, we'll all stop today....

I was banded this past Tuesday and went back to work on Friday of this week. I sat most of the day and left an hour early, but otherwise it was fine. It really depends on your job and what it requires of you.

OK, I'm glad to see others have had this problem, too. I'm Freezing. I wear a hooded sweatshirt over my pajama pants and shirt with socks to bed, under two comforters and I'm still freezing!

I had my surgery on 11/27 and I'm doing much better. I agree with the apple juice, I mix mine with 2 T of gross liquid vitamins.... It helps me to get them down, and gives me a little boost I need. I also have found that the protein shakes are the key to feeling better and stronger. I'm not in much pain, and have stopped all meds (I stopped taking the oxycodone the day after surgery b/c it makes me loopy and nauseous), even Tylenol and I'm living off my heat pad when things gets sore. Good Luck everyone, from what I've read next week is the really turning point... most people feel 100% at about 2 weeks out.

Selsie- One of my co-workers proceeded to tell me about a woman who died during surgery having a gastric. He was really scared for me. But, I was sure that, with the research I did, the odds of that happening to a 30 year old with no co-morbidities besides arthritis, was slim to none. The people who are the most afraid tend to be the ones the least informed. You've done the reading and the research.... and you're doing this for your health, which is what counts in the end. If I were going for a hip replacement, I don't think he would have reacted in the same way...... yet that's a pretty risky surgery in terms of bloodloss and outcome.... so be strong, be confident, and do what you feel is the best decision for you!

I'm a few days out and here's what I'm allowed to eat, 48 hours out: Light yogurt no chunks Protein shake w/ice and skim milk plus (whey Protein from Target, vanilla, is good) apple sauce tea w/out caffeine (herbals are good) sugar free Jello broth (made myself w/turkey and veggies) lots of H2O that's it the list.... But of course, I would call and check with your doctor about what he/she allows

You go girl! You're an inspiration! Can't wait till I can say the same.

It's not blasphemous, It's in the bible.... spare the rod, spoil the child. Yet, It's also in the bible that you should instill morals and values in your child. And, It's also in the bible that we should be loving and kind and use good judgment I think that MA should create a law against unfit parents. Discipline should be administered lovingly to children, because you care about them, and want them to see the wrong in what they've done, when other measures don't work. It's not a replacement for talking to your child, adjusting their reasoning via a sound discussion..... But to actually band spankings--isn't that a bit unreasonable? We should ask these government officials what they would do to a one year old who just stuck his hand on a stove for the fourth time? Even if they haven't gotten burned because the stove wasn't on.... we, as parents, know this could be dangerous activity, eventually leading to some pretty bad outcomes. What should you do? Have a detailed discussion with the child on the implications of putting your hand on a stove/in fire? If politicians could just use their common sense....

I'm also two days post op. I've found that taking extra strength Tylenol instead of the prescribed pain relievers keeps me from doing too much too soon, helps everything flow more easily (gas, BMs) and more quickly, and leads to an overall easier recovery. I don't think I've felt the stitches so much. I more feel an overall soreness across my middle. Try resting, drinking your fluids, and laying/sitting down with no less than 8 pillows all positioned to support the right places Good Luck,

Here's our Mini Schnauzer, Chase, who thinks she's everyone boss.... She is my husband's dog (as my groomer calls her...) She is only well behaved when he's around. She's also great around my daughters.

I am being banded tomorrow, the 27th and I am so nervous, yet excited.... I have a lot things I want and need to accomplish, and this is one step towards acheiving my goals.... Good Luck to Everyone...

It could be a cop out.... or an explanation for something that exists within the A/A culture in general-- and in it's various forms of communication, music, etc. Is it right to use that word? ---you're right it's probably not for anyone of any color...but judgments from the outside tend to be tunnel visioned.... and tends to leave details out... for someone who can't see and experience how it "works" in conversation within the A/A community it can be hard to understand.... it loses it's meaning in the translation into the "American" vernacular In Spanish Negro is black, simply a color, in Haitian Creole, Negre (translated nigger) is just the normal way you refer to a man, any man. In those countries they don't take it as an insult, It's Americans and American culture who have taught Blacks to react the way they do to that term, and when A/A attempt to adopt it and attempt to recreate and re-invent it....well then, WE'RE wrong! For years A/A have been looking for acceptance, A/A were trying to change how they are referred to, trying to find something that would be viewed as good and acceptable by mainstream culture: N*ggers ---> Negros ---> Black---> Afro- Americans---> African-Americans When acceptance never happened..... they reinvented the original.... That's my theory (not to be mistaken for an excuse)... cop out or not

I want a bodybugg... I'm really into gadgets and this seems like a great one.... Has anyone been able to purchase it using a flexcare medical expense account? If I could, I'd purchase it today!

I hear you.... but sometimes people, within casual conversation call each other things that the wouldn't call each other in public view.... I call my best friend "bratty" or "fatty" or if we're talking about sex... I may even call her a "slut"...(playfully) I call my husband "poppy" or "daddy" ....I would never expect that someone outside of our realm uses the same terms.... the word nigger became entrenched in the vocabulary of A/A not by their own volition..... A/A started answering to it because they had to.... now that its adopted into the culture's lexicon, it doesn't mean, you-- as an "other" can go ahead and use it.... b/c you're not in that culture.... I've known many an Italian that refers to himself as a Guido... or lesbians that describe themselves as dykes.... or Asians who refer to themselves as Chinks... That does not give me the right to use that term to describe them or call them out in public..... but, nor do I have the right to tell someone how they should/should not speak or to refer to each other.... it's not my business, really, and should not be my concern... as long as their ok in their own skin... right? When I say it...it's not ill-intended.... It doesn't mean to me what it means to someone outside the culture...shouting at someone who's within it... This is a pretty dumb (albeit controversial) topic anyway..... It's as if someone is looking for permission to say a word she knows she shouldn't be using.... and If you don't take my word for it....Go to any corner in Newark, NJ and refer to someone as a n**** , and see how it works for you... :omg:

I use the word AND it bothers me when someone who's not entitled to use the word uses it..... I may sound strange.... but to me.... the only people who've been able to understand that black, African-American -ness are black/African-American people. Stereotypes are stupid. Haitians on an island in the Caribbean don't have the same culture/language/experiences as an A/A living in the States, but we'll both be called a n*gger just the same..... who does that? Are Jews being called Irish-slurs? Are Italians being mistaken for Israelis? Why is there this group of people that have been lumped together based on color? Seems a bit arbitrary. Why not just lump people together based on eye color? or.... pants size? brain capacity... it'd be just as stupid. People look at me and see African-American...... I'm actually not.... I'm part English, part French, and very Haitian..... I'm fluent in three languages, I have several degrees, I'm more than meets the eye..... What I love the most is, for example, when I brag about my little brother who had a full ride to Rutgers and the white people who would ask me...."What sport does he play" Actually none.... he's just smart! He didn't get into college because of quotas.... he got a near perfect score on his SATs.... My brother is now at Stanford earning a Ph.D. in Physics and he deals with this bullshit everyday....and my thing is.... don't walk up to me and say "yo" to me like you have an clue about who I am or where "I'm from", don't wish me a HAPPY KWAANZA, just don't a-s-s-u-m-e anything about me because of the color of my skin....and don't use a word that you haven't earned the right to use....You're not part of the club, unless you live it... and on that note I'm off to :notagree

Dr. Abkin is my surgeon...he's out of Morristown, NJ and so far everythings been great. The patient education and the office staff are very good. I was approved within less than a week after submitting the paperwork to BCBS.... and he's on NJ Monthly's list of the Best Doctors in NJ under Bariatric Surgeons... He does surgeries in three different hospitals, so you can pick the one that's closest to you.... www.alsbariatricsurgery.com

hmmm....ok... ' Rating Description 0 Exclusively heterosexual 1 Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual 2 Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual 3 Equally heterosexual and homosexual 4 Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual 5 Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual 6 Exclusively homosexual X Asexual interesting...

Just mytwo cents--<br /> If everyone were willing to admit to the pagan roots of Christmas... The fact that the entire holiday season is based on drinking, overeating, and excessive expenditure all in the name of someone that most don't regard as the authority in their lives anyways...... The fact that Santa screams a pseudo-obscenity would be a non- issue and everyone could go on with their lives overspending at the mall and drinking spiked egg-nog while their children open their presents in the name of Jesus....

got my approval! i'm scheduled for Nov. 27th!

My office says BCBS of NJ takes less than two weeks to approve once they actually submit the paperwork.... (they said they usually don't tell patients that, though). I'm also awaiting approval, my paperwork was submitted Friday.

:confused:I want a bug... I see I'm a few days too late on the deal... If any new ones come along let me know! ... I need a bug!

I've had very supportive family members and some not so supportive. But, then I realized, the family members that have been supportive are the ones who have always been there for me in the first place. The unsupportive ones who give me the third degree about the process and as a rule-- who are the most judgmental seem to be "see you at the next family gathering" types, who are never around-- and surprisingly, grossly overweight themselves. Misery loves company and family members can be toxic people, too. I've made the decision to surround myself with positive, supportive people and I choose to focus on me, my life, and my future for a change!

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